The Marauders Fifth Year
by 627283377
Summary: As fifteen year old boys, not much has changed yet so much has. The boys are back and they're coming back with new goals in mind, new aspirations, and new plans (and of course, new pranks). The Marauders have returned and are determined to make this year a promising one.
1. I: Remus's Promise

**All rights remain.**

"How is this supposed to go?" Remus asked.

The Marauders were back. The fifth years were enjoying a summer's day outside with Peter's camera. It was a week before the school term and the boys were walking along the beach of the Atlantic Ocean. James's father agreed to take them to the ocean if they would get their shopping done without causing their entire family stress. The Marauders, of course, heartily agreed; Peter brought his camera along.

"You are holding it wrong, Remus," Sirius said, sweeping his hair back

Not long after Sirius returned home for the summer holiday, he was accidentally hit with a silver platter his mother had thrown out of rage. His eye was blackened but that did not alleviate his happiness.

"Hang on," the werewolf muttered impatiently then turned the camera around. "Is this better?"

"Loads," Sirius said and waved at the camera. "I am Sirius Black! I am using a camera! And we are at the Atlantic Ocean on a beach! You can see those people over there swimming...and those other people just laying there..."

"What are you planning on doing today, Sirius?" Remus asked, motioning to the camera.

"Everything!" Sirius said and raised his arms to the sky.

James and Peter came running up to them from the water. Their pants were rolled up to their shins and the dry sand stuck to their feet as they ran through it. Remus and Sirius broke off from their film to look at their other friends.

"The water is great," James said, looking over his shoulder. "Oi, Remus. You're gifted with this kind of knowledge. Do you think long walks down the beach are romantic?"

"What makes you think I would know the proper answer?" Remus snorted, folding his arms.

"I dunno, mate. You do read romance novels, don't you?" James asked, raising an eyebrow added with the tiniest hint of a smirk.

"If you would consider War and Peace or Bleak House or A Tale of Two Cities a romance novel instead of classics that I suppose. But last time I checked, those were considered muggle classics," Remus said, not bothering to hide his smirk.

James groaned. "Will you just answer my question?"

"Yes," Remus said.

"'Yes' what?"

"Yes."

"Remus."

The fifteen year old rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Yes, James. That is my answer. Long walks on the beach are considered a romantic thing to do. Why do you even care?"

"Oh," James said in a long and drawn out 'oh'. "I am just coming up with new ways to ask Evans on a date and this could be one of the things I could invite her to do with me. No girl can resist a romantic walk around the lake."

"You do you," Remus said, holding up his hands. "I have given up trying to understand you a long while ago."

The Marauders (platonically, mind you) took a lengthy walk down the beach. They walked for miles before they realized the sun was well on its way. They more or less jogged back, occasionally stopping to catch their breath, until they found James's parents.

James's parents were enjoying the beach, too. They were both sitting a grassy part of the beach with books in their hands. From their angle, they could see Mr. Potter's wand sticking out from underneath his book bag. Mrs. Potter's wand was stuffed into her purse, which sat next to her.

"Did you enjoy your day?" Mr. Potter asked, raising his eyebrow at them.

"The best," James replied and earned a teasing scoff from his father.

The lot of them packed away their belongings, hurried to a secluded part of the beach (where the dense forest covered them) and apparated back home. Remus clung to Mr. Potter's arm with James while Mrs. Potter took Sirius and Peter back.

Remus doubted he would ever get used to side apparation; his feet slammed against the floor and he had to take a second for his insides to catch up with his outsides. Clearly his friends were no more or less used it either.

"I bet you boys are hungry," Mrs. Potter said and hurried towards their (very large) kitchen.

The boys eagerly followed, their hunger was gnawing at them for quite some time and they would constantly walk past people who were smart and brought food with them on the beach. They had to endure walking next to a person (temporarily) who had a delicious looking sandwich with the greatest smelling basil or pesto scent.

"What are we having?" James asked, taking a seat next to Remus.

"How about steak? We haven't had any steak in a long while, have we?" Mrs. Potter said and pulled out he frozen steak. "This won't take long, I promise. I know Sirius dear, you were practically starved at your home."

Sirius's stomach rumbled loudly but what Mrs. Potter said was absolutely true. Sirius hardly had anything. His parents were always too busy to make time for him and they had forbidden Sirius from using the kitchen or asking Kreacher to make his food. It was usually them who brought Sirius food. It was often a loaf of bread, water, and some peanut butter. The eldest Black heir was so hungry, he even ate the peanut butter plain. He depended on the water to curve his appetite. And in result, Sirius had definitely lost needed weight and it was visible enough for his friends and concerned adults.

"You really have lost some, mate," Remus said, scrutinizing his friend with seriousness.

"No problem," Sirius said happily. "I'll get it back with ease."

"Good," Mrs. Potter said and used her wand to start heating up the steak. "Do we want some French wine as a sauce and rosemary? Peter, I know that is one of your favorites."

"Absolutely," Peter said enthusiastically.

"Is that even a question, Mum?" James asked with a laugh.

The Potter family and friends were able to enjoy a very well done and well prepared meal (made by James's mother, who happened to be a very impressive cook, muggle or wizard way). When they were eating, Remus managed to forget all of his aches and pains that would frequent his body with every movement he made. The pain was so constant, he began to learn how to occlude the worst of it until it became nothing but a dulled jab.

With James's family and his friends, Remus could forget about his condition, just for that time, and for that he was grateful.

"Dessert?" James asked.

Sirius perked his head up at the mention of dessert. Having a son who absolutely adored dessert, Mr. and Mrs. Potter had a plethora of desserts and brought them all out on a decorative platter.

"Try these!" James said and shoved a pasty looking dessert at his friends. "They are amazing."

Sirius was the first to try it; his face instantly brightened. Before long, The Marauders were stuffing themselves with chocolate filled custard tarts.

When they finished their desserts, the family helped clean up (although most of it was done by magic); afterwards, Mrs. and Mr. Potter went up to bed and The Marauders were lounging about in the family's great room.

Remus noticed how Gryffindor James's family really was. James's father, the werewolf knew, was a proud Gryffindor and liked to show it off. Intelligent and chivalrous, James already inherited some pretty great traits from his father.

And then James had his mother's unmarked beauty, lean physique and her unbelievable intelligence. James Potter really hit the gene jackpot.

Remus almost laughed to himself. What had he inherited? He took after his mother's brain and his father's thinner physique but that was where the similarities ended. There were so many discrepancies between son and parents for he looked nothing like this family.

Remus snorted; he was nothing compared to James when it came to looks or social skills. And it did not help his self-esteem when the tiny voice in the back of his head was sneering at him over the fact that James was not living (and probably dying) from a condition.

The fifth year looked about the room and noticed there was not a single patch of green in the room. How Sirius's parents would hate that.

And then Remus's quisling mind went to his friend, Sirius Black. He blinked once…then twice and realized just how much his friend really changed through the years of friendship (and not just emotionally).

Sirius, like James, was absolutely god-like with his appearance. Though he put no effort in his exterior, he naturally had that graceful demeanor that people could only dream and wish they ever had. Remus watched countless times as girls swooned over the eldest Black heir. With his perfectly lush hair and his sharpened gray eyes, his cheeky personality brimming with so much confidence, Sirius was hard to ignore.

Sirius was not only graced with a good appearance, he was also very intelligent. The student could do very well on an exam without even opening a book. Though Remus doubted he would ever be able to tell his friends this but it annoyed him that he had been cruelly became friends with two infallible human beings.

Peter, who was sitting on the chair, slumped over as he fell asleep. Contrary to popular belief, Remus envied Peter. The boy could sometimes be the slyest of them all; with a belied personality reserved for strangers, Peter could seriously manipulate people. It was a gift that one hardly anyone could emulate. Maybe he was not blessed with the statue-like body and the god-like face but Peter was that kind of person who could influence and impact anyone's life with his own decisions if he wanted to. That was a bitter blessing in itself.

Little did Remus know, as he was picking at his flaws, James and Sirius and Peter were all looking at Remus and feeling a bit worse about themselves.

James sighed inwardly as he examined his friend and he deeply envied the way Remus was able to hold himself together so successfully despite what he has to go through. It bothered James greatly how nice and kind and caring Remus was to people when he, himself, was suffering so much. It bothered James greatly how Remus was just so _brave_.

Sirius stole quick glances at Remus and sat there, sitting across from him, how he so wished he could be more like Remus. Sirius knew he was not the most modest person on the earth and he knew that he was not the nicest Marauder. He knew that he was not the flawless one. That title went to Remus (despite his lycanthropy). Sirius wished he could be like Remus. Sirius wished he could be brave.

Peter felt a blow of envy then a swoop of comfort as he looked at Remus. Graced with beauty (despite his scars) and intelligence and natural kindness and the ability to speak to whomever he wanted without having to worry about what others would think about the "Follower" of The Marauders. Peter knew he did not have the intelligence like Remus or the honesty. Peter knew he was like a shadow of the other standing tall and brave against whatever he feared the most.

"The silence is kind of bothering me," James said and looked at his fidgeting hands.

"Do you know when we are going to Diagon Alley?" Remus asked, looking up from his book.

"My mum, I think, has a set time and date. She's been muttering about to herself for ages now. I think she wants to try something different," James said and started closing his eyes. "But I can always ask her in the morning."

"Are we going earlier like last time? I don't mean time-wise either, I mean date-wise," Sirius said, making sure his arms and legs did not dangle over the couch.

"I believe that is something she'll be sticking to," James said with a nod of household had their absolute fill, they all pitched in to cleaning the dishes (which was mostly done by magic) and they all tramped off to bed. James, Sirius, Peter, and Remus's conversation was slowly falling to a standstill as each of them fell asleep.

Remus dreamed (like he always did) of himself absolutely failing everything.

 _Remus, who was sitting on a bench in the middle of an open grassland, came to realize the night had spread its wings across the sky and the moon decided to make its way to the sky early. James, who was sitting adjacent to Remus, did not notice Remus going rigid in his seat. Sirius frowned and sat back to take a look at his friend. Remus, however, was not saying anything._

 _"Are you all right?" James asked._

 _But the transformation was much quicker than Remus had anticipated for he knew he was a werewolf. He knew he was looking through the eyes of the beast and for some odd reason he did not warn his friends to run. He wanted them to stay right there and worry about him._

 _With his teeth bared, his heart raced as he lunged at James first. The bespectacled boy shouted in surprise and fell to the ground, writhing underneath the claws of Remus. The werewolf watched with joy as James begged and pleaded with Remus, imploring him to let go and telling Remus that he was hurting him._

 _"Get off, get off, Remus. You are hurting me," James said and tried pushing the large paws off his chest. "You're hurting me. Please, Remus, get off me."_

 _The werewolf merely snarled and bent low with his teeth bared. His eyes gleamed with the prospect of being able to sink his teeth into something struggling as if he was killing prey in the wild._

 _"No! No! Get away from my friend!" Sirius bellowed and blew Remus backward with a single wave of his wand._

 _The Black heir advanced on him with his wand pointed straight at his heart. Two hands on the wand, Sirius began walking forward with Peter coming at Remus on the left. The werewolf was being pushed away from the boy laying and gasping on the ground._

 _"Get back!" Sirius and Peter shouted together._

 _The werewolf roared unpleasantly and started walking forward but both Sirius and Peter shot him back again. The werewolf screamed and favored his burned foreleg. Sirius and Peter were still advancing but Remus was wildly determined to have his prey for himself._

 _The werewolf lunged at Peter first; he aimed a few good shots at Remus but he managed to burst through the pain and clamp his jaws around Peter's leg, immobilizing him. Peter cried out but the damage was done. He had become infected._

 _Sirius was shooting round after round, coming up from behind and trying to aim for the head. The werewolf reared and bolted right at Sirius next. The fifth year stood there stunned for the briefest of moments before he raised his wand again and started firing off random spells that would force the werewolf back. But Remus was determined to kill or change this one, too._

 _"You stay away," Sirius said and aimed a shot at the werewolf's eye but missed._

 _This enraged the werewolf and Remus launched himself at Sirius roared, letting the saliva drip from his loose jowls. Sirius did not beg, he did not cry out, he did not say anything. But the werewolf wanted to make sure Sirius felt all the pain he did when he was bitten so he clamped down hard on the shoulder and locked his jaws into place._

 _That got Sirius writhing. It was the most bloodcurdling scream he had ever heard and yet it was the most satisfying sound he heard all evening. Sirius a writhing mess of blood and pain and Remus loved every moment of it. He loved inflicting pain upon those who provoked him. He loved playing the game of sweet revenge._

 _And then Remus was looking...at his four year old self underneath his claws. He was looking at himself. He watched as the younger version of himself crumpled to the ground, screaming for his mother, screaming for his father._

 _Remus watched as he planted the child in front of his parents and pinned him there, in his parents' view but just out of reach. He could see two other werewolves besides himself. He snarled low at one and received a low growl in response._

 _He could see his younger self say something to his mother that made her twist and struggle and fight underneath the werewolf in apparent rage. In absolute rage. He watched as his mother grasped her husband's hand and the two of them commenced against the werewolves._

 _With a quick finish, the werewolf with the darker fur killed the husband in an instant; the man was dead before he hit the arms of his wife. The younger version of himself was shouting his voice away, was screaming for his father, was begging him to stay alive, was consoling his mother. It was a bloody mess._

Remus jolted awake and the dream came back, rushing at him with vividness that he would never be able to forget. He dreamed he had become Fenrir Greyback and it was not a dream. Remus was beginning to fear for quite some time that he was going to become like that monster that had destroyed so many lives. He was young, much too young, to waste himself away like that.

But it was almost like Fate had seized his chances of becoming normal and crushed it in the palm of its hand. Remus buried his face in his hands and just sat there on the comfortable chair with his face covered, staring into darkness. He rested his forehead against his knees and just sat there, wishing he was anywhere but near his friends.

He feared what he dreamed would someday come true. If that were to happen, he would never forgive himself. He would be utterly destroyed, he would be nothing but a shell of his former self.

And that would be an empty shell.

What was he going to do?

And then he looked over at his friends and felt a seed of hope growing in his chest. They never absconded when the truth cascaded. They never flinched away or screamed monster and ran away. They stuck with him so he was going to do the same. Instead of worrying about hurting or killing them, he promised them he was going to protect them.

He was a werewolf, he was powerful, he was strong, and he was not going to let anyone come near those he cared for.

That was a promise Remus could keep.

That was a promise Remus will keep.

* * *

 **No worries, the chapters will be longer. This was an introduction.**

 **Also, I am pretty well aware my first two stories were not so great. I suppose these stories have been improving over time but I am pretty well aware. Once I finish up this entire series, I will go back.**


	2. II: What Went Wrong At Diagon Alley

**All rights remain.**

"Remy."

Remus groaned, annoyed that he was awoken from his nice dream.

"Remy, wake up."

Remus did not answer, he kept his eyes closed and his mouth shut.

"Remy, get up."

Remus, who was laying on his back, pulled up his knees and threw his hand over his face to hide his grin.

"Remus, I swear you are going to regret not answering me..."

This time, Remus felt a hard jab just below his rib cage and he instantly sat upright. Glaring at James, he rubbed his bruising abdomen and waited for James to say something. His bespectacled friend looked a bit tired but his eyes were nonetheless bright and awake.

"I'm up," Remus said and rubbed his eyes. "What's up?"

"Mum is going haywire," James said and pinched the bridge of his nose, making his glasses ride up his nose a bit. "She's going berserk; I think she flipped out on Dad twice and it is only one in the morning!"

"Why?" Remus said, his tiredness evaporated quickly as James sat at the edge of his bed. "What is the urgency, my friend?"

"I didn't tell you? I actually didn't tell you?" James said and flicked his eyebrows in surprise. "Well, Mum paid certain shops in Diagon Alley to reserve the store for us. She paid Flourish and Blotts, Amanuensis Quills, Eeylops Owl Emporium, Madam Malkin's Robes For All Occasions, Quality Quidditch Supplies, and all that."

"No, mate. You failed to tell me about this," Remus said threw back the covers. "Hang on, I have my jacket here somewhere."

"Is it that blue duffle coat?" James asked, suddenly sounding a bit coy. He awkwardly started carding his fingers through his hair as Remus turned around slowly, eyeing him warily.

"Yes," the werewolf said slowly and narrowed his eyes. "What have you done with it?"

"Me?" James screeched and gestured to himself. "I am 99% sure I am completely innocent!"

"So what happened to that other percent?" Remus muttered, moving about the room to change his clothes. "Because that jacket was the coat I wear in the winter and you will not tell me I have no winter jacket."

"No, no," James said with a nervous laugh. "No, no, no. No, Remus. No, you'll have...my pea coat; you know, that black one in my room? The one hanging over that red chair, yeah?"

"James, what did you do to my jacket?" Remus sighed with exasperation and rubbed his eyes wearily. "Never you mind; I need a jacket and I'm going to shower—"

"Can't you wake Sirius up first?" James asked, whipping around as Remus headed for the bathroom door connected to his room. "I'm going to wake up Peter. _Please_ , Remus?"

"Fine!" Remus said and shot a glare at James as he departed from the room. Two turns down short hallways and three doors in, there was Sirius's room. Remus nearly took the wrong time but he noticed the little trail of bad smelling potions from a prank that went wrong. Remus sighed to himself and knocked on the door. When there was no answer, Remus tried the doorknob.

"Sirius, mate?" Remus asked quietly, knocking on the door again. "Are you awake?"

Sirius did not answer but his position looked way to unnatural for Sirius to still be asleep. Remus frowned slightly and hurried over to the foot of Sirius's bed. The boy still seemed to be subconscious. His breathing was deep and even, making him look like he was honestly in a slumber.

"Mate," Remus said and came over a bit closer to the edge of the bed. "It's time to get up."

There was still no response so Remus stuck out a hand and lightly prodded his friend. "I hope you're not dead; we've got to go and James's mum will go with or without you. She's apparently going crazy over this shopping thing."

Sirius stirred ever so slightly but he did not open his eyes. Remus knew the other could not possibly still be asleep after Remus talked right into his ear. He had slept in the same dormitory with Sirius for four years; his friend was not that deep of a sleeper.

"Sirius, I know you are awake," Remus snapped, growing impatient. "I want to take my shower but James insisted I come and wake you up first."

Sirius's eye opened and the Black heir smirked like it was all his business. "I'm up. What about taking a shower? Are you taking it in here because I need to shower myself...I haven't had one in a—"

"Don't finish that!" Remus said and backed away a step or two. "And no, I'm taking a shower in my bathroom. James just wanted me to wake you up first. By the way, you were definitely awake or you are just extremely deaf."

"No," Sirius said with a chuckle. His smirk grew even wider and he threw his hands over his eyes. "I was awake when you knocked on my door. I just wanted to annoy you, mate, because it's so easy to do nowadays."

"Shut up," Remus muttered and strode towards the exit. "You're a git, yeah? But seriously, hurry up. James is waiting for you."

"Enjoy that shower," Sirius said and Remus turned around to see Sirius (sitting up) wink at him.

Remus suppressed rolling his eyes and he left with the door open. He turned back into his own room with the deed done and he finally was able to enjoy the shower. He felt the need to shower everyday to make sure he was practicing good hygiene. His friends often made fun of him but he didn't exactly care per say so as long as he was clean.

When Remus emerged from the bathroom and fully clothed, he startled when Sirius wolf-whistled at him. The impish friend was sitting on Remus's bed, looking like he had just finished his own shower and waiting for him, he grinned that turned more into a smirk.

"What, prat?" Remus asked, seizing the pea coat that was left on the chair. "And why are you in my room?"

"So I can admire my dearest friend, Remus John Lupin," Sirius said with a grin, which grew wider when Remus flipped the water from his sandy hair.

"Get out of here, Sirius," Remus said, not even blinking an eye in Sirius's direction. "Okay, what do you think? Is my outfit suitable for public eye?"

Remus spread his arms out wide and presented himself as a joke. The Marauders would always make fun of each other's muggle attire for it was mostly very atrocious. But today, Remus was wearing his white shirt with James's jacket and black pants that showed off his lithe frame.

"Wow," Sirius said and laughed. "You've passed the inspection!"

"Let's see if you can," Remus said and leaned against the doorframe.

Sirius spread out his arms. The student had a white shirt with a black flannel and dark pants; his friend looked very much like a muggle wearing something casual—nothing that would spark any attention from anyone.

"At least it's nothing like what that Bernie was wearing that one time at Hogsmeade," Remus said with a snicker. "Do you remember that? It looked like a disaster, the poor bloke. He hadn't really a clue what to wear."

"Well, he was wearing plaid pants with a checkered shirt; his girlfriend must have gotten an awful headache looking at him. We all know whose date went terrible," Sirius said then raised his eyebrows. "We all know who didn't get—"

"Don't finish!" Remus cut in and pushed his friend off his bed. "Move; I need my book bag."

"Already have that," Sirius said proudly and showed Remus his book bag. "What is this? Am I more prepared than you?"

Remus rolled his eyes and pulled out his trunk, which had his book bag inside it. "No, Sirius. You just got ready faster than I did."

Remus was walking around his room, making sure he did not forget to pack any last bit of belongings. The four of them were leaving for the Hogwarts Express as soon as they would get home. The reason why they did not go shopping earlier was Mrs. Potter's job was keeping her from coming home at a regular time. Mr. Potter, who was an Auror, was receiving more calls in his office.

There was no denying there was a war that commencing. Only a fool would protest but it was a matter of believing in those you put your faith in. Remus was taught to trust Dumbledore and that was exactly what he did. So, in result, Remus was packing early and Sirius was finding more and more ways to annoy him.

"Give me your money, old man!" Sirius said, gripping Remus in a headlock. "Give me your money now!"

"Sirius Orion Black," Remus said and stifled his impatient tone. "I am in no mood for your games. Can you please just...let go of my throat so I can resume and finish my packing?"

"You are literally no fun," Sirius mumbled but dropped his arms and clung to Remus by the midriff. "You're too skinny to be a good pillow. No wonder Alice wouldn't—"

"Finish that sentence and I will hex you when we get to school like crazy," Remus said and removed Sirius's arms. "Now move, I am nearly done packing. I just need to walk and I can't do that with you hanging off of me."

"Pushy," Sirius joked and let him go.

The walk downstairs was far too arduous. It was really only two flights but with Sirius trying to ask Remus for a piggy back ride whilst walking down, the trip took twice as long. More than once, Sirius jumped on Remus's back and took the other by surprise to the point where they both nearly fell down the rest of the flight.

"Get off me!" Remus snapped for the third time as Sirius jumped on him. "You are making this twice as difficult."

When they finally made it down, they saw Peter yawning hugely at the kitchen table, James sitting next to Peter, and James's parents standing a little ways off in their kitchen, talking quietly with one another.

"Finally," James said and rolled his eyes. "Seriously, how long does it take you to get ready?"

"When you have Sirius with you, it takes twice as long," Remus said and threw a glare in his general direction. "How are we getting there again?"

"Floo," Mrs. Potter said as she rummaged through her large handbag. "I know I put my list here somewhere...Cicero dear...you saw me write that list, didn't you? I did, didn't I?"

"I don't know for sure, Denole," Mr. Potter said and pushed his glasses into place. "Do you remember where you were when you were writing it?"

"I was in the kitchen and I could swear I put it in my bag," Mrs. Potter said then whisked out her wand. " _Accio_ shopping list!"

Moments later, it came zooming out of James's pocket; the Potter heir looked rigid with guilt as his mother glared daggers at him. Remus shot James a questioning glance that did not go amiss.

"James Cicero Potter. Why did you have my list? You weren't trying to change some of your things, were you?" Mrs. Potter said in a dangerously low voice.

"No, Mum," James said automatically, hanging his head. "I wasn't technically trying to change some of my things...I was just...trying to change some of... _our_ things, yeah?" He trailed off awkwardly.

"What am I going to do with you? James, all you want is Quidditch, Quidditch, Quidditch. What about your real academics? What are you going to be when you graduate? That is only a few years!" Mrs. Potter said, making her husband shift awkwardly from foot to foot. It was clear who did the yelling in the Potter residence.

"I'm not all about Quidditch, Mum," James muttered to his feet. "I am into other stuff, as well."

"Denole, being into Quidditch is not a sin—"

"Stay out of this, Cicero!" Mrs. Potter said and rounded on her only son. "So apprise me, what is this 'other stuff' you have shown interest in?"

James looked at his mother; at least he had the decency to look awkward and shameful. But suddenly at the thought of what else he had suddenly become passionate about made his eyes brighten considerably.

"I want to be an Auror," James said proudly. "That is what Sirius and I are going to go for when we graduate. Right, Sirius?"

"Absolutely, Mrs. Potter," Sirius said and folded his hands. "James even suggested last year we go talk to Professor McGonagall and she said with the grades we are receiving, we are well on our way to becoming Aurors."

"Did she now?" Mrs. Potter said thoughtfully, letting her hackles fall. "I am impressed by you two. I suppose I stand corrected."

James shot Sirius a grateful look and the room suddenly felt much less tense than it just had been not two minutes ago. Mrs. Potter scanned over her list one last time before tucking it away in her pocket and striding across the room to pick up a small clay pot of gray powder.

"Who's first?" she asked. "Sirius, dear? Do you want to head on over there first?"

"Sure," Sirius said and accepted the little bowl from James's mother. With a wink to his friends, Sirius threw down the powder. "Diagon Alley!"

The gray powder ignited the familiar emerald flames that caused Sirius to spin out of control; when the flames died down, Mrs. Potter stepped up and held out the bowl for the next person.

"Remus?" she asked and gestured towards him. "Do you want to go next?"

Remus nodded in agreement, took a handful of powder, and threw it down. "Diagon Alley!"

He, too, was spinning out of control. It was the second last time looking at James's great room. He tucked in his elbows and waited till he spotted the right gate. His head was spinning so fast and he was getting so dizzy, he nearly missed it. But when he saw Sirius jumping up and down, he stumbled out of the fireplace.

"Remus!" Sirius said, still bouncing.

"What?" the other asked and sat up. "Why are you jumping?"

Just as he finished his question, Sirius stopped jumping and fished out some candy in a bag. The label read something about Jumping Crickets but the label was torn and Sirius was still giddy from whatever he just ingested.

"What did you eat now?" Remus asked, ignoring the fact that he nearly swore. "What is that stuff? Who gave it to you?"

"It was a free sample of their newest candy and I wanted to try it," Sirius muttered under his breath. "I was just curious. Where are the others, anyway? How long have we been waiting for them?"

"We just got here," Remus pointed out.

At that precise time, the fireplace roared and James came stumbling out of it ashes a moment later,. Then a moment after that, Peter came after James, shaking the soot from his blonde hair.

"Are we all here?" Mrs. Potter asked, placing a hand on James's shoulder. "You're father is coming but a bit later. Listen, we need to go to Flourish and Blotts, Madam Malkin's Robes For All Occasions, Amanuensis Quills, and you want to go to Quality Quidditch Supplies. We are busy, let's get started."

"Mum, you can get your stuff and we'll get ours. Besides, we all need to go to Eeylops Owls Emporium; we need owl treats," James said and patted his mother on the shoulder in a soothing way. "Why don't you get that tea of yours and do your own shopping? It won't take us too long."

"Promise?" she asked, looking at her son. "And if anything happens, there is a section in the law that states you can use magic even if you are underage in life threatening situations."

"Thanks, Mum," James said again. "I think we'll be okay."

The party split off in different directions and Remus was able to admire Diagon Alley for the first time. He never had the chance to look at the little wizarding town at night so he particularly enjoyed looking at how the lights in the store were able to light the cobblestone streets. It was also strange to see the streets completely empty. The one place Mrs. Potter had magically barricaded off was the entrance to Knockturn Alley.

"It's like she doesn't even trust us," James said and shook his head.

"Were you planning on shopping down there?" Remus asked, raising an eyebrow questioningly.

James's lack of an answer was enough of an answer for Remus. The four friends hurried into Flourish and Blotts first; the manager beamed at his customers and beckoned them forward.

"Welcome to Flourish and Blotts, you four. It is good to see you again..and for the fifth time in a row," the manager said in an excited voice. "I think we have your books all ready. Ed? Did you get them stacked?"

The Marauders turned around to see another worker, who evidently went by the name of Ed, waving a broom around, aiming it towards the ceiling then scoping along the walls.

"They're in the back," Ed said and nodded to the back room. "I have them stacked and even labeled by name, boss."

"Thank you," the manager said and hurried into the back office. He emerged with four piles of books. "These are yours, I believe."

"Thanks," Remus said and shoved all of his textbooks into his book bag. He turned to Ed. "Excuse me, sir. What are you doing with that broomstick?"

Ed stopped waving it around to face Remus. He rubbed his eyes wearily and ran a hand through his hair. Evidently it was not a good story for the manager also heaved a great sigh of impatience.

"We ordered three stocks of The Invisible Book Of Invisibility. Who knew the books would become invisible? Well, it cost us a fortune and we can't find them, now. I told Ed to keep looking because we never sold a single copy."

"Not one of our smartest ideas," Ed agreed.

They exited Flourish and Blotts and just as they were closing the door, they could hear a loud _crack_ which indicated that someone just left. The next place they went was Amanuensis Quills; a place that sold the best quills and the coolest colored ink bottles.

"Welcome to Amanuensis Quills," the manager said and beamed. "We are having a sale on eagle feather quills and a muggle invention called fountain pens. Would you care to see what they are like?"

"Fountain pens, eh?" Sirius said and turned to Remus. "Isn't that what you had before?"

"Yeah; I still have it," Remus said and nodded at the pen. "I just need different ink."

The Marauders still watched the fountain pen demonstration and no one could ever deny its coolness. The ink flowed so nicely and the pen, itself, looked so attractive. But they declined the really good offer and stuck to the standard quills.

"These are still a good choice," the manager insisted. "Tell Denole to stop by for a quick moment and tell Cicero it is good to hear he is finally taking a break from his office. That one deserves a break."

"Will do," James said reassuringly.

"Oh—is Cicero coming this morning?" the manager asked, pushing up his glasses. "I have some information I am sure he would want to hear about the massive planned breakout—"

The manager stopped in mid sentence and cursed. "I should not have said that. I should not have said that."

"No," James said, suddenly sounding a lot more unlike himself. "No, you shouldn't have because now you have to tell me. Son of a very good Auror, I am curious."

"Careful, James," Peter warned. "He's definitely not the manager of this shop..."

"Hang on," Remus said, allowing his heightened sense to take over and his good memory. "I recognize you. Aren't you an Avery? I recognize you from the time you were with Greyback—"

"Lupin?"

"Avery? James, it's Avery. The one who tortured that muggle family!" Remus snarled, fishing through his pocket for his wand. "Oh no."

And it seemed as if the god of light, himself, came down and blinded them all for the entire room was lit up from the number of spells and curses that were being cast about the shop. Amanuensis Quills looked as if it had been set ablaze and if it were not for the number of shop keepers from around Diagon Alley throwing spell after spell at the shop.

The Marauders, who never touched their wands, were dragged out and encircled into a large group. The shop keepers closed around them with their wands out and their teeth bared.

"What was that?" one demanded.

"Because we would do that at a quill shop," Remus snarled, bristling. "It was Avery—the one who tortured that muggle family just two weeks ago. He must of needed money or something in Diagon Alley because he was here and definitely acting suspicious."

"And are you sure you aren't framing him for something you did, Lupin?" the same one retorted, eyeing him warily.

"What would I need besides quills for school?" Remus snapped, his hackles rising. "I am not the enemy here. Someone—one of you three—help me out here."

"No, Remus is right," Sirius said immediately. "I recognized Avery, too. And I would have done something about him but he set the bloody place on fire and disapparated. It'd be your fault if you do not believe us."

Mr. and Mrs. Potter came running towards them, breaking through the circle of wizards, and embraced each child. Mr. Potter, looking livid, turned on their oppressors. The shop keepers evidently all respect Mr. Potter for they bowed their heads and exposed their necks in submission.

"Why are you after these kids? Leave them alone, I tell you. I am Cicero Potter, an Auror for the Minister of Magic and once his personal guard. You interrogate these kids like they are the reason these crimes are being committed. What would they know?"

"I'm sorry, sir," the same one that Remus was bickering with said. "I was just taking precautionary measures."

"Against my these kids? Never you mind, clear out!" Mr. Potter said and started waving his wand. Instantly, the building started to repair itself. Cicero turned to Mrs. Potter. "I am going back into the office again. I am afraid I can't see James off."

The Marauders heard this and three of them subtly turned to watch the reaction of the fourth. James kept a very stoic face and did not move a muscle until Mr. Potter came striding over to him.

"I'm sorry, James. I'm going to say goodbye to you now," Mr. Potter said and gripped his son's shoulder. "And I want you to know that I hope you have a wonderful year. Take care of yourself but take care of your friends. Friendship is important at times like this."

"I know," James said, sounding very indifferent. "Will I be seeing you at Christmas?"

"I am going to be out of the country for office work," Mr. Potter said and pulled James into an embrace. "Be smart, James. I will write to you often. I await your returning owl."

"Dad," James said, pulling back and looking at his father. "I'll see you sometime, right?"

"Of course you will. Be easy on your mother," Mr. Potter said and patted James on the back. "Good boy. Have a good year, all of you."

Mr. Potter took turns shaking hands with all of James's friends before heading off to find his wife one last time before he would depart. James watched his father all the way until he was no longer in sight. Remus was beginning to get that hunch where this actually happens often and suddenly he felt worse for assuming the Potter residence was that picture perfect family.

James pursed his lips then shook out of his daze and turned back to his friends. "Mum, what now? We still have to get our stuff."

"But I don't really want you here," Mrs. Potter said and frowned deeply. "What am I going to do with you four? I can't just leave you unattended, of course. I think we should head back. I'll owl you the rest of your supplies, James—"

"Mum, we'll be okay," James insisted and shook his head. "Do you see how many people came out to see what happened back there? I think we are all pretty well protected."

"But there are no Aurors around, anymore," Mrs. Potter protested and checked her wrist watch. "Your father took them all when Avery fled. James, I really want you four home."

"Mum," James said very patiently. "We are going to be fine. We are surrounded by people who are very experienced with their defensive skills. We'll be fine; we won't go into shops with people we do not recognize. I promise; plus, we are almost..ish done."

Mrs. Potter gave in and sighed, allowing the boys to finish their shopping. They still had Eeylops Owl Emporium, Madam Malkin's Robes For All Occasions, and Quality Quidditch Supplies. For the briefest of moments, they stood around each other in (an almost) protective circle.

"Are we resuming our shopping?" James said and quirked an eyebrow.

"Oh, right, right," Sirius muttered, shaking his head clear. "Okay, okay. We have our books and quills. We should probably get some owl treats like you said we needed. Do we all have the mandatory potions ingredients on that list?"

"You're all good," Peter said and waved his hand. "So are we heading to Eeylops Owl Emporium?

The Marauders took a right turn and made their way over to the popular shop. Immediately upon entering, Remus could smell every animal (especially with his heightened sense of smell). His eyes turned immediately to the cats upon the wall. Their cages were right against the windows, which allowed them to admire the view of outside.

"You're not planning on eating them, are you?" James asked teasingly, rolling his eyes.

"How'd you know?" Remus quipped happily. "I just can't help myself! Which one should I have first?"

James cachinnated loudly and patted Remus on the shoulder. "I didn't know you had any werewolfy humor. I swear, I didn't know I could joke around with you about it."

"Yeah, and then I realized I have been friends with you lot for about five years, give or take a few days, and it's not going away," Remus said with a shrug. "So I might as well get used to it now."

"That's the spirit," Sirius said with a wink. "Anyway, I think we might have something that could help you out, you know—"

"Found it," Peter said loudly, catching on to James's glare. "I found the owl treats. Is that what we want, yeah?"

Peter, the ever-saving life saver, came to the rescue without looking suspicious to Remus. James rushed over, giving Peter a subtle thumbs-up, and grabbed three things of treats, each for an owl owner.

"Thanks," Remus said and looked around some more.

He could see a number of different owls sitting happily in hanging cages. On a perch, he could see a fruit bat. Caged next to the bat was a falcon, that was tearing into its meal. Next to that was a regal eagle that was grooming its feathers.

"Hello?" the manager called out softly.

The Marauders made themselves visible and waved as the manager called them all over. The manager was a smaller woman who looked gentle and kind yet fierce and strict. She had her hair up and she was surveying them carefully.

"Who was that in Amanuensis Quills?" she asked.

"Avery," Sirius said and slapped on a grin. "He was the one who tortured that muggle family; it was in the Daily Prophet a week ago."

"That's right," she said and frowned. "I heard about that, oh the poor family. Those poor children! I hope he serves his warranted time in Azkaban; these are dark times, eh, dark times. And it only seems the heinousness is only getting worse."

She paused then continued:

"But I bet Dumbledore knows what to do about this. That man always has a plan for he is brilliant. There is no safer place than Hogwarts; you are safe under his watch."

"That's what we all think," Peter said.

They made their purchases and made their way to Madam Malkin's Robes For All Occasions. Sirius was determined to get new dress robes for the ones he had were dark green, which he thought symbolized Slytherin way too much. But there was no denying the fact that Walburga had that tailored for him especially like that. With diamond studded buttons that were an eerie silver and the fabric a dark green, there was no mistaking it.

"I can see why you'd want another," Madam Malkin said and pulled at Sirius's sleeve. "Hold still, Mr. Black. I need to take your measurements and I can't when you're constantly moving around."

"Sorry," Sirius said and suddenly fell completely still. "Sorry, but I was hoping for something with—"

"Golden buttons and a golden trace with a red accent?" Madam Malkin finished, making Sirius beam.

"You read my mind," Sirius said happily.

Madam Malkin was able to get Sirius's measurements, design and sew a new pair of dress robes, and even fashioned him a tiny golden lion on the inside trim of his dress robes, right where his breast pocket would be.

"Thanks," Sirius said meaningfully. "That means a lot."

When they finished their robe shopping, the lot of them made their way into Quality Quidditch Supplies. The shop was filled with everything James and Sirius wanted but their trip to the shop last year satisfied their real need for equipment. Sirius got a better Beater's bat and James got better gloves.

"I don't think there's much in here," James said then picked something off the shelf. "A polisher, eh? Do you want to split this, mate?"

"Sure," Sirius said and extracted the amount in total. "But let me pay for this one. I've been mooching off of you for ages."

It turned out both of them payed an equal amount for the polish, which was equally split. The Marauders, after a rather stressful morning of shopping, came home at 3:00 am and they were ready to crawl into bed.

Mrs. Potter went to bed, that morning, alone but the lot of them went to sleep feeling pretty content. No vivid and nightmarish dreams to wake up or disturb Remus; the feeling of involvement to help Peter into a slumber; the wondrous feeling of friends kept Sirius smiling through the night; and the emotions of protectiveness for his friends kept James feeling strong.

But James and Sirius just had to say one more thing in unison:

"What about our welcome back prank?"

Peter snickered and Remus groaned.


	3. III: Lectures on Life

**All rights remain.**

"Wait, wait," James said, throwing his hands up. "Who is Prefect this year?"

"I dunno," Sirius replied first, shrugging a shoulder for emphasis. "Some poor unfortunate bloke. Although, it would be nice to throw all those Slytherins into detention—"

"Sirius, you cannot abuse your power as Prefect. That is the polar opposite reason why someone would be chosen as Prefect," Remus chided, scowling all the same.

"But it would be nice to have a Prefect on our side," Peter pointed out thoughtfully. "Think about it. We would have that advantage."

The Marauders were sitting in their favorite compartment on the Hogwarts Express, their trunks stowed away and their book bags tucked close beside them. Despite James's lack of a father sending him off for his fifth year at Hogwarts, James was chipper and happy. He was glad his mother was there to say goodbye to him and wish him a good year. Sirius was grateful that he missed his mother, father, and brother at the station. It saved him a load of trouble and grief; he was just being grateful that he did not have to face his family.

The boys were growing up fast and their fifth year was approaching sooner than they would have expected. With their heads up high, they were more than ready to start a new year. So naturally, the first thing that came to their mind was their infamous pranks. As soon as they mentioned pranks, Sirius brought up the topic of Prefects and that is how The Marauders were talking about the new Prefects.

And that was when Remus remembered he was late for his meeting.

"Oh!" Remus exclaimed and leaped to his feet. "I've got to go!"

"Go where?" Sirius asked, knitting his eyebrows in confusion.

"And that reminds me," James said and looked at his wrist watch. "I'd expect Bernard to be Captain now that Emmanuel graduated. I am going to try and find our Quidditch Captain."

He stood up and slid the compartment door open and stood aside, looking at Remus expectantly.

"Didn't you say you had somewhere to be?" James asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Right, sorry," Remus said, shaking his head clear.

James and Remus departed, leaving Sirius and Peter to a game of wizard's chess. The two of them were content on walking in silence until Remus was forced to make the turn that would take him to the Prefect Compartment. This rose suspicion and James's eyebrow and Remus could feel himself go very red and suddenly, the air felt much warmer.

"You're it?" James asked, his eyebrows definitely shooting towards the ceiling. "You're the _Prefect_? Why did you not tell us this before? How could you wait to tell us something as important as this?"

"Oh, relax. It is not like you would not have figured it out. Besides, it was not the first thing on my mind but I got the badge when I got my Hogwarts letter. No one bothered to ask or anything or show any interest..." Remus said with a shrug as he casually trailed off from his sentence.

"This is big—no—this is huge! Wait until Sirius and Peter hear about this; they'll fall out of their seats! Wait, did you tell them you were Prefect and just kept it from me?" James asked, pointing at accusing finger at Remus. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Did you?"

"No," Remus said and rolled his eyes, making sure that bit was noticeable. "Listen, mate. I am already late to this meeting so I would appreciate it if you would let me head on in there."

"Nonsense," James said, flapping his hands and slid past Remus. "Let us see who is your lucky partner in crime."

With that, James pushed the compartment door open and spread his arms out wide as if he was expecting a large group hug. Instead, he found the compartment nearly empty save for one person. Said person was pacing around the room, hair swishing around and looking angry, constantly checking her watch. Red hair, sharp green eyes, tight movements, Remus knew exactly who he was looking at.

" _Evans_?" James asked, shooting up straight.

" _Potter_?" Lily snarled and her eyes widened in shock. "No, that is not possible. You are not Prefect. Get out of the compartment."

"Maybe I am Prefect," James said; for the first time ever, the bespectacled friend sounded defensive against the love of his life. "What if I am, Evans? You can't go around sounding like a brat if you are Prefect. That is setting a bad example."

"Hm, 'sounding like a brat'? Wow, that sounds a load like something you would do," Lily fired back and crossed her arms over her chest. "Who is the real Prefect because I know it is not you, Potter."

"It's me," Remus said and emerged, revealing himself to her. "I am the Prefect."

"Now that is much more believable," Lily said, completely ignoring James and turning her attention to Remus. "Where have you been? You missed the meeting. The meeting, itself, was not that important."

"What did I miss?" Remus asked frowning a bit. "Was it anything that wouldn't be known by common sense?"

"Not really," Lily said and leaned against the wall beside Remus. "I mean, there was the whole 'do not abuse the power' lecture some older Prefects told us or stuff like that. I would not say you missed much."

"Sounds fair," Remus said in good nature. "Anything other than that?"

"Not really; you have the right to the Prefect's bathroom on the fifth floor," Lily said.

James, who was scowling the whole time, thrust himself in between Remus and Lily and shunted Remus to the side. Contrary to popular belief, Remus found the whole ordeal very amusing and cracked a grin and chuckled but Lily was not having any of it. She seized Remus's hand and walked out pointedly with her hand clasped in his. James shouted something inaudible but he was lost by the time they rounded the corner.

And then something else occurred to Remus that he nearly completely forgot. It struck him like lightening and he could not believe he almost forgot to tell her. Just as he was opening his mouth to tell her, he slammed it shut and held his breath. Now, on the train, was certainly not the time to break the news to one of his favorite friends. He did not know how Lily would react to his lycanthropy and he wanted the train ride to be filled with her presence in case she bolts the other direction when he told her.

Lily was humming along to a song that he did not recognize, which made him even more nervous to talk to her. Of course, James would be another issue. He somehow had to ensure James that he and Lily were simply best friends and nothing more. Ignoring the little voice in his head telling him that it was he who kissed Lily in his fourth year, he tugged at Lily's hand.

"What?" she asked and turned to face him. "Are you going to tell me I was being too harsh on poor Potter's heart?"

"No, but if we are going to talk about James then I do want to bring something up," Remus said and turned uncharacteristically serious. "And I am actually going to say this with a serious expression, no pun intended."

"Oh God above," Lily said and rolled her brilliant eyes. "What is it now, Remus? Is it some kind of oath that you will stay pure with me or something to preserve you and Potter's friendship?"

"Close," Remus said and gave her the thumbs up. "I was thinking more along the lines of keeping this whole ordeal obvious that we are nothing more than friends. What do you say?"

"I think it is ridiculous," Lily said and stamped her foot, looking and sounding angry all over again. "I think you have the obligation of being friends with whomever you wish to be friends with. And I think you are entitled to engage in a relationship with whomever you want to. It is not up to Potter to decide that for you, Remus."

"That is very true," Remus said calmly and plunged on without really thinking. "But I am not interested in pursuing a relationship with anyone and I want James to know that I am not trying to claim you as mine or anything."

He knew he lost his word filter when Lily faltered. When she faltered, he faltered and it became a whole awkward mess that left them both in a very tense and uncomfortable silence that would not abate. Remus definitely knew he said something wrong for Lily disguised her hurt expression with a curious look to her cuticles that probably did not deserve that much attention from the fiery girl. Why was he always the one to say the completely wrong thing to every girl he liked? It was a curse. It was.

"All right," Remus said and slapped a palm to his forehead. "I know I just said something wrong. What did I just say? I know I just upset you and I feel awful for making you feel bad. Set me right, Lily."

"Nothing," Lily said quietly. "What you said was all completely true. I agree with you wholeheartedly. But must we always talk about James? What happened to our conversations, Remus?"

"They are still here," the werewolf replied then frowned again. "But Lily, there is something I kind of need to tell you and it is not really something to take lightly. It is a sit-down-and-tell-you kind of thing that I have to say."

"Is something wrong?" Lily asked, sounding very concerned. "I sense something is very wrong. Tell me."

"Lily, I can't. I cannot do it right now," Remus said but sent her a reassuring smile. "But I promise I will tell you when we get to the castle and we are alone."

"But we are alone," Lily protested.

"Not now," Remus said with a gentle shake of his head.

The two of them were patrolling the train's corridors already, making sure every student was following the rules and not getting into trouble. The two of them specifically stayed away from Remus's compartment in fear of setting off his friends. Lily agreed to their plan for she was not in the mood to feud with them nor did she really have the energy. The first years all looked excited and nervous at the same time. The Sorting Hat came up in the first year's conversations often.

"Do you remember our first year?" Lily asked quietly. "I was sitting next to Sev and I thought I absolutely hated him. It turns out that he is my best friend."

"Don't get me wrong, I think your friendship with Snape is pretty deep but what about ours?" Remus asked, half joking.

"Remus, you know I have a special place in my heart for you," Lily said with a laugh. "Our friendship holds a way different meaning than me and Sev's friendship. And that is another thing."

Remus raised an eyebrow at the different tone Lily was using. It was getting colder and firmer, angrier. Remus inclined his head towards her and listened intently as she spoke again:

"Potter will not leave Sev alone. I keep telling him to stop but he won't listen. Tell Potter that if he ever wants to get on my good side, tell him to change his personality completely and his attitude towards Severus."

"Lily, you know if I tell James to change his personality for you, he actually will," Remus said and shook his head firmly. "I will not tell my friend to change himself. Trust me, Lily. If James tried changing, it would be worse."

"Impossible," she said exasperatedly. "He is a hopeless person and it is a shame because he really isn't stupid. He just has too big of an ego to actually use his brain. Pity. He could have proven himself."

"Lily," Remus said in warning. "Let us talk about something else other than insulting my best mate."

"Fine but what do you want to talk about, Remus?" Lily asked, looking around.

The two of them found something they both wanted to talk about. They always enjoyed their conversations they had with one another; it was well into the afternoon by the time Remus and Lily sat down in the Prefect's compartment. By then, Remus was sure his friends destroyed at least something.

"I do have to go but I will see you at Hogwarts," Remus said and patted her hand. "I am going to see what the others have been up to but thanks for the company, Lily. That was fun."

"As always," Lily said with a dramatic bow. "Goodbye, Remus."

Remus turned back and made his way to his own compartment. There, he saw Sirius and Peter leaning against the compartment wall and sleeping. James was leaning against Sirius and for the first time it looked as if his friends did not break anything. Sliding in silently, he seated himself as far away from them and pulled out the book he was currently reading. But he only got to glimpse at it before James stirred.

"What time is it?" he grumbled, rubbing his eyes.

"It's around three in the afternoon, mate," Remus said and looked impressed. "You managed to make it through without lunch. That is a first. But you will be happy to know I have something for you."

"What did you get?" James asked and sat up, his tiredness disappearing.

"I brought you your mother's best sandwiches," Remus said and pulled out James his own. "I know you like these and your mother had a feeling you'd need them. What do you think?"

"I smell food," Sirius said, suddenly stirring from his slumber. "Is that those sandwiches I smell? If so, give me one."

Because Sirius was talking so loudly and stretched to the point where he accidentally kicked Peter, the fourth Marauder roused from his sleep and the four of them ate their lunches together. The sandwiches were so good, they barely uttered a word until the food was nearly all gone. Remus was the first to finish, then Sirius, then James, then Peter.

"What are we going to do now for the next several hours?" Sirius asked and yawned hugely. "I was in the middle of a great dream."

"Was the sandwich worth getting up?" James asked, brushing the crumbs off his clothes.

"Absolutely," Sirius replied.

The latter sat back in silence until James threw Remus an impish look and waggled his eyebrows. Remus, knowing exactly what James was thinking, groaned and suppressed rolling his eyes in agitation.

"If you won't say it, I will," James chirped happily and nudged Sirius. "Go on, go on and tell them."

"Fine," Remus said and shrugged. "Sirius, Peter, I am a Prefect and Lily Evans is the other. I did not tell you right away because it was not the first thing on my mind and with what was going on, it was not the most important thing."

Sirius and Peter's jaws dropped open in surprise and their eyes widened.

"How could you not tell us something as important as Prefect?" Sirius screeched and pointed an accusing finger at the werewolf. "Blasphemous! I demand to know these kinds of things exactly when they happen! This is not fair!"

"I know, mate," James said with a dramatic sigh. "I was thinking the same thing."

"Hmm, Remus as Prefect, eh?" Sirius murmured to himself. "Remus as Prefect...this could mean something, you lot. This could mean something here! Think about it! We have authority on our side!"

James grinned but Remus frowned deeply.

"I will not abuse my power as a Prefect for your mere amusement. I will not punish innocent students for your own pleasure of watching Slytherins getting the short end of the stick."

"We completely congratulate you getting the badge and everything," Peter said with a nod. "We all kind of knew it would be you who would get the badge. We knew it was always going to be you...seeing that you are the most behaved out of us and all..."

"But think about it, Remy," Sirius said and grasped Remus's wrist. "Think about all the Slytherins we could mess with. There is going to be no doubt the Slytherin Prefects will be after us."

"If that occurs without a sensible reason, then I will retaliate back with my Prefect powers but not before that," Remus said sternly and literally put his foot down. "I will not have my badge stripped from me—"

"That has never happened but hey, there is a first for everything—"

"I do not fancy being the first person to get their Prefect duties taken away from them," Remus deadpanned and feigned a serious expression. "So I am not participating in said pranks."

"I cannot believe this," Sirius said and actually went to hug Remus. "You are a ruddy Prefect! This is incredible! This is magnificent! This is spectacular! This is wondrous! Remus is Prefect, we can get away with so much!"

"No you won't," Remus said sternly, throwing a nasty glare at his reckless friend. "I will punish you if I have to."

"Really?" Sirius tested, quirking an eyebrow. "Say I did something...against the rules tonight. What, as Prefect, will you do?"

"Get mad," Remus said and flipped Sirius off. "I dare you to test me, mate."

"Worry not, young friend. Your dare is taken very seriously."

Remus rolled his eyes but both knew how much Sirius loved to quip and it was not often that he sounded a bit too boorish at times when doing so. Everyone, including Remus, knew The Marauders were bound to get in trouble (no one knew just how much). But Remus knew he was probably not going to do much to prevent it. It was the sad but honest truth.

.oOo.

"Blimey, how much longer?"

The fun was starting to wear off and the excitement was starting to feel less and less noticeable. The train ride was somehow draining them of their energy and by the time it was late at night, they were sprawled out on the compartment seats, leaning against one another as backrests.

"I am exhausted," Peter admitted and started to close his eyes. "I am not here to ruin the moment but I think we should change into our uniform."

"Peter, we are supposed to do a load of things but do we really ever do them?" James asked, sitting up slightly. "I mean, do we really because I can tell you right now we really don't."

Despite James's healthy (and quite frankly truthful) protest, The Marauders picked out their robes from their trunks and drew the blind down on the compartment door's window and started slipping on their uniform. Remus, who was usually the most self-conscious of them all, even managed to quickly change in front of everyone.

When they finished, they all looked to Remus's chest for on it gleamed the glorious Prefect badge. He wore it proudly but subtly, almost as if he did not want people to know he had some kind of power over the others. Remus could feel his friends looking at his badge so he puffed out his chest a little more and smirked wildly.

"What do you think?" Remus asked.

"You look like a true Prefect," James said and gave Remus the thumbs up.

But to their surprise, Remus sighed and deflated, jabbing a finger at the badge with a frown. This did not go unnoticed by his friends and they frowned right along with their troubled friend.

"What is wrong?" Peter asked, leaning forward a little.

"You're right," Remus said and gestured to James and Sirius. "I probably won't be able to stop you from your stupid pranks and recklessness. I do not know why Professor Dumbledore gave me this stupid badge."

"Mate, I am not going to lie; we will most likely still get into loads of trouble and you will not do anything about it but at least we all know you were the lucky chosen one to get that badge right there. Notice how no one else got it? Professor Dumbledore knew you could handle it. That is why he chose you," Sirius said wisely and nodded in reassurance.

"For once, you actually sounded reasonable," Remus said and leaped to his feet. "I am also worried how Lily will react when I tell her I am a werewolf. I dunno if she is going to be disgusted by that or what..."

"If she is, I'll clock her in the face and tell her she needs her judgement checked," Sirius said but James shook his head.

"We are not going to knock out my future wife," James said and shoved Sirius lightly. "But we are definitely going to do something if that be the case. We will just show her awesome you are despite your furry little problem."

"This 'furry little problem' might come up as a shock or insult to her," Remus said and buried his face in his hands. "I cannot lose this badge, I just got it and not even officially."

"Relax, will you?" Peter said and grabbed Remus by the arm and seated him down by him. "Will you just relax?"

"I am relaxed," Remus said stiffly and tensed when Peter poked his arm. "But how do you tell someone you are a werewolf? How the bloody hell do you tell someone something like that? That's it, I am not telling her. I am going to turn in this stupid privilege. It is not worth me losing hair color."

"I know, you are graying in some hairs already—look, I can see a gray right now—" Sirius began.

"Now is not the time!" Remus said and slapped Sirius's hand away. "Okay, where is Lily. I have to tell her I am resigning and that I can no longer bring up the responsibilities—"

"Do not do that," James warned and suddenly turned uncharacteristically serious. "There are a few things I have learned about Evans. She does not like quitters, she does not want to associate with quitter."

"What are you saying? And how do you know?" Remus asked suspiciously.

"I am saying if you quit, she will dislike you even more. And I know this because I know Evans more than you lot give me credit for. I know she is persistent. Perhaps that is the reason why I have not yet given up hope for her and me," James said, sounding wise.

"You can do it," Sirius said, nodding sincerely.

That little bit of confidence was enough for Remus to get by with.

.oOo.

"I can't believe we are actually here!" Sirius said and grinned like a madman. "Look at Hogwarts! It is absolutely brilliant, especially at night! I cannot believe this is actually a thing! We're here!"

"I know right!" James exclaimed and moved to look through the window.

Remus and Peter stayed back a ways and admired the way their friends could suddenly stop acting like arrogant students during a moment of genuine excitement. Both James and Sirius were sounding like them true selves, not like the pompous people they tended to act like when others were around. It was a sudden but nice change in their attitude that Remus could get used to.

"What kind of stunts are we going to pull on Snivellus when we get there?" Sirius wondered, nudging James with his elbow.

"The list is endless, mate," James replied and flashed a grin in Sirius's direction.

"That is exactly what I want to hear," Sirius said and frowned deeply. "After what Snivellus did, I would expect an answer like that."

James nodded and patted Sirius on the shoulder in a gesture of comfort and understanding. Sirius welcomed the gesture and threw a grin at James, almost as if the two were speaking with telepathy. Remus and Peter exchanged glances that held their own meaning to it.

But all of Remus's other thoughts simply flew out the window as soon as he could see the brightly lit castle in the distance. They _were_ almost there and he was expected to tell Lily Evans his deepest secret. It was an unnerving thought and he could definitely wait to tell her. Peter, sensing Remus's worries, gave him a reassuring grip on the shoulder.

"It's an amazing place to be," Remus agreed and sighed heavily.

The train's whistle sounded the close departure; they could hear other students getting excited because the sound of voices rose in eagerness. The train lurched to a slower pace for a good ten minutes. When the train came to a complete stop, The Marauders gathered their belongings and headed off first. Being the first ones to step off the train, they were able to get a good look around.

The train stop was hard to see for it was completely dark. However, they could definitely see and hear Hagrid, the Hogwarts Game Keeper, yelling over the noise of the students, directing the first years to the boats.

Remus could not suppress a snicker. As one of their pranks, they messed with the first years whilst riding on thestrals. It was one of their better pranks...Remus felt reluctant to admit it but it was true. Even he could not argue that.

"To the carriages?" James asked, readjusting his book strap. "We can be the first ones."

The Marauders climbed aboard on the first carriage and the "invisible" thestrals took off, trotting at a steady pace. The sight of the castle threw memories at Remus like a brick. He could not help but wonder what their fifth year would be like after he recapped everything that happened in their fourth year. Then Remus started remembering all the people he had vivid memories of.

"Remus, stop thinking. It's exhausting me," Sirius jested and nudged Remus with his arm. "What is with you? Is something wrong?"

"No," Remus said with a shake of his head. "I am just...thinking, yeah. But it was nothing bad."

"Sit back and relax, Remus," Sirius said and grinned. "We're back."

"And we have no time to mess around this year. We have O. ," Remus muttered and heaved a great sigh. "That should be so enjoyable."

"No worries," Sirius said and held up a hand. "Before you give yourself more gray hairs, James and I already conducted a plan and Peter is going to make sure we stick through it."

"What is it?" Remus asked, dreading the answer.

"We are going to start studying for the O. early so we aren't cramming them in at the end," Sirius said proudly and James applauded for emphasis.

"That's excellent," Remus said and beamed. "I am proud of you for making that decision. Now, if you could keep that going, I would be even more proud of you."

"He likes the idea," Sirius said to James and Peter in a singsong voice. "I think we'll be in for a good year. Right, Prefect Remy?"

"Absolutely!"


	4. IV: Reassurance for Confession

**All rights remain.**

"Welcome..."

Students from all around the room looked towards the one who was speaking.

"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts."

There was some cheering and some clapping. There was definitely some smiles and hugs that went all around the room.

"First years, we welcome you!"

The students all turned to the first years gathered at the head of the Great Hall. Some, Remus noticed, ducked their heads at being acknowledged for the entire school and others looked rather haughty and proud to be in the spotlight.

"The Sorting Hat has never been wrong. First years will now be sorted into their houses. These houses will be like your family. Treat them well."

Professor McGonagall stepped up to the single stool at the front of the four large and long tables. She cleared her throat and pulled out a long scroll that had all the names of the first years.

"Lucas King!"

A tall boy with brown hair and a muscular build stood up and strutted towards the chair. He sat down with ease and waited for the hat to be placed on his head. He had that sort of jocular appearance but who could also look very serious and intimidating.

"Hufflepuff!"

Lucas King walked off the stage and gave the Hufflepuffs smiles and nods of acknowledgement.

"Diane Brine!"

A delicate looking girl with sculpted cheekbones that looked like a Greek goddess's cheekbones stepped up to the front. She had curly black hair and was as pale as the moon. She had vivid green eyes that could not be overlooked.

"Ravenclaw!"

She went to the Ravenclaw table looking a bit relieved and very happy.

"Leonard Aegis!"

A boy with dark brown hair and tanned skin walked towards the hat. He had a sort of air about him that made him look proud yet calm demeanor and he had the physique of a powerful figure.

"Gryffindor!"

The Marauders, like the entire table, stood up and clapped in welcome. Leonard looked pleased and went to sit with his new family. He was receiving high fives and pats on the back and shoulders all around.

"Alexander Cascedeur!"

Another boy that looked like a natural leader stepped forward and took his place on the stool. His black hair was covered by the hat. The students (from the tables as well) were calling him "Ares" the Greek god of war. Alexander looked like he had been through everything.

"Gryffindor!"

The entire table hollered with glee when Alexander came forth and sat at their table. He was stoic when he shook hands with those who extended a hand. He eyed them all with a calculating look that could cut through steel.

"Jonathan Santos!"

Remus watched as a boy with the most striking kind of features stood up and walked towards the Sorting Hat. He had a wild look to him that made people think he would be a rebel. He had wheatish yet grayish hair and striking dark eyes. His demeanor, however, looked much more jovial.

"Slytherin!"

The Slytherins were clapping along and welcoming their new addition to the table. The Gryffindors watched silently and the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were both eyeing the other table cautiously.

"Larena Pirouette!"

This girl might have been one of the prettiest girls Remus had ever seen and would have totally mistaken her as a goddess, too. With her white hair held back and her eyes looking forward, she looked like a descendant of Aphrodite.

"Hufflepuff!"

The Hufflepuffs roared and Larena walked towards her new house, beaming and looking very happy.

"Fiona Selene!"

A girl, Remus was totally struck by, came forth and seated herself down. She had tanned skin and the most interesting long red hair he had ever seen. Her red hair had to be orange, yellow, and a least three different shades of red that ranged from fire red, to maroon, to a burgundy. It went down to her back and rested at her waist.

"Ravenclaw!"

Fiona hopped from the stool, hair and all, and rushed over to the Ravenclaws. They were all cheering and clapping and some even stretched over to run their hands through her magnificent hair.

"Charlie Eurynome!"

A gentle looking boy with light brown hair came forth and sat on the stool. He had an air of elegance and kindness to him that Remus always wanted himself to be like.

"Ravenclaw!"

He went to join the table that was on its feet and cheering all over again, surely making the caring boy feel welcomed.

"Iduna Zephyros!"

This girl was a very tall girl that had very long black hair. She looked silent, almost as if she rarely talked.

"Hufflepuff!"

She smiled quietly as she silently stepped off the stool and towards the happy students that were cheering and clapping.

"Ceres Aphaia!"

A tall boy with a sturdy build came up with a grin on his face. Remus had the impression that the boy looked very down-to-earth. He looked as if nothing could hinder his easy going nature.

"Gryffindor!"

When the entire sorting was finished, Remus was beginning to feel the effects of being hungry. Professor Dumbledore came back up to his podium and spread his arms out wide.

"Before we start eating ourselves away, I would like to introduce you to the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. Please welcome Professor Rauni."

A tall man with dusty red brown hair stood up and gave a bow. His robes were red instead of black and his tanned skin gleamed under the candlelight. Professor Rauni looked as unpredictable as lightening.

"Let the feast begin."

With that, there was a collective gasp as the entire Great Hall lit with delicious looking food. Remus could see mashed potatoes, chicken, sizzling steak, and all kinds of food lining the Gryffindor table.

"Hey, Ceres!" Sirius said to the first year who was only two people down from him. "What do you think of Hogwarts so far?"

"I only just started but it's something," Ceres said and grinned. "But I can't wait to start Transfiguration. It is my favorite subject by far. My brother made it sound divine. What is it like?"

"Transfiguration is taught by Professor McGonagall so make sure you get on her good side. Take good notes because she goes fast but it is really fun. What about your wand, Ceres?" James, who was the one to speak (and not Remus). He nodded at Ceres's wand that was on the table.

"Oh!" Ceres said and lifted his wand. "It was made for Transfiguration. Mr. Ollivander knew I was going to be a good student in that course. But you know, 'the wand chooses the wizard'."

"And Alexander," Remus said, turning to the other first year beside him. "What do you think will be your favorite subject?"

"Contrary to popular belief, I think Defense Against the Dark Arts is my best subject," Alexander said boldly. "I am interested in how to defend others."

"Is that why people call you Ares?" Remus asked curiously, knitting his eyebrows.

"Sort of," Alexander said and shrugged. "My name, itself, always is associated with powerful leaders—not dictators."

"So, why do people call you Ares?" Remus inquired.

"Ares is a powerful figure...and many think I am as well," Alexander said and looked at Remus directly in the eye. "I have always taken leadership over many things in order to preserve what I can."

"I see," Remus said and nodded in understanding.

"And I see you are Prefect," Alexander said, his sharp eyes glued to the badge on his chest.

Remus nodded and shifted so the badge was out of view.

James, on the other hand, was conversing with a new first year named Valkrist. She was a wise young girl. She had something that celtic about her that he could not put a finger on. Remus honed his enhanced hearing to see what James was talking about.

"It is not so much barbaric as it is necessary."

"But it is a fool's errand to think you should destroy the leader," Valkrist said with a shake of her elegant head. "In order to really end someone, you have to take down their followers."

"What happens when a leader is destroyed?" James challenged.

"The followers will continue to do what their leader had started," Valkrist insisted. "You always take down the followers for what is a leader without their followers? The odds have turned and they no longer can destroy anything if they do not have supporters."

James frowned deeply and studied Valkrist carefully as if he had seen her for the first time. She, unnerved at her superb arguing skills, continued to eat as if her wise old words meant nothing to her.

James turned to Remus and mouthed "wow" to him and pointed, with his head, at the girl sitting next to him. Remus chuckled and nodded in understanding. Suddenly, James almost looked as interested in Valkrist as he was with Lily Evans.

The feast was nearly done and Remus could feel the food he ate coming back up his throat as soon as he saw Lily beckoning him over. He swallowed and cautiously stood up, throwing one last look at his three friends before moving over to Lily. James caught sight of this and for once, his eyes were not glued on Lily. He nodded reassuringly towards Remus and smiled calmly.

That seemed to calm Remus down but he was very fidgety when he stepped up to her left. Lily, noticing this and everything else, knit her eyebrows in confusion and a inquiry lingering on her lips.

"Shall we?" Remus asked, gesturing with an arm to the first years. "We can take them the long way around to avoid everyone else, yeah? And we can do our introduction when everyone isn't crowding around the Fat Lady."

"Absolutely," Lily said and nodded in agreement. "The password is Iris."

"Okay," Remus said quietly, not quite looking at her. He turned to the first years before Lily had a chance of pointing this out on him. "First years! If you would follow us..."

The first years, who already gained respect for Remus, followed up in a single file line behind him and Lily. The two Prefects took their first years the longer way that included going down several different halls that was definitely unnecessary. Subtly, very subtly, Lily touched Remus's wrist in a comforting way for she could tell something was bothering her friend.

"As you all notice, there are a load of halls in this castle; it is perfectly normal to get lost around here," Remus said, raising his arms away from Lily but disguising it as a grand gesture. "All you have to do is ask these paintings were to go."

The first years peered closer to the walls and Remus stepped up to one and saluted the old gentleman in the picture. The first years started shoving and pushing their way to get a better view.

"Bonjour, Monsieur de Jean," Remus said kindly. "Could you help direct us to the Gryffindor Tower?"

"Certainly," Monsieur de Jean said and pointed to the right. "Just down the rest of this hallway and when you see the painting of the elephant, you take a left. When you pass the picture of the glass shoe, take another left. That should take you directly to the main staircase."

"Merci beaucoup, Monsieur de Jean," Remus said and started walking in the designated direction. "Do you see how these paintings can help you?"

The first years followed the two Prefects and sure enough, at the picture of the elephant, Remus turned left. They headed down another hallway and when he saw the glass shoe, he turned another left. Just like Monsieur de Jean said, there was the familiar staircase that led them to the Fat Lady.

"As he said, we have followed his directions," Remus said and gestured with his arm again to the staircase behind him. "This is what he was talking about. Just up these stairs is the portrait of the Fat Lady."

Lily took the lead and Remus followed. The two of them guided the first years up the three flights of stairs until they finally stopped in front of her portrait. She looked asleep but when she caught sight of the first years, she perked right up.

"Look at that; I had a hunch Dumbledore would give you two the badge," she said happily and looked over their shoulders to see the first years all lined up. She cooed with happiness. "And look at that, they have such wonderful manners. Password?"

"Iris," Lily said.

"Right you are," the Fat Lady said and swung her door open.

The first years all scurried into the Gryffindor common room and spread out about the room.

"We are currently on the seventh floor so just remember the Gryffindor Tower is on the seventh floor," Lily said and stood on the right side of Remus. She lifted her arm and pointed. "Girls' dormitories are on my right and boys' dormitories are on the left."

The first years dissipated to the left and right, separating by gender. Remus stayed completely and utterly still until the last first year hurried out of sight. Lily sighed and rested her forehead on his shoulder as soon as they were all out of sight.

"As tired as I am, I do have to tell you something, Lily," Remus said, his lips barely moving and his posture was very tense and stiff. "I promised you I would."

"Yes you did," Lily said, perking up. "And I have been curious all day. I so desperately want to know. Shall we sit down?"

"I would rather do this outside," Remus admitted and finally turned to look at her.

She blinked in surprise to see his blue eyes filled with so many unreadable emotions he was feeling. When she hesitated, Remus looked at his feet for he simply could not lift his eyes to look at her again.

"Of course," she said and touched his wrist again. "I know the best way to get out of here."

Remus smiled slightly when she took his hand and led him out of the common room. She led him down two halls and all seven flights of stairs. Remus did not question how she knew her own ways out of the castle that was nearly undetectable. But she led him out through a small window, small enough to not look suspicious but big enough for him to fit through. She guided him outside and instantly, Remus was greeted with the sounds of the night.

He could hear crickets at night, the sound of insects calling to one another, and the sound of the small waves at the lake. Lily had taken him to the lake, the very place they always had deep conversations. Remus smiled again as she took him to the edge of the lake, silently slipping through the soft grass, barely making a sound. The lights did not reach this part of the castle so it offered them slight privacy.

"What do you think?" she asked once she stopped. "I found it in my second year."

"Dear Lily, it is gorgeous," Remus said at once.

"Excellent," she said and seated herself comfortably. "Will you sit down, Remus? There is no need to be so nervous!"

Remus winced slightly as his arm was being pulled down. She had not let go of his hand once during their expedition outside. He sat down and she twined their fingers together and gripped his cold hand even tighter with her smaller yet warmer one.

Remus just enjoyed the tranquility of the outdoors and the beautiful sound of the lake. He could hear frogs in the distant and birds flapping their wings methodically. He listened to the owls calling in the middle of the night. He could also catch the noises of other birds hopping around the branches above his head. Remus breathed in and immediately, he could smell all the scents of the lake. He simply loved hearing the calming noises.

And then he moved his fingers, realizing that he and Lily had not yet let go of each other's hands. He smiled to himself once again. He listened to her even breathing, her calm breathing and it soothed him for the briefest of moments. He closed his eyes and leaned back on his other hand. If it was going to be the last time he and Lily would ever talk, he wanted to remember the good times just moments before.

"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.

"Okay," Remus said and let go of her hand.

As soon as he did, he suddenly felt colder, more alone, more recluse in the night.

"I am going to plunge on before I lose my confidence," Remus said and touched her shoulder ever so gently before drawing back. "Lily, I am not quite like other people. I kind of turned out a bit differently."

"I always thought you were unique, Remus," Lily said and smiled a bedazzling smile. "That is no news to me."

"You are mistaken; besides, you are the unique one," Remus said quickly and rubbed his eyes wearily. "I am different in a bad way. I am dangerous, Lily. I am not even...human."

Lily blinked and Remus could not tear his gaze away from his striking green eyes. They disappeared for a moment when she closed her eyes but they reappeared when she opened them again. Remus suddenly felt all of his confidence disappear and suddenly, he did not want to be having this conversation.

"Lily?" Remus whispered, suddenly thinking whispering sounded just too loud. "Lily, I am a werewolf."

There was nothing, absolutely nothing, and right then and there, Remus felt the line of friendship break off. He did not want to be there. He did not want to be anywhere near her. He wanted to get as far away from her as he could. He wanted to be with his friends in his dormitory, sitting with them and conversing with them. He could not stand the silence. He could not stand just sitting there and waiting for rejection, disappointment, disgust.

Remus swallowed and stood up so silently, he could not even hear himself. Those tranquil and peaceful noises of the night suddenly sounded ten times louder. It was as if they were masking his footsteps of retreat. His fingers ghosted over the badge and he slipped it off his Hogwarts robes. He set the badge down next to her knee and whispered, for the last time, in her ear:

"I am sorry."

Remus did not cry but he felt as if he walked a thousand miles of nothing but misery. He walked ever so silently and tried to map out a new way to get back without getting caught and without using the same route he came here on. Still, he could not hear Lily moving to get him. He could not hear Lily calling out his name. He knew she was done with him and no longer wanted to associate with such vileness. He had lost his dear friend.

Remus turned sharply and started lightly jogging towards the general direction of the courtyard, a plan already formulating in his head. It was not long before he forced himself to slow down, his breathing ragged and his legs screaming through exhaustion. Remus wanted to sit down but he also wanted to create as much distance from him and Lily as he could.

He did not know exactly where he was but he had a general idea of where he was headed to. He started off at a quick pace and hurried past the same tree he was on his way down here. He stopped beneath it and rested against its trunk and closed his eyes and suddenly memories of Lily and him began rushing through his head. It was as if his own mind was taunting him, using his weakness against him.

"Remus?"

That voice absolutely startled him out of his dazed demeanor. He blinked several times through the darkness and his jaw nearly dropped open. Despite the lack of light, Remus could not ever mistake that flaming red hair and those mesmerizing green eyes. He could not mistake that lark-song voice or the scent of a meadow that lingered around him. He could not mistake Lily Evans.

"Remus, this is yours," Lily said.

Remus was about to ask what she had meant but he suddenly felt gentle and caring fingers ghost his chest as she pinned something back on his robes. When he lifted his hand he brushed fingers with hers and beneath their entwined fingers, he felt the Prefect badge he had formerly set beside her knee. Lily placed her hand over theirs and pushed him back against the trunk.

"You can trust me," Lily said and buried herself closer to him. "You can trust me because I trust you."

"You are putting your trust in a werewolf. I strongly advise against it," Remus said, his lips barely moving and his posture was tense.

"I am putting my trust in you," Lily insisted. "And I could not have asked for anything better."

"I cannot stay—what happens when you realize you cannot be friends with a werewolf—a monster, Lily—what are you going to do?" Remus said and tried prying himself from her hands. "I simply cannot face more rejection and hatred and disgust. Do not ask me to for it would be cruel."

Lily shook her head wordlessly and clung to his robes like a lifeline. She would not let go despite Remus's attempts to free himself. She kept pressing herself closer to him, inching herself closer to him, making sure he was still with her.

"I would never, my soul would be forever damned if I let you go," Lily whispered and hid her face in his shoulder. "I will not let you go."

"What is the meaning of this, Lily?" Remus asked in a pain filled whisper.

"I am not letting you walk out on my life without a fight," Lily said, crying softly. "You are too important to me. I will not stand for it, Remus. I am not going to lose you."

"Dear, Lily," Remus said gently and rested his hand on her shoulder. "How can this departure be easy if you refuse to accept it?"

"That's just it, Remus!" Lily insisted, wiping her eyes. "I am not going to accept it! I need you, werewolf and all, in my life and you will not just waltz out of it for no good reason and leave me behind."

"Why, why are you so kind?" Remus asked, his own eyes filling with emotional agony. "I cannot help but expect anything but sympathy and care."

"Those people be damned!" Lily cried and clung tightly to his midriff. "I need you, Remus. I need you more than you think."

"And I you," Remus replied and finally returned the embrace.

The two of them stood underneath that tree, clinging to each other like they had seen each other for the first time in years. Lily was in nestled in between his legs whilst the werewolf had his leg wrapped around her ankle, pulling her closer.

"I think we ought to get back inside," Remus said and looked at Lily. "I will see you tomorrow for patrol."

"Indeed you will," Lily said and finally detached herself from him. "Come on, let's go back my way."

"Fair deal," Remus said lightly.

.oOo.

"Well?" James demanded, folding his arms over his chest and leaning against Remus's bed post.

"What do you mean?" Remus asked innocently.

The two of them were the only ones who managed to stay up past midnight. Ssirius and Peter were out at ten and Frank was out at eleven. That left James and James was curious as to why Remus was so late coming back from patrol and he was also curious as to know how Lily Evans would react to Remus's confession. He was a bit nervous for Remus in case she really did reject him.

But James knew Lily Evans was a good person, even if she did not display it towards him at all. He had to stay up for Remus.

"I mean, how did it go? What did you all do? How did you tell her? How did she reply? Remus! Work with me here. I want to know details!" James said, snapping his fingers and tapping Remus with his foot.

"I think she is a very understanding person," Remus said and lay back down. "You have chosen an amazing person to win over. She is something, James."

James narrowed his eyes.

"She accepted you," James concluded and broke into a smile. "I knew she would. People be damned who don't."

"Funny," Remus said vaguely. "She said the same thing. What do you know, eh?"

"Funny, yeah," James said and patted Remus's leg. "This is exciting—I am glad you approve of her because this is the year I will finally win her over!"

"Dear God above."


	5. V: What now? Where is he?

**All rights remain.**

"James Potter!" Professor McGonagall shouted.

James groaned and slammed his hand on the table with his arms covering his face. Remus sighed and rolled his eyes, unsure what James did already to get Professor McGonagall yelling at such an unholy hour of the morning.

"I haven't done anything!" James whispered fiercely and desperately to his friends.

"Who knows," Peter said with a shrug. "You might have really got her angry—"

"Doing what?" James hissed. "Breathing?"

Professor McGonagall came over and James winced, waiting for castigation and shouting and disapproval and anger but none came. He cracked an eye open and saw that Professor McGonagall was simply searching through her large stack of papers in her hand.

"Yes, Professor?" James asked cautiously and slowly.

"You haven't done anything yet, Potter. I am getting your schedule; someone forgot to put these in alphabetical order," Professor McGonagall said and pushed his schedule into his hands. "There you are, Potter."

"Thanks!" James said happily and took a closer look at the item in front of him.

"I have Black's schedule here, too."

Professor McGonagall pulled out another schedule and handed it to the Black heir. Sirius scowled at the name but his scowl instantly vanished at the sight of his new schedule. Remus received his next and Peter received his last.

The four of them looked over their own before the instantaneously slammed them on the table. Professor McGonagall gave up trying to understand them a long while ago. She simply rolled her eyes with a scoff and walked off.

"Okay, we look at each other's on the count of three—" Sirius began.

"Make it four," Peter said and shrugged when Sirius eyed him weirdly. "There are four of us...you know..."

"Fine. One..." Sirius said.

"Two..." Peter said next.

"Three..." Remus said afterward.

"Four!" James said lastly.

The Marauders removed their hands off their schedules and bent over the table to look at one another's. Remus was staring at James's and found that him and James had all the same classes. It might have been the fact that they had all signed up for the same classes

"What did you get?" Sirius asked, looking at Remus's schedule.

"The same ones as James did," Remus said and brought forth James's schedule. "I think we are all going to have the same schedule seeing as we had signed up for the same classes."

"Then why are we worrying about schedules?" James asked, raising an eyebrow. "Look here! We have an open period!"

"So?" Remus muttered, taking a bite of his delicious toast. "What is so great about that? We have about an hour and a half before we head off to Charms."

"We can do so much in an hour and a half!" James insisted and grinned. "How about we hang around? We are at Hogwarts! There is so much to do."

"I hate to interrupt but the mail is here," Peter said, pointing upward. "It looks like all of you got mail."

True to his word, Remus looked up at recognized three owls. James's owl was circling low, looking for his owner. Sirius's owl was soaring high above the others, letting out a horrid screech of anger at the second owl that was hovering high above the rest.

"Is that your owl up there, Remus?" Sirius asked, joking slightly. "Yours is going after mine."

Ohanzee finally let Sirius's fly to its owner before heading towards his own. Remus, knowing he did not receive anything from his family, kept an impassive expression on his face when the owl landed on the table.

"Thanks," Remus said, stroking Ohanzee's feathers. "Here."

He handed his owl a piece of toast before Ohanzee flew off back to the Owlery. He set the Daily Prophet aside and looked over at James, who had gone completely still. His note was still in his hands, which were shaking. His usually happy hazel eyes were now dancing with suppressed shock and other emotions mingled in. Remus frowned slightly and was about to say something but it was obvious that he was not the only one to notice James's weird reaction.

Sirius noticed, too.

"James?" Sirius whispered, leaning over towards his best mate. "Are you okay?"

"I am okay, I am," James said and flashed Sirius a reassuring smile. "I am not really hungry. I will meet up with you later."

"Nonsense," Sirius said, standing up at once, and he grabbed his bag. "We are going with you."

"Please," James said and held up his hand. "Finish your breakfast and I will find you later."

With that, James departed with the crumpled note in his left hand. His book bag was sagging low on his hunched shoulders but Sirius was not having James's distant attitude and he rose to his feet. This time it was Peter who protested against Sirius, holding him back with a firm hand.

"Don't bother him," Peter warned and took a deep breath. "James looks like he needs some time to himself, just for a bit. Give him some time, Sirius."

"James is hurt," Sirius said and frowned deeply. "I am curious and only bad friends sit around and wait for them to calm down because they never do. I am going to talk to James so give me some time with him alone."

"Peter might have a point..." Remus said slowly.

Sirius managed to pull a face that made Remus give in and nod. He looked at Peter, who sighed heavily and shrugged a single shoulder as if he realized that he was losing the battle anyway.

"Go for it," Peter and Remus chorused, encouraging his friend.

Sirius rushed out of the Great Hall, nearly forgetting his book bag in his haste. He ignored the several looks he received as he raced out of the grand room. He could see the retreating figure of his best mate as James rounded the corner sharply and disappeared from sight. Sirius quickened his pace until he found James again, leaning against the wall with his head bowed, his shaggy black hair fell over his eyes.

Sirius frowned, walking quietly at first as if he was walking up to a wild animal and being cautious to not wake it up. James was completely unaware that Sirius was mere feet from him for his posture did not move. Something must have made James want to get up for he pushed himself off the wall, stooped low to grab his book bag, and head off farther down the hallway.

"Come on, James," Sirius said, deciding that it would be easier to call out rather than chase him down. He ran to catch up to the other.

"Sirius?" the bespectacled friend said in genuine surprise.

"Yeah, it's me," Sirius said a bit more gently.

"I told you I was fine and I thought I told you I would find you later," James said and started turning the other way.

"Something is bothering you and don't give me that 'I am all okay' business."

James scowled heavily but he did not say a word. His lips remained sealed and his eyes betrayed absolutely nothing; they were like looking at an impassive and emotionless person, which was not James Potter at all.

"James, do not lie to me; I find that insulting," Sirius said very gently this time, his gaze softened considerably. "I know something is wrong but you can tell me."

"Why did you come after me?" James muttered under his breath, his eyes still saying nothing about his true emotions.

It was odd because anyone could read James like a book. It was something that Sirius shared with James; both of them did a spectacular job of expressing their emotions and thoughts with absolute ease. It was something they both had a talent in.

"Because none of us believed you; we decided that you did not need to be overwhelmed with all of us interrogating you," Sirius said and sounded uncharacteristically soothing. "Will you tell me what's wrong with you?"

"Nothing is," James said, his expression turning stoic once more. "Nothing is wrong, Sirius."

Instead of pestering James like Sirius usually would, the Black heir wordlessly took James into a hug and held him there, not letting him go or move in general. To his utter and complete surprise, James broke down and actually started crying. It shook Sirius to the core and tore his heartstrings; he vowed right then and there he would stand for his friend.

James gripped Sirius's shoulders to the point where he was going numb there; but Sirius did not care, he visibly winced when James's entire body shook with the impact of his stifled sobs. And right then and there, Sirius felt tears prick the corners of his eyes and suddenly, he felt himself crying right beside James.

He gripped James, too. He gripped James in a vice-like grasp and would not let go. His breathing became ragged and uneven as he tried so very hard to settle himself down. It hurt him emotionally and physically to see James in such a despairing state and it was even worse because Sirius could not abate it. He could not do anything to alleviate James's pain.

"What happened?" Sirius said, his voice tightening.

"My grandfather died and—and he wanted to see my father but—but no one knows where my father is anymore," James ground out and buried his face into Sirius's robes.

Sirius, in his head, was telling himself to say something comforting at the last but there was nothing he could say that could warrant James's agony. He did not know what had happened to James's father; it had only been two days since he last saw Mr. Potter but his work always required him to go incognito. Sirius understood Mr. Potter's job but he did find it suspicious that he was out of contact with everyone.

"My grandfather prized my father—his son over anything," James said and sunk a little lower. "My mother must be feeling pretty poor right now."

He pulled back and removed his glasses to wipe his eyes.

"My grandparents had my father at a young age so of course they are old. But his death was just so sudden. I kind of had that image that I would be there, too."

"Nonsense," Sirius said comfortingly and wrapped James back in a hug. "Do you want to go back to your mother?"

"I will have to eventually," James said with a sad shake of his head. "I think she would want to be with her family."

Sirius felt another pang of emotional agony for his friend. Without James's father, his mother was alone. He felt tears prick his eyes all over again when he imagined Mrs. Potter trying to prod someone from the dead.

James must have had thought about something just as depressing and sad as that for he suddenly just started crying again. Sirius so desperately wanted to wipe James's tears away but he did not have the strength to lift his arms to do so.

He and James just stood in the middle of the hall in a comforting embrace. It was so unnerving to see James's face streaked with tears, he forgot what James looked like when he cried because the last time he ever saw that happen was during their second year. It hurt him to see his friend like this and he wished he could offer his happiness to him.

"What now?" Sirius said softly.

"Will you tell the others what happened?" James asked, taking a step back. "I am going to talk to Professor McGonagall."

"Sure," Sirius said at once but then he paused uneasily. "Do you know when your grandfather died?"

"My mother said she went over to find him late last night," James said and gripped his book bag's strap tighter. "He was er—my last grandparent."

"I expect you want to head on over," Sirius said and bowed his head to blink his tears away. "Good luck, my friend."

James nodded and managed a smile that did not quite reach his eyes. But the saddened fifth year started walking away and Sirius felt his heart break all over again.

"And James," Sirius called as loudly as his closed throat would allow him. He tried speaking but ended up just gesturing to himself. Finally, after a few attempts, he managed to say what he wanted. "I'm sorry."

Again, James attempted a small smile but he waved slightly before disappearing around the corner.

Sirius could only watch his beloved friend walk away and suddenly he felt more tired than he had in years.

He slowly forced himself to walk back to Great Hall where he could hear happy voices and jovial laughter. He hated how everyone seemed too happy when he was suffering. Remus caught sight of Sirius first and he immediately raced over to him.

"Come out here," Remus said gently and guided Sirius back out of the Great Hall, away from other people's prying eyes. "What happened?"

Sirius took his time retelling James's story and throughout the very brief explanation, he could feel Remus's agony crash off him in waves. Peter was gripping his shoulder very tightly and somehow that pressure made him feel rooted to the ground.

"I wonder if James's father knows about it," Remus wondered to himself.

.oOo.

Professor McGonagall was up to her neck in stress and The Marauders sudden departure did not help her mounting head ache. She swore, if they were planning another prank, she would give them the most arduous detention she could come up with. The declaration was at the tip of her tongue.

She angrily pushed away a small stack of papers and rubbed her eyes wearily. She promised sometime last year that she would give them a chance now that one of the four wore that Prefect badge. She really did have hope in Remus but he could only hold them back far and for so long.

Then knocking interrupted her train of thought, making her grumble quietly to herself. She hauled herself out of her comfortable chair to answer the door. She expected a lost first year or any student other than the one standing before her.

"Potter," she asked in surprise. She felt her eyebrows shoot upward.

"I have to go home, Professor," James said and shifted from foot to foot. "Something happened and I have to get back home."

"Excuse me?" Professor McGonagall said, suddenly feeling confused. "What is going on?"

"My grandfather died and I want to see my mother," James said and bowed his head. He said it so quietly, she nearly missed it.

"Potter, if this is some kind of weird joke you and your friends—"

"How dare you!" James shouted, kicking back a desk; his true Quidditch strength as beginning to show for he was managed to uplift a desk with ease. "How dare you think I am making this up? My father is missing and my mother is alone! I don't even think my father knows his father died!"

"Potter—"

"If you don't help me—if you don't—I'll go—I'll leave anyway!" James snarled.

He looked quite different, he looked like someone who could genuinely have the capability to have human emotions other than arrogance. She, of course, had seen James's more caring and gentle side; it always showed whenever it involved his friends but it was a bit of a rarity.

"Potter, of course I will help you," Professor McGonagall said and gestured to her fireplace. "I understand—take the Floo powder."

James did not thank her...but truthfully, his throat would not allow him to speak. He was already starting to cry again but he held it together until he turned to face her. She still had that stoic and stern look upon her face but it was mingled with something like concern.

Professor McGonagall could not believe her own student suddenly came into her office with tears upon his features and looking so depressed. She was having a hard time wrapping that around her head; but James interrupted her thoughts once again.

"Cicero Potter's House!"

Professor McGonagall watched her own student spin out of sight as the emerald flames engulf him until he was out of view. She had no idea what she had just done but she did know one thing; she had thoroughly offended James, which was a rarity in itself. Professor McGonagall knew she had something poor and unfiltered for James was outraged.

She had just let her student leave Hogwarts because he claimed his grandfather died. Of course she was going to believe James; contrary to popular belief, she really did trust her students, especially The Marauders.

.oOo.

"Sirius, did James leave?" Remus asked.

Remus and Peter caught up with Sirius on their way to Charms with Professor Flitwick. It had been an hour since the news and since James had evidently departed but it felt like a lifetime ago.

"Yeah," the Black heir said, slowing his pace to allow the other two to catch up. "Professor McGonagall let him through; she was actually genuinely concerned for James's well being. She called me to her office five minutes after James came barging in."

"Really? What did she want?" Peter asked, readjusting his book bag to a more comfortable position. "What did she ask?"

"She wanted to know what was going on—she wanted the story in a less frantic and hasty way," Sirius said with a shrug of a single shoulder. "I think she was actually worried...well, she looked worried."

The three of them were not the first ones to Charms; there were a group of Hufflepuffs in the front, talking excitedly to one another. The Marauders resumed their usual position in the back of the room where they could sit and talk whilst participating in the lesson. Professor Flitwick acknowledged them with a wave of his hand before he turned back to his large stack of parchment that were resting on his desk.

"I wonder what that is," Peter said, dreading the answer. "I hope it is for another class."

"Those are the OWLs," Remus said and nodded at the professor. "I am betting you anything those are the examinations."

"Gross," Sirius said lazily and started twirling his wand between his fingers. "It is not like we don't know this rubbish; I bet I could take the OWLs now and be completely fine with it."

"Don't bet on that; it is a load harder than you give it credit for," Remus said, trying not to sound too annoyed at Sirius's haughty attitude towards his studies. "I think you might find this year to be more difficult than the last."

"You say that every year," Sirius said dismissively. "It is a _pity_ James isn't here because look what just came waltzing in."

Remus scowled for a moment at his friend's dismissive tone but he followed Sirius's gaze. Walking in with such an air of regality came Lily Evans. Quite clearly, The Marauders were not the only ones who had eyes on the girl. She turned multiple heads at once as she strode in with confidence.

"Man, she has...really hit it off!" Sirius said and covered his face with his hands to stifle his laughter. "I would love to be a Prefect just to hang out with her."

"You are so lucky James is not here to hear you say that," Remus said with a shake of his head. "He would be all over you until you were hexed into oblivion."

"Yeah, but a bloke can hope, eh?" Sirius said but shook his head with a grin. "Ah, I'm only joking. As great as she is, I'll stick to having all the girls in the school instead of just her, you know?"

"If only you didn't sound like a complete arse, I would probably pat you on the back for that ingenious response," Peter said dryly.

"Welcome back to Charms!" Professor Flitwick said and stood upon his stack of books that served as his podium. "I am sure you are all sick of hearing that welcome back speech you have been hearing for four years. Well, students, I have something else to start the year with. As you all know..."

"We know, we know," Sirius whispered to Remus and Peter. "We have the OWLs. It is not like every professor here isn't constantly reminding us even if it is the first day back. Blimey!"

"They all do that just to agitate you specifically," Remus said with a scoff. "They are doing that just to annoy you—just for you."

"Well, it sure seems like it," Sirius muttered and sunk lower into his chair. "it is honestly the same routine every year."

"Quiet you four—er—three!" Professor Flitwick said, breaking off from the monologue.

"He totally used his default 'quiet you four' thing right there. Did you see that?" Sirius asked, snickering to himself and kicking his legs back up, tilting his chair on its back legs. "I cannot be the only one to think that was funny."

"It was but I just don't find it as humorous as you, Sirius," Remus said with a shrug. "So, what do you think James is doing?"

"Probably helping his mother get things back in order—mostly worrying about his missing father," Sirius responded with a shrug. "I dunno, something like that."

"I hope he is all right. He left in a pretty rough shape, wouldn't you say?" Peter said and pushed aside his feeble attempt at notes.

"I am not so sure he is doing much better than he was when he left," Remus said and plucked at the corners of his parchment. "What do you think, Sirius? Sirius?"

When he did not get a reply, he turned in his seat to look at his friend. Sirius's face was contorted with troubled thoughts and he wore a frown that could not be overlooked. Remus narrowed his eyes in suspicion.

"I know—you had that perfect family image in your head," Remus said, understanding his friend. "I know this is not what you want for that perfect family kind of image—especially since it is your friend."

"No kidding," Sirius said with an impatient snort. "It is a pity because that family gave me hope that there are good families still out there."

"Of course there is," Remus insisted and placed a hand over Sirius's shoulder. "You just happen to be in a bad family situation. There are still good people out there—there are still faithful families."

"I long to be in one," Sirius said with a hint of bitterness to his tone.

"I know," Remus said with a sigh.

"Just remember that family does not limit you to your blood relatives," Peter advised wisely.

"Good point, Peter," Remus said and nudged Sirius with his elbow like Sirius had done to him so many times before.

"Of course you are all better than my real family. There is no question about it," Sirius said and perked up immediately. "And that is something I haven't forgotten."

"Stick to it," Remus said with a short nod. "That will help you in the long run."

.oOo.

"James! How are you home?" Mrs. Potter asked, sounding thoroughly shocked.

"I took the Floo network to get back home," James said, crossing the room to envelope his mother in a hug. "I am home."

Mrs. Potter hugged her son back and let his presence calm her down. James pressed his face into his mother's shoulder even if she was shorter than him.

"Why are you home, James?" Mrs. Potter asked, taking a step back to analyze her son. "I was expecting you to stay at Hogwarts—"

"—and leave you here by yourself? Mother, I wouldn't do that to you. I would not make you endure that. I would come home for you," James insisted and went in for another hug.

"Bless you, James," Mrs. Potter said and embraced him. "I need you more than I would like to admit."

"And I you, Mother," James said and the two let go of each other.

They stared at one another for a moment before Mrs. Potter hurried into the other room and grabbed a large file from the desk nearby. Curiously, James stepped forward to see what his mother had brought for him to see.

"What is that you've got?"

"Your father's files, James," Mrs. Potter said and nodded solemnly at the papers. "I think we can use this to our advantage and figure out where your father is."

"Do you think we would be able to with these files? How outdated are these files?" James asked, rifling through some.

"This one is dated in July of this year—it looks like his co-worker Conan wanted him in Iceland," Mrs. Potter said and frowned. "But he stamped his disapproval of departure."

"Iceland?" James echoed. "In July? But that was when Father accepted his position in trial. That stupid friend of Avery didn't take his Miranda rights seriously and what he said was used against him in court. He told me about this—Father did."

"Ah, the trial," Mrs. Potter said to herself and drummed her fingers on the table. "But that is impossible—he did not have a search warrant to search or arrest him."

"I do not think we are talking about the same trial," James said with a shake off his head. "Mum, I don't think Father is with his usual co-workers. Of course, you have said before they haven't been seen either but this is not a coincidence kind of thing."

"What are you thinking?" Mrs. Potter asked, surveying James.

"I think he was separated at the beginning or he never went with them," James said then turned to his mother with a serious expression. "Now, what about Grandfather? What are we going to do?"

"I set up a funeral date for your grandfather, James," Mrs. Potter said and shook her head. "I gave Cicero some time to come back before the funeral. I don't even know if he knows his father died; but just in case...I set the date a bit farther back."

"Good idea."

About an hour after coming home, James was in his room with his books sprawled out around him and his enchanted parchment. With a steady inhale, James dipped his quill in the ink bottle and began writing.

-Remus, you will be happy to know I am studying as we are speaking. I am still a man of my word. -J

-Well, what do you know? James is actually studying; did you hear that, Remy? -S

-I am agog. I am aghast. -R

-Seriously? Hang on, where is Peter? -S

-Here. How are you, James? -P

-I am doing fine. -J

-What is the plan, mate? -S

-My mother has a funeral date planned out and everything; what are you supposed to wear at funerals, anyway? I know it is all black clothing but is there anything else? -J

-Formal black clothes, James. Wash up! -R

-Shave! -P

-Comb your hair! -R

-How do you know? -S

-...I have been to a funeral before. -R

-Oh! Oh, that just got awkward. -S

-Nip it, Sirius. This is about James. -R

James could not suppress a terrified chuckle. Of course Remus would know what to do at a funeral. His father died when he was young and his mother died when he was eleven. The werewolf had lost both of his parents, of course he would know what to do at a funeral.

-Thanks. -J

-No problem, we are all taking notes for you. -P

-Are you? I am agog. I am aghast. -J

-Do not even start, James Cicero Potter. Anyway, that is why Peter is not talking much on here. He is taking Charms notes for you. -S

-Thanks, Peter! -J

-Yeah, yeah. -P

-And James, we really are sorry about what happened. -R

-No worries, you lot. My grandfather was extremely old...like extremely old. My parents knew he was kind of dying anyway. I just don't think my grandfather's death is as unbearable as my missing father. -J

-Well, we ought to go, James. -R

-Yeah, take care of yourself, James. Okay? -S

-I promise. I will be back in less than a week or so. Give or take a few days but count on me being back soon. I miss you guys. -J

With that, James stowed away his parchment and leaned back against his bed. He looked up at the ceiling and the miniature chandelier that hung overhead. He continued to stare at the four walls until his eyes closed with sleep.

.oOo.

In History of Magic, Peter was sitting in between Sirius and Remus. Two of the three were not paying attention and instead were passing notes between one another on regular parchment.

-This is the year, Peter. -S

-Do you think we are going to be able to get it all to work? James said it was crazy impossible and it is really hard not the mention that we are doing this illegally. -P

-Not to mention we are doing this for our friend who needs us. My only worry is James will not be back in time for the first full moon. -S

-Wait, you seriously think we are going to get this all working and ready by first full moon? You do realize that is in two weeks! -P

-It is going to happen very soon. -S

-You are crazy but I believe your words, Sirius. Let us just hope James gets back in time. -P

-Let's hope. -S

* * *

 **I forgot about James's grandparents and I thought this was one way to "introduce" them. Also, I just went to a funeral so I thought it would be good timing.**

 **The better question is where is James's father?**


	6. VI: Fire, Failure, and Acceptance

**All rights remain.**

James had been sitting in a chapel for hours and his legs were beginning to protest. It was even worse when he had to stand and accept people's condolences to him. He might have known three out of the entire crowd. His mother was being very social and calm during the whole ordeal, even when one person bluntly asked where Cicero was.

"He's not here," James snapped and bristled. "He could not make the funeral."

James was sure he was going to get in trouble for being rude to the guest but Mrs. Potter merely smiled and patted James on the shoulder. He felt the warmth from his mother's fingers flow into him and he soaked it in.

"I am so sorry to hear about Ontario, he was a good man who lived a good life," one said and seized James's hand. "And you, my dear, are the spitting image of Ontario."

"Thanks," James said lamely.

This pattern went on for an hour or two, just enough to drive James mad. He had heard loads of comments about how he has grown since he was five (well, no kidding he was going grow!). James sighed and put on his best attitude for his mother but even his best was starting to wear down. He longed to sit in one of the pews but his mother would not allow it.

But...of course that was not the worst part of the funeral (even if it was right up there).

.oOo.

"And we will remember Ontario Nemean Potter as faithful and powerful figure—"

"FIRE! FIRE!"

That was the worst part.

James leaped up from his seat and whisked around to see who was shouting. It was a middle aged man, pointing at the front door. All at once, mothers were seizing their children and running towards the back door. Of course, many were wizards and witches but there was a number of muggles around and exposing their world was not the best thing to do.

James, who had no wand, ran to the upstairs and started herding all the families towards the stairs. The upstairs was not quite as grand as the large church but it was big enough to set in a panic upstairs. Children were screaming and crying, mothers were shouting and stampeding. It was chaotic. He could vaguely see large crowds trying to push their way towards the exit door in the back.

People were pushing each other down the stairs in their haste to get out for the flames of the mysteriously powerful fire were growing larger and larger. James started to feel the effects of the smoke and his lungs were becoming closed off and exhausted. His was inhaling too much smoke by now. Several people were trying to put out the fire with water but to no avail. Something was not right.

But James could not worry about that now. He continued to herd the rest of the families down the stairs and through all the pushing and shoving, James watched as three children were pushed out of the way and shunted all the way back to the second floor where James was standing. The children were separated from their parents and left alone to cry.

"Hang on," James said and seized the girl's hand. "Don't cry, we'll find her."

James watched in horror as the flames finally reached past the closed doors and burst into the main part of the church were they were all hurrying to get out. He could hear people shouting instructions towards the panicking people.

"BREAK THE WINDOWS!"

Several people took whatever they could find and smashed the beautiful stained glass windows. The sound of glass shards flying resounded through the grand church and James instantly curled himself around the three children and gathered them all underneath him. Several people screamed as the shards embedded themselves in their skin and stuck there.

The screaming became inaudible once again as they continued to rush out. The fire was now racing towards a large group of people whilst growing in size. James could feel the fire through the floor. The children were crying and clinging on to James's dress robes. His glasses were becoming smeared and hard to see but he could not have cared less. He had lost sight of the children's mother and father.

"Where is my mummy?" one girl screeched and buried her face in his midriff.

"We will get her," James vowed and combed through her hair. "Just give me some time."

But as soon as he finished saying that, James felt the second floor groan and creak. The heat was becoming nearly unbearable underneath his feet and all of the sudden, he felt as if his feet were on absolute fire. James screamed and wrapped himself around the children just as the second floor caved in and fell. Several people on the stairs fell and did not stir.

James was determined to not be one of those charred bodies; he was not going to let a mother and a father lose their children. James collapsed with the impact; ever so softly, he could hear the children next to him screaming and crying. He twisted himself to face them and saw that they had all fallen with him.

"I'm so sorry," James shouted but he was cut off by a fit of coughing. "We are going to get you all out."

The children found their way to James's side and stuck close to him. And then James looked to the front and he felt tears splash in his eyes; no one was wheeling the coffin of his grandfather away from the fire. Torn, half of James wanted to go after his grandfather and the other half of him was screaming at him to keep track of the kids; and that was just what he did.

"Come with me," James said and pulled them closer. "Stick close to me."

Little did he know, his mother was at the edge of the panicking crowd, screaming for her beloved child. She would not lose her entire family.

The fire was scorching and James was beginning to feel like he was going to pass out from the heat and smoke inhalation. The children were coughing, too, struggling as much as he was to breathe. The crowd seemed to be slowing down as more and more people fell to the mercy of the fire. It was licking up the pews as if it was nothing. James was clutching on to one to keep his balance.

"We will get you out," James said and seized the littlest girl. "Do you trust me?"

The girl did not reply so James took that as a yes. Without warning, James tore off in the other direction, away from the fire, but away from the crowd and as hard as he could, he ran straight into the smallest window in the church. He felt his entire arms, knees, and scream in pain at the impact but he smashed through the window and collapsed on the grass.

The little girl fell, too, but she stirred as soon as she hit the grass. She was screaming and James could see the blurred scene of a thousand shards of glass in her skin, piercing her everywhere.

"Stay here," James said and pulled himself to his feet.

And with that, he raced right back into the church. The flames were already engulfing the middle of the church, just feet away where the crowd was still trying to get out. But James could not find the other children. Perhaps they found their own way out, James continued to survey the church for them but he still found no sign of the others. With no choice left, James had to retreat.

He could not watch as the crowd howled and bellowed and cried and screeched with agony as the fire had finally reached them. And there, there it was. He caught a glimpse of two children sitting on the debris of the second floor.

"No!" James shouted and raced towards the window; but by the time he planted a foot inside the building, the fire already swallowed the top of the rubble and ate the children.

He did not need to see that but his mind was telling him to go back inside and so he did. Ash covered and finding it increasingly difficult to breathe, James plunged back in to see the damage. Sitting in the front pews, he could see two elderly people sitting right beside his grandfather's coffin. James rushed over to them and stood right in front of them.

"Are you insane! Get out!" James shouted, looking at the exit. The crowd was having a difficult time escaping with the bodies that littered the exit.

"We're too old," the man said and smiled gently. "We won't make it out of that fire. Your grandfather was my absolute best mate. We promised we would do everything together."

"What the hell?" James snapped, trying to get around to help them out.

"And I vowed to him we would," the man said and sat back. "We will die together."

"You didn't die together!" James shouted but started hacking from the smoke. "He died a while ago!"

"My rock in whom I trust. And He will raise you up," the man said, looking confused but blissfully so.

The man did not appear to have heard him but the other elderly man waved James off; the bespectacled boy watched in surprise and the second man pick his friend up and walked him right to the casket. James had no time to understand; he left them and ran towards the broken window but as soon as he did, the church's ceiling broke and the entire roof fell in.

James, buried underneath several layers of dust and debris, could not find his way out. Worried, dying, but determined to live, James began to kick away the brick and stone until he was able to pull himself through. He sent one last look at his grandfather's coffin and his grandfather's dearest and closest friends before he hurled himself out the window and on to the grass.

Little did he know, his favorite wrist watch (which was given to him by his mother, was melted right into his skin. He could still hear the screams of people who were trapped in the building and without warning, James was blasted backward like many others as the church exploded.

* * *

"Lupin? Black? Pettigrew?" Professor McGonagall said, striding up to them.

Peter, Remus, and Sirius all looked at her with confused looks. She never looked so pale and exhausted in their life. It frightened Remus but he could hardly pay attention to that now. Something was seriously wrong.

"Professor?" Sirius asked.

"There was an accident," she said breathlessly.

"What?" Peter barked, setting down his book to look at her properly.

"There was an attack on the Potter's funeral; many died that day," Professor McGonagall started but Sirius jumped up and ripped off his Hogwarts robes, suddenly feeling too warm and hot.

"You're wrong!" Sirius shouted and yanked at his tie, trying to loosen it. "James isn't dead! James's isn't hurt!"

Professor McGonagall sighed and stood up, too. Sirius continued to shake his head, cursing at nothing but cursing at everything. Remus was still with shock and Peter was mute with horror.

"I have heard enough crying!" Sirius shouted. "I am not going through any more tragedy!"

"James is alive," Professor McGonagall said and frowned again. "But he is injured like most. The church exploded and many were killed by impact. He is taken under medical attention."

"How is this happening?" Remus said, keeping his calm disposition. "How is this happening?"

"Stop it! Stop it!" Sirius said, clutching his head and sinking to his knees. "James is not injured. He is safe, he is okay. He is my best mate. He will be fine!"

Professor McGonagall did not say anything nor did she show any sign of comfort; she simply sat there with a blank expression and distant eyes. Remus was thinking of everything all at once, what could he do?

"When can we see him?" Peter asked, trembling.

"I don't know, Pettigrew."

The Marauders looked completely at lost for words. They just sat there, sat there in silence because how were you suppose to respond to that? How were you suppose to respond to such tragedy? Remus looked at Sirius who was just standing there with his arms crossed over his chest and his gaze was just staring at the ceiling before him. Remus worried about his Sirius.

"Professor, what happened?" Remus asked quietly, not wanting to disturb Sirius's deep thought.

"You-Know-Who's followers caught wind of the funeral," Professor McGonagall answered equally quietly.

"But why?" Peter was the one to ask.

"It was all in the name of inflicting fear," Professor McGonagall said. "Plus, the Potter's were a major blood-traitor family."

The Marauders sat with their heads bowed and their gazes cast downward; their hearts ached and their thoughts went out to James. Unable to see him, unable to contact him, they were left completely in the dark to guess and wait and yearn for the news of their beloved friend. The thought was draining what energy they all had previously.

* * *

"Feeling tired," was the first words James spoke.

"You are awake," Mrs. Potter said, looking relieved. "I was so worried you wouldn't."

James could only look at the ceiling but the sound of his mother's voice brought him comfort. His closed his eyes again and just listened; his arms felt warm and scratchy and he slowly turned his head to his left wrist. He could still see the engraving of his watch melted into his skin. He could see the little marks the broken glass had left on him and that was when he jolted into shock.

"What about those children?" James grunted and sat up. "What about that little girl?"

"She is paralyzed," Mrs. Potter said slowly. "She didn't escape the explosion quick enough."

James bowed his head and closed his eyes tight, hoping this was nothing but a horrid dream or something other than reality. After he worked so hard to get her out of the church, she ended up paralyzed.

"What about her siblings?" James asked. "Are they dead?"

When there was no answer, James could already guess the answer. Sighing heavily, he walked over to his mother and knelt at her knees, looking up at her with solemn eyes. She watched him carefully.

"I met the ones who separated her from her family; he resides in a contrite spirit," Mrs. Potter said but James did not want to hear it.

"What happened?"

"We were all under attack," Mrs. Potter said and patted James's shoulder. "It was no accident."

James closed his eyes and hung his head for the briefest of moments before he raised it back up and looked directly into her eyes.

"What happened to the coffin?"

"It was burned," Mrs. Potter said. "So we went with cremation and scattered his ashes in the very meadow he desired for so long, James. You could not make it; you were in critical condition."

"His friends?" James asked, his throat closing up.

"Their ashes are with your grandfather's."

James was unsure if he could bear to hear any more so he stood up and sat back on his bed, looking at his blackened and charred skin that they had done their best to heal. James knew, too well, that dark magic injuries were much harder to heal. He watched Remus come back with so many scars that could not be healed by magic.

"Hallelujah," the Healer said and came in. "Praise Him that you made it through; how are you feeling?"

"Fine," James snapped and suddenly felt bitter. "Where is he?"

Mrs. Potter knew exactly what her son was talking about but she did not answer; James growled and stormed past the Healer, ignoring the aches and pain that followed with each furious footstep.

As predicted, there was a swarm of Daily Prophet editors and writers swarming a room; pushing past all of them, James flung open the door and stormed in, walking right to the patient's head. The man, who James vaguely remembered, looked at him with remorseful eyes before closing them.

"What have you done?" James snarled in a low and quiet voice.

"Bear me on the breath of dawn," the man said though his eyes were still closed.

James just stood there, standing at the man's head. He could not say anything because whatever he was going to say next simply would not make sense. James could still hear the annoying clicks and shoving of the Daily Prophet editors and he was so tempted to shove them all away. If anger could do just that, James would have sent them all sprawling.

"Get out of my way," James growled as he exited the room. "Get out of my way."

The crowd parted ever so slightly for him to get through but James shoved past them all with his head held high. Several Healers came to meet him and they surrounded him in a flurry of movement. James barged past them as well and went directly to his room.

His worries evaporated when he saw his mother with open arms. He brought himself right into them and let her calm him down. He did not expect everything to happen quite like that.

"Can you relax, James? These Healers will help you," Mrs. Potter said gently and continued to comb her fingers through his shaggy and unruly hair. "Trust my words, James. They are here to help."

* * *

That night, neither of the three were able to sleep. Their thoughts were simply too roiled and running; they could not fall asleep not knowing how their friend was. Realizing that they had each other for comfort, the three of them created a circle on Sirius's bed, knees touching and heads bent low.

Frank, who sensed something was wrong, moved to back out of the dormitory until Remus beckoned him over. Together, they decided it was okay to explain the attack on James's family and Frank instantly sunk to his knees.

The four of them, oddly enough, sat together in a tight circle and offered each other's sympathy and comfort and company. It was just enough to get them all through the night.

Little did they know, James Potter was sitting in the hospital bed at St. Mungos wondering just how well his friends were doing without him. He was thinking about his grandfather's friends and how they had burned beside their best friend. James wondered if that was how The Marauders were going to go. He wondered if they would be sitting, old and withering, with each other nonetheless.

 _How long would The Marauders stick together?_

 _"To the end, I hope."_

* * *

 **Funnily enough, the fire was based on true events although the story is still private and probably will remain so.**


	7. VII: Dance To The Future

**All rights remain.**

"You're back!"

Sirius screeched and threw himself out of his cocoon of blankets. He rushed up to James and crushed him into a hug. James, a bit startled, gladly hugged him back and laughed heartily. Remus smiled much more calmly and closed the book on his finger.

"You had us worried," Remus said and got up from his bed. "Sirius was convinced you were not coming back."

"I was not gone that long," James said with a grin that definitely reached his eyes. "Blimey, so much has happened; I am just glad I am back here."

"How is your mum?" Peter asked from his bed. "Is she feeling better?"

"Much," James said, sounding relieved. "She is doing quite a bit better; I think she just did not want to be alone during that whole thing. She was glad I came home for that, she made that much clear."

"I bet she was so ecstatic that you were alive and recovering," Remus said logically. "When Professor McGonagall told us, it was...so hard to grasp. I could not believe it; but I am just glad you are and your mum are feeling better."

The three friends let James settle back in the dormitory, which only took a few minutes. Not ten minutes later, The Marauders—all four of them—were sitting in a circle, leaning against James's and Sirius's beds.

"You didn't miss much," Peter said and pulled out the notes he had collected during his friend's absence. "Those are the notes I took."

"I'll get you yours later," Sirius said waving a dismissive hand. "I want to know how you are and everything. Blimey, I missed you and I am beginning to realize how much I missed you."

"I am back and better as ever," James said and tucked away the notes. "Thanks for this, by the way."

"Sure."

"We were just resting a bit before we went to Defense Against the Dark Arts; are you up to join us for class?" Remus asked, surprisingly not pushing James too hard.

"No—yeah, yeah," James said with a firm nod. "Let me get my book bag first and find everything. Hang on..."

Remus watched James rummage through his belongings until he pulled out the textbook and quills he was looking for. Several other items spilled out of his trunk but James payed that no mind.

"I have loads of stuff," James said and shrugged. "I brought a whole thing of stuff I was going to during the funeral dinner but that was destroyed in the fire so we had to go out and get some more."

"I see," Remus answered. "What was burned in the fire?"

"I had a few of my textbooks but who cares much about that? I had some pictures I was going to paste up on the bulletin for my grandfather. I had some letters from my father I was going to bury with him, too. I had some of my own personal stuff I was going to send off, too."

"Sorry," Remus said hastily but James shook his head.

"I can talk about it if you want," he insisted. "But anyway, I was studying the first few chapters of Transfiguration but of course, I could not practice. I asked her if her and I could practice a bit and she agreed."

"Good for you," Remus congratulated.

"Thanks," James said with a grin. "I don't suppose it was too much of a challenge. It was just a simple incantation that looks pretty bearable, you know?" James sat back down with his book bag close to him.

"Definitely," Sirius agreed happily. "Okay, that is Remus's time-to-go expression. WE probably should head out soon...James, you're coming?"

"Course," he replied and stood up. "I can handle this lesson."

Professor Rauni was one of the oddest Defense Against the Dark Arts professors he had ever had; and that included Professor Songlure and all his weird hands-on activities. Professor Rauni was one of those people to be highly unpredictable. He was one of those opinionated philosophers that Remus had little patience with. Listening to Professor Rauni talk about the rights for elves but the rights of werewolves already put a bad impression on him.

Remus was scowling the entire class.

James, Sirius, and Peter caught this and Sirius nudged Remus under the desks. Grumbling, Remus turned around reluctantly and glowered at his friends for interrupted his scowling.

"I dare you to say something—stand up to him, Prefect Remus!" James said, giving him the thumbs up.

Remus rolled his eyes. "What am I supposed to say? 'I, Remus Lupin, would like to speak on behalf of my kind'?"

"You read my mind, best mate," James said with a wink. "Say something—because if you don't, Sirius and Peter and I will. And we will probably say loads of things that will land us in detention. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

Remus's fingers brushed the badge and he thought of Professor Dumbledore and the hope the Headmaster had in Remus to rein in his friends.

"Okay," Remus said and raised his hand without having anything to say planned in his head. It looked like he was just going to have to wing it.

"Lupin?" Professor Rauni asked with a raised eyebrow. "Are you going to contribute to the class?"

"On behalf against your argument," Remus said with a grin. "I do not concur with your statement at all. Werewolves, as you know, are humans during the day and werewolves at night—only during the full moon. Blue moons do occur but we—werewolves are humans more often than werewolves."

Professor Rauni opened his mouth but Remus talked right over him.

"Like many others, you forget that werewolves are also humans that walk among you."

"And could you speak on behalf of Fenrir Greyback, Lupin?" Professor Rauni asked, folding his arms over his chest, looking cross. "I know that man has no human emotions anymore—besides hunger and thirst for power and revenge—all in the name of inflicting fear."

"It is unwise of you to base a whole kind of population on one person whom you evidently know the most about. But I guarantee you could be speaking to a werewolf without even knowing it. Humans are humans."

"And werewolves are werewolves," Professor Rauni said with a shrug. "Them in disguise—as humans—only makes us more vulnerable and them more dangerous."

"And prejudice will be prejudice. Even the most can be surprised with what they find out," Remus said with a shrug. "It is only worse when they find out they were wrong. It is unwise to base opinions about a subject that is clearly one you have not researched enough."

"That's my boy!" James and Sirius chorused and started clapping.

James stood up. "Do you see that? That is my Remus up there! Professor Rauni, your opinions are absolutely faulty. Where is your evidence?"

"Calm yourself, James," Remus said and put a warning hand on James's arm. "We know who to argue with over what. Even if they, themselves, do not know it. At least Professor Rauni knows not to argue about things he does not know much about."

Remus was sending Professor Rauni a meaningful look that was returned and it felt as if they had made temporary amends.

"Well said," Professor Rauni said and gestured at Remus. "As he so nicely demonstrated, that is one way to think of it."

Remus glared at Professor Rauni but he sat down, his badge burning on his chest, telling him to stay out of trouble.

The rest of the lesson was considerably less interesting after Remus stood up to argue with the professor. Not much had happened after that besides the fact that they got homework right off the bat—some had the sneaking suspicion it was because of Remus but they could think what they wanted, he did not care.

Transfiguration was no picnic either. Professor McGonagall was giving them precise yet not-so-understandable instructions to change a dinner plate to a mushroom. Sirius was grumbling the entire time about how useless this spell was even if he was perfecting the spell after his fourth or fifth try.

To no one's surprise, James got it on his third try. His wand was specifically made for Transfiguration and James just had a wild knack for Transfiguration. Remus scoffed to himself at looked at his own wand and suppressed rolling his eyes. His wand was supposedly made for certain transfiguration but he did not believe it for a moment.

Even Professor McGonagall could not deny James's talent for her class. Without ever having to open the book, James could get the spell right every time. There was not a spell James could not do yet. It puzzled everyone for they knew James stayed away from books, libraries, and studying in general but to James, it was natural.

Contrary to popular belief, Sirius was equally talented at Transfiguration. He and James were the top of the class when it came to natural magic. He, too, could avoid the textbook the entire year but still excel in the class. Remus noticed it because he lived with Sirius for most of the year, the student disregarded the books.

It bothered Remus slightly because he was the top in the class because he spent hours upon reading and studying. Unlike James and Sirius, Remus had to actually open the textbook and study from that whilst practicing magic with his wand.

"Excellent," Professor McGonagall said briskly. "Okay, thirty points to Gryffindor for getting the spell."

She walked past their desks with haste and hurried around the classroom to inspect the other students and their progress.

By the time the class was done, she assigned homework in addition to homework for those who struggled with the spell in class. Unfortunately, Peter was one of those students who were struggling in class and was assigned additional homework.

"Usually you are fine in Transfiguration," James commented on their way out. "I wonder what happened."

"I dunno, I guess I am just out of practice," Peter replied with a shrug of his shoulder. "I am sure I will get it."

"Are we all ready for dinner?" James asked, turning to face his friends. "I am excited for some good food."

"I bet you are," Sirius said with a grin. "I can tell you for sure that I am. Look at me, I am withering away!"

Usually it would have been a good joke but it was no lie. Sirius had lost several pounds over the summer through neglect of a proper meal. His parents commonly disregarded Sirius and handed him whatever the closest edible thing was in their grasp.

In result, Sirius had become more lethargic and thinner. But the boy would have no trouble gaining the missed weight back for he usually ate quite a bit.

"Remember what we talked about?" James said, shooting his eyebrow upward; he had that impish grin that made Sirius grin his impish grin. Something was going down—but for once, Remus and Peter were both knew exactly what was going to happen.

.oOo.

The Great Hall was buzzing with everyone in it. There were crowds and swarms of students hanging about after their long and busy day. Some where in the corners, standing and conversing with one another. Others were sitting at the tables and talking. No one payed The Marauders any mind; it was just another normal dinner in the Great Hall.

The Marauders, like everyone else, came in with their book bags swinging on their shoulders and a few stray books in their arms. They took their seat at the Gryffindor table and smiled at Frank Longbottom, who smiled back.

"Good evening, eh?" Sirius asked randomly, motioning outside.

"Absolutely," Frank said, sounding very staged.

A few heads turned when The Marauders started talking in louder voices. Many just rolled their eyes and resumed their conversation. Remus casually checked his watch and tapped his fingers on the table top. There was a banging noise that vaguely sounded like knocking at the Great Hall doors.

"I've got it!" Sirius shouted, his voice was suddenly amplified.

He skipped (literally skipped) over to the Great Hall's double doors and swung them open. To everyone's complete and utter surprise, saw returning students from several different houses enter the hall. At the end of the long train of people, they saw Fabian and Gideon, Molly, and Arthur.

To many, it was strange to see returning students for they never came round. But for this occurrence, they were definitely coming back. And to Sirius's delight (even if he was expecting it), he caught sight of Andromeda and Ted in the midst of the sudden and abrupt newcomers.

"What is going on here?" Professor McGonagall said and rose to her feet in a sharp move.

"What is this?" Sirius said, standing up on the Gryffindor table; his voice carried throughout the hall.

Now heads turned and stayed turned. Sirius looked very sharp wearing a handsome set of dress robes. His sharp eyes surveyed the area with quivering happiness. His attire was not anything out of the ordinary for the entire Gryffindor table was dressed in beautiful clothing.

"It looks like we have something going on here," James said and waved his hands. "Professor McGonagall, do you have any idea what is going on here?"

"Evidently not," she replied in an equally loud voice but her voice was not magically amplified.

"This is a celebration, Professor," James said and plucked at his robes.

"And what exactly are we celebrating?" Professor McGonagall ground out through gritted teeth.

"As you know my lovely cousin Andromeda married Ted Tonks," Sirius said and pointed at Andromeda and Ted. "They had a beautiful daughter in 1973; we are, three years later, celebrating everything they were not able to."

"Why three years later?" Professor McGonagall asked, raising her eyebrow and placing her hands on her hips.

"Better late than never!"

With that, music blasted loud, echoing throughout the building. Sirius and James, grinning like madmen, pulled Frank to his feet while all of the returning students filed into the Great Hall. Dancing in narrow spaces was not a problem for the dancers.

James, Sirius, and Frank were synchronized dancing with the others on the table; Remus put away his dignity and jumped on to the table with Peter. All of them were looking undeniably good with their black and white dress robes with their neon colored ties. James had neon green, Sirius had neon orange, Remus had neon blue, and Peter had neon yellow.

Flowers sprung from everyone's hand as they conjured beautiful and colorful bouquets. The Gryffindors all jumped up and picked up on the dance. Unlike the monochromatic black Hogwarts was so used to seeing, the Gryffindors were wearing bright colors. Dresses twirled as the girls spun around.

Andromeda and Ted were in the center with their daughter Nymphadora Tonks. Sirius, for the first time, was looking at his relative. Andromeda had never brought Nymphadora in fear of meeting her blood family for they did not take kindly to having a half-blood relative.

"Come and dance with me," Sirius said.

The rehearsed part of the dance was coming where Sirius and James would dance together. As soon as the song hit the solo, everyone stopped dancing and turned to James and Sirius.

The two of them were dancing in sync with one another; Professor McGonagall barked angrily when James and Sirius started gyrating their hips but no one was really listening to her. Remus and Peter jumped up and joined in, gyrating their hips and shoulders.

"YOU KNOW YOU MAKE ME WANNA SHOUT!"

They specifically chose muggle singers because they were "embracing" their inner muggle. Plus, Ted really liked Otis Day.

Four Gryffindor girls came rushing up to The Marauders and joined in the dance from behind. Remus felt Lily's hands on his shoulders as she danced along.

There was so much footwork Remus had to memorize, even if he started practicing a few days prior to coming back to school, he was still struggling. When he kicked his heel up, he managed to kick a goblet of marmalade off the table.

There was cheering and clapping and whistling. The Slytherins sat as still as they could but the music was becoming infectious, making them want to tap their foot to their beat.

"TWIST AND SHOUT!"

"You know you twist so fine," James and Remus shouted to their dance partners. Remus turned to Lily. "Come and twist a little closer now."

All the others started dancing again. Remus, who was back to back with James, was being tugged away by his ridiculously colored tie.

Marlene was doing a fantastic job of swinging her hips wildly, which was why she was the best for Sirius.

Remus had no idea why twisting was so difficult but he really could not do it like Sirius or James, who looked very irresistible at that moment. But the moment of shimming was Remus's biggest dread. He absolutely hated the way he had to lose the dignity he had dancing to a mash of muggle singers.

"CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES!"

Remus twirled Lily away; swinging and swaying to the music; Lily spun around on her toe, her dress twirling, and faced Remus with a smile. Remus's shoulders absolutely hurt by the time he reached her. Remus barely placed his hands on her waist before she grabbed his tie and spun in his arms.

"Dance with me," she said and pulled at the lapels of his dress robes.

Lily placed one leg between Remus's, making him spread his legs subtly wider, and the two of them danced in sync. Remus did notice the slight scowl James held on face when he saw his friend and the love of his life gyrating but he did not say a thing.

"What are we doing right now?" Remus teased.

"Dancing," Lily said and placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned back a little. "We are dancing, Remus. Finally, we are dancing."

"You are dancing with a werewolf," Remus said and gestured to their legs.

"Shut up and dance," Lily said with a roll of her eyes.

Remus laughed in response and gracefully dipped her. Her long hair fell over his arm and swung around her shoulder when he brought her back to her feet. James, Sirius, and Peter all dipped their dance partners with ease. In the center of it all, Andromeda and Ted were dancing as the center piece.

Finally, the song faded to a semi-softer volume, indicating that the dance was over; it ended with the men holding the girls from behind.

They were all breathing pretty heavily and suddenly, the Great Hall seemed ten degrees warmer. Separating himself from Lily, he joined in the large mass applause. Andromeda was jumping up and down in sheer excitement. Remus heard that Andromeda and Ted's celebrations were not the best so Sirius had this on his mind for the longest time.

Fabian and Gideon simultaneously kissed their dance partners on their cheeks before detaching themselves from the girls.

"You were great," Lily said and turned in Remus's arms. "I bet you are warm in all that."

"Very," Remus muttered and removed his arm to tug his tie a bit looser. He unbuttoned the first two closest to his throat and breathed a breath of relief when the collar around his neck loosened as well.

"That was really exciting," Lily said, wiping hair from her eyes. "Do I make a good dancer?"

"An excellent one," James interrupted and barged by Lily. "It was a pity you did not dance with me. We would have been amazing together."

"Not likely, Potter," Lily said and turned back to Remus. "Talk to me later!"

"I will," Remus said more quietly and let go of her.

Sirius came galloping towards them with his expression lit up and flushed from dancing.

"Nymphadora is amazing," Sirius panted and tugged at Remus's sleeve. "You have to come and see her. She is dancing to the music."

Remus allowed Sirius to drag him to the three year old. As soon as she came into view, Remus raised an eyebrow and looked down at the little dancing figure. Sirius grabbed Remus's cold hands and started twisting with him. Remus, rolling his eyes, began dancing with Sirius, free styling it.

"You look great," Sirius said and flashed Remus a grin.

"Thanks," Remus said with a shake of his head. "Why are your hands so warm?"

"I've been dancing and I am like a furnace," Sirius said with a shrug. "I didn't know you could be such a good dancer. Usually you hate dancing."

"I do," Remus said and tried spinning with Sirius as their arms were both raised over their heads.

When they untwisted themselves, Remus utterly jumped out of his skin when another (smaller) hand grabbed his and tried to pry his and Sirius's hands away. Sirius cracked up as little Nymphadora wedged herself between Remus and Sirius.

"What does she want?" Remus asked Sirius, keeping his hands at his sides.

"She wants to dance," Sirius said through his laughter.

Remus looked down at her and took her small hands in his. Nymphadora started twirling and dancing and waltzing about the floor; Remus followed her all around as she continued to dance. He had an easier time spinning her around for he was much taller.

"You two are excellent dance partners," Peter said, coming up; his tie was also loosened and he looked a bit warm. "Evans could have a run for her money."

"I hope not," Lily said and came up beside Peter. Evidently, Peter was her second favorite Marauder. "But I have to admit, this one is a good dancer."

Remus laughed and let go of the girl's hand, stuffing his in his dress robe's pockets. Nymphadora went back to her parents and Remus joined his friends. Most of the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were up and dancing along to the songs that were playing but the original dancers were exhausted. They were all sitting down.

James was talking avidly to Marcus, the former Quidditch Captain. Marcus was nodding enthusiastically and motioning wildly.

Fabian and Gideon came up behind Sirius, Peter, and Remus and hugged them tightly. When they let go, they all clapped each other on the shoulders and welcomed them back.

"Welcome back," Sirius chirped happily. "Seriously, Andromeda is so happy so many people showed up for her."

"Of course I would," Fabian said and looked over at Nymphadora with fondness. "It is exciting that I can finally meet her daughter. I didn't even know she had one until a few months ago."

"She couldn't tell that many," Sirius pointed out. "Her family isn't too happy about her marriage and everything; she was part of my family..."

"Oh," Gideon said and that was all that needed to be said. "But anyway, this celebration is amazing. Honestly, I am really surprised Professor McGonagall isn't over here screaming her head off."

"Oh, trust me," Remus snorted. "I am just as surprised as you are."

"I think Professor Dumbledore stepped in or something before she could," Gideon said with a shrug. "Anyway, I am starving and that dance is exhausting. Do you want some food?"

The Marauders all sat together as they ate. Food had never tasted more delicious to Remus as he had a bit of everything he could reach. His body was just not used to the amount of physical exercise dancing required.

"Now, aren't you glad we made you participate in the dance?" James asked, nudging Remus in the ribs. "That was fun."

"Dancing is fun when you are used to it and good at it," Remus replied and flicked his eyebrows at James. "So I dunno how to answer that properly."

"Remy, you got to get all close up on Evans!" James said and seized Remus's shoulder. "How could you ask for anything more than that?"

"I was not doing that," Remus said, pointedly avoiding that word. "I was dancing with her like you were dancing with Dorcas."

"Anyway, was that worth the pain of rehearsing that dance?" James asked, looking way too sincere.

"Yeah," Remus admitted. "Yeah, it was."

* * *

 **I was not going to make the start of the fifth year too depressing so I added a little something in there to lighten the mood. *Thank you to my friend who came up with this lovely idea after we attended a wedding like this just yesterday (only Shut Up and Dance was playing)***

 **I also forgot to mention what happened with Ted and Andromeda and their daughter so I thought this was a good way to bring them up to notice.**

 **I also decided to add a bit of Remus and Nymphadora bonding.**


	8. VIII: 50-50 Chance Of Winning

**All rights remain.**

"This is all your fault," Remus muttered under his breath.

"This is not all my fault," James muttered back.

The Marauders were caught sneaking out after hours and to avoid getting bellowed at by Professor McGonagall, they rationalized and reasoned with Filch and his stupid cat and made an agreement. So as long as they would wash the entire Trophy Room without magic, they would get away with detention and avoid Professor McGonagall's scary wrath.

"This is your fault, James," Sirius grumbled. "If you had gone down the right hallway, we would not have been caught."

James rolled his eyes, hating to admit that Sirius was right. The party of four were struggling to get through the entire room. It was not even a room; the trophy "room" was more like a trophy chamber. The room was ridiculously huge.

"Whoever's fault this is doesn't matter," Peter hissed, scrubbing away at the glass display case. "We are all here doing it so it won't make a difference going around and blaming one another."

The storm thundered on and lightening clapped overhead, creating a dim white light that lit up the entire Trophy Room. The boys caught a fleeting glimpse of one another in a different light other than the dim yellow light the single candle gave off. One look at each other and they burst out laughing.

They looked a wreck. The four of them were covered in soapy water, dirt, dust, and even ash (who even knows where the ash came from?). Then the lightening flickered back off and left them in the glowing candlelight they were all beginning to hate.

"Peter has a point," Remus said and raised his soapy rag to Peter. "Well said; I say we just focus on finishing this up and getting out as soon as possible. I don't know about you, but I at least need five hours of sleep and it already midnight."

James and Sirius groaned loudly but they went back their work without a single word to each other. Remus shot a grin at Peter and gave him the thumbs up. Working in the Trophy Room was much easier when they were not bickering.

Unfortunately, it only lasted for about five or six minutes before they were back at it.

"That's it!" James said and yanked out his wand. "Stupid Filch forgot about this! _Scourgify_!"

"James," Remus said in a warning tone. "That is not what we are supposed to do."

"Fine, Prefect Remy; I am only doing my side. If anyone would care to join me be my guest," James said, sweeping his perfectly clean corner. "Do you see how much easier and better this is?"

"You are the worst human being on this planet," Remus muttered, pulling out his wand; with a scowl in James's direction, he waved it. " _Scourgify_."

Remus watched with a deep set scowl as the dirtiness from the dust and whatever else came up in this room disappear as the spell had taken its course. It was a bit nice to see the place clean with so much ease.

"Excellent, James!" Sirius said happily and twirled his wand with his fingers before pointing it at his own mess. " _Scourgify_! You manipulated the infallible Prefect Remus! You have talent."

" _Scourgify_ ," Peter said and stowed his wand away. "Should we wait a while before heading out and telling Filch we are done? It would look a bit suspicious if we all finished this early."

"Touche," Sirius muttered.

Upon agreeing with Peter's reasoning, the four of them chose a single wall to lean against. James and Sirius leaned against each other back to back; the silence was a very comfortable one and Remus began feeling the effects of the lack of sleep.

"Oh, damn," James said quietly and plucked at his Hogwarts robes. "This is disgusting."

"Switch," Sirius suggested happily. He shrugged out of his own and handed it to James. "Here."

James beamed, pushed his slipping glasses farther up his nose, and removed his and gave it to Sirius in return. The Black heir chuckled and the pair of them shimmied on the robes.

"Yours smells like vanilla," James commented and brought the sleeve to his nose. "Why?"

"Someone had vanilla soap," Sirius said with a shrug. "How could I resist?"

The four of them laughed in response and James and Sirius resumed their back to back position. Frankly, anyone would have mistaken those two as very close brothers from the same family. Despite having obvious and very well known families, anyone could have made that mistake.

James yawned and carded his fingers through his hair. Sirius reached over his head and pushed James's arm away. Laughing, James turned around and seized Sirius by the shoulders and pinned him on the floor.

"Prat," Sirius yelped and huffed loudly. "I was just getting comfortable!"

James snickered and released Sirius; instead of moving to their default position, James curled up against Sirius's legs, using his shins as a pillow, and closed his eyes. Sirius shifted his position and grinned as he lay back down to sleep.

Remus tugged at his tie to loosen it from around his neck and curled up in the corner. Peter was leaning against the wall in the most uncomfortable looking sitting position and bowed his head to sleep.

Remus closed his eyes and listened to the storm rumble on. It was a sort of calming noise, simply background noise to drown out whatever little noise he could still hear. He honed in on the even breathing of his friends and fell asleep.

~ _"Are we doing this?"_

 _"Absolutely."_

 _"And we are going to be sworn to secrecy?"_

 _"What do you think?"_

 _"Absolutely."_

 _Remus and this girl with a vague outline of a girl whose face was blurred stood together underneath the stars. Remus, who was trembling but not from the cold, turned to face her with wide eyes. The girl had equally wide eyes as she turned to face him. They managed to go a whole thirty seconds of silence and just looking at one another. During that time, Remus's breathing became quieter and more controlled._

 _"Are you okay?" Remus asked gently, taking her arm._

 _"Absolutely."_

 _He sighed but did not relinquish his grip on her. Swinging around behind her, Remus rested his chin on her shoulder and pointed at the stars up above. Smiling, the girl's hair seemed to change to the color of a gleaming chestnut but Remus was sure it was just his eyes and mind playing tricks on him. His hands remained chaste as he folded them around her middle._

 _"Do you enjoy stargazing?" the girl whispered, craning her neck to speak into his ear._

 _"Absolutely."_

 _Together, they lay down on the soft grass below their feet. It swayed with the cool breeze; they wrapped themselves in blankets and continued to look at the stars. More than once, the girl would take her eyes off the sky to steal a sideways glance at Remus. Every time that occurred, Remus smiled softly but he never took his eyes off the stars. He never moved his position._

 _"Will you do something for me?" the girl asked, not moving closer but still speaking softly._

 _"What is it?" Remus asked in return._

 _"Will you tell me what you think of me?"_

 _"I think you are intelligent, independent, and..."_

 _"And what, Remus?" the girl pressed but she did not urge him in an unkind way._

 _"And exactly what I love in a person," Remus replied._

 _After those words left his mouth, the stars seemed to come down to earth. The light touched his skin and suddenly it felt like his entire being was on fire but yet it felt somewhat calming, soothing, peaceful. Remus was engulfed in blue as the hands of the stars took him by the wrists and guided him upward. Blinking, he followed without a fight, looking back at the girl with a sort of longing. The girl looked back at him and nodded in understanding. That was the last Remus saw the girl._

 _And then Remus was dropped off somewhere else; it looked as if he was standing on the beach. He bent down and felt the ground and as he predicted, there was sand between his fingers. Remus decided to sit down but before he could, he caught sight of four other people walking up to him. Narrowing his eyes through the darkness, he caught sight of three very familiar figures._

 _He waited for them to approach him for he believed if he went after them, they would run away or disappear. He waited patiently, leveling his breathing, and standing rigid. And then the four figures came forth and greeted him each with a warm embrace that Remus would cherish forever. The one with glasses spoke first; his voice sounded breezy._

 _"I missed you," he said._

 _And to Remus's own surprise, he answered:_

 _"I did, too. I missed all of you."_

 _The only female of the four stepped forward and placed a warm hand on Remus's arm and held his gaze for the longest time. Feeling as if he was melting in her gaze, Remus had to look away._

 _"You cannot lose your real treasure. Remus, faith opens big doors," Lily warned in a steady voice._

 _She took a step back and released his arm. Suddenly, without the warmth of her hand, the air felt colder and more lonely. He felt more recluse in the night and he longed for her calming demeanor._

 _Then suddenly, a blast of blue light shot through the night, lighting the indigo sky with its bedazzling color._

 _"How can I have faith? I have lost everything." Remus inquired despairingly._

 _"The things you have lost will come back by themselves," James replied._

 _He stepped forward and raised his chin. Despite his forever unruly hair, Remus had never seen him more serious or sincere in a long while. He missed his friends and James reopened some deep and painful wounds._

 _Another light blazed across, this strip of light was yellow; it followed the blue trail and the two glimmered shamelessly, making the stars look dimmer._

 _"None of you came back for me," Remus answered bitterly and his expression turned cold. "You never came back."_

 _"Make your own choices and let others make theirs," Peter apprised with firmness in his voice._

 _Remus looked at Peter and felt a surge of protectiveness for him. The other, who normally looked so confused himself, never looked more sure in his life. He held himself different, his posture changed but Remus could not determine what the difference was._

 _A third light stretched its wings across the star flecked night. The sparkling green light danced with gracefulness and flew alongside the other strips of colors._

 _"I don't know what to do without you; I am lost," Remus admitted, hanging his head in defeat._

 _"I give you courage. Now you can release your fears," Sirius said lastly, coming up._

 _Remus was about to shake his head but Sirius surged forward and clasped his right hand and clung on to it. Remus suddenly felt reassured, mollified, simply better. It was as if Sirius was channeling his own confidence into Remus, giving him the courage he needed to make it through._

 _And lastly, a clap of white light blinded the sky and those below. It snaked through the night and joined the other lights._

 _Lily, James, Peter, and Sirius all encircled Remus and embraced each other in a massive group hug. Instantly, from the very being of Remus, a bolt of white, green, yellow, and blue light shocked upward and touched the sky._

 _Not a moment later, Remus clapped his hands over his ears as the sky screeched as loudly as it could. He dared to look up and was glad he did for he watched the light combine into one and explode with light that blinded him._

 _Upon opening his eyes, Remus was looking at the one person he thought he would never have to ever look at again. Fenrir Greyback stood not five feet away from him; Remus felt his lip curl back. But his anger was disrupted when he felt his body shape shift back into its familiar skin. Remus was turning into a werewolf but it was quick and painless. However, Fenrir Greyback did not alter his form; he simply stood there._

 _Remus, as a werewolf, bared his teeth and let his hackles rise. Then, quite randomly, Fenrir began to shrink, he began to change; his eyes were no longer thirsty for power and domination but they were filled with fear and worry. Remus held his defensive stance but he did not move a muscle the entire time Fenrir Greyback was undergoing his own transformation. And then it all stopped and Remus's heart lurched:_

 _Fenrir Greyback had turned into a child right before Remus's eyes._

 _Not being able to help it, Remus reared on his hind legs and growled something fierce. The child looked frightened and worried so he did the only logical thing a child would do. Greyback ran. Remus perked up at the sudden thrill of a chase and hared after Greyback; his breath was hot on Greyback's neck and before the child could react, Remus had taken his claws and sunk them deep into his prey's back._

 _Greyback shouted in agony and writhed underneath the sheer power of Remus. Remus watched with cold golden eyes as the child panicked, screaming, writhing, crying. He bent low and bit the child on the shoulder hard and long. Hearing the screaming gave Remus so much pleasure, he wanted it to last forever. Biting down harder, Remus opened and closed his jaws on the child._

 _When he looked back down, he realized he was staring at the younger version of...himself. Remus reeled back in surprise and looked at himself. He knew what he looked like as a werewolf; he was told many times what he looked like but this was nothing what he looked like. He did not have dark fur and he was certainly not this large. Blinking, Remus began to realize what scared him the most._

 _He had become as brutal as Fenrir Greyback._

 _Remus cried out a low whine and attacked the mirror, cracking it and shredding it into shards. Breathing heavily, Remus could feel a calming hand on his shoulder and he turned to see a face he missed so dearly. His mother had come back for him._

 _"Shame on you," Syrena said with a disappointed shake of her head._

 _Remus could not talk so he blinked in reply._

 _"Your anger degraded you, Remus," Syrena said and looked at him with stern eyes. "You have so belittled yourself with your unwarranted actions. Is this what you became since then? What a nightmare."_

 _Remus let out a low whine and hung his head, letting the beads of blood drip off him. He closed his eyes tight and refused to open them in fear of seeing his disappointed mother for it was the worst thing to witness._ ~

"LUPIN!"

That ridiculously loud voice shook Remus from his slumber. He jumped nearly a foot in the air and accidentally hit Peter in the neck with his elbow. Muttering his apologies and patting Peter on the shoulder, Remus scrambled to his feet with wide eyes.

It took him a moment to realize where he was and then everything came surging back. He had fallen asleep in the Trophy Room no one knew where he was exactly. The thought of the results made Remus groan.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Sirius grunted, sitting up.

James protested but he, too, was stirring. Sirius laughed heartily and pulled James to a sitting position. The two of them looked up at Remus and tried to comprehend what was going on.

Remus could not answer Sirius's question, he was too petrified to see who was bellowing his name and could be heard a mile away. Peter sighed and gave up on trying to fall back asleep. He sat up and blinked blearily.

"LUPIN!"

Remus winced again as his name was being shouted. He looked helplessly at his friends, who could offer him nothing but a mere shrug of their shoulders. He covered his face in his hand and whispered a few words that sounded like an apology.

"What did you do?" James asked tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

"Automatically, I would have answered 'nothing' because that is usually the truth but now that I think about it...there is a whole list of things in my mind that I did wrong and could potentially get in loads of trouble for!" Remus said, his voice rising in pitch.

Now that he really did think about it, there was quite a bit he could have done wrong. He couldn't remember if he was scheduled to Prefect Patrol with Lily last night or tonight; that part was a bit vague. He silently cursed himself and promised that he would memorize the schedule from now on.

 _How he hoped and prayed it was not last tonight._

"What is this brave new world?" Sirius said sleepily and unhelpfully. "Go and see who it is, mate. Be brave. Be a Gryffindor."

Remus shot a powerful glare at Sirius before he started inching his way slowly to the door. Pausing at the door, he sucked in (his quite possibly last) deep inhalation and swung the door open.

Poking his head around the door, using it as his shield, he looked up and down the halls. It seemed pretty ordinary—like no one wanted to behead him—but he had spoken too soon. As soon as he scanned the halls a third time, he caught sight of two very scary and intimidating people.

His first reaction was to lock himself in the Trophy Room. He simply stood there, shoulders back, standing tall until James (the prat) came up and attacked him from behind. James's bony fingers prodded his stomach, which did not help his nausea.

"I am going to be sick as it is," Remus muttered bitterly.

"Geez, don't be so nervous," James said and gently punched him in his stomach again. "You are like...everyone's favorite."

Remus rolled his eyes, pushing James's hands away. With a mock salute, Remus evacuated the room and stepped out into the hall. There, he saw Lily Evans point at him and alerted Professor McGonagall.

It was hard to decide which one he wanted to be yelled at more. Both were equally frightening and seeing them coming at him made him even more sick. He took a step back when they approached him. The Prefect badge was definitely winking at him, mocking him, taunting him.

He felt loads worse than he just did and he actually clutched his stomach.

"Lupin!" Professor McGonagall barked angrily, storming up to him. "Where were you?"

"I was...in the Trophy Room," Remus said in a small voice, but he really was telling the truth that time.

"And why were you in the Trophy Room, Lupin?" Professor McGonagall snarled, towering over him.

"I was in the Trophy Room because I was cleaning...the room...and the...trophies," Remus said, purposely being as vague as possible; although he knew Professor McGonagall was going to keep interrogating him like crazy.

And he was right.

"And why were you cleaning the Trophy Room, Lupin?" she demanded.

"I was cleaning the Trophy Room because Filch made me," Remus answered, not quite lying yet not quite telling the entire truth.

Clearly, being equivocated was not the best idea. Neither of them were having any of it and Lily stalked up to Remus, making him shiver and flinch yet he still stood his ground. His stomach flipped again when she came right up to him.

She seized him by the tie and yanked hard, making him look at her in surprise. She narrowed her eyes but anger definitely flared in them. She grabbed his other hand on held on tight.

"Do you have _any_ idea how long I have been looking for you," Lily whispered, dangerously quiet.

"I am sorry, Lily," Remus said, trying to plead with her.

"Do you have _any_ idea how many miles I walked looking for you?" Lily snarled, curling her lip back.

"You didn't think to look in the Trophy Room where almost all detentions are held?" Remus asked, putting his foot in his mouth.

The damage has been done. He and his unfiltered mouth just threw him under the bus to get crushed. Both Lily and Professor McGonagall turned their full attention on him, glaring at him questioningly with sharp eyes.

"I might just possibly be the absolute worst Prefect in the history of Hogwarts; I am extremely aware," Remus said and winced. "It is only the beginning of the second week of school."

"You were in detention?" Lily growled, flaring up all over again.

"Why were you in detention, Lupin?" Professor McGonagall demanded at once.

"I was caught after hours," Remus confessed with his head bowed, feeling like a shameful puppy.

"Why were you not brought to me immediately?" Professor McGonagall snarled, placing her hands on her hips.

Remus just really wished he was anywhere but underneath the two people he was frightened of the most. He hated the way that Lily and Professor McGonagall were shouting at him but it was even worse when they did not bother to do this in private. He was being publicly humiliated. Perhaps the punishment would not be so bad if he pointed this out.

"We bargained for our semi-release with Filch and cleaning that room was our payment," Remus said quietly.

"Well, you and your friends can expect detention during your lunch hour," Professor McGonagall said unsympathetically. Remus suppressed a groan. She turned around once again. "I will see you in my office then."

Remus buried his face in his hands, not believing his luck.

"Great. Well, no matter how sleep deprived you are you are going on patrol with me tonight and you are going to be the one doing most of the walking," Lily snapped and yanked on his tie again.

"Blimey, Lily," Remus said through gritted teeth. His neck was going to be so sore.

"Don't do that again," she said and quickly pecked him on the nose. "I will be less forgiving if this happens again without a good reason."

Remus rolled his eyes at her subtle message and she laughed before pecking him on his lower jaw (in a platonic way!). With that, he was left feeling like he pretty much just lost that battle with little to no satisfaction.

~LATER TONIGHT ON PATROL~

"When you said I will be doing most of the walking, I did not think you meant that literally," Remus said.

His shoulders ached like crazy but Lily was being really unsympathetically. She patted Remus's chest and nudged his sides with her heels as if he was a horse. Remus shook his head and continued walking.

It was a good thing she was light because he was giving her a piggy back ride the entire patrol and not long before that he was writing extremely long and ridiculous lines for Professor McGonagall in her detention with his other three friends.

"Serves you right," Lily chirped happily. "Onward, my noble steed."

"Neigh," Remus deadpanned. "I cannot believe this."

"Just play along," Lily pleaded and tugged at his tie. "Onward, my noble steed!"

Remus, deciding to please her, started running down the hall. It was not exactly what Prefects should be doing during their patrols but when were Remus or Lily ever ordinary people? If Remus was being punished, he might as well have fun with it.

* * *

 **TIP OF THE DAY: Next time you get in trouble at school, invent ways to make detention fun for yourself *wink wink***


	9. IX: The Evening of Tall Tales

**All rights remain.**

"Okay...are we ready to do this?"

"We have been for a while," James said slowly, feeling so excited yet nervous—very nervous.

* * *

~EARLIER THIS EVENING~

"Promise me you won't get into trouble," Remus said, casting a worried look at his friends.

If Sirius was not so wired with excitement and nervousness, he would have commented about Remus's naturally nurturing nature.

"We will be fine and good," James said with a nod. "We don't have much planned for tonight anyway. Right, Peter, Sirius?"

"Right," the other two chorused.

"Besides," James said sweetly, turning his back to his friends with one hand behind his back and one hand on Remus's shoulder. "It is you we should be worried about. It is going to be a powerful full moon; also, if I am reading my lunar chart right, we are going to have a blue moon next month. October will be hard."

"I look forward to it," Remus said in a bitter tone. "But never mind me. What are you doing tonight anyway?"

"We are not going to start a party or anything," James said truthfully. "It is just going to be the three of us tonight."

"And are you sure you are going to be okay?" Remus said, frowning deeply. "I feel as if something is going to go wrong tonight...or something."

"It better be 'or something' because nothing better go wrong," James said fretfully. "Be careful, Remus. We will be here in the morning; now that is a promise I can make to you."

Remus looked very troubled when James pulled him in for one last quick hug; Sirius and Peter followed in suit and when the four of them stepped back, Remus was looking very disgruntled. With one last reassuring nod, James waved him off and Remus slid past those grand double oaken doors to the Hospital Wing.

Peter, James, and Sirius waited by a nearby window where they could specifically see Remus and Madam Pomfrey walking out of the Hospital Wing. They made sure Remus got there safely before they went to do their own thing.

"Shall we go?" Sirius asked in a quieter voice.

"Yeah," James said, casting one more look out the window. "Yeah, we can go."

Peter remained silent during the whole ordeal; anyone walking past the three of them could definitely sense something was wrong. They were walking as if they were in a trance and their faces had lost their color, making them pale.

Despite all their concerns, they walked briskly and with a purpose. They were determined to get somewhere (yet no one knew exactly where that was but no one payed them too much attention). The three of them rounded the corner and James slipped something out of his pocket. He nodded with pursed lips at the others and swung a watery feeling cloth over the three of them. And before long, they had become invisible to the eye.

With their destination in mind, they scurried to the entrance to the Room of Requirement.

They were able to avoid people and any following suspicion with James's Invisibility Cloak. And before their eyes, a very familiar and much missed brass door began to form on the formerly blank brick wall. As soon as the door's handle began to form, Sirius reached out a hand and yanked the door open.

The Marauders swiftly slipped through the door and closed it tight behind them. James specifically knew what to ask of this room and he made sure they remained undetectable. He threw the cloak off of them and stuffed it back in his pocket.

The room was surrounded by glass windows that welcomed in sunlight; it could have fooled anyone into believing it was actually the middle of the day when in actuality it was well into the evening. The room emulated a perfect greenhouse for the many ingredients they needed for the potion to work.

The potion was completely transparent; there was no recognizable scent to it either. It looked very much like water in a cauldron but The Marauders knew what they had to do.

"Read it out again," Peter said, gripping his wand very tightly.

Sirius grabbed the book and started paging to the explanation. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before he started reading.

"Place your wand in the cauldron until it starts to glimmer. Afterward, you are to take your wand and say the incantation: Emberről állatra. Az állatról emberre. Immediately following, you are to drink one cup of the potion."

" _What_?" James scoffed, his eyes widening.

"Emberről állatra. Az állatról emberre," Sirius repeated and shook his head. "I do not think this is German or French or Latin—"

"That would make sense," Peter grumbled and rubbed his eyes wearily. "The book said this entire Animagus thing did not start in France or Germany or Italy or any Spanish speaking country. And French and Spanish are based off Latin..."

"This is...incredible," James said softly. "And then what is next?"

"The explanation just stops," Sirius said and frowned. "It does not give you anything else...nothing I can see, at least."

"What happens—what happens if this goes wrong?" Peter asked, voicing everyone else's exact fears.

All three of them were silent; they did not answer for they did not know how to. They did not know the answer so they were forced back into the uneasy silence.

James drew up his knees to his chest and rested his chin on his knees. His gaze was cast downward, unblinking, just staring. He feared for his life. He did not want to permanently damage himself for life because of one stupid mistake. James closed his eyes and began to think of everything that _could_ go wrong—big mistake. His was getting himself pretty sick over it.

Sirius was tracing the edges of the book, thinking over this whole big plan. Was he worried for his life? Of course he was. Was he worried for his friends' lives? Of course he was. Was he worried about his potential future? He definitely was. Sirius bit his lip and sniffed, he was beginning to think they were all in way over their head. Was he _regretting_ this? He didn't know.

Peter was fiddling with his hands. Why did he ever get himself roped into this? He was not good enough for human transformation. He was a poor student, a failure at life, and overall a waste of space. He could not do this even if it was for someone else. He just was not good enough. He would permanently disfigure himself and he would look even worse—if that was possible.

But then James lifted his head with something ablaze in his eyes. He was the unofficial leader and what kind of true leader would submit to fear? While he was thinking of all the reasons why not to do this, he was thinking of all the reasons to do it. He would do it for Remus, his best mate. He would do anything for his friends, even if it meant risking what he had in his life. For far too long, he had been too selfish; he was going to change that, he was going to do this for Remus.

Sirius sniffed again and wiped his eyes; he was a true Gryffindor, wasn't he? He was sorted into Gryffindor for a reason and he was going to wear that Gryffindor crest with pride and meaning. He was going to be the courageous person people always were telling him he was. He was not going to cower away out of fear. He was not going to give up on his friend, who had done so much for him. Remus needed him and that was enough motivation to get Sirius off the mattress and back on to his feet with a new fire kindling.

Peter blinked and pulled himself together. After all that work last year during their fourth year—after all that studying and brewing and intense and complicated spell-casting—he was not giving in. He was not going to give in when they were so close. It was their final step, the last barrier, they all needed to hurtle. They were going to do it one way or another. He was going to impress Remus, he was going to impress Sirius and James, and he was going to impress himself by succeeding and going through one of the most difficult tasks most wizards and witches cannot even do. He was doing it for Remus.

* * *

Remus sat in that horrid dusty room, simply staring out the window, hoping and praying something would change, something would be different. His life was getting horribly tiring and how he sometimes just wanted to lay down and sleep. Where was the moon? Why did they insist on making him sit here and wait? He was being eaten alive by his terrible thoughts.

Remus just wanted to be with his friends, wherever they were. He just wanted to be anywhere but stuck in this haunting room. He hated the way he hurt himself every full moon because they refused to lock him down. He was sick and tired of coming back from a full moon either clinging to life or leaving the Hospital Wing with unhealed and unexplainable scars. He was sick and tired of people asking what had happened or staring at him or even pointing at him. He was sick and tired of looking like a tired and exhausted human being every single day of his life.

But then he realized why he was still here in the first place. He was here because he was strong enough to make it this far. Even when the Healer told him (very bluntly) not many children survive the first few transformations, he still did.

Ah, and there was his old friend.

The whole transformation was turning into a blur for Remus but he could only feel the sharp pains that made him fall to the wooden floor and writhe as if he was alive on his pyre. He was glad when he finally fell asleep.

The werewolf awoke, breathing heavily as if it had been running for miles. With its teeth, it pulled out three different slivers the wooden floor had given him. Instantly, the werewolf scented blood on the roof of its mouth. Salivating, the werewolf bent around and craned its neck to lap up the few precious drops of blood that fell from the sliver wounds. It started out with gentle licking that went to gentle biting that turned into nail digging.

The werewolf growled low but it continued to dig for more blood; and it came the more it dug. The werewolf did the only logical thing it could come up with; it drove its teeth into its arm and dragged the teeth over the arm, letting the delicious taste of blood soak its teeth and bathe its tongue.

Trapped, it was trapped. It needed more blood and it could not risk hurting itself too much. There was no way out. No way out. No way. But the werewolf needed to get out now. It needed to escape. Without warning, the werewolf threw its entire weight at the door that would simply not budge. It tried again and again and again and again. It tried in vain but could not get the door open. The werewolf was beginning to panic and it started clawing at the door, biting it, scratching it, ramming it.

The door was its way out but it would not move. Somehow the werewolf needed it out of its way. It raked its claws over the wood only to split its nail. Howling with pain and rage, the werewolf started ripping out large chunks of the door with its teeth. A loose board fell to the floor with a clatter and the werewolf launched itself back at it.

With its teeth, the werewolf grabbed another board and started tugging hard. It was barking, whining, snarling. Another board fell to the floor in a cloud of dust and the werewolf could see a glimpse of the outside. It seized another board with its teeth and started pulling all over again. But it was exhausting the werewolf; it was becoming too arduous so the werewolf needed to do something else.

 _Out! Out! Out! Out!_

That was the only thing that was screaming in the werewolf's head. It swiveled its massive head and launched itself directly at the window. With a satisfying crack, the window broke and the shards of glass fell outside or embedded themselves into the werewolf's shoulder. Its face was already marked up with several different gashes from its attack on the door but it did not hinder or even slow down the werewolf's wild attempts to freedom.

The werewolf looked down, realizing that it was stuck and stranded on the second floor of the old house. It had no way down either (the ladder had never been replaced). The werewolf was going mad; it would not allow itself to be trapped. So, it went back to the door and slammed its body against the door.

The door moved.

Encouraged, the werewolf started yanking and tearing at the door, using its teeth and claws to bring the door down. After several minutes of sheer agony, the werewolf managed to ram right through the door. As soon as it was out of the room, the werewolf tore down the awkward stairs and looked around on the second floor. In the back, it could see the smallest hint of light but it could scent the glorious outdoors.

It burst forward with new energy only to realize there was another door. But there was also a small window the werewolf knew it could break open. Without hesitation, it hurled itself straight at the glass and smashed right through it. The glass shards found its way into its skin but it was not going give in now —not after it had gotten this far. The werewolf heaved itself out of the window and collapsed on the grass below.

Exhausted, bloodied, but free, the werewolf pulled itself upward and sniffed the air. It smelled gloriously like prey and the werewolf was famished. It tore through the grassy plains until it reached the edge of a small forest. Breathing in the air again, the werewolf plunged forward and allowed the undergrowth to swallow it and its tracks away.

* * *

~PRESENT TIME~

"Okay...are we ready to do this?"

"We have been for a while," James said slowly, feeling so excited yet nervous—very nervous.

"On the count of three?" Peter whispered.

"On the count of three," Sirius agreed.

They all stepped forward and took their place around the cauldron. Before getting started, Sirius dipped a measuring cup and filled three glasses with exactly one cup of the potion. It looked like silvery water but they knew better than to believe it would taste or feel like water. Sirius distributed the glasses to each person and James, Sirius, and Peter set their glasses on the cauldron's stand right in front of them. Their wands were in their right hands whilst their left hands were on the glasses. They were ready—as ready as they'll ever be.

"One..." James began.

"Two..." Peter continued.

"Three..." Sirius finished.

The three of them plunged their wands into the potion and instantly, they cried out. The potion felt like they dipped their hands in ice cold water and it hurt. Their first instinct was to pull out but James held up his free hand with a sharp order. The three of them stuck it out and waited, grimacing and wincing.

"Look!" Peter said and nodded at the cauldron. "It's working!"

Indeed, their wands were starting to shimmer and glimmer with light. It was as if someone had taken a light to their wands and put it under the water.

"Pull up!" Sirius barked.

The three of them yanked their wands out of the potion (which was proven to be very difficult). The resistance was incredible. When their wands were out, the entirety of it was giving off a brilliant white light.

"Emberről állatra. Az állatról emberre!"

The three of them shouted it all at the same time; instantly, their insides began to crawl or so it felt like it was. It was an uncomfortable feeling but it was bearable.

"I can't do it!" Peter said with a dismal shake of his head.

"Hurry before something goes wrong!" Sirius shouted, moving towards Peter but James held him back.

"That is not the way," James warned and turned to Peter. "Repeat the incantation, Peter. You have to keep trying; use a little more wrist and less arm. Concentrate like crazy!"

Peter continued to chant until his wand started vibrating dangerously in his hand. Sirius and James exchanged worried looks but Peter was still chanting, closing his eyes and not paying attention.

" _Peter_!" James shouted.

Peter opened his eyes and looked up to see his wand quivering in his hand. Fear spread all across his expression and his eyes widened; James pointed his own wand at Peter and shouted:

" _Reparo_!"

Sirius rushed over to Peter, went from behind, and took the other's arms in his hands. He guided and directed Peter's hand but the fifth year was too frightened to start saying the spell again.

" _Say it_!" Sirius said, realizing how soon Peter's wand was going to snap. " _Keep saying it_!"

The lights of the room started flickering and one by one the windows screamed and exploded. Glass shards showered overhead but none of them were paying attention to that. Peter's wand was going wild and it was not going to be long before his wand exploded the entire room.

"PETER!" Sirius and James shouted together. "FOCUS!"

"Emberről állatra. Az állatról emberre!" Peter shouted while Sirius guided his arms. "Emberről állatra. Az állatról emberre!"

That was it, Sirius was blasted backward and Peter doubled over; when Peter bent over, James and Sirius knew the spell had worked. It was the hardest part of the process but they got through it.

"Drink it now!" James ordered, thrusting each glass into their arms. "Drink!"

The three of them tipped their heads back and brought the glasses to their lips.

James was the first to go down. He had drunk his the quickest and the effects were taking control of his body already. James, one moment before, felt as if he was drinking a ghost chili pepper smoothie. And then he passed out.

Sirius cried out but he forced himself to down the liquid as quickly as possible. Coughing and spluttering, Sirius tried to raise his arm to wipe his mouth but he found that he could not. He was the second to go down.

Peter was the last and it scared him to watch his friends go down like dominoes so he did not hesitate to swallow. He cried out and started dry heaving but nothing would come up. It was as if the potion was keeping everything from coming back up and yet it felt like the potion was burning his innards. And Peter was the last to go down.

* * *

.oOo.

Frank was coming from his dormitory and when he rounded the corner to the common room, he frowned deeply. He could see groups of students from all ages mingling with one another but he could not find the people he was looking for. His eyes scanned the area a little longer until his gaze fell on Lily and Alice. Striking an idea, he rushed down the winding stairs and skidded to a disheveled halt before them. Both of them looked mildly surprised at Frank's urgency but they stopped what they were doing and motioned for him to sit. Frank plopped himself down by Alice, who leaned into him.

"Hey, have you seen James or Peter or Sirius or Remus lately?" Frank asked with increased concern.

Something odd flickered in Lily's eyes but she was probably just looking at the fire to their left. Alice, however, sat up and shook her head.

"Why do you ask?" Alice wondered. "Now that you mention it, I _did_ see Lupin at dinner but after that...I have not seen him since. Why? Are none of them there?"

" _Remus_ was with me," Lily said, shooting Alice a glare.

Frank was vaguely aware that Alice and Remus were once seeing each other but he never gave it much thought. It did bother him but Alice sure did not seem to have been quite as forgiving to Remus.

"When was that? Where did he go?" Frank asked, looking at his wrist watch. "It is eleven at night! Where could they be?"

"I don't know, Frank," Lily said a bit impatiently. "It is not really any of our business. Besides, they can handle themselves."

"Who cares?" Alice said offhandedly. "It might be nice to have the dormitory alone; Lupin and his friends are so loud and obnoxious—"

"That is enough from you," Lily snapped heatedly.

"What? Are you sticking up for Potter? Who would have known?" Alice quipped but she was not particularly hurt by Lily's harsh tone. "I have lived to see the day."

"Never mind that," Frank said gently, placing a chaste kiss on her temple before rising to his feet. "I am going to look for them."

"No," Lily said, shooting to her feet at once. Her red hair flew out of her neat ponytail. "It is after hours and you are not going to cost us any more house points. The four of them do a well enough job of doing that by themselves."

"Then come with me," Frank said and threw his arm around Lily's shoulders. "I would not mind sneaking around with a Prefect. You can get me out of trouble."

"I will not," Lily said at once and bristled. "You are not to leave this common room."

"Now I know something is definitely wrong," Frank said and used a softer voice. "What is the matter, Lily? What are you not telling me?"

Lily only glared at him; she did not answer, she only glared. Frank was confused and he could not help but be a little hurt at this sudden secrecy. It was one of his good friends and yet she was hiding something from him. He did the only logical thing in this situation.

"Are you in some kind of exclusive relationship with Remus or something...?" Frank asked slowly and cautiously.

And to his dismay, he could see the fire building in her. To his left he could see Alice whip around and look at her sharply.

"How dare you?" Lily hissed, flaring up. But instead of advancing on Frank, she rounded on Alice. "And you cannot be angry even if I was, Alice. You were kind of nasty to him!"

"That is because he was choosing his friends over me," Alice said in her defense. "He did not give a minute when I gave him days."

"No wonder he ditched you like he did," Lily said angrily, her bright green eyes were full of rage. "Remus treated you right and you let that slip your mind, Alice. He is a good person."

Frank remained silent during this whole ordeal, deciding that this was a girl's thing and he most certainly had no right to intervene.

"And Frank," Lily said, now turning back to him. "You stay away from Remus. What he does is none of your business."

"Why are you so protective of Remus?" Alice asked, not sounding unkind, just curious.

"Because Remus is protective of me," Lily replied and smiled a little to herself. "That is what best friends do."

The two girls remained silent, lost in their own thoughts. Frank had no intention of getting himself stuck in the two girls' drama so he quietly departed. Slipping away, unnoticed, he cracked open the portrait door and slipped into the halls.

This was the first time he really ever sneaked out after hours but it was a sort of thrilling thing to do. No wonder why The Marauders did this so often. He tiptoed around the corner and hid around it for a few seconds before peeking around to see if anyone was coming.

Since there was no one in sight, Frank scramble down the corridor at a fast jog. His feet were utterly silent on the marble floor (which he was grateful for).

When turning the corner, he barreled into something very solid yet something very lanky. Frank flew backward and clutched his nose. He doubled over and groaned, positioning himself on his hands and knees. He was getting ready to cuss off the person and tell them to watch where they were going but another voice cut him off before he could.

"Frank," Lily snarled.

"Frank?" Snape growled.

"Sev?" Lily said in surprise.

"Snape?" Frank said, curling his lip back.

"Lily?" Snape asked, looking up.

"Lily?" Frank echoed in confusion.

"What is going on here?" Lily said, placing her hands on her hips. "What are you doing out here, Frank? I thought I told you to leave them alone."

"Leave who alone?" Snape said at once, looking at him with those dark eyes.

"It is none of your business, Snape," Frank said nastily, feeling his nose throbbing with pain. "Forget it, forget you. I am going back."

With that, he stormed off, heading (honestly and for real) back to the Gryffindor common room.

Lily watched him go with an irritated expression. She turned to Severus with a less stern look but a stern look nonetheless.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked, shaking her head. "Were you trying to prove that theory of yours again?"

The slightly guilty and slightly defiant look Severus shot back at her was more than enough of answer. She sighed and walked past him. In an instant, he followed.

"I just don't know what to say to you sometimes," Lily said despairingly, aware of her shadow. "I don't know what to say."

"Believe in me, Lily," Severus said, ever so quietly, but just enough for him to be heard.


	10. X: What We Became Who We Are

**All rights remain.**

 _~Sirius stood next to James who was standing next to Peter. The three of them, oddly, were in the same dream_ — _if this was even a dream. Sirius looked at James then to Peter; both of them looked back at him with wide eyes. It was night where they were standing; they had really no idea where they were exactly. Frequent rustling around could be heard throughout the night but for some reason, none of the three were afraid; it was kind of hard to be afraid of dying in a dream._

 _"What is that?" Peter asked in a quiet voice._

 _No one answered because they did not know the answer. Whatever was occurring, it did not worry or faze the boys._

 _Then, for some reason, James and Peter disappeared from his side. He was standing alone in the dark, completely blind. Suddenly, he felt more afraid and more vulnerable. He felt around in his back pocket for his wand but found that it was not there, which was weird because his wand was always with him. He felt something brush his arm and he jumped nearly a foot in the air._

 _Something rather large, the size of an Irish wolfhound or larger, was standing to his right. Sirius stood very still and did not dare to move. He could feel its breath right on his wrist but he did not even move his hand away. Whatever it was, he could not see it and he so desperately wanted to reach out and touch it but he did not dare to do that either._

 _"Don't_ — _don't hurt me," Sirius whispered in a soft voice._

 _The cryptic creature did not stir, it merely stood there. Sirius was having a hard time breathing, fearing that breathing too loudly would agitate the animal into attacking him._

.oOo.

 _James was standing alone, feeling recluse and separated, he started walking around, looking for his friends. Not long after walking in a straight line, James hurtled into something big and something very muscular and solid. Not daring to breathe, James remained in a hunched and crouched over position with his hands over his head. The breath of the thing was on his neck and he could not help but reach over and touch a single finger on whatever he had run into._

 _James's eyes widened. It was furry._

 _Knitting his eyebrows together in confusion, James placed a single hand and ran his fingers through its fur. When the creature did nothing, James reached out with both hands and placed them on its body. He could not make out a particular shape but he knew it had to larger than him. His first thought was he was petting a horse; the fur was short and soft but he could feel each muscle ripple underneath his touch._

 _"What are you?" James whispered._

 _The creature did not react._

.oOo.

 _Peter was ambling around, looking for something; he was walking out with his arms a little stretched outwards. He felt around blindly for anything but he yelped, he could not help it, when he stepped on something. He hopped off that foot immediately, fearing the worst (hoping and praying that it was not someone he stepped on). He did not dare feel around with his hands but when he moved his foot around the general area where he felt it previously, it was not there._

 _Peter was convinced he was going mad, the poor bloke. Ignoring that weird and unexplainable moment, Peter plunged forward into the darkness. When he moved his left foot, he shouted again and leaped a foot in the air. Something was definitely there and yet, he could not see what was there. He was going mad, definitely mad._

 _But this time, he actually felt around with his hands. He gasped when he felt something brush past his outstretched fingers. He snapped his hand back and clutched it close to his chest. After a few moments of absolutely nothing happening, Peter tried that again. He frowned when he felt something fluffy brush against his hand again. It felt small and it felt like he could pick it up but he was afraid of what he could be picking up._

 _It could have been a spider for all he would have known. That made his hand twitch but he forced himself to hold it out for the weird and tiny creature that evidently existed. Peter moved his hand a little but the creature had disappeared for the briefest of moments before showing up on the other side of his hand. As confusing as it was, Peter felt like it he was in no danger...for the moment._

* * *

Remus could feel every muscle in his body yell at him as he sat up. Staring at a blank ceiling was not his favorite thing to do so he sat up and looked around the room he was currently in, which was the Hospital Wing. For some reason, he felt energetic but he could not remember taking any potions. He could not remember much of anything before he just woke up. He raised his hand and realized that he was bandaged all around his middle, which was why he had no shirt on; confused and even more lost, Remus threw back the covers. He was still in his uniform pants his right ankle was wrapped as well.

Just as Remus was about to remove himself from the bed, he saw someone walking over to him. He narrowed his eyes against the sunlight to see just who exactly was walking towards him. It was only one person and it was not Madam Pomfrey. He knit his eyebrows in confusion but once the figure got closer, he recognized her immediately.

"Lily," Remus gasped. "Blimey, it is great to see you—what are you doing here?"

"I came in earlier," Lily admitted, twisting her Gryffindor scarf around her hands. "I don't know if you know this but it's already ten o'clock, Remus. You were awake before and you took the potions Madam Pomfrey gave you."

" _What_?" Remus spluttered, not remembering any of this at all—not even vaguely.

"Your wounds were bad," Lily explained, sitting uneasily at the foot of his bed. "She worked so hard to heal them the best she could. She was using all sorts of healing potions and spells but she couldn't get them to fade all the way. The most she could do was making sure they could not get infected."

Remus suddenly bowed his head, rubbing his eyes wearily, very aware that he was most definitely not wearing a shirt.

"Are you okay?" Lily asked, scooting a little closer. "Do you need Madam Pomfrey?"

"No," he said and winced as he changed his position to look at her more properly. "I'm just extremely sore. I am sorry you had to see that. Why were you over here in the first place?"

"I wanted to see you first thing when you came back," Lily said and sighed. "I made you a card..."

Remus chuckled lightly and patted her hand as she held out her card a little coyly. He took it and opened it. When he did, a song he of course recognized started playing its joyful little melody. He could not help but straight out laugh.

"You like it?" Lily asked, her smile growing wider. "I thought it was a bit of cruel humor but I thought it would cheer you up or something."

"Of course it did," Remus said and laughed.

The song Werewolves Of London was playing. And the fact that James and Sirius had discovered this song during the summer and had become obsessed with the song made Remus smile evens more. He grinned as he remembered the first time hearing this song.

~WEREWOLVES OF LONDON~

"What is this?" Remus said, folding his arms over his chest impatiently.

 _I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand_

"Seriously," Remus asked, raising an eyebrow.

 _Walkin' through the streets of Soho in the rain._

James's singing could have definitely been improved.

 _He was lookin' for the place called Lee Ho Fooks  
Gonna get a big dish of beef chow mein._

But now that Remus thought about, so did Sirius's singing.

 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London  
Aaahoo!  
Aaahoo! Werewolves of London  
Aaahoo!_

"This song..." Remus muttered.

 _Ya hear him howlin' around your kitchen door  
Ya better not let him in._

"James," Remus said, sounding very impatient.

 _Little old lady got mutilated late last n_ ight  
 _Werewolves of London again._

"That is disgusting, James," Remus said, burying his face in his hands.

 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London_  
 _Aaahoo!_  
 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London_  
 _Aaahoo!_

They really loved singing this song and poor Peter, who was trying to sleep couldn't.

 _He's the hairy handed gent, who ran amok in Kent  
Lately he's been overheard in Mayfair_.

James and Sirius would alternate verses.

 _You better stay away from him  
He'll rip your lungs out Jim_.

Sirius said, shooting James a grin.  
 _Huh, I'd like to meet his tailor_

They sang this together, very loudly and very off key.

 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London_  
 _Aaahoo!_  
 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London_  
 _Aaahoo!_

At this point they were howling to an obnoxious volume.

 _Well, I saw Lon Chaney walkin' with the queen  
Doin' the werewolves of London_.

"When is that a thing?" Remus deadpanned with a snort.  
 _I saw Lon Chaney Jr. walkin' with the queen  
Doin' the werewolves of London_.

"What is 'the werewolves of London?"

 _I saw a werewolf drinkin' a pina colada at Trader Vic's  
And his hair was perfect._

"My hair does tend to be perfect," Remus commented with a smirk.

 _Aaahoo! Werewolves of London  
Draw blood  
Aaahoo! Werewolves of London_

The three of them ended up cracking up over this song. He was a werewolf from London after all...

~PRESENT TIME~

"Thanks, Lily," Remus said and grinned. "I love this song; it is one of my favorites."

"I'm glad you think so," she said then frowned. "Frank was being extremely nosy last night; you should tell your mates to be careful and stop missing so many nights."

"Frank?" Remus asked in surprise. "He was wondering where we were; how come?"

"He noticed you were gone," Lily replied and looked at him seriously. "You should tell them to be more careful—tell Black and Pettigrew and Potter, I mean."

"I will, thanks," Remus said with a nod.

"They didn't...come round any time this morning, did they?"

"Not that I know of," Lily said and shrugged. "I didn't see them in our morning classes either but they might have been visiting you."

"I don't remember at all," Remus said, a little dejectedly. "But it's fine; I am really glad you came by. That was nice of you."

"Of course," she said and raked her gaze over his bandages. "I don't think I have ever seen something as gruesome as that before I saw you after the full moon."

"I'm sorry," Remus said, looking at her steadily. "I would have definitely advised against what you did this morning but unfortunately you have learned that the hard way—"

"Nonsense, Remus," Lily said at once, pressing her hand on his knee to silence him. "After this morning, my respect for you increased by—by so much. I didn't even know that was possible, Remus."

"Lily, you are too kind," Remus said with a joyful chuckle. "You are uncommonly kind."

* * *

James roused from his slumber and blinked. Something just felt different about him. His head felt so much heavier and why was it more comfortable to get up on his hands and knees. He looked down and nearly passed out all over again.

Sirius was stirring as well after hearing something clatter against the marble floor. He yawned hugely but his mouth felt incredibly weird. Was that from the potion?

Peter grumbled about sleep and how people needed more than three hours of sleep but once he opened his eyes to bring this up, his eyes widened. Why was everything so much bigger?

 _WHAT THE RUDDLY HELL HAPPENED TO YOU!_ Sirius shouted.

 _WHAT THE RUDDY HELL ARE YOU?_ Peter bellowed.

 _WHERE THE RUDDY HELL IS PETER?_ James screamed.

They all froze, completely at loss. James ran—no galloped—to the windows closest to him to see what was going on with him. The sight nearly made him pass out. He was not looking at himself. He was looking at a reindeer—no, not one of Santa's flying deer, he was most certainly not that!—he was looking at a stag. James was absolutely convinced he was still dreaming this entire thing. He had a stag's body, four legs, and a tail...the package. And sitting on top of his head was a striking pair of antlers. That was why his head felt incredibly heavy. He was easily twice his length and easily two or three times his weight. Judging by his hefty appearance, he was around 200kg if not more. His eyesight was crazy impressive; he had full color in his sight but he had a much more impressive peripheral vision and actual night vision. That would be helpful.

Sirius let out a bark—an actual bark—and James swiveled his ridiculously large head to see what his friend wanted.

Sirius moved up to James and blinked, looking at his new reflection. Unlike James, he was taking it much better. He was actually quite pleased with his new appearance. He looked at his hindquarters first, checking out his shaggy black fur and he even had a tail! Sirius barked happily and chased his tail. James stamped his hoof and Sirius went back to looking at himself. He curled his lip back and admired his new set of impressive razor sharp teeth. The next thing he noticed was his pricked ears; that was totally an advantage in his opinion. The last thing he noticed was his size. He was easily the size of a Great Dane if not larger. Sirius blinked and looked around; he, too, still had his human vision (color and all) but it was enhanced and his peripheral vision was much better. He even had night vision but the most impressive feature was his wild sense of smell. He could smell everything.

Peter was the last to come up and look at his reflection. He was not large at all; actually, Sirius was seven or eight times the size of Peter. Peter was, in fact, a rat. He managed to scramble up Sirius's tail and leap lightly on to his back. He looked at himself in the window and squeaked. His whiskers made everything much more sensitive; his sight, like his friends', was in color and human but he had a much sharper sense of sight along with the ability to see in the dark. His nose was keen and his hearing was superb. He even had a tail that he had come to kind of like.

 _Either we did this right or we did this wrong_ , Sirius said slowly.

 _I am really hoping it is the former,_ James said and looked at himself again. _Do you see how massive I am? I cannot get around school like this!_

 _I will go around Hogwarts as a dog. Dogs are like girl-magnets; especially if the dog is cute,_ Sirius said and barked happily.

 _Then you got the short end of the stick, James_ said then laughed (but it came out as a weird bleating noise. _Get it? You're a dog and dogs love sticks! That was so funny, eh, Peter? Hey, your name is a constellation and the constellation is a dog...you and dogs are really one in the same thing._

 _Shut up, Prongshead,_ Sirius growled but had no real meaning to it. _At least I am not hunted. I am man's best friend. I even have a tail! Everyone loves dog tails._

 _I have a tail, too!_ James said but it was barely one.

 _Mine is better,_ Peter jested and waved his tail in the air.

 _It looks like a worm attached to your arse; it's kind of adorable but that's what kind of freaks everyone out, that tail,_ Sirius said and waved his fluffy tail around. _I won that contest._

Peter hopped from Sirius's back just as Sirius put his paw down. It nearly took out Peter who squeaked and zipped with incredible speed.

 _Watch your foot!_ Peter said indignantly.

 _Oi, at least it's padded and not hoofed. That would have been way more painful,_ Sirius said in his defense.

 _This will definitely help during the full moons,_ James said and bowed his head, accidentally hitting the windows. _This is surreal._

 _We need to find, Remus,_ Peter said, looking around.

 _Oi, Wormtail; you go. I can't go out looking like this_ , James said, bobbing his massive head.

 _Yeah, yeah; think he'll still be in the hospital wing?_ Peter asked, scurrying towards the window. _Think you can break me out?_

James strutted towards the window and with a graceful swing of his majestic head, the window shattered, revealing the true Hogwarts grounds. Peter squeaked and whipped out of sight, his tail disappearing as he did. This left James and Sirius in the Room of Requirement.

Peter had no idea where he was going. He did not know where he was to begin with, how was he going to find the hospital wing? As he balanced on the little ledge, he looked around and tried to find the recognizable windows or doors but his angle was poor.

But then as if something from up above heard his prayers and he caught sight of Madam Pomfrey walking into the building with windows he must have overlooked.

Now, how to get there was a different story; he was confused as to how get from one part of the building to the other. The hospital wing did not look too far but he would have to find a number of vines or something he could use as a latter. Right about now, Peter wished he had wings.

He continued to move a little farther up and to his blessing, he found a tree branch that he could climb and get to the Hospital Wing's doors. With a valiant leap, Peter clung on with his weird little paws and stuck the landing. Grateful he was still alive, he started moving through the tree branches, weaving and ducking around them until he reached the trunk. It was crawling with wild life. What scared him even more was the fact that he understood what the squirrels were saying!

Shaking his tiny head, he rushed forward and threw himself on the branch that stuck right out to the part of the building he wanted to be. His little paws moved faster than he would have anticipated and it was as if he was almost getting used to the rat body—almost.

Scurrying down to the window sill, Peter nearly skidded right off but with a determined squeak, he pulled himself up and squeaked just loud enough to get someone's attention. It was unfortunate that it caught the wrong person's attention.

"Rat!" Lily screeched and ran at Peter with her wand drawn.

Peter nearly froze stiff from fear but Remus, bless his soul, leaped to his feet (wincing as he did so) and lunged at Lily's wand arm. Though it looked like he was nearly immobile with his ankle wrapped, he still managed to prevent her from seriously hurting him.

"Leave it alone," Remus said, looking at it.

Peter gulped, the way Remus was looking at him made him think Remus actually knew who the rat was but that were really impossible because it just happened and Remus was gone. Lily looked at the rat with a skeptical eye before pocketing her wand. Remus let go of her wrist and tried guiding her back to her bed.

"Oh!" Lily exclaimed, getting hyper again. "You shouldn't be out of bed, Remus! Let me help you!"

She gave Remus an arm and together they hobbled and limped back to his bed. Every step looked like agony for Remus but he was doing a good job hiding it. Peter twitched his whiskers and hopped right into the Hospital Wing, glad that he landed on the night stand. He hopped from the night stand to a neighboring bed then gave himself a moment to breathe. It was not easy suddenly being much smaller; being his size was much harder to adapt to.

"Where do you think they are?" Remus asked, mostly to himself but Lily heard him.

"I don't know," she said soothingly and placed a hand on his arm. "They cannot have gone far, I mean, they would not leave Hogwarts. Your friends will make their appearance I am sure of it; they are your mates after all, Remus. You should not worry so much."

"I know," Remus said and flashed a grateful smile. "They can be a bit unpredictable at times and that is why I worry about and for them. I do not really know what kind of trouble they are capable of getting themselves into and I don't think they do either."

Peter could not help but feel warmed and touched that Remus worried about them that much, even on the hardest nights of his life. He could not help but squeak a little. They stopped talking and Peter scurried backward, actually grateful that he was small enough where he could hide properly. They shrugged it off and resumed their conversation.

Wondering what he should do, Peter was kind of stuck underneath the bed, watching Remus and Lily talk. Knowing them, they could talk for hours without taking a break. She brushed her fingers over his bandages as she wore a concerned look. Remus was reassuring her that is was nothing out of the ordinary, which made Lily squeal and hug him, only to pull back moments later in a flurry of apologies.

"It's okay," Remus said with a gentle laugh.

Before Lily could answer, Madam Pomfrey (another stroke of good luck) came bustling out of her office to shoo Lily away.

"He needs rest, come back in an hour," Madam Pomfrey barked.

Lily giggled and waved goodbye as she departed the Hospital Wing. Remus watched her go the entire time until she was completely out of sight. With that, he nodded at Madam Pomfrey and got back into bed, keeping his eyes on the caretaker.

"Now stay!" she said and pointed at Remus. "You are not to leave that bed, Lupin!"

Remus nodded in understanding but he did not lie down. He sat up with his right leg extended and his left leg bent so he could rest his chin on his knee. This was the prime time to get Remus's attention, so Peter went for it.

Peter squealed as loud as he could and Remus jumped in surprise. Rubbing his chest, Remus looked down and saw the same rat he saved.

"What is with you?" Remus asked, keeping his distance.

Peter's ears and whiskers drooped in annoyance. Couldn't he help a little rat out? He tried scrambling up the night stand and managed to get half way up before Remus took his book and pushed him all the way back down. If Peter had hands, he would have definitely flipped Remus off; but being a rat had its perks. He scrambled back up with his neat little paws and scurried out of the book's way.

"What do you want?" Remus asked, eyeing the rat with curiosity. "What is with you?"

Peter squeaked but he knew Remus could not understand him. Playing charades was not an option either so either Peter would wait this out and talk to Remus with the others or stay stuck like this forever. All he could do at the moment was stare at Remus, hoping he would get some wild sign of recognition. But there was none.

.oOo.

 _What do you think Remus and Peter are doing? Do you think it is working?_ James asked, swiveling his massive head to look at Sirius.

He could not get over how different Sirius looked (considering the fact that his friend was a whole different species). Sirius wagged his tail low and started panting.

 _I don't know, James. Either everything is going really well and it is all working out or we did something totally wrong,_ Sirius said and whined. _I am kind of worried._

 _We had to do it for Remus, didn't we? If I went back in time, I wouldn't have changed a thing,_ James said and shook out his head _. If something went wrong….we will somehow get it fixed._

 _How would we get this fixed? How are we going to explain to the Ministry that were trying to become unregistered Animagi?_ Sirius asked, sitting back on his hindquarters.

 _I don't think we would explain that bit,_ James said and started licking his flank. _I think we would have left that part out. I just don't know how long we are going to be stuck like this._

 _God, I hope not long,_ Sirius said and took his hind leg and started scratching his muzzle. _I really hope not long. I want to get back to the Great Hall to eat something. I am starving!_

James watched with amusement as Sirius rolled on his back and tried scratching the place he could not reach. James stepped forward; it felt incredibly weird to be walking on four legs. He angled his head and let his antlers be Sirius's back scratcher.

Sirius barked happily, wagging his tail as he accepted the assistance.

 _Thanks_ , Sirius said gratefully and sat back up, giving himself a good shake.

 _Any time_ , James said _. I think I am most worried about how Remus is going to react to all this when we tell him._

 _He'll go berserk_ , Sirius said with a bark-like laugh. _But he'll be grateful._

 _Of course he will,_ James replied _. I just hope he is okay._

 _Me, too._

* * *

 **They have officially become Animagi. *clap clap***


	11. XI: Ready Or Not, Here We Come

**All rights remain.**

"Lupin, spare me a moment," Professor McGonagall said and motioned for the nervous fifth year to her desk.

Remus was used to shooting his friends a knowing glance over his shoulder whenever this would happen but today was different. He strode up to the front of the classroom and stopped directly before Professor McGonagall. He did not like the way she was looking at him but he had a hunch what was going to happen next.

"Lupin, have you seen Potter or any of them?" Professor McGonagall asked, raising an eyebrow. "They failed to make an appearance in my class twice now."

"I don't know, Professor," Remus said, looking directly at her. His voice sounded flat. "I haven't seen them either."

"Do you know where they could be?"

"No, Professor."

"Thank you, Lupin."

Remus walked out without another word; Lily, who suddenly has become new best mate, had waited for him right outside the classroom. She took his arm and book bag strap and dragged him around the corner.

"Yes?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"I am going mad, Remus!" Lily said and buried her face in his chest. "I am seeing the same rat everywhere I go!"

"Relax," Remus said soothingly. "I am sure it is not the same rat. You don't want to be late to Potions, do you? It's one of your favorite classes."

"No it's not," Lily said, knitting her eyebrows.

"Same difference, let's go," Remus said with a good natured laugh.

Little did Remus know, he was being watched by a rat, the very same rat that was with him at the hospital wing. Remus looked over his shoulder then rounded the corner.

It had been two days after the full moon and Remus was truthfully exhausted. He had difficulty standing at times despite his ankle being wrapped. Luckily, Lily was there for assistance and he could not have been more grateful. Despite having Lily, he could not shake the loneliness off he felt whenever he thought about his three friends.

His dormitory was only preoccupied by Frank Longbottom and Remus Lupin. Three beds remained empty. It was only the second day Remus had gone without seeing his friends, he had lasted much longer, but he missed their company dearly, especially when he was expecting them the morning he returned from the Shrieking Shack.

Potions was no fun either; he usually had Sirius, James, and Peter to talk to but they were absent for that class as well. Confused and a bit annoyed at their sudden and rather random disappearance, Remus was going to have a long talk with them once they came back from wherever they were.

History of Magic was even worse; Remus had fallen asleep in that class twice. Lily was at his side, shaking him awake. Grumbling, Remus forced himself to take notes and listen to Professor Binns go on about the wars of the centaurs. It was much more bearable with his friends and he was coming to realize how much life they gave him.

Charms with Professor Flitwick was even worse because they had double Charms with Slytherin. Snape wanted to be partners with Lily but she kindly declined, saying that Remus needed her and she needed his help. Snape was outraged at that answer.

"I can help you," Snape said, the color rising in his cheeks. "I am more than capable of doing whatever Lupin is doing but I can do it better. Why do you go to him all of the sudden? And since when do you need help in Charms? It is your favorite subject."

"I know," she said a little sympathetically. "But I said I would be with Remus for a while and I am a person of my word."

"You are making time for Lupin, since when do you do that?" Snape asked crossly, folding his arms over his chest.

Remus heard enough; he was sick and tired and done with just about everything. Professor Flitwick, who already gave him credit for perfecting the spell, watched in surprise as his star student stormed out of the classroom. He managed to get out of there was haste and drawing little to no attention but he left half of his belongings in the room, including his book bag.

"Hullo, Frank," Remus said gloomily as he suspiciously passed Frank in the empty corridor.

Frank barely had a chance to reply for Remus was already gliding past him in some kind of hurried motion. Frank shrugged it off and Remus made his way to the Owlery. A rat was keeping a close watch on Remus but it squeaked when it saw Remus cut through the courtyard and head west. The rat knew exactly where Remus was going.

The werewolf moved his hand out of reflex to grab his book bag strap but realized that it was not there. He stopped in the middle of the courtyard and turned on his heel. He did not start walking but he was staring in that general direction. He really did not want to go back but he really did not feel comfortable leaving his book bag.

As students started filing out of their classes, Remus decided to get up (from where he was previously sitting in the courtyard) and make his way to the Owlery. As soon as he cut through his last corridor, there was shouting at the other end. Usually this was simply background noise but he could not help but turn to see what had the other students shouting about.

He would have expected to see a fight more than what he turned to see. It was a dog; an over sized, black, shaggy dog that Remus had never seen in his life before. The dog kept barking but for some reason, it suddenly disregarded everyone else and ran towards Remus.

Remus was all for dogs but having a dog larger than a Great Dane running at him made him stiffen and turn his stance defensive.

The dog faltered for a moment but it came bounding up to Remus anyway. Remus, who would usually bent on one or both knees to greet a dog, merely stood until it came up and reared up on its hind legs. It was taller than him when it was standing on its hind legs. Remus stretched out a hand and ran his fingers through its course fur.

The dog barked happily and started wagging its tail vigorously. Remus suddenly realized the dog was crying. Students from all around milled around him to see what was going on but quite frankly, Remus had no idea. He just bent on one knee and started petting the dog's head and back with a bit of confusion

The dog was whining and crying, leaning into Remus; it was leaning into Remus so much, it pushed him over. Breaking his fall with his wrists, Remus pushed back and looked at the dog with narrowed eyes. His fur, his mysterious gray blue eyes—the dog barked again and started pushing its nose into Remus's hands and shoulders.

"Can I pet your dog?"

Remus looked up sharply and blushed when he ended up staring at three pairs of long and bare legs. He stood up quickly and started fiddling with his wrist watch.

"Sure," Remus said and gestured openly to the dog. "Go ahead."

Hoping that the dog would start following the girls, Remus started walking away. But to no one's surprise, the dog leaped away from the girls (after trailing his nose up and down their legs) and trotted after Remus.

"You have a nice dog," Frank said, coming up to him.

"This is not my dog," Remus said, punctuating each word. "I have no idea where it came from."

"This isn't your dog?" Frank asked, looking at the beast. "It really likes you, Remus."

"I don't know why," Remus said and tugged at his tie. "I am not some kind of…I dunno, but I don't know why. Do you have any food? Try feeding it and see if it'll leave me alone."

"I have part of an apple but I dunno if the dog will like that," Frank said and pulled out a few apple slices.

Remus grabbed one and fed it to the dog. Frank fed another one and the dog ate it happily. While munching, Remus started backing away. The dog continued to eat for a moment and Remus thought he was free but the dog started running after him again.

"This dog knows you," Frank said, galloping after the dog. "I can't explain it but I think it knows you."

"Impossible," Remus breathed and shook his head. "I never saw this dog before in my life. It doesn't know me."

The dog barked and ran in a circle; it sat on its haunches right at Remus's feet.

"Nice stray, Remus! Is this a replacement for your friends who ditched you?" Mulciber sneered, stopping up to Remus.

"Hell, who would have known you could speak, Mulciber," Remus said and raised his eyebrow cruelly. "I didn't know you had the capacity to string words into a sentence. I should be congratulating you actually."

"Hell, I didn't know you were capable of functioning without your friends, speaking of which, aren't here to protect you—"

"I do not need anyone to protect me," Remus said smoothly.

"I see, look at those battle scars you have on your face there," Mulciber jeered and pointed at the werewolf's face. "Tough, you are. You are my hero."

"I am glad you recognize a good person when you see one," Remus said and cocked his head to one side. "Why don't you try to be one yourself? It might help your poor self-esteem, mate."

"At least I don't have ugly marks all over my face," Mulciber said, his scowl twisting into a sneering grin. "If anything, if I looked remotely like you, I would be wearing a mask to preserve the eyes of the innocent. God, your face is burning my retinas."

"How sweet, Mulciber; is that your way of calling me divine?" Remus said and pressed his hand over his heart. "I am touched, honestly, really, sincerely."

Mulciber merely growled low in his throat but Remus was having so much fun, it was hard not to continue their little feud.

"What, can't keep up with me? Hm, I knew it was too good to be true. You can't keep up a conversation to save your life, Mulciber," Remus said and his stance turned dangerous. "Before you disgrace yourself even more get out of my sight."

Instead of lashing out, Mulciber's expression turned soft and he put his hand in his pocket. "I have something for you, Remus. It will go so nicely with the others."

Remus was about to retort and roll his eyes but something flicked across his cheek and blood splattered his robes. Mulciber had his wand drawn and in his other hand there was a small knife, no larger or thicker than a thumb.

Mulciber rushed at him and pinned Remus against the wall, holding his wand and blade against Remus's neck. But before he could further inflict damage on the werewolf, the Great Dane sized dog reared on its hind legs and started barking like mad.

Mulciber let go of Remus and leaped to the side as the dog bared its teeth and raise its hackles. Remus backed away, too, pushing Mulciber out of the way to make his own escape.

"Get out of my way, Lupin!" Mulciber shouted.

"Run faster," Remus snapped back.

The two of them ran into a classroom and slammed the door shut. The dog was still barking ferociously but the door kept them safe.

Both of them were breathing heavily, not really paying each other much attention. It was not until Mulciber looked around the empty classroom and the same twisted smirk appeared on his face. But this time, Remus was ready. He steadied his wand and hid it up his sleeve.

"Finished?" Remus said, looking at him with a blazing expression.

"Not quite," Mulciber said and raised his wand.

Without any warning, Remus had to dodge a flying curse that hit the door and blasted it open. Mulciber's once triumphant expression melted into fear as the dog rushed in and went straight for Mulciber's heels. One blast and the dog had to retreat a few steps.

Remus only stared as the dog went for Mulciber; it flashed Remus a look before it turned back to renew its attack. Mulciber leaped on to the desk and from there, he sprung right over the dog's vicious set of teeth and ran for the door. The dog, barking wildly, tried to run after him, but Mulciber slammed the door shut.

"Bastard," Remus said and started backing away when the dog continued to rear on its hind legs and bark.

He scrambled away and climbed on a desk with his wand aimed at the aggressive dog. The giant dog was still attacking the door, scratching at it, trying to get out. Remus watched it until it gave up and turned back to Remus.

"Bastard!" Remus cursed, but louder this time.

He pointed his wand directly at the dog but his hands were shaking. The dog suddenly let its hackles fall and straightened its ears. All signs of aggression were gone but Remus was not falling for it. He was not going to end up mutilated by this bear sized dog.

"Er—I'd really appreciate it—if you could—just leave me alone," Remus said to the dog and slowly lowered himself on his knees.

His cheek was stinging but his adrenaline was pumping so fast, he could not really feel the pain….yet. He did not pocket his wand but he did get off from the desk.

Without warning, the dog leaped up happily and grabbed Remus's wand in its mouth. With an indignant shout, Remus tried untangling his long legs but the dog was already off. He smirked when the dog looked at the door then back at him.

"Door's closed, can't go anywhere," Remus said victoriously but that went away when the dog leaped right through the broken glass part.

Remus ended up chasing the dog all the way to the Owlery; running on four legs was much easier than running on two. Remus noticed this when he kept stumbling on loose rocks. He tripped twice racing up those winding stairs. He scowled when the dog stopped both times just to make sure he was still keeping up the chase.

Remus huffed loudly when the dog sat on its haunches with his wand in its mouth. With nowhere to go, Remus guarded the dog's only way out and advanced.

"The race is over," Remus said, panting. "Give me my wand."

The dog's tail thumped against the ground but it did not give up the wand. Slowly, Remus stretched out his hand and placed a hand on his wand's handle. The dog did not move, did not do anything but stare at him.

"Are you going to give this back—"

Remus was cut off when a flash of brown came from his left and reared. Remus threw himself out of the way, ignoring his bleeding arms. His breath hitched and he could not breathe. He was staring at a rearing stag with antlers that could easily impale him.

"Oh my god," Remus said, his eyes wide and fearful.

The stag fell back on all fours and bobbed its head. It lifted a hoof and started pawing the ground. The dog barked happily and started circling around the stag as if it was herding the large animal.

Remus shook his head in disbelief and scrambled backward, realizing that his ankle was throbbing with excruciating pain. And on top of the stag's head, the same rat came forward with a squeak and settled itself in the antlers.

Remus's ankle was killing him by the time he saw the rat and he swore he was hallucinating from the pain. He leaned against the stone wall and clutched his ankle, his face screwing up to contain a scream of pain.

.oOo.

 _Is Remus okay?_ James asked, swinging his head to look at Sirius. _What all happened?_

 _A load,_ Sirius said, panting with his tongue out _. But that can be explained later. I can't go up to him; he'll go crazy and do something…bad to me or something. I think he is afraid of me._

 _Why is he afraid of you,_ James hissed, stamping his hoof. _I thought you said you would remain a lovable stray!_

 _I did but then Mulciber pulled a blade on him and I got aggressive by instinct,_ Sirius said and shook his head. _But I scared Remus, too. He doesn't trust me._

 _He'll trust Peter,_ James decided and looked up at Peter _. Can you?_

 _Sure,_ Peter said. _Lower me down, James._

Peter managed to reach Remus's hand and brush against it before the werewolf slumped forward and passed out, unconscious on the floor.

Before anyone could react, James and Sirius started shrinking.

James's legs were shrinking and his fur was turning black and disappearing. His eyesight grew poorer and his head began to feel much lighter as his antlers began to dissipate. He suddenly felt uncomfortable on four legs and reared. The stag, on its hind legs, shrunk down to a normal sized boy. James took a deep breath through his nose and realized his sense of smell was, once again, human.

Sirius's tail, which was wagging, as beginning to shrink until it was no longer there. His heightened sense of smell was beginning to lack and his prime eyesight was turning back to normal. He was losing his shaggy fur and his ears were shrinking. His four legs felt more like he was kneeling uncomfortably on his hands and knees and his tongue felt like it was shrinking.

Peter felt himself growing. His tail whipped out of sight, his little paws were growing into hands, his fur was shortening and disappearing. His whiskers were shrinking back into his head and his nose was shortening. His surroundings were becoming smaller and he was becoming bigger.

"How do I look?" James said, posing ridiculously.

"Like James," Sirius said with a grin.

"We changed back," Peter said and looked a bit breathless. "Do you think we'll be able to change on our will now?"

"Let's try it," Sirius and James said together.

* * *

Remus woke with a pounding head ache and a throbbing ankle. He blinked and looked around; he was laying in grass but he had absolutely no idea where he was. Sitting up was painful but he was glad he did.

The first thing he was the Shrieking Shack; the next thing he realized he was in back of the Shrieking Shack. The third thing he realized was he was not alone. There, standing right next to him (bold as brass) was James, Peter, and Sirius.

Remus called them something very inappropriate and leaped to his feet despite his protesting ankle. James came up to him first with a cautious sort of expression. Good that, because Remus stalked up to him and pushed him so hard, James buckled and fell to the ground.

"You. Cannot. Just. Leave. Like. That!" Remus snarled, bristling like mad.

"We have a very explainable story," James said from the ground. "Come here, Remus."

James reached up and tugged Remus's wrist and pulled him down next to him. When Remus was kneeling in front of him, James positioned one leg between Remus's knees and pulled the very angry werewolf in a huge embrace.

"I. Hate. You," Remus said, his voice muffled in James's shoulder. "I have been worrying to the point where I think I gave myself a constant migraine.

"I'm sorry," James said and motioned to Peter and Sirius. "Shall we get started with our story right away?"

"Might as well," Sirius said nervously, rubbing his hands on his pants legs.

"What are you talking about?" Remus asked, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. "Did you have a party and get outrageously drunk and had to hide from your massive hangover?"

"No," James said but flashed the two behind him a grin. "But that does not sound like a bad idea. No, this is about something else that you will probably not guess."

"All right," Remus said throwing his hands in the air. "You have my full attention….and quite frankly my concern."

This is when Remus watched his friends' expressions all change from confident to anxious and nervous in the matter of seconds. Remus suddenly felt a little sympathetic and lessened his stern expression. This did little to ease their nervousness and Remus started feeling nervous himself.

"Are you okay?" he asked, taking a step closer. "You didn't do anything….illegal, did you? Or….something that I should be worried about or….something."

"Er—no," James said, sniffing. "It's nothing like that—I hope you don't think it is at least."

"Okay, what is going on with you?" Remus asked, a frown approaching his features. "Sirius? Peter? What is going on?"

"Lily….wasn't going mad," Peter said first, taking a slow and cautious approach. "She wasn't going mad like she said she was….after Transfiguration….today."

"You were in that class?" Remus said, sounding outraged but his voice died in his throat. "Wait…..what? How do you know she was talking about that?"

"And Remus!" Sirius said a bit loudly. "I know that dog that helped you out with Mulciber. I know that dog pretty well…."

"Did you set it to go after me?" Remus said and shook his head. "That dog was….as adorable as it was….that was a bit unnecessary."

"We did not levitate you here," James said, pursing his lips. "One of us carried you here."

Remus was getting more and more confused and suddenly he was beginning to get a headache. He was just about to point this out but he saw James and blinked in surprise when he saw James's eyes water. Something just was not right because James rarely cried.

"Please—don't hate us," James said, though his voice was still strong. "Don't hate us."

"What did you do?" Remus asked, becoming tense.

James was the first to close his eyes and right before Remus's very eyes, he transformed. His body grew, fur sprouted, antlers protruded; James was changing his entire form without a wand. Remus's felt the air in his chest leave and his throat dried to the point where it closed up on him. James was the stag.

"Remus," Sirius said.

Remus turned to Sirius and watched Sirius go through a similar transformation. He watched as his friend fell on all fours and transform into the very familiar large, black dog he saw earlier today, the very dog that took his wand. The dog—or Sirius—whined and sat on his haunches, looking very nervous.

"And Peter?" Remus said, turning to his last friend. "What can you turn into?"

Peter motioned to Remus's hand and placed his own hand on top. Finding this a bit odd, Remus watched as Peter shrunk into the same rat he saw in the Hospital Wing and the same rat Lily saw wherever she went. Peter was the rat; a gray rat.

Remus stood with his mouth open, lost for words, and completely unable to think. Nothing came to his mind, nothing came into words. He was speechless, frozen with absolute disbelief.

They all turned back and Remus felt like he was going to pass out again. He kept shaking his head, looking at them in a new light.

"This….all this—it can help you—we can help you, Remus," Sirius said and looked at Remus with a pleading look. "We can help you—that is why we did it."

"What have you done?" Remus whispered.

"We became illegal Animagi," James answered.

That was when the silence overtook them, clasping them into an uneasy and depressing silence. Then Remus did something that they would not have expected judging by his past reaction. Remus came forth and hugged Peter first (since he was the closest). Peter jumped slightly but he returned the hug, glad that he was not going to be slaughtered.

This gave James and Sirius the courage to go up to Remus and tap him on the shoulder. Remus let go of Peter and threw his arms around Sirius's neck. James was next to receive Remus's embrace and he welcomed it with open arms. It frightened James at first when Remus would just stand there and stare at him.

"I don't know how to thank you," Remus said.

James could feel the other shaking so he gripped Remus's shoulder and looked at him carefully.

"We did our research," Sirius explained. "We learned in our second year that animals do not trigger the same aggression in werewolves. Peter—Peter was the brilliant one to come up with the idea of becoming Animagi for you. Ever since then we have been set on going through all—all of it for you. We wanted to be there for you."

"You have suffered alone enough, you need us," Peter said and smiled. "I think we can be a great asset for you—if you will accept us, of course."

"Of course I do," Remus said but frowned. "What happens when I attack you?"

"Sirius and I are big enough to stop you; I, unlike you, am armed with antlers that are crazy strong," James reassured. "Don't worry, Moony."

"We did this for you," Sirius said.

Thus came, from the plains of the Shrieking Shack, Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs. Here came, from the plains of the Shrieking Shack, The Marauders.


	12. XII: For You, Moony, Anything!

**All rights remain—saying this on repeat is starting to drive me mad**.

Class, he had to wake up for class. As much as he really did not feel like going to class (which was a first), he forced himself to throw back his nice, warm cocoon of blankets. Muttering like mad, Remus stood up. His quisling feet shook unsteadily and his head decided to make it feel like he was riding an angry, bucking hippogriff.

 _Oh merciful hippogriff._

"You were really gone last night," came a very obnoxious voice. "I lost track of how many glasses you went through."

James was the one who spoke. Despite having a huge headache, himself, he was still able to annoy Remus with just two sentences and it was six in the morning—only six in the morning. Curse James and his stupid chipper mood.

"Prat—shut up," Sirius groaned, rolling over. "Just leave me be...to die!"

"Now that is being a bit melodramatic, wouldn't you say?" James said, toeing the line of patience for both Remus and Sirius. "Oi, you are not the only one suffering from a hangover. I just handle it way better than you."

"Good for you!" Remus retorted and brought a hand to his hair. "Did I shower last night? What on earth did I do?"

"You got yourself absolutely hammered," James said with a chuckle.

Remus scowled but refrained from using foul language because foul language was...foul. He sighed and pulled at his shirt, noticing that there was writing on his stomach. When this caught his eye, he yanked up his shirt and stared at the words on his bandages.

 _Atlas, Demeter has risen and removed your onerous weight off your shoulders. Address yourself as thee, Aeolus._

 _"_ Where did we go last night?" Remus groaned, trying to charm the words off his bandages.

He managed to fade it but the words still stuck stubbornly to the fabric. It will be very awkward to explain to Madam Pomfrey just what exactly happened that night. It was a pity becaude he could not remember any of it.

"We went to...where did we go? Padfoot, where did we go?" James asked, craning his neck to look at his other friend. "Where did we go?"

"I heard the question the first time," Sirius growled. "We went to London and stole all the muggle mead from a restaurant."

"We _what_?" Remus asked.

"I am only pulling your hair, Moony. We went to Hagrid's and stole _his_ mead—that is the honest truth," Sirius said.

The bad thing was, after their first night of hard drinking, their voices still sounded slurred to their opinion. Remus's headache was not ceasing and he was struggling, now, to remember anything after deciding to sit down with one tiny, miniscule, little glass of Sirius's father's Scotch.

"Where is Peter?" Sirius mumbled from underneath his covers. "I bet that one isn't even hungover. He had such a high tolerance for alcohol."

"No way—Remus had the highest," James argued.

"Fine, but Wormtail was up there," Sirius said, deciding that going back to (wonderful) sleep was not going to happen.

"Me?" Remus asked, blinking in surprise. "I have a high tolerance. Blimey, how much did I have?"

"Just...like a bottle and a half—and a mug of Hagrid's mead," James said, pointing to the evidence at the side of Remus's bed.

"I drank a bottle and a half of straight up Scotch?" Remus said, aghast with himself. "How bad off was I, I wonder?"

"You hit it hard halfway down the second bottle but you were really gone when you had that mead," Peter said and yawned hugely.

He emerged, not from his bed, but from the floor beside his bed. He must have fallen off during the night and did not realize it. Remus nudged the empty bottle with his toe, suddenly wishing he did not stand up of even get out of bed this morning.

"I am going to be so sick," Remus muttered, rubbing his head. "It won't even be funny."

"Why—" Sirius hiccuped. "—do you have such a high tolerance for alcohol. Have you been sneaking illicit drinking, Prefect Remy?"

Remus groaned, completely forgetting that he was still wearing his Prefect badge. He was, without a doubt, the worst Prefect in the history of Hogwarts Prefects. If Lily were to see him now, she would punish him into the next decade.

Oh wait...she did see him...and she did punish him severely.

"Last night was something else," Sirius commented.

"Tell me," Remus said, waiting for the dreadful story. "Will you?"

"For you, Moony, anything!" Sirius said playfully.

* * *

~LAST NIGHT~

"What do you say we celebrate with a little of my father's infamous Scotch? I stole it over the summer—the idiot doesn't pay attention to me anyway," Sirius said and started rummaging through his trunk. "Here!"

The git pulled out six bottles of Scotch (how Sirius managed to get his hands on this much was beyond Remus).

"My father has like...thirty of these bottles," Sirius explained as if he could read Remus's mind.

"Then shall we?" James asked, arching an eyebrow impishly. "It was a genius idea to come out here, Moony. I love it here down by the lake."

"Yes, well—we are not having that much tonight. We are going to be alive and sober tomorrow. There will be no hangovers or staying out of class," Remus said stubbornly. "And we are being mature about this."

"Yes, sir!" James and Sirius said together, mock saluting him.

"Here you go, Wormtail!" James said, tossing Peter a bottle.

Remus caught his flying bottle, which zoomed into his hands. It seemed to be watching him as he stared back down at it. With a sigh, Remus flicked his wand and popped the cork off. Just the smell of it was strong.

"Okay, then," Remus said and lifted the bottle slightly.

"Cheers, mates!" Sirius said.

James tipped the bottle to his lips first and took a sip. He made all sorts of different expressions whilst downing the liquid.

"Is it good, Prongs?" Remus asked.

James, Sirius, and Peter looked at him in utter surprise. Remus, realizing that he must have said something, shifted under their gazes.

"What?" Remus asked.

"You called James 'Prongs'! Wicked," Sirius said.

"The names aren't going anywhere anytime soon so I might as well go with it," Remus said with a shrug. "Is that stuff any good?"

"Absolutely," James answered and put a hand over his stomach. "Although it kicks you right in the gut the first time you drink it."

Peter was the next one to try it. He grimaced at the taste but gave them all a satisfied nod at the end.

"I'll give your father some credit—he knows his alcohol," Peter said to Sirius, raising his bottle to the Black heir. "I am impressed."

Sirius, who already had some of his father's stash, was eager to try this. He took a rather large mouthful and swallowed it all.

"Good," was all he said after wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

Remus was the last to try his. He took a small and careful sip but even then it proceeded to make him squirm as it slid down his throat. He gave it the thumbs up, however, impressed with its taste.

The four of them sat in a circle playing Never Have I Ever—a game Remus taught them how to play. Sirius and James just twisted the rules a little. Everytime one of them got out, they would have to remove an article of clothing to get back in the game. Luckily, no one had to.

"Okay, never have I ever...eaten an insect," Peter said.

Sirius went down one—he was at four. James was at five. Remus was at seven. Peter was at eight. The odds were interesting by then.

"Never have I ever ridden a horse," Sirius said.

Remus went down, James went down, and Peter went down. Sirius's eyes widened and his jaw dropped in surprise.

"You lot have ridden horses?" Sirius said, sounding outraged. "What is the meaning of this? When have you ridden a horse?"

"Mate, my aunt and uncle owned several before they died," Remus said casually.

"My dad took me horseback riding," James said.

'"My mum took me," Peter added.

Sirius huffed and the latter took a pause to drink some more of their Scotch. Remus's bottle was the emptiest one out of all of theirs and he was not feeling a thing.

"Never have I ever kissed someone and meant it," James said.

Remus went down, Peter went down.

"Aha! I knew you were dating that Ravwnclaw girl, Wormtail! You totally are!" Sirius screeched and pointed a finger at him. "I knew it."

"Guilty," Peter said with a shrug of his shoulder. "It was a quick kiss, nothing more. We weren't snogging each other senseless of anything."

"Remember when Moony did with Alice?" James asked devilishly. "I remember that pretty well if you ask me—caught by Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall."

"We don't talk about it," Remus muttered under his breath. "Happily been single since and I never plan on changing that."

"I think Remus might just be the least chaste of all of us," James quipped.

His friends rolled their eyes.

"Never have I ever shagged someone hard and good," Remus said, looking directly at his friends.

Sober Remus would have been seriously blushing at this point and might have even given himself a tiny headache from the words coming out of his mouth. But slightly inebriated Remus was acting on shamelessly. Though he was not drunk—barely tipsy—alcohol was doing funny things to him.

To everyone's surprise, Sirius went down.

"WHAT?" James screeched and leaped to his feet. "Why have I not heard about this? This is an outrage! An outrage, I say!"

"It was just this summer," Sirius drawled lazily. "Besides, there was nothing to it."

"Nothing to it? Who was it?" James asked, trying to look stern but his intoxication made it a challenge.

"That fourth year...I dunno her name—but when I was out walking, I saw her—we hung out—she and I went to a huge field of grass," Sirius not finishing the rest.

"You are not ending the story there!" James hissed, taking this as a personal insult. "I want the details."

Sirius pulled a disgusted face, Peter groaned, and Remus buried his face in his hands.

"We started talking and things just got heated from there," Sirius said with a shrug of his shoulder.

"Padfoot, she was fourteen—" Remus began.

"—almost fourteen," Sirius interjected. "She was turning fourteen in three days. But she was the one who initiated it—I went with it. I don't even remember her name but at least I remember her face. I see her around here."

"Done with the details!" Remus shouted and slammed his bottle down.

"Never have I ever hit a family member," Peter said.

"Pfft, going down on that," Sirius snorted.

Sirius, the lowest one, was at two. James was at four, Peter was at six, and Remus was at five.

"Never have I ever said one nice thing to Snivelly," Sirius said, puffing out his chest proudly.

"Ooh, good one, Padfoot! Now we can see the traitors," James said and looked at his friends, especially Remus.

"If telling him to watch out is something nice..." Remus said slowly. "Then..."

"You are down by one!" Sirius screeched.

Remus rolled his eyes and put one finger down. James shot him a half hearted glare. When they were about to continue, they heard a thud. Jumping slightly, they turned to see Peter passed out in the grass with a second bottle of Scotch open and semi-drunk.

"James? Do you want to share the sixth one with me?" Sirius asked.

By this time, their voices were definitely slurred and almost inaudible. It was a miracle to know how they could understand one another. James popped the cork off the bottle and handed it to Sirius to give him the first drink. Sirius raised it in the air before drinking.

Remus was definitely drunk now—his mind was really telling him he was drunk. He had a hard time speaking and thinking and just doing regular movements like walking. He stood up and stretched his long legs, only to stagger.

"Careful, Moony," Sirius warned but it came out sluggish. "You aren't sober anymore. Walking'll become much harder."

"I'm aware," Remus ground out through gritted teeth. He looked at his feet. "Traitors...move!"

His feet simply would not obey and they continued to make it a challenge to walk in a straight line. Remus groaned and stopped trying.

"We are so drunk!" he exclaimed.

"I know," James said then hiccuped. He laughed. "That's a funny noise. Do it again!"

Remus covered his face in his hands and leaned against the trunk of their favorite beech tree.

"We—we got a...a...a...Pre..fect drunk!" Sirius slurred victoriously. "Beat that...!"

Sirius suddenly sat up and brightened; he tugged something out of his book bag. It was a small pitcher of mead. He held it up triumphantly and unscrewed the cap.

"We stole this from...Hagrid's...from...before!" Sirius said, now finding it hard to make sentences with words. "Do you want to try some. I heard it's really...good!"

Remus pulled a face but was too tired and drunk to realize what exactly he was doing.

~LATER THAT NIGHT~

"I cannot believe you!" Lily shrieked, pulling hard on Remus's collar. "What are you doing, you irresponsible idiot! How could you?"

Remus was looking at her through bleary eyes but once he saw her agitated expression, he sobered up as much as he could. Remus sat up straighter, squared his shoulders, and cleared his throat (very aware that his speech was highly impaired).

* * *

~PRESENT TIME~

"You are seriously not going to class?" Sirius moaned.

"Well, unfortunately, James—you're love life threatened to tell Professor McGonagall what really happened if I didn't show up to class," Remus said and threw his hands up in the air.

"Professor McGonagall would have no evidence," Sirius protested.

"Her word against mine—their word again mine. Lily always gets everyone on her side whether she is right or wrong."

"Touché."

Remus attempted to try tying his tie but to no avail. His fingers just would not cooperate with him. Either he would tie it backward and or just completely and utterly tie it wrong. Either way, he was definitely not going anywhere on his own. He stood there for a solid three minutes just glaring at the tie in his reflection.

James, the kind, good, and honest one came over and helped Remus through his laughter. Remus scowled heavily but it had no effect on the other.

Come breakfast, that was even worse.

"Pass the toast," Sirius muttered ungraciously.

"Not until you give me the water I asked you for five minutes ago," Remus hissed, pushing away the toast platter and holding Peter's outstretched hand.

"You git," Sirius whined. "The water is so far from my reach!"

"Just move your left arm, you prat!" Remus said, slamming his hand against the table and making several people jump. "If you make me get up for my water, I will personally see to you."

Sirius scowled heavily before pushing his plate back and getting on the table—literally with his hands and knees—and crawling over everything (and everyone) to get the toast. Remus, deciding that it would be easier for everyone (and less gray hairs), he pushed the plate over for Sirius. Unfortunately, Sirius's knee hit the edge of the plate and Remus's delicious porridge went flying in a glob.

"No!" Remus cried and watched as it landed in a pitiful pile on the floor right next to a group of second years. "That had the perfect amount of cinnamon on it! Padfoot!"

"You should have passed me the toast," the Black heir insisted grumpily.

No matter how ill Remus was feeling, he was not having any of Sirius's hungover attitude today. He rose stiffly to his feet and marched all the way down the length of the Great Hall and stalked on the other side of the table right to where Sirius was sitting.

"Nice going, Padfoot," James muttered under his breath and scooted away.

Sirius, finding James's actions a bit strange, had only a moment—not even—to try to comprehend why James did what he did for he was completely doused in ice water. He gasped so shrilly, several heads from across the room (with their backs facing the scene) turned to see what was going on.

"That is one way to cure a hangover," James and Peter said together.

The two of them looked at each other and laughed as they both screamed: "JINX". Remus was standing over and behind Sirius with a smirk on his face, one hand in his pocket, and the other holding an empty jug.

"You are the worst, Moony!" Sirius said through chattering teeth. "Even if I deserved that that was cruel."

"Team Moony!" James shouted, applauding for his victorious friend.

Remus, still looking pretty haughty, deflated when he realized he still had no water. Maybe he should have thought that through because now he has no breakfast or water and he was due for Herbology in less than two minutes—two minutes!

Remus cursed so loudly that people turned to look at him in shock. Living with Remus meant knowing what exactly lay beneath that thick exterior. They were beginning to get used to hearing Remus swear (of course it was never a regular occurrence and even it caught them off guard sometimes). He snatched his book bag, looked pitifully at his empty goblet, then snagged Peter by his arm and started hauling him away.

"I wasn't finished but that's okay!" Peter said defiantly. "This day is just so promising. I really wanted that toast—it had really good jam on it."

"We are going to be late for class!" Remus said, his legs working double time. "And I do not want to be late—"

"—and I just wanted my toast—"

"—I will get you your toast after class. We'll sprint—literally sprint—to the kitchens, get you some toast, and make a beeline to Potions! That's the plan, did you get it?"

"For you, Moony, anything," Peter muttered bitterly.

"Good."

"Why are you so worried about getting on time to class?" Peter asked, having a hard time keeping up with Remus's ridiculously fast and furious* pace.

"Because Lily will be after me in cold blood if I step my toe a single second too late," Remus explained breathlessly. "She threatened to make me do Prefect Patrol with me dragging her around in a cart."

"Wait, what?" Peter asked, sounding confused.

"Her and the other Prefects this year made the Cart of Shame. Anyone who does something wrong has to do Prefect Patrol hauling that cart around like some kind of carriage horse. I have seen it in use—not fun."

"It actually sounds like fun," Peter admitted.

"Yeah, but then you realize someone is sitting in the cart," Remus deadpanned.

In compendium, the two of them made it to the green houses with six minutes to spare. Peter and Remus spent one minute catching their breath, two minutes trying to figure out what their lesson was for today, and the last three minutes talking.

"James'll definitely be Captain next year," Peter insisted.

"But the usually make Captains seventh years," Remus pointed out.

"But have you seen Prongs play?"

"Good point, Wormtail."

"See, you do like those fun nicknames, Moony."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Professor Sprout waved her wand, which silenced everyone. They all knew the routine, gagher along the tables (made to be for four at a time) and wait for her to demonstrate what to do and pretend to listen to her lecture while in reality, try not to get beat up by hostile plants.

The Marauders had had several different moments where they nearly tore their fingers off trying to follow instructions but just couldn't. It was aberrant for they so often could do Herbology with ease. They were definitely blaming it in the previous night. When they were finally done trying with the Self-Fertilizing Shrubs, Professor Sprout made the students move them to the other side of the window to get them some fresh air and sunlight. That might have been the hardest part of the entire class. James really struggled picking up the pot but it was even worse trying to carry the plant.

"Move, James!" Sirius muttered holding the other plant. "This isn't light you know."

"Fine, you go on ahead," James said irritably and smirked.

All in all, The Marauders dropped the pot and watched it dlshatter like crazy. Remus sunk so low, he was on his knees, hiding behind the desk with Peter while James and Sirius were looking at each other—torn between laughing together or shouting at each other.

"Boys, if you cannot be mature about this than you can stay after class and clean this up!" Professor Sprout shouted angrily. "And do not even think about using magic to clean that up!"

Hungover James and Sirius groaned and bent down to start cleaning it up when she started barking at them again.

"Do not even think about starting cleaning that up right now! You are to finish your analysis and finish that conclusion!"

"You are just getting whipped today," Remus said with a dry chuckle. "I am not waiting up for you to."

"Go ahead and rub it in, mate," James said flatly.

"And you are not copying off my work this time," Remus said sternly.

"Why not?" James pressed, his eyes darted around suspiciously.

"Because you never learn anything, Prongs," Remus said and shook his head. "It is important you learn now."

"I will never use this again in my life," James deadpanned.

"You never know! Oh, Career Day Advice is coming up. What are you going to tell Professor McGonagall?" Remus said with a raised eyebrow. "I can assure you that saying 'I don't know' is going to cut it, mate."

"We will sit here and endure the barbed comments whilst copying off your answers—did you get them Sirius?"

"Just enough to make our own," Sirius said proudly while Remus scowled. "And some of his, of course."

"Teamwork," James said and gave Sirius a high five. He caught the deadly glare from Remus and rolled his eyes. "Relax, we know this stuff already—it is just pointless to have to write it all down."

"Yeah, Professor Sprout knows we know this," Sirius agreed.

After Herbology, Remus and Peter actually ran out of the classroom in order to have enough time to go to the kitchens and then down to Potions. When they bolted, Professor Sprout got irritated.

"Well, my class is not that bad!"

Every student in that classroom bowed their heads to hide their snorts of laughter.

James and Sirius were forced to stay after class to clean up the mess they made earlier.

"Give me the broken pieces and you clean up the dirt," James instructed.

"Now hang on, I am not putting my hands in that dirt!" Sirius protested, hiding his hands behind his back for emphasis.

"Oh, come on! You are the one who spilled it."

"Because you were in my way and I had to get past you, you prat," Sirius growled.

Meanwhile, Peter and Remus were beginning to slow down. The run there might have been farther than they had bargained for. They were exhausted by the time they passed the Great Hall.

"Wait, wait," Peter said, slowing to a pathetic trot.

"I am not going to be late for Potions," Remus declared and motioned for Peter to hurry up. "Which means your need for your stupid toast won't be the reason I will be."

"Oi! That toast was good!" Peter insisted and ran towards the kitchens.

It took a whole of two minutes to get Peter's dumb toast and Remus was completely unhinged.

"We are going to be late! We are going to be late!" Remus chanted in rythym with his running.

Peter was having a difficult time keeping up with his friend, who was sprinting like a racehorse.

"We're almost there! Don't look back!" Remus shouted, pushing past some fourth years.

Peter sent an apology over his shoulder before the two of them burst into the classroom. It was nearly empty. There was one student in there and it was Alice. Remus nearly collapsed.

"Did you read the time right?" Peter huffed.

"I—well, I thought I did," Remus said breathlessly. "I might have read the clock backward; I'm sorry, Peter. I might have done just that. I dunno, I was running!"

"Remus!" Peter exclaimed in dismay. "I just ran and nearly choked on my toast for nothing!"

"Typical," Alice snorted but not unkindly. "Where is your other half?"

"On their way," Remus said without looking at her. He addressed Peter again. "Which, I daresay, is more than Lily can say; speaking of which, I wonder where she is. She is always here early. This is her hardest subject."

"No, it's Transfiguration," Peter said (no one knew how he knew that). "Yours and Sirius's hardest subject is this class and James's hardest subject is Charms."

"How do you know?" Remus asked bewildered. "I never told you that so how do you know?"

"There was this time Professor McGonagall told me all of her favorite students' hardest subjects because she wanted to make feel better."

"When was this?" Remus said and shook his head.

"End of last term."

Potions with Professor Hayes was semi-bearable until Sirius and James decided to waltz in fifteen minutes late. They were looking rather haughty, which probably was not the best way to enter a classroom late.

"Why are you late to my class, boys?" Professor Hayes asked with his eyes glaring at them sternly.

"We were cleaning up a mess in Professor Sprout's room, you can even ask her!" James gasped, holding his hands up. "I solemnly swear that I am not lying!"

"Really!" Sirius chimed in.

.oOo.

"So," Remus said very slowly. "Can you show me again?"

"For you, Moony, anything!" James cooed and looked at his friends.

The three of them started transforming right before Remus's widened eyes. Ever since he learned of their new ability, he had not been able to get over what they had done for him. They had yet to give him the full story and he was thinking tonight just might be the night they told him.

"What do you think?" James asked, reverting back to his normal self. "What do you think of all this?"

"It's quite a lot to process but it's good," Remus said breathlessly. "What did you all have to do to get this?"

"We spent all last year brewing the ridiculous potion," James said and grinned. "That is what took us ages."

"The spell hurt us the most," Sirius added.

"And the most tiring," Peter chimed in.

"Precisely!" James said and turned to look at Remus. "But we did it for you and we did it right; that is why our hangover, today, was absolutely worth it."

"I don't know how to thank you," Remus said softly.

"For you, Moony, anything!" Sirius said, parroting James from before.

Sirius transformed into the great black dog and started running around the empty common room. He wagged his tail vigorously and circled tight around his friends, whining and crying with joy.

Peter transformed into his rat form and started squeaking as he attempted to climb to something more elevated. Sirius barked happily, a deep and loud bark, and bowed his great head and let Peter scramble up it.

James flashed Remus a grin before transforming into the largest animal. It was easily the size of a large draft horse but the antlers only added to the size. James bleated and padded over to nudge Remus with his nose.

Remus laughed and patted James's strong neck and flank. The dog came bounding up and skidded to a halt beside the large stag. Peter climbed from Sirius's back to James's head and nestled himself in James's antlers.

"Thanks, Prongs and Wormtail and Padfoot," Remus said again, even if they could not respond.

 _For you, Moony, anything!_ James, Peter, and Sirius chorused together.

* * *

 **Come one, come all and review! Let me stay awhile! I might just be worth your time!**


	13. XIII: A Seriously Ruined Night, Or Not

**All rights remain.**

"Do you want to go flying?" James asked.

"Oh! Oh! Prongs! Oh! Guess what?" Sirius said, jumping on his bed happily. "Guess what, guess what? They came out with a better broom!"

"What?" James screeched, earning a well-rounded glare from Lily Evans from across the common room. "What is this? What is it? It's about time! What is it, Padfoot? What is it?"

"Be quiet, Potter! No one cares about that load of rubbish!" Lily shouted, sticking her nose back in her book. "Keep it down, I am Prefect and I demand a quiet tone for the common room. Some people are trying to study."

"Well, you aren't," James said, raising an eyebrow. "So why are you yelling at me, Prefect Evans?"

"I am studying, or trying to!" Lily snarled, standing up. Her friends tried to push her back down.

"No, you are trying to talk to me," James said and stood up as well. "I am blushing; you are finally taking time for me. Go on a date with me, Evans? Go one, agree."

"Never!" she hissed, seized her things, and stormed away.

Apparently no one else thought it was just a load of rubbish; people from all over were coming to see what Sirius was screeching about. The two of them, together, looked at the article that was posted right on the front cover of the advertisement. Everyone else was crowding around to see what had them in such a loud state (even if they usually communicated with loud voices).

"I cannot believe this," James muttered, running a hand through his messy hair. "The new Comet 260 is out and the best racing broom yet."

"What is this?" Sirius said, wide eyed. "We need this broom!"

"Okay, we need to schedule a time where we can go and get it," James said, nudging Sirius's shoulder. "Oh! I've got it! Maybe we can go during Christmas break or sneak out by Floo or something! Oh! We can convince Professor Minnie to let us go because it will increase our chances of winning the Cup this year!"

"Good one, Prongs," Sirius said and nudged James back. "But we need to come up with something really convincing. I dunno if I am even going home for Christmas. My parents haven't said anything yet."

"Which means...?" James asked, his grin growing slowly.

"Which means I technically do not have to go home!" Sirius said and broke out into a full grin. "That means we can hang out on Christmas and get these new brooms!"

"Wormtail? Moony?" James asked, craning his neck past the crowd to find his friends. "What do you think? Are you able to stay a while with us over the holiday break?"

"I'm sure," Peter said and nodded. "But you might want to check if your own family has any plans, eh Prongs?"

"Probably," James said with a shrug. "I'll send an owl over to them sometime this week. What about you, Moony?"

"I'm sure," Remus said vaguely, looking out at something else. "I'll definitely be able to see you over break. I dunno when though."

"Don't worry," James said and roughly pushed past everyone else with Sirius. "Something else is on your mind, Moony. What's going on?"

"Nothing," Remus said and stood up abruptly. He stretched and yawned. "I am just going to get some sleep—I haven't been sleeping well."

"Oh?" Sirius asked, knitting his eyebrows in concern. "Is it my fault? I swore I stopped talking in my sleep ages ago."

"No, you're free of blame, Padfoot," Remus said with a graceful chuckle. "It has nothing to do with you and your weird habit of sleep-talking."

With that, Remus departed, leaving a confused Sirius and a ruffled James. Peter, who seemed to be the only one who understood (bless his soul), stood up and raced towards the dormitory after his friend. James was about to call out but Peter was already gone.

"Wonder what's gotten into them," James said with a shrug. "Remus didn't look sad or anything or bothered—just kind of bored or something."

"I dunno, he is hard to read sometimes...but I agree with you there," Sirius said with a yawn. He curled up on the couch. "But I dunno...I am kind of tired, too."

Whatever they were saying, it trailed off until none of them were speaking. They both had fallen asleep; Sirius was on the couch and James was in the chair with the foot rest. They were sleeping rather peacefully and quietly. Upstairs, Remus and Peter were sleeping, passed out from exhaustion that had hit them early on.

They had no idea why they were so tired but their day must have been stressful. Transfiguration was no fun but it was definitely bearable. Charms, in James's opinion was an utter waste of time. Care of Magic Creatures was impossible to like. No one liked bowtruckles and hardly anyone really payed attention to what the professor was saying (but when does anyone really ever do anyway?). Divination with Professor Fultern was ridiculous—The Marauders fell asleep (sans Remus, of course). Potions was dreadful in Sirius, Peter, and Remus's opinion. It was their hardest class after all. Luckily, they did not have Herbology because that would have been a disaster, too.

All four of them were sound asleep until they heard a loud and painful thud from, what it seemed like, the common room. James and Sirius, who were already down in the common room, jumped awake and looked over their chair and couch to see what was going on.

Remus and Peter, who were formerly asleep upstairs, hurled themselves downstairs to see what had happened. When they reached the bottom of the winding stairs, they saw a group of very angry first years fighting on the floor.

There was a large group of Gryffindors that crowded around to see the brawl. Of course, nowadays, eleven year olds were becoming stronger and their violence was reaching its breaking point. Remus slid past Peter and he and Lily forced their way over. Who knows where the Head Boy and Girl were?

"Stop it!" Lily said shrilly, pulling the boys apart singlehandedly. "What has gotten into you? Fighting each other and fighting physically? That is against the rules and that is so unacceptable! Thirty points from each of you!"

Remus felt like he should have said something but Lily seemed to be handling it quite well. That was...until she decided to rope him into it, as well.

"We are reporting this to Professor McGonagall and you both can explain to her why you have bruises on your faces. Remus and I will take you right now!" Lily said sternly, not giving in on her stoic expression once. "Right Remus?"

"Absolutely," Remus said but he sounded much less scary when he spoke. "I am sure she would want to hear about this."

Peter, James, and Sirius all watched in surprise as Remus put his Prefect figure to work. They had not really ever seen Remus do his Prefect job to the extent of yelling at people so it was more than a little fascinating to watch.

Lily marched while Remus strode next to her. In front of the two Prefects were the two boys who were fighting. Their heads were bowed for being publicly yelled at in front of the entire Gryffindor House and they were taking the walk of shame to Professor McGonagall's office.

"You think I was a bit too harsh?" Lily asked, leaning over to quietly whisper this to Remus.

"I dunno," Remus said with a shrug. "I suppose you were a bit hard on them but I suppose that was what they needed."

"They all just need a firm hand," Lily said with a little smile. "What do you think? How do you think I am doing as a Prefect?"

"You're doing great, Lily," Remus said happily. "I would not have questioned your authority after that."

"Good," she said with a humored laugh.

The four of them walked to Professor McGonagall's main office and knocked swiftly on her door. It was not long after that she opened the door ever so slightly. She caught sight of Remus and immediately rolled her eyes in response.

"Lupin, if you are going to tell me you and your mates did something you can't fix again—"

"No, Professor," Remus said quickly. "That only happened once. No, Lily and I are on Prefect duty and caught these two fighting in the common room."

Professor McGonagall opened her door a little further and saw the two first years with bloody lips and noses and bruises all around their faces topped off with a few scratches. She looked at them sternly and frowned deeply.

"Fighting is not tolerated at Hogwarts, Raze and Cedar," Professor McGonagall said and shook her head. "You two can stay here while I give them their detentions."

The boys followed her into her office while Remus and Lily stayed outside in the corridors. They leaned against the opposite wall of the door and sunk to the floor. There was a brief moment of silence in which no one spoke, then Lily did.

"I am not sorry I yelled at Potter," Lily said slowly. "But I am sorry for yelling the wrong things at him. It was rude of me."

"He'll forgive you—he probably already has," Remus said reassuringly. "What was all that anyway? You looked at bothered at something."

"I was!" Lily said exasperatedly. "It's my sister, Petunia. She is driving me mad but I love her so much and I refuse to let her go."

"What?"

"I want to see her again, I want to hear her again. I want to remind her that we are still sisters and that I will love her no matter what. I want to make sure she remembers that she doesn't like cinnamon on her toast and she only likes grape jelly. I want to sit down with her on the couch and relive our best memories. I want to watch our old family tapes my dad used to make when we were younger and watch them with her and eat popcorn and laugh. She was such a cute baby. I want to tell her that she is the best older sister ever."

Lily paused to take a break, tears pricking her green eyes.

"I want her to stop calling me a freak. I want her to stop hating me because I am different than her. I want her to stop thinking we are not equals—I am pretty sure she thinks I am so much better than her deep down but on the outside she acts like she is so much better than me. I want her to stop thinking I left her selfishly. I always think of her...every day I think of her. I want her to stop thinking I am no longer her best friend. I will always be her best friend. I want her to stop calling all of my other friends freaks because it is so rude."

Lily was now ranting like mad and she was talking in such a flurry, it was hard to hear what she was saying. Her shoulders were shaking and she was busily wiping her eyes on her hands.

"Lily," Remus said soothingly.

"And I want her back!" Lily finished and buried her face in his shoulder. "Where is she, Remus? Where is Tuney? The one that was my best friend?"

"She's still around," Remus said quietly. "She is still there, I know it."

"Why is she hiding?" Lily asked, sniffling.

"Maybe she is afraid to come out," Remus answered softly. "She is afraid of hurting herself more than hurting you."

"Okay, Evans? Lupin? They are all set so—"

She stopped abruptly when she caught sight of the two cuddling in the corridor but she regained her posture and continued:

"They are all ready to go back," she finished rather lamely. "Off you go Cedar and Raze. And if I ever hear this again, the punishment will be much more severe."

Both Remus and Lily rose to their feet; the first years, who have tamed their inner beasts, followed at a much easier pace than they had come. Lily and Remus walked behind them hand in hand. If James were to see this, he would have suspicious and downright livid. Anyone would have mistaken the two as couples (and some did, much to James's outrage) but they would always refuse and say they were in love with their friendship.

"Thanks," she whispered ever so subtly. "I don't know where I would be without you."

The two made the quick trip back to the Gryffindor Tower and herded the first years inside the portrait hole. The Fat Lady was not too particularly pleased for being woken so abruptly from her sleep but she softened at the sight of Lily...she was not a fan of Remus.

"And what do you want?" the Fat Lady asked, eyeing Remus with annoyance.

"Night worm," Lily said. "The password."

"Oh, good gracious Lily! How nice to see you. I do love your hair, I can never get over it," the Fat Lady gushed. "Oh, that is correct by the way."

"Thank you!" Lily said as she entered.

The Fat Lady glared at Remus when he climbed through...figures. She had to watch James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter sneak out countless of times. That might have been a contributing factor as to why she disliked him.

"I'm going up," Remus said after they had the chance to talk.

"Oh," she said, a little disappointed. "I thought we could take one last walk around the castle, you know? For Prefect Patrol."

"Oh," Remus said very quickly and turned a bit red. "Of course we can. I'll be happy to go with you."

"Thanks."

The two of them slipped back out and hurried through the first corridor. The first place they stopped at was their favorite portrait of the sky where there were birds flying through. Below the sky, stretched high, were mountains. Surrounding the mountains was a large open field of swaying grass that moved with the wind. In the grass harvesting was the very early Natives. Their horses nibbled on the grass and grazed while they worked happily in the fields.

"It makes me wonder...if, with the murder counts rising, people get to enjoy life as it is. Do you think they do, Remus? Are these people suffering because of the new threat against the entire Wizarding World?" Lily asked, tugging at his sleeve.

"I know you don't want to hear it but Sirius's family is all for this new movement against the Ministry but Sirius is different. He's not like his family."

"No, I know," Lily sighed, almost in defeat. "If you say he is a good person, I'll believe it. I just wish he'd start acting like it."

.oOo.

"Where is Moony? I'll get him, I swear I will," James muttered, pacing the dormitory.

"He's probably on Prefect Duty still," Peter said with a yawn. "We promised we would be studying. Why aren't you doing that, Prongs?"

"Yeah, relax," Sirius said with a chuckle. "You are acting like an overprotective mother. You remind me of my aunt that one time...she wouldn't let her children paint because she thought it was going to poison her stupid kids. I had to paint alone."

"Who was that?" James asked, arching an eyebrow.

"I dunno, some irrelevant relative that I probably hated anyway," Sirius said with a shrug. "Anyway, Moony said he'd be out for a while. We'll give him till midnight and if he is not back by then, then we'll start to panic."

"That is the worst plan, Padfoot," James deadpanned.

"But it's the most logical," Peter said wisely from his bed. "You're just jealous because Moony's spending all that time alone with Evans."

"Come off it, Prongs. You know he's too sensitive to do anything with her—plus you can trust him, he's a good bloke."

"I'm aware, I know," James said, running his hand through his hair. "Are you sure we shouldn't just quick go and look for him?"

"Where would we look?" Peter asked in disbelief. "I can't believe you sometimes. He's fine! Besides, isn't it after hours? Remus will just get annoyed that we are breaking school rules."

"Come off it—he wasn't mad at us for breaking the law," James said with a snort.

"Touché."

"Oi, Wormtail, Prongs. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Sirius asked with his eyebrows raised. He wore an impish grin.

"I hope," James said.

The three of them raced outside under James's Invisibility Cloak. When they reached the great outdoors (undetected) they threw the cloak off, rushed into the Forbidden Forest, and transformed into their Animagi form.

Sirius barked happily and ran in circles while James reared on his hind legs and tossing his head. Peter scurried up a tree and looked down on them from a low hanging branch that just reached the top of James's pricked up ears.

Sirius barked again, hopping up and resting his two forepaws on the trunk of the tree. As soon as he opened his mouth to bark again, something caught his scent glands and he quickly picked up on that. His ears pricked for noises of the forest and he stiffened from nose to tail.

 _You smell that, too, right?_ Sirius asked, dropping back on all fours.

 _Should we transform back and run for it?_ Peter asked, looking from above.

 _Not at all, we are safer like this_ , James answered this time and pawed the grass. _But I do know what you mean. I smell it, too_.

 _Should we head back?_ Sirius asked, wagging his tail low.

 _No, I don't think so_ , James decided and turned to Peter. _You better get on my back and hang on, Wormtail._

What's going on? Peter asked, hopping nimbly from the branch to James's antlered head. He clung on with his tiny paws and tail. _What's wrong?_

 _Something is definitely wrong, can't you smell straight?_ James quipped but he sounded worried.

 _Actually, it's vague but it smells like a horse. I would know, I went riding before,_ Peter said and shook his head. _Let's go_.

 _Er—all right then,_ James said and started to turn around.

Sirius, who never acted out aggressively in front of James or Peter, bared his teeth and nipped hard on James's foreleg. A tiny trickle of blood slipped down from a small puncture wound. James bleated angrily and bared his (rather flat) teeth but swung his head low as if he was warding Sirius off. The dog growled low and nipped again but missed. James was outraged.

 _What are you doing?_ James snapped, craning his neck to lick his wound. _What was that for?_

 _I am saving your life,_ Sirius muttered darkly, baring his teeth at James. _Never turn your back. It makes you incredibly vulnerable._

Just as James was about to reply, two sets of pounding hooves resounded throughout the forest. They had run into centaurs. Peter stood tall on James's back and chittered angrily. Sirius's hackles rose and he exposed his teeth, bristling. James threw his head up and down, emphasizing their biggest weapon, his incredibly strong set of antlers; he laid his ears back, eyes rolling.

 _Who are you?_ the dark centaur demanded.

 _A dog, a stag, and a rat,_ Sirius snarled, curling his lip back even more.

The centaurs came rushing at them with no further warning or explanation. Something had the centaurs on edge tonight and unfortunately, they were the ones to get the full blow of it. Sirius lunged at the closest and locked his jaws around the centaurs foreleg.

With surprising agility, the centaur threw Sirius off and changed course to pursue the dog. A thrill raced through Sirius as he took on his challenger. This was exactly what he needed tonight to expel all of his frustration and anger. But it turns out, the centaur was a much more formidable fighter and Sirius was taking the challenge poorly.

He tried fastening his jaws around the centaur's arm but something struck him hard in the head. Howling with pain, Sirius shook the blood from his eyes and he went for a second attack. The centaur was definitely larger than him but not by much. Sirius decided that his claws were mighty useful, too.

He slid behind the centaur for the briefest of moments and was able launch himself on to the centaur's back and claw away the fur was much as possible. Pretending like he was digging a hole in the grass, Sirius sank his teeth and claws in the neck and shoulders.

James was fighting the other a few feet away. He was having more success for he was larger than the centaur and was armed with antlers that constantly gauged his enemy. The centaur bellowed but kept coming back, stabbing James in random places but the centaur hit him accurately every time. James winced and would only charge with more ferocity. The centaur went down when antlers connected with head.

The other centaur, who was fighting Sirius, keeled sideways and threw Sirius off his back. The dog shook out the blood that seeped from different places and growled in warning. James charges straight at Sirius's opponent with his head bowed low but the centaur vacated the premises.

 _They'll be back, we have to go!_ James panted.

Sirius did not even have the energy to respond, he had no idea how James's was still going. The three of them launched out. If the thicket at the same time they transformed back into their human forms and hid under James's cloak.

In human form, they were cut up, bruised, and bloody. James was sporting the worst injuries but they were all suffering from their injuries. Even Peter, who was the one to jump on James's attacker and distract him while James, went in for the second attack. It worked perfectly but Peter was chucked pretty hard and slammed into a tree.

Peter was just glad he wasn't trampled.

.oOo.

Remus and Lily were walking together on the first floor of the castle until they were interrupted by someone they did not expect to see out. Remus, at first, wanted to give this person detention for being out after hours but Lily said it would only be sensible to dock points. Remus got the pleasure to do so.

"You just lost your House twenty points," Remus said.

And sure enough, the hourglasses with the crystals went down by twenty. Snape was more than outraged and turned to Lily for her support.

"Twenty points, Lupin? You're pathetic," Snape snarled, growing angrier by the minute.

"That is another five points for insulting the Prefect," Remus said with a subtle smirk. "Mind your attitude, Snape."

"You actually called me Snape," Snape said, almost in surprise. "I almost feel bad for calling you an orphan."

"All right, Snivellus. That is another three points off—see? I only took three off because I called you Snivellus so it was fair," Remus said and crossed his arms over his chest. "Anything else you would like to say?"

"Nothing," Snape said through gritted teeth. He turned to Lily next. "I need to talk to you—it is about something I do want Lupin to hear."

"Wow, I love the secrecy," Remus muttered bitterly.

"Remus? You wouldn't mind, would you?" Lily asked softly.

"Are you serious?" Remus said, wincing as he used Sirius's stupid name pun. "Where am I supposed to go?"

"Take a long walk off a short cliff," Snape sneered.

"Three more points," Remus said and smirked. "If I were you, I would be wise to stop insulting me because you need to learn respect."

"You can't abuse the power!" Lily exclaimed. "For being civil, Snape, I am rewarding you five points. Okay?"

"Whatever," Remus said. "Where am I supposed to go, Lily?"

"I dunno, go back to the kitchens, yeah? I will meet you there," she said.

"And if you try to listen in on our conversation, I will know," Snape said and pointed at Remus. "Now go away, Lupin."

"Never you mind," Remus snapped and turned down the corridor.

It was funny because Snape watched him turn two different turns, which meant he was two corridors away. There was no way he was going to overhear them talking...or so Snape thought.

Remus remained standing where he was told to and cast out his enhanced hearing. He honed in on the two's conversation and listened carefully. There was scratching of a quill against parchment. Snape was writing down what he had to say just in case.

"I know your theory," Lily suddenly said, exasperatedly. "But I can assure you it does not matter whether you are right. How are you going to prove it?"

"Write down your response, Lily! Don't say it!" Snape said.

There was more scratching of the quill and absolute silence. Remus tried to distinguish the different scratching noises but failed to do so. Instead, he just hoped he could hear what they were going to say next.

"I wish you would stop being so rude to my friends," Lily said.

"Since when is Potter—"

"I am not talking about them—"

"Are you sure?"

"I am positive."

"I know there is something odd..."

Remus scoffed to himself and rolled his eyes. "I am the odd one here, Snape?"

"He's not a werewolf so drop it!" Lily burst out angrily, sounding very convincing.

Remus nearly had a heart attack right then and there. Snape was beginning to suspect something and it frightened him to the core to think if Snape figured out his condition. It would be a disaster. Remhs felt his jaw drop; never, would he think would ever have to worry about Snape discovering his secret.

Was he really that intrigued with them?

Remus shuddered and started backing away but his subconscious mind told him he should not ditch Lily on her own, so he dug his heels into the ground and did not move. Just as he moved his hand a little ways down the hallway wall, she came round the corner and raised her eyebrows. Remus could not keep silent.

"Is he serious? Ignore that pun!" Remus blurted out and winced as Lily's expression changed.

"Excuse me?" Lily asked, narrowing her eyes. "What are you talking about, Remus?"

"I am talking about Snape! Why is he so obsessed with us anyway? It's not even normal," Remus said indignantly.

"He—you—you came back to listen!" Lily said with a frown. "I thought you said you would stay there!"

"I never broke my promise, Lily. But you cannot underestimate what werewolves have—that includes enhanced abilities—especially to hear," Remus said roughly and shook his head. "I could hear you loud and clear from two corridors away."

"You have enhanced hearing?" Lily asked, aghast.

"That I do," Remus said stonily.

"Sorry," she muttered at once. "I probanly sounded pretty bad right there—do you want to go back? I assume you do..."

"I wouldn't mind getting some sleep," Remus said earnestly.

"Will you still walk with me?" Lily asked cautiously.

Remus looked around as if he was looking for Snape (even if Remus knew that Snape left a while ago) then nodded, a bit confused.

"Who else was I going to walk with?" he asked, gesturing grandly to the empty corridor. "I only would want to walk with you."

"Good," Lily said and smiled. "Most girls would find this very confusing, Remus. It is a good thing I know you."

"What does that mean?" Remus asked, turning another corner.

"It means you are sending mixed signals. Luckily you are to a person who can read you like a book, Remus," Lily said with a heaved sigh.

When they finally made the trip back to the seventh floor, they hurried through the portrait hole (after waking up a very ingrateful fat lady), they looked at each other a bit awkwardly and stood uncomfortably.

"Night, then," Remus said in conclusion.

"Night," Lily echoed.

"And Lily," Remus said quickly. "Thanks for not telling him."

"Of course," Lily replied with a nod of her head. "Good night, Remus. I will see you tomorrow."

She started walking up the winding stairs but she stopped right before they would both turn out if sight. She cleared her throat and stopped Remus in his tracks.

"And Remus?" she said a bit slowly. "Tell Potter I'm sorry for snapping off earlier. I was probably looking like a prat."

"You did," Remus said with a chortle. "I'm only joking but I will."

"I'll...give him...a proper apology tomorrow...on my own..." Lily said as if it was one of the hardest things she could ever say.

She watched Remus chuckle softly before waving good night to her. She sighed and hurried up the stairs, ready to finally get the sleep she definitely deserved.

* * *

 **Hello! I have a favor for anyone who is willing to help. I know next to nothing about weddings and I really would like to be educated via someone and not the internet (because that is no fun). I specifically refused to research wedding stuff on the internet because I was seriously hoping someone could just tell me what everything means at a wedding.**

 **Like...what is a bachelor party? Who organizes a bachelor party? What about for the wife? Why can't the wife and husband see each other before the ceremony? Oh, what is the difference between bridesmaids and the Maid of Honor?**

 **I can tell you a load about medicine, politics, the economy, History, and other stuff. Weddings just isn't in my dictionary.**


	14. XIV: The Moon Decides The Fate

**All rights remain.**

The month of September finally ended on a good note. But that was only the first month of school. They still had several more to go. But no one could ever hate October for it was one of the most exciting holidays Hogwarts has ever seen. Halloween was loved by everyone, regardless of what time and regardless of where. Although, Halloween was especially good at Hogwarts; James could not be more excited.

"I couldn't hate Halloween or October in general if it was my last day on earth!" James said happily.

"Oi, the full moon is on October," Sirius said unhelpfully.

"Don't we all know that?" James snorted and turned to address Remus. "This is our first full moon, Remus. Aren't you excited, Moony?"

"Excited is one word," Remus said bitterly from behind the Daily Prophet. "Hang on, look at this. A muggle family is reported missing with three missing children. The muggle police are going wild trying to look for them."

"How long have they been missing?" Peter asked curiously.

"For three days," Remus said with pursed lips. "That is the same time some of the Ministry attempted the arrest of the Lestranges."

"The Lestranges?" Sirius echoed, turning very sharply. "As in...the Lestrange pure-blood family; when has this been a thing?"

"Three days ago, apparently if not a bit longer," Remus said, looking over the rim of his goblet. "But the ad for the Comet 260 you were looking at is in the Daily Prophet."

"That's old news, mate," Sirius said happily, scooping into his potatoes. "We already made arrangements when to get them and everything."

"Hmm," Remus hummed. "Don't you feel so organized, Padfoot? It's getting a bit late so I am going to head out soon. I will see you in the morning."

"Don't you know, Moony?" James said with grin. "We'll be meeting you in the Shrieking Shack."

"Right, about that..." Remus said and stood up. "I don't know if you should go tonight; it's going to be kind of a bad moon tonight. Plus, there is a blue moon this month..."

"Stop whatever you're talking about," Sirius said seriously. "We had this planned for ages. We will be there tonight, so go to the Hospital Wing like there isn't anything illegal going on and we'll meet you over there as soon as possible."

"Right..." Remus said unconvinced.

"Go!" James said with a chuckle.

The Marauders split in different directions, one going to the Hospital Wing and the other three went for the courtyard by Hagrid's Hut.

Remus saw Madam Pomfrey standing outside. Evidently she was waiting for him and from the looks of it, he had done something wrong. Sighing with patience and a bit of guilt, Remus hurried over to her and waited for the castigation. Not a moment later, Madam Pomfrey pounced on him with her usual interrogations.

"Lupin, I have to say you have been acting rather differently; is something wrong?"

"No, nothing," Remus said a bit sharply. "Nothing is going on."

"You're friends know about you...right?"

"Right..."

"You and your friends aren't planning on...doing anything?" Madam Pomfrey asked slowly and cautiously. She was eyeing him carefully.

"No," he said a little too quickly.

"Well, then I have no reason to stand here and wait; are you ready to go?" she asked, looking at her wrist watch. She took out her wand and illuminated the tip. "The weather's pretty nice."

"I suppose," Remus said with a little shrug. "It'll be a cooler or so I have heard."

"Did you hear about—"

"—the Blue Moon?" Remus finished, guessing on a wild limb. "Yeah, it's kind of been the top of our talk this month."

"I just recently read an article in the Daily Prophet about different kinds of newly invented potions to help give the drinker strength," Madam Pomfrey said looked at him. "That is what I plan on making for you from now on, are you willing?"

"I am willing to try anything to appease the pain," Remus said honestly and halted slightly when he caught sight of the tree. "I'm ready."

Madam Pomfrey froze the tree with a wave of her wand, using a silent incantation (that Remus knew he would have trouble doing in his sixth year). Remus waved to her, trying to keep his spirits up, and disappeared into the base of the trunk. After Madam Pomfrey got a good distance between her and the flailing tree, she mobilized the tree and went back to Hogwarts, looking very natural doing so.

Little did she know that there were three students watching her from underneath the Invisibility Cloak.

* * *

James nudged Sirius, who passed on the message by nudging Peter. Peter rolled his eyes and transformed into a rat, shrinking down in size. Sirius had to mind his feet to not step on his friend.

With a squeak, Peter rushed out from underneath the tree and stopped, realizing that he had absolutely no idea what to do. He turned back to his friends, lifting a tiny paw. Sirius looked at James in confusion.

"Try whatever Madam Pomfrey did," James said quickly.

Peter transformed back and the three of them commenced, doing their best to see what they could do. Well, that didn't work and they just killed about ten minutes trying to point their wands at the tree and shout various spells to the point where Sirius just started mixing up words or even making up his own.

"This isn't working," James said impatiently and shrugged the cloak off. "Can't we just try to dodge these stupid branches?"

"I'll try," Peter said immediately. "I am the smallest and maybe I can get around the easiest and see if anything's there."

Peter did not wait for an answer. He slipped away in his new Animagus form and hurried forward. At first, Peter was being cautious, taking precise steps and dodging the branches. Only when a branch squashed his tail, did he give up on trying to be exact and he just sprinted forward and went for it, nose first.

"Your left, your left!" Sirius shouted, hopping on the heels of his feet.

Peter moved to his right and just avoided a branch coming down on him from his left. James nearly passed out but he forced himself to keep watching. Sirius was helping Peter by guiding him around and warning him before it could hurt him.

"You're almost there!" Sirius said and took a step forward. "You are right there!"

Peter squeaked when he misplaced his paw and a low swinging branch knocked Peter right to the base of the tree. It hurt quite a deal for he landed on something protruding from the trunk. Wheezing and laying there, panting heavily, Peter managed to lift his tiny head for a fraction of a second.

"Wormtail!" Sirius shouted but his voice died somewhere in his throat.

He was not the only one to notice something very odd about the entire ordeal. James gasped, too. The silence was a bit stretched but Peter focusing on keeping from passing out to really notice much.

"The tree," James breathed and took a step forward. "It stopped moving."

Not a single leaf fluttered.

"What is this?" Sirius asked, knitting his eyebrows together in evident confusion. "What made it stop?"

James transformed and took another step forward, bowing his head slightly in case the branches did decide to come back to life. His antlers glimmered in the moonlight but the tree remained as still as ever.

 _I hit the knot on the base of the trunk, Prongs. That is what stopped it,_ Peter said and rose on his hind paws. _This is the way to get in—this knot._

 _Are you serious?_ James asked, raising his head to sniff the air. _This is brilliant, let me see._

James came galloping up and skidded to a halt right before Peter. The rat scurried up the flank of James and rested on the stag's shoulder. James bent down and sniffed the oddly shaped part of the trunk and pawed the grass, suddenly excited.

 _This is it! This can be our way in! I was so afraid we would have to walk to Hogsmeade,_ James said and swung his head low.

 _What would have been so bad about that_? Sirius asked, bounding up as a great black dog. His tail was wagging vigorously.

 _Anyone could see us from the path to Hogsmeade,_ James pointed out and sniffed the entrance. _Do you think I'll be able to fit through that?_

 _Not at all, Prongs. Transform back. I'll stay in mine in case something happens,_ Sirius said and barked happily. _I'm a dog!_

 _You as my protector? Ja_ mes snorted but transformed back into his human form, holding Peter in the palm of his hand.

 _Oi!_ Sirius whined indignantly _. I would give my life for you, you know that._

"Good that, Padfoot," James said and patted Sirius on the head. "Dogs are a man's best friend, right?"

Sirius barked happily and licked James's hand. And the three of them headed down the winding stone trail that Remus had to take every full moon. Sirius went first, sniffing the perimeter. He trotted happily with his ears pricked (despite the fact that they were already pricked) and tail held high.

They seemed to have underestimated the time it took to get from the Whomping Willow to the Shrieking Shack because by the time they finally could see the end of the tunnel, it was close to ten minutes before the full moon would fully shine.

"Almost there," James said and narrowed his eyes against the darkness. "We are almost there, Padfoot. Hang in there."

The poor black dog had crashed into a jutting piece of rock and bruised his shoulder. Sirius spent three minutes straight just growling and snarling and barking at that piece of rock as if it understood his anger.

Peter squeaked and hopped from James's hand to Sirius's rump. The black dog startled for a moment before recomposing himself and bounding forward. The hole to the Shrieking Shack was large enough for Sirius and Peter to get through but it was still not large enough for a fully grown stag to slip through so James was forced to wait with the transformation until he was heaving himself through the floor of the Shrieking Shack.

It was strange to the three of them for they have never been inside the Shrieking Shack. Well, they have but their opportunity to really explore the place was a bit delayed due to the fact that a fully grown werewolf was after them for trespassing.

"This is it, eh?" James said and scratched the dog's flank. "I vaguely remember this, do you?"

"Prongs?"

That voice belonged to someone different. There was a person (covered by the shadows) at the top of the stairs, looking down at them. James swallowed uneasily and rose to his feet to see his best mate watching them from above.

Remus looked rougher than usual, especially tonight. His eyes were strained and weary yet filled with worry and concern. The little moonlight that reached in the place illuminated every tired angle of Remus's face and James was sure the poor student was going to get gray hairs early from the amount of stress that was put on his shoulders.

In other words, he really did look like the Greek titan, Atlas with the weight of the sky upon his shoulders. Another fact about Remus was the fact...that he did not look all too entirely pleased.

"What are you doing here?" Remus asked, frowning deeply.

"We are coming to help you," James said hastily and motioned to the dog and rat. "We followed you in here when Madam Pomfrey left."

"You shouldn't be here," Remus said instantly, not even questioning James's motive. That was a rarity in itself. "Padfoot, you need to get out now before I transform. You know that dogs—"

But before James could reply properly, Remus doubled over with a sharp inhalation and clutched his middle as if he was suddenly stabbed there by some kind of invisible force. James's expression instantly went from worry to extremely worried. The transformation, James could tell, was beginning.

He wanted to help Remus get back to the room but he also did not want to get too close. Sirius barked twice and suddenly transformed back into himself. James blinked in surprise but his mouth just did not seem to work. Words never came out.

"Transform, Prongs; we need antlers more than teeth," Sirius said hastily and stormed up the stairs.

James had no idea what his best mate was doing but he listened to Sirius for the sake of the other's life. As soon as two legs became four, he rushed towards the base of the stairs to see what Sirius was doing. He was pushing Remus back in a way that delivered as little pain as possible. Remus was thrashing about in Sirius's arms but they were slowly moving backward.

It would have been an absolute disaster if they were to transform all there. The werewolf would have an easy way of getting out through that hole (even if it would be a tight squeeze to get through). James galloped up the stairs but it had proven to be ridiculously difficult. He was struggling already on his fifth stair; his long legs just did not want to make it up those steps.

Peter rushed past him, through and underneath James's immense body, and transformed back into human form. He motioned for James to hurry up but the bespectacled student was confused on what Peter was trying to do. Then, when he saw Peter's hand on the door, he knew Peter wanted to lock them in the room. James gathered his long legs underneath him and hurtled up the staircase. He cleared the jump over a wardrobe and came face to face with Sirius and Remus.

Bleating angrily, James threw the rest of his weight upward and into the room where Sirius was still holding Remus back. It was frightening to see Remus already halfway into his werewolf form but Peter was closing the door, or attempting to. The door was stuck on a large wooden wardrobe.

"One of you has to help," Peter gasped, trying with all his might to push it out of the way.

Sirius looked torn between keeping Remus at bay and helping Peter; in the end, he let go of Remus's arms and sprinted across the room to Peter's aid. The two of them were still struggling to move it but James came over to push it with his antlers. Almost immediately after he turned his back on Remus, something scored its claws against James's hindquarters.

The pain was instantaneous and it made the large stag's hind legs buckle. Bellowing with rage, the stag started bucking. Several times, James heard and felt his hooves connect with body and the whine from the werewolf.

"Got it!" Peter shouted.

The wardrobe slid all the way down the stairs landed in a heap at the bottom of them. Both of them instantly slammed the door shut and locked it for good measure before hastily transforming. James was using his antlers to keep the werewolf at bay, which was proven effective until the werewolf caught scent of something else. The aggression was suddenly not directed at James.

The stag looked confused but then it pricked its ears when the werewolf stared past him and at Sirius.

Sirius did not move or show any signs of wanting to move. Instead, the black dog just sat on its rump and waited patiently for the werewolf to do something. James took a step back, still brandishing his antlers, but continued to move back. The werewolf had absolutely no interest in James anymore; its new target was Sirius.

 _What's going on?_ Peter asked, leaping into safety. _Why is he going after Padfoot?_

 _What did Moony say about dogs?_ James asked carefully.

 _He never finished,_ Peter said fretfully and turned to Sirius. _Padfoot, watch yourself!_

 _I know what Moony was saying,_ Sirius said suddenly, turning to his friends with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. _I know what Moony was going to say._

The dog's whiskers twitched but he turned back to the werewolf and looked at it straight in the eye. It was a universal symbol of challenging to the alpha in the world of canines. And that was when James and Peter understood.

 _One of us wants dominance. Moony's trying to establish it,_ Sirius said at last.

 _Forget it_ , James said and stamped the ground. _Forget it, Padfoot._ _Give into submission. We aren't getting injured and we aren't injuring anyone tonight._

 _No,_ Sirius said and rose to his paws. _If I give Moony dominance, he will hurt us all._

 _You are not fighting, Remus,_ James said seriously, even using Remus's real name. _Give in, Sirius._

 _No,_ Sirius insisted and bared his teeth. _I want the dominance._

James made to move forward but, hanging from the high arced bed post, was a net. He was instantly stopped in his tracks when his antlers caught the net and held him fast. James panicked and started thrashing.

 _Sirius, stop!_ Peter shouted and raced over to help James. _You aren't going to win!_

 _No, Wormtail,_ Sirius said with a shake of his great head. _Trust me, it will be better if I was in control of Moony._

 _You're mad!_ James bellowed, still thrashing around. His legs were getting caught the net below them.

 _No, I am just highly intelligent._

Sirius growled low in warning but the werewolf continued to advance. The stag, whose antlers were still caught, was thrashing around the net, making it worse. The great black dog raised his hackles and bared his teeth, laying his ears back in a sign of warning.

 _Don't hurt him!_ Peter cried. _Be careful but don't hurt him._

The werewolf advanced forward but the dog swelled. The stag bellowed but only tangled himself in the net even more. That was when the werewolf and the dog ran at one another at full speed. The crash echoed loudly and could be heard from a mile away. Sirius reared on his hind legs to match the height of the other but the werewolf was still taller and stronger.

It shoved Sirius off and roared again in challenge. Sirius whined but continued to fight until he was pinned down mercilessly by the werewolf. The two struggled on the ground for a firm grip; the werewolf bent its head low with its jaws open for a bite but Sirius lunged forward and locked his jaws on the lower part of the mouth. The werewolf, out of instinct, bit down, leaving the werewolf to thrash in its jaws. But the two of them were bleeding from the mouth quite excessively until they both flung away from each other.

The werewolf regrouped, positioning itself again, recalculating its next moves. Sirius twisted forward but the werewolf caught him with its claws and dug them deep into Sirius's flank, making him flip over.

Sirius picked himself up and pushed back against the werewolf while James was bellowing the entire time. The werewolf was thrown off and looked at its bleeding wound.

The two circled around and growled and roared in a sign of dominance. Their hackles were raised and their fur was bristled like mad. Sirius rushed at the werewolf and went for the throat. The werewolf grabbed Sirius's leg in its jaw and threw him off. Sirius came back limping. Sirius whined once, looking at his wound until he came back and locked his jaws around the werewolf's neck. The sound of utter screaming echoed throughout the Shrieking Shack that even made James pause in fright. The fight for dominance was predictable but it was the outcome that surprised them all.

The dog snarled so loudly, it sounded like it was roaring.

 _Yes, that is all,_ Sirius snarled.

The werewolf, who was laying on the floor at Sirius's paws, growled low in its throat. But it did not try to challenge him again. The great dog turned back to James and Peter, who were freeing themselves and shrugging the last part of the net from around them.

But now that the fight was finished and the adrenaline was slowing down, Sirius could feel the physical wounds the werewolf had left. The stag and rat raked their gazes over the two wrecked bodies and held their breaths as they scrutinized them.

The werewolf had the worst of it; its fur was torn on its left shoulder right to the point where its skin was worn away, too. Red flesh burned brightly against the darkness. The beast's muzzle was torn to pieces; loose skin held in by barely threads of flesh. The werewolf jerked unevenly and howled when those loose pieces of skin ripped off. Its ear was nearly shredded, split and nicked in deep "v's" by the work of Sirius's lethal claws and teeth. But the worst bit of the werewolf wás itz entire snout. Its mouth was shredded and cut open. Its tongue was bleeding freely and teeth marks littered the inside of its mouth and lips. Sirius whined pitifully as it exmained the damage it bad done to the werewolf.

But the werewolf had also left visible injuries on the dog. The werewolf had at one point grabbed Sirius's paw in its jaws and twisted and rolled like crocodile. The resounding echo shot off when Sirius's bone snapped. The dog wised up and began rolling with the werewolf, able to lock his jaws around the mouth. Unfortunately, Sirius had suffered the consequences of doing so. The great dog's mouth close around the upped mouth of the werewolf and locked hard. But at a price, the werewolf's bottom jaw closed tightly and bit through Sirius's chin.

When it occurred, the werewolf reeled back, realizing that it nearly lost its tongue pulling that stunt. Both were critically injured.

 _Don't worry, Prongs. I won't miss Quidditch tryouts._

With that, Sirius collapsed.

* * *

"Hey, Moony?"

Remus groaned but found that he could not move. Panicking, his eyes flew open (big mistake). Everything in his body just screamed at him, chiding him for agitating his wounds. Remus did not even get a good look at the damage he inflicted upon himself but then he remembered something—his head snapped upward—

"Prongs! Wormtail!"

Remus gasped and struggled to a sitting position, something a little more dignifying than laying pathetically on his back. James instantly reacted and held Remus by the shoulder, quieting him down in fear of further inflicting pain

"You came!" Remus gasped again, finding breathing much too arduous.

"Like we promised," James whispered softly, pushing Remus's hair out of his eyes. "How are you feeling? Give me a number one through ten—ten being the worst."

"Seven," Remus croaked weakly. "What happened? I vaguely remember seeing you at the stairs. I can't remember much of anything after that."

"We got you back in the room and all was good and safe," James explained vaguely, deciding to leave out the details for now.

"And Padfoot?" Remus rasped, blinking slowly. "If he was here, there might have been a chance weird we tried establishing dominance."

"You lost, Moony," a voice whispered.

Remus jumped slightly and sat up without acknowledging any pain. What he saw before him fueled all of his self-hatred and boiled inside him until he felt like he could shrivel up and hide forever. Even though speaking was one of the most painful things to do, he still spoke:

"What have I done to you?" asked he. "I am a monster!"

Remus closed his eyes, willing for the sight and image of his best mate on the floor, bleeding freely and panting heavily. His eyes were glazed over and his chest barely moved. How Sirius had the strength to transform back to his human form was beyond Remus.

"I went to get," James said, biting his lip. "Wormtail is coming up with a very elaborate lie to keep us from having to tell her what we really are."

Sirius's chest was nearly laid open, all done by the works of an aggressive, dominant werewolf—monster. He, Remus John Lupin, did this to his friend. He felt sick. But even worse, he felt inhumane.

"I am damned—just a monster," Remus said, shaking his head. "I am nothing but a horrible thing!"

* * *

 **Raise your hand if you have a dog! What breed?**


	15. XV: Hurting You Hurts Me

**All rights remain.**

"Don't say that, Moony," James said through gritted teeth. "You are not a monster. You just lost control. It was our first night transforming. We knew it was going to be tricky, didn't we? We knew what we were getting ourselves into."

Remus cracked his eyes open and looked James, watching as his bespectacled friend pursed his lips in a manner that made him look like he was holding back on something he wanted to say. Remus already saw the worst so he wanted to know what was on James's mind. He opened his mouth to get the words out but his voice simply would not work for him and he was left wheezing hacking coughs.

"Stay still," James said, sounding very worried. "I might have gotten your ribs or something."

"I'd deserve it," Remus muttered so softly under his breath, James almost missed it.

"Come again?" James asked sternly, a glare now forming on his usually infallible face.

"Nothing," the werewolf said quickly, trying to cover up for his mistake.

The three of them sat in silence and as much as Remus hated it, he deserved it. The pain hurtling through him, head down, and charging kept him from passing out. It kept him conscious, feeling the emotion exhaustion he was putting himself through. The steady hand on his wrist barely kept his quisling thoughts at bay but it did help him feel a little less lonely. But then again, he probably deserved to be alone.

"Stop," Sirius said suddenly, his voice sounding much stronger at that point. "Stop whatever thoughts are going through that thick skull of yours, Moony."

"I dunno what you're talking about," Remus said under his breath but he focused his attention on the other's voice.

Sirius did not respond at first; the student's eyes were shut as if he was asleep but Remus was not fooled, Sirius was not just tired, he was injured beyond belief. Remus felt guilt crawl up his throat and tighten its grip around his airways. But Sirius opened his eyes quickly and sat upright, ignoring both of his friends' protests and shifted to look at Remus, suddenly looking like the old Sirius Black.

"You're our best mate," Sirius said albeit his voice was hoarse and raspy; it was a sound that made Remus wince. "You cannot go blaming yourself for what's happened. It's shit, I know, but we're adjusting, are we not?"

"We're stupid," Remus said at once, biting back a groan of agony. "This was never a good idea and I should have never let this happen. If I was stricter, none of this would have happened."

"But what would have stopped you from hurting yourself?" Sirius barked, his voice finding strength again.

"Knowing it was me would have offered me much more comfort," Remus retorted bluntly. "I can handle the pain; this kind is foreign to you and you may have forgotten but whatever scars I gave you tonight will forever stay with you."

There was a unpleasant pause as if his friends were really considering it but in reality, they were thinking of better ways to sort out their dominance issues before next full moon.

"That's not it," James insisted and pushed back Remus's hair from his eyes. "That's not what we care about."

"Well you should," Remus snapped then closed his eyes as if he regretted his harsh words. "If this gets too out of hand I am going to have to forbid you from going with me to these full moons."

"You can't treat us like we're ten, Moony," James said with the tiniest hint of a quip.

"And from the looks of it, so far it's not starting off well. Do you understand what kind of territory you are entering as animals? This is the one place the werewolf is used to so of course it's going to be protective of its territory," Remus said through gritted teeth. His agitated movements were really only agitating his wounds. The more he talked, the more he felt like he wanted to rip out his lungs.

James and Sirius exchanged looks with knowing looks; it bothered Remus to the extreme when they would look at each other like that. It seriously looked like they were telepathically speaking and it made him the tiniest bit self-conscious. He was about to retort but the two of them broke eye contact.

"Then we establish dominance," Sirius said and looked at him dead in the eye. "I just have to practice a bit more, that's all. I'm not quite used to the body of a dog yet but once I am, I'll be able to defend properly."

Sirius was wise to not use the word 'fight' but he still could not help but feel a bit indignant about Remus's previous comment. He was not weak and could certainly go by with a few new scars; after all he had come from the Black family, a family who "accidentally" hit him with random objects. His silver tongue was ready to defend himself but his heart was telling him not to. But Remus was not stupid; he caught onto Sirius's thought s and closed his eyes while taking a deep breath.

"I'm not saying you're not strong," Remus explained slowly. "You are one of the strongest friends I have but showing up with scars is not the most normal thing. Have you seen the way people look at me when they walk by my scarred and marked face?"

"I see girls go weak at the sight of your faces and blokes stare at you in admiration, thinking how tough and strong you are," James said, answering instead of Sirius. "That is what I see when walking down the halls with you."

"Are you sure they aren't just looking at you?" Remus asked bitterly, fingers ghosting over the scars on his face. "It would be an easy and honest mistake."

"Don't be dense," Sirius chided. "You mean plenty to us all and we are all very secretly jealous at your gift to remain completely intact despite your condition. We all admire that about you," Sirius said, sounding uncharacteristically stern. He fixed Remus with a stern glare and Remus was squirming uncomfortably at the number of compliments he was receiving.

"That doesn't change how I completely lose it every full moon," Remus said, deciding there was still time for him to argue his point.

"But that just _is_ the point! You can't control what happens when you are a werewolf!" James insisted, taking Remus's point and turning it back at him.

"Imagine if you had a human mind when a werewolf; you'd be the sweetest dog anyone could ask for!" Sirius said and waved his hand in some sort of emphasizing gesture. "You'd be a much better canine than me!"

Remus had to chuckle but it was a strained and reluctant one. He did appreciate their words and he allowed them to sink into his core yet it still felt as if it was not enough. Remus bit his lip and tried to keep the hate from pouring past his lips. Even his friends' words were just not enough for him. He was beginning to detest himself all over again.

James sensed Remus's spiral but he could not do anything but pat the student on the shoulder and rub his shoulder. He knew whatever he would say would just not be good enough for Remus right now so he opted for silent comfort. He could feel the tension in the other's body so he focused on trying to get the other relaxed.

* * *

"Hang on, Pettigrew. Now tell me again but slower—who was attacked?"

Madam Pomfrey had her hands held up to interrupt Peter's well-thought story. He had come galloping into her Hospital Wing at 4:00 in the morning and she was barely stirring. Needless to say, Peter launched right into his story before he would forget some of the most important parts of it. She woke up a bit startled and even a bit confused (seeing as to really was only 4:00 and she was woken up by her doors flinging wide open).

"It's Sirius!" Peter gasped (he was actually just really out of breath but gasping like he was in some kind of fit of hysteria seemed much more believable). "He's been attacked by something! He was outside this morning trying to find something near Hagrid's by those weird stones but he was attacked by something bad!"

"How is that possible? Hogwarts has security—"

"To keep out people, not animals!" Peter protested and motioned for her to follow him. "You have to come and see him!"

She blinked but by the time she opened her eyes again, Peter was gone. Now the race had begun. Peter was sprinting as fast as he could all the way back to the Whomping Willow. His heart was screaming and his lungs were set ablaze upon pyres as he ran but he pushed it away until he thought he was going to barf. He did not bother to look back and when he could close enough to the Whomping Willow, he seized the branch (he had previously set there for himself) and ran valiantly towards the swinging branches. He only had to get close enough to freeze the tree.

"Yes!"

He got it on his first try and he sprinted down the winding path. On his way in, he could see James and Sirius walking beside each other, one supporting the other. Sirius was leaning heavily against James and his face was contorted with evident pain. Peter was worryingly casting glances over his shoulder but he was sure he got a splendid head start on her.

"Good going, Wormtail!" James gasped and smiled through his weariness.

The two of them, combining their strength, were able to lift Sirius with ease and nearly sprint away towards Hogsmeade. The run was a bit bumpy and rocky, making Sirius lurch unevenly but the boy had lost so much blood he did not say anything. Lethargic, wounded, and probably dying, Sirius did not protest when they just lay him on a patch of grass near the Hogsmeade sign.

Sirius cracked an eye open and his lips quirked into a little smile before it vanished with a stifled gasp of pain. His face paled considerably (which was a bit unbelievable considering his face was already scarily colorless) and his dulled lips fell back into a soft frown and Sirius slipped out of consciousness.

"Quick!" James said, roughly nudging Peter unnecessarily hard in the ribs. "Quick before Madam Pomfrey comes, take this and hide it!"

James shoved his Invisibility Cloak, his prized possession, into Peter's hands and patted him on the elbow. The bespectacled boy felt a little nervous giving Peter his cloak, seeing as the boy was an absolute horrible liar, but he trusted his friends (which would probably be his downfall).

"Why?" Peter asked, frowning, trying to give it back to James. "I said I'd stick with Moony while you sit with Padfoot.

" you need a way to get in, don't you, without people seeing you," James said as of it was the most obvious thing in the world. "No one knows how to get past it. Let's hope that doesn't change."

Peter, understanding, threw the cloak over him and vanished to the naked eye. James gave Peter the thumbs-up in the general area where he last saw his friend and whispered: "good luck!" just in case Peter was feeling nervous going back during daylight and unable to transform.

Peter was, in fact, feeling a bit nervous. He whispered back his thanks and appreciation but he set forward at a rapid pace. He passed right by Madam Pomfrey on his way back and nearly walked right into her if it were not for the fact she scrambled off the path when a particularly large puddle soaked her shoe. Peter distinctly heard her mutter a drying charm but he was long gone.

"I'm coming back, Moony," Peter said to himself.

* * *

Remus was just laying there like the pathetic heap he was. His breathing was labored and exhausted-sounding. The image of Sirius lying and near to bleeding to death, Remus had definitely felt better. All the time alone made him realize how stupid he was to agreeing with this. Animagi or not, he was not going to risk the lives of his friends for himself. He was not raised to be a selfish person.

"I'm sorry," Remus said to no one. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Padfoot. I only did what any monster would do. But I swear it was involuntary. I would never lay a finger on you if I still was in my right mind. Unfortunately, it feels as if I am losing my right mind when I am still human."

And though no one heard him, he still felt like a little piece of the heavy weight on his chest alleviated or shifted. Perhaps it was better no one heard him. Remus was on the brink of giving up and falling asleep, a tiny piece of him hoping he would wake up much later if not never. But something in his mind kept him in consciousness.

He thought he could hear footsteps. He really should have checked or something but he was lying in his own puddle of blood and was no mood to get up. Remus cast out his enhanced hearing and listened closely to the quick breaths of the person coming up the stairs. Not moments later, Peter came rushing towards him. Remus swore he could see Peter's hands drenched in blood but his eyes just did not want to adjust.

"Someone's coming up but it might take a while," Peter said in nearly a single breath. "Madam Pomfrey sent Professor Dumbledore to get the other two and she is coming up here for you."

"Okay," Remus said, his voice barely a hushed whisper.

"I'm sorry this happened to you!" Peter blurted out and winced at his own words. "I meant to say I am sorry the first time trying this new thing turned out to be like this."

"Me, too."

"But we knew this was going to be tricky," Peter said, a little rushed. "Once we get the hang of it, it'll be much easier to handle."

"To handle a monster?" Remus rasped, not even opening his eyes to look at Peter.

"No, to handle someone who can't help their condition. What's going on, Moony? You were doing so well—you know, believing you weren't a monster."

"And then the animal just overtook everything and attacked one of our best mates," Remus wheezed, hacking up his lungs.

"All right, all right," Peter said, placing the pads of his fingertips on Remus's shoulder. "Stop talking, I won't argue."

Remus chuckled lightly and shifted his position as much as he could without aggravating his drying wounds. Peter sensed the movement and rested the palm of his hand on Remus, trying to subtly keep him in place.

"She'll be here any minute, Moony. I promise," Peter said and bit his lip. "Don't worry too much."

"I'm not worried."

"What?"

"I trust you to handle this."

With that, Remus slipped into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

"How did this happen, Mr. Potter?"

James was bowing, almost literally, under the stern and concerned gaze of Professor Dumbledore (the Headmaster might he add). He was sunk, utterly and completely sunk. Peter knew the story from front to back and back to front. And what did James know; nothing except how not to win Lily Evan's affection.

"He was attacked, Headmaster. He likes walking around when he's up early and something must have come from outside and attacked him," James said, feeling the lie burn on his tongue.

"Do you think it came from the Forbidden Forest?" Professor Dumbledore asked, frowning slightly as he finished bandaging the boy. "If it did, that would be a different story, Mr. Potter."

"No, sir," James decided quickly but believably. "This was not an attack from the Forbidden Forest. Sirius never went anywhere near there and—"

He paused and broke off, swallowing just a bit nervously.

"—and even if they strayed past the borderline, why would they attack him? He's done nothing to provoke an arbitrary attack, Headmaster."

"Then what do you propose?" Professor Dumbledore asked, levitating Sirius onto a stretcher he conjured in midair.

"Sir? What do I propose? I don't know. It must have been from a wild animal—"

"You're lying, my dear boy, but I shall speak about it later," Professor Dumbledore said ever so calmly, perhaps even noticing James's shocked expression.

He stood awkwardly as the Headmaster started walking way with his friend and had no idea if he should follow. But when Professor Dumbledore looked the tiniest bit over his shoulder and nodded, James rushed behind and stuck close to his wounded friend.

The walk there was exhausting but not physically. His mind was moving like a forest fire, thoughts being left behind or thrown right before his eyes. James pursed his lips to keep himself from saying something he knew he would later regret.

Professor Dumbledore sensed his student's worries and cast him a sympathetic glance over his shoulder when he turned into the castle. The Hospital Wing seemed like a place that was too far away for James's liking and he did not really understand why Professor Dumbledore did not try to heal him at the spot. The boy didn't even know if Madam Pomfrey was going to be back from helping Remus but he kept it to himself.

"Sir," James blurted out, unable to help himself. "Sir, Pa—Sirius is bleeding through the bandages. Once we're there, can we change them?"

"Certainly but we must get there first," Professor Dumbledore said smoothly. "You must trust my words, Mr. Potter, if you want your friend to recover."

"You know, don't you, sir?" James said, biting his lower lip. "You know his wounds can't be healed all the way."

"That I do know," the Headmaster said with a nod. "But again, Mr. Potter, we will speak about it later. Your friend needs help."

"I won't argue with that," James said under his breath.

Professor Dumbledore lay Sirius down on the Hospital Wing bed and changed his bandages after cleaning the student's wounds but it was the only thing he did. James felt a little annoyed no one was helping Sirius but he then reminded himself Madam Pomfrey was tending to his other friend's wounds and she couldn't be in two places at once.

"I know you are concerned for your friend," Professor Dumbledore said and shook his head. "I wish you would tell me the truth but I respect students' privacy and will not pry. Let us hope this piece of information will not hinder your friend's chance of recovering quickly."

"Sir?"

"Professor!"

Madam Pomfrey came rushing in the Hospital Wing with Remus crutching along beside her. He was leaning heavily against the two wooden post-like things under his arms and his head was bent over, his hair hiding his face.

"You're here," Professor Dumbledore said pleasantly and smiled. "How wonderful, I was just going to take this boy to St. Mungos—"

"No!" James suddenly shouted, sounding much too loud for his own liking. "I mean please don't. Sirius's parents will go berserk on him if they found out what happened."

"Please, Professor, can't you cure him the best you can here?" Peter asked.

"I only have enough potions to heal and energize one person," Madam Pomfrey said, looking troubled.

"What if we brewed another?" Peter asked hopefully only to have them fall.

"It will take too long to get the ingredients and ripen," Madam Pomfrey said with a shake of her head.

"What if we tried duplicating it?" James suggested.

"Unfortunately, it doesn't work either. If replicated, the sequel will be useless."

James snorted dismally, looking annoyed at whoever the dumb wizard or witch created such a complicated potion to get. Madam Pomfrey was looking at Sirius with more concern, frowning as she formulated ideas into her head.

"He can have mine," Remus said, suddenly breaking the silence.

"Sorry?" James said.

"He can have mine."

"You need it—"

"—less than he does," Remus interrupted and took a staggering step forward, pursing his lips with determination. "My body can withstand these injuries much more so than Sirius's body can. It would only be fitting if he received it."

"Mr. Black would want to thank you in person," Professor Dumbledore said.

"He doesn't like to be called Mr. Black, Professor, because it reminds him of his father," Peter said and winced at his own voice.

"I know but to me, he will always be a member of the Black family—just in a better light."

* * *

Sirius was not a fan of pain or exhaustion. No one really is. When the combination of exhaustion and pain hit him, he felt like million galleons but not really. He woke up cussing out his pain like a madman. It shocked James and Peter but was disapproved by Remus.

"It helps me cope with the pain!"

"Drink this," Madam Pomfrey said and pushed a glass of blue liquid into his hands.

"What is this?" he asked curiously, raising it to eye level.

"It's an energy-enhancer potion," Madam Pomfrey barked, pointing at it. "Now drink up before you pass out or something. This will make you feel better."

"Will it make me better?" Sirius quipped.

"I already gave you potions to help with the healing process. Now may I ask what attacked you? I couldn't heal these wounds with my magic."

"I was messing around and magicked a dog into something hybrid. I learned how to do it from the Restricted Section of the library but the spell was temporary—"

"You were performing illicit magic on school grounds?" Madam Pomfrey concluded, swelling up angrily.

"No!" Sirius said then stopped himself. "Wait, since when do I care about breaking the rules? Yeah, I did. But I made sure to do it safely."

"Yeah? And look where it ended up!" Madam Pomfrey said, gesturing to him. "I hope you have learned your lesson, Mr. Black. "

"I would rather you call me 'Dirt' than 'Mr. Black'. I detest being called that," Sirius said with a little scowl.

"All right! Never you mind, drink that and don't let it go to waste!" Madam Pomfrey demanded none too gently.

Sirius gave her a skeptical look but he pressed the liquid to his lips and closed his eyes tight before drinking it all in one. The face he made would have probably been more amusing if they were not already in a tight spot. And if the circumstances weren't so serious, James and Peter would have definitely been laughing.

"This is disgusting!" Sirius declared and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "I dunno if this wants to stay down."

It was true, Sirius did look a little sick but the poor boy earned a tight glare from Madam Pomfrey and shrunk under her ferocious glower.

"I have classes today," James said and looked Sirius. "I know the routine, mate. I'll go to all of our classes and take extremely detailed notes to share with you and Moony later."

"Sounds good," Sirius said with a little smile.

"Okay? Well, we'll see you at lunch maybe," Peter said and stood up. "We have to get washed up. We look awful."

"Right—"

"Wait, what time are you eating lunch today?" Sirius asked.

"Probably 12:30. We have a single class of Herbology today."

"Excellent."

* * *

Remus was lying in a separate part of the Hospital Wing, listening in on his friends and ultimately glad no one mentioned him. It was hard enough to see his friend wrapped in bandages and bleeding from severe wounds made by his own claws—the last thing he wanted was sympathy from his friends when it was he who was the real antagonist.

Madam Pomfrey drew the curtains around his bed and pulled out the room divider to give Remus maximum privacy. He felt sickened with himself even if his friends were telling him it was not his fault. It was not true and Remus knew that. He knew his friends were only saying that to spare his feelings.

He didn't deserve it. Remus did not deserve his friends and yet, here they were. They went through something extraordinary thing to help him during the full moons.

The room tilted.

He would feel even worse if he portrayed himself as someone who didn't want their friends' help because he certainly did. He was torn between the safety of his friends and...the rest of the idea of the whole ordeal. The idea of having company seemed less lonely to him, more appealing.

Remus shook his head, feeling guilty.

He had to go see Sirius. Upon deciding, Remus rose to his feet, wincing as he did so, seized the crutches, and hobbled over to Sirius's bed on the other side of the Hospital Wing. Madam Pomfrey, gone for a little while, left the boys securely tucked away in the Hospital Wing.

"What are you doing, Moony?" Sirius asked, propping himself up on his elbows.

"I'm coming over there to see you," Remus bit back a bit sarcastically. "Why else would I be hobbling in your direction?"

"Touché."

Remus chuckled despite of himself and plopped down at the foot of Sirius's bed. The pair of them just listened to the silence, not really saying anything, until one of them broke the silence.

"How are you feeling?"

Remus jumped a little in surprise but he shrugged and pulled on an impassive expression. "I'm doing pretty well, how are you holding up?"

"I'm fine," Sirius said in a firm voice. "Those potions she gave me helped me loads."

Remus did not reply right away, wishing he was as eloquent as people told him.

"Those were yours, weren't they? Why on earth would she give me your potions when you needed them more than me?" Sirius sai, his voice rising in volume and pitch.

"Don't worry yourself, Padfoot, or you are going to give yourself another headache. We all agreed upon the fact my body is more used to this kind of treatment than yours and I could hold off for one month."

"And they all went through with this?" Sirius asked in pure and earnest astonishment. "How could they?"

"It was logical, Padfoot. It was nothing more than that," Remus said, trying not to sound weary.

There was a slight pause of silence between the two boys but the silence was interrupted by a loud and frantic pounding on the door. Sirius winced and the noise and Remus scowled but it vanished immediately after seeing who had trekked in.

"Evans? Back already?" Sirius quipped but his voice was wheezy and just not into the joke.

"I came to see Remus," Lily said more specifically and her eyes landed on him. "I wanted to see how he was feeling."

"What am I? Dead liver?" Sirius said, sounding offended. "I got hurt, too, you know?"

"I will give you sympathy if you will lower that ego of yours, Black," Lily said then turned back to Remus. "Should you be out of bed? How is your leg? What did she say was wrong?"

"A bit of everything," Remus replied earnestly. "But it won't be bad."

"Did you take your potions?" Lily asked, sounding very much like his mother.

"I am recovering well enough," Remus said honestly and shrugged. "I was just seeing how Padfoot was doing—"

"Padfoot? Who is Padfoot? A dog?"

Sirius and Remus exchanged the quickest of glances between each other before clearing their throats and shaking their heads.

"It's just a stupid nickname," Remus lied very quickly and very smoothly. "I call him Padfoot because he steps on my feet all the time, most of the time it's on purpose."

"You lot are so confusing," Lily said, throwing her hands up in the air as a gesture of surrender.

"We call James 'Prongs' because he always butts heads with other people; it's quite amusing to watch, you know, Evans," Sirius said with a laugh, making the lie even more believable.

Remus looked at Lily's confused expression, feeling guilty inside for lying to one of his best mates. However, it was not his secret to share and he respected their wishes and privacy just as they respected his.

"Fine, whatever," Lily said then swung around by Remus. "May I please escort you back to your bed? I really don't like the idea of having you up and walking around this soon."

"Wait, she knows about your condition?" Sirius asked then snapped his fingers. "That's right, she does. I actually momentarily forgot about that and I was wondering why you were not lying or making up some random story like you did to us."

"Not to bring back all those lovely memories but now is not really the time to be discussing the flaws of my past regarding our friendship, Padfoot," Remus said all very quickly. "But I honestly think we can leave that out for the time being."

"For you, Moony, anything!" Sirius quoted, quirking his lips.

"Not that again!" Remus groaned.

"I think I'm feeling better already!"

* * *

 **That was a really lame ending. I am sorry for the wait, I just love school so much I can't bear to be away from it for a minute. It comes with the pride of pursuing anesthesiology. Thank you for reading!**

 **Question of the day: What is your favorite word?**  
 **I am going to do my best to add your favorite word into the next chapter.**  
 **Go nuts with the words!**


	16. XVI: A Day without a Name

For the first time in the three days the part of four were staying at Remus's house, The Marauders sat together and ate.

A long silence stretched before them as the only sound in that empty sining room was the clatter of forks against their plates. As the silence stretched, the boys became more figety until Remus broke it.

"Are we going to act like awkward people? We're all friends here."

"You're making a valiant effort to be strong," Sirius said and nearly dropped his fork, "that's one of the many things I admire about you."

Remus smiled at his friend's kind words.

"It is not all bad. At least my mother is somewhere were she wants to be."

"Life is unfair," Peter said and frowned deeply. "Not one life is perfect."

"Life has its own idea of unfair," Remus said, shrugging and looking through the glass windows that stretched from the wooden floor to the ceiling.

He cleared away their plates and sat back down at the glass table, waiting for them to say something.

"Want to go down by the water?" James asked as if he read Remus's mind.

The other three quickly nodded as they grabbed their shoes and jackets. Jogging lightly down the hill, they stopped as they reached the sandy shore.

They kicked off their shoes and buried their feet in the warm sand, loving how it was their personal feet warmers. They tore off their jackets and loosened their buttoned down shirts.

But soon enough, The Marauders found themselves rolling up their pants and wading in the cool water, letting the ocean water lap at their shins.

Remus stood in the water for the longest time, letting his problems wash away with the waves as they danced merrily against the sand, taking small rocks and loose shells with it as the waves pulled back.

"So, what's up?" Remus asked trying to break the awkward silence that found them again. "Are you glad we're going back to Hogwarts?"

"Yeah," James said and tried to smile. "But I like spending Christmas vacation here—you have a nice house."

"You really do," Sirius agreed, looking up from the water.

"Thanks," Remus said and cast his gaze elsewhere. "I'm glad we didn't miss any school though. That would've been hard to make up. Though, you two don't do much work."

"At least we do the homework!" Sirius said indignantly but grinned all the same.

"Yeah! How else do you think we're getting good grades?" James piped up.

Remus fell silent as he tried to disguise his amused expression.

"See? You don't just us enough credit," Sirius said, smirking triumphantly.

Remus laughed for what it seemed like in the longest time. It seemes to send waves of shock throughout his body, giving him the familiar feeling he was convinced he would have never felt again.

"Then why do you complain about the work if you're so good?" Remus asked slyly, refusing to be outdone.

"Oh well," James said waving it off with a hand. "I'm plenty good at school anyway. I don't need homework and exams to prove it."

"Actually mate, you really do," Remus protested, raising his eyebrow.

"I hate all the work all the professors give us," Peter sighed and picked up a shell to admire it. He seemed to like enough for he stowed it away in his pocket and picked up a small stone and chucked it as far as he could.

"I think everyone does," Sirius said absentmindedly and skipped a flat stone across the surface of the water.

"True," Peter said, looking half impressed as Sirius's stone skipped four times before sinking. "They still give us loads of it though."

"Just because students don't like work doesn't mean they won't stop," Remus said and shrugged. "But I'm with you Peter."

"I think people agree with me," Peter replied.

Remus got up and brushed the sand off his clothes.

"I think I'll be going now," Remus said. "I'll come get you when we're going to leave."

The young werewolf left no room for argument and clearly he wanted or needed to be alone for whatever he was going to next so the three hung back with protesting. He didn't wait for an answer and walked off alone until he disappeared out of sight.

James frowned at his retreating friend.

"He really is trying to keep it all together," Sirius observed. "It's mentally exhausting for him though."

"Wish there was something we could do to help him. I mean Remus has been through so much lately," Peter said.

"Clearly," James said, watching Remus disappear from sight. "But I don't know what to do."

When James finished his statement, the latter fell quiet, lettimg the sound of rushing waves fill in the silence and founnd it rather peaceful. It soothed them as they were trapped in their own thoughts.

After several minutes of wading around in the water, Remus came jogging back. He skidded to a halt by the beach, took a minute, then stepped out into the water to join his friends.

"Turns out we're leaving now—by Floo."

" _What?_ " the boys chorused in disbelief.

Remus only nodded and motioned for them to follow him up the hill and to the house. The other three quickly did, grabbing their shoes and drying off their feet. Excitement buzzed in Remus for he was anxious to get back to school and was very ready to leave the house he now despised.

They crashed through Remus's kitchen and stumbled into their living room. There, Alastor Moody was leaning heavily on his cane, waiting for the boys; the pot of familiar gray powder was next to him.

The four boys lined up and the battle scarred Auror, grabbed the powder (muttering to himself the whole time) and shoved the pot into their hands, his magical blue eye swiveled around, it seemed to observe them as they shifted uncomfortably.

Remus went first, ducking his head and stepping into his marble fireplace, he threw down the powder while saying "Hogwarts" and was engulfed in emerald flames. The warmth licked his clothes until the spinning started and the living room, James, Sirius, Peter, Moody, and his grief started spinning away. James followed with Sirius behind James and Peter coming back last.

Remus landed on his knees in Professor McGonagall's the four boys all ended up in Professor McGonagall's office, they found themselves face to face with her.

"Glad to have you back, boys," she said with a weak smile. "It's been quiet here—less chaotic."

"Aw, I always knew deep, deep, deep down inside you enjoy our company," James said whose face split into a grin.

"You're getting carried away, Potter," Professor McGonagall said with a roll of her eyes. "And of course I'm dreadfully sorry about the horrible news, Lupin."

"Thanks Professor," Remus said in a hushed tone and cast his gaze away for a brief moment or two.

"Dinner'll be served in the Great Hall momentarily," Professor McGonagall said briskly and straightened her robes.

The Marauders filed out of her office, one by one without a word. The talked on their way to the Great Hall. The halls were empty except for a few professors lingering about in the halls but did not spot the four boys.

Remus was enjoying his time back but as soon as they emerged into the Great Hall, students whipped around and craned their necks to see who it was. When the recognized Remus's frame with the three other that flanked him, they broke into a loud murmur.

Remus was bombarded with questions from curious students whonwere trying to grab him and pull him this way and that. Getting lost in the sea of people, Remus wanted to blast everyone away from him.

The young werewolf looked around for his friends but they disappeared and now he was alone in a crowd of interrogating people.

"What happened?"

"Where were you?"

"Why did Dumbledore leave?"

Remus felt angry enough to shout at anyone and everyone but instead he lowered his head and shoved past them all, ignoring the inquiring looks he received. And turning the corner, he knew that he was automatically running to the Gryffindor common room, hoping that his friends were there.

Once he said the password (Professor McGonagall had reminded them before they left) the portrait swung open, the noise of the common room died out as each head turned to see who had entered. And without warning, they shot to their feet and started herding around Remus, firing one question after another at him until he groaned and backed away, not sure to where he should have run to next.

Once he broke out into a sprint, Remus gasped from the pain that was so immense, he stopped in his tracks and leaned heavily against the wall once he calmed his shaking breath. He looked down at his ankle that did not seem to want to work with him. But as students saw him again, they ran up to him, asking questions that Remus chose to ignore.

"Leave me alone," Remus demanded and inched away; in an instant, he started running again but ignoring the pain that danced up and down his leg.

He sprinted, flat out, down the corridor, shoving past people who tried to block him while trying to shut out everyone, and ran outside. Inhaling sharply as the cold air bit his throat. Thankful that there was not anyone out there except a few who did not notice him, he ran until Hogwarts was out of sight.

Breathing heavily, Remus stole a glance over his shoulder but did not see a trace of anyone else but he, himself, and his thoughts that buzzed in his head. Then an idea popped in his head, giving him the mental image of seeing himself perched up in a tree, hidden from all prying eyes.

Grabbing the lowest branch if a nearby tree, he heaved himself up the trunk and into the safety of the tree, getting lost in the tangle of branches. He was able to see ahead of him, watching the students walk around in the snow, conversing with one another.

Remus had stranded himself up in a tree, past the Whomping Willow and past the Quidditch Pitch. He felt as thought the pressure of people had temporarily evaporated. Ideas were running in his head though most of them were not his best. He knew he was not planning on going to the Great Hall where all anyone would just interrogate him.

When he decided that he would go the very same small island near near the departure of the Hogwarts Express, Remus started to lower himself until the sharp pain in his ankle made him stop. Remus thought getting up the tree was hard until he realized that getting down was the issue with an injured ankle.

The young werewolf was foolish enough to climb thirty feet up a tree, forgetting the details in the heat of the moment. So taking a deep breath, he presumed his climb back to the ground.

Move hand down, find good footing, dig other hand in trunk, lower yourself. Move hand down, find good footing, dig other hand in trunk, lower yourself. Remus repeated this process util he had made it five feet down the tree's thick trunk. But as soon as he let go of his grip on his left hand, he lost his footing, his ankle giving out and he scrambled for a grip but his left hand could not hold the rest of him up so he plummeted.

Twenty-five feet, twenty feet, fifteen feet, ten feet, five feet, smack.

Remus landed on his already wounded ankle again and felt the sickening pain lance up his leg. Groaning, Remus collected himself and got up in a sitting position. His ankle did not seem to stick out at weird angles but it hurt so he used the trunk of the tree to help pull himself to his feet.

He staggered and fell off-balanced. Remus tried again and managed to add most of his weight on his unharmed ankle. Once he started walking, his ankle gave away beneath him and Remus toppled over again.

Not knowing what to do, he just laid there on the snow covered ground shivering and thinking. If he could only get his friends' attention they could help him but shouting from where Remus was now was not an option.

He fiddled with his wand and an idea lit his mind.

Summoning all he could, Remus lifted his wand to the air, ignoring the cold and letting the memory of his parents sitting happily sent warmth to the very tip of fingers.

" _Ex-expe-expecto p—_ "

But he could not find the energy to send his patronus outward; Remus was beginning to think that he should wait for centaurs or some creature to find him but the frightening  
image scared him.

Remus, once again, tried to get up and managed to get a few feet closer to the clearing but collapsed. He got up again, struggling to his feet but this time with a stick as a makeshift cane. As he staggered on, his mind began to wander back to his mother.

And once again, her face, warm and happy filled his vision as it nearly blinded him. He pulled out his wand again and raised it to the air.

" _EXPECTO PATRONUM!_ "

Remus bellowed and a weak silver wolf burst from the end of his wand and stared up at Remus with unblinking silver eyes.

"Find James, Sirius, or Peter" Remus rasped, hoping that his patronus would be strong enough to make it the rest of the way to the castle.

He sat and watched the wolf depart, trapped and forced in his own dark thoughts which started traveling to his mother and father, now reunited, leaving their only son feeling worse and worse the more he pondered it.

The cold was seeping in as Remus watched his wolf disappear from his sight and the glow had gone. He fought to keep the happy memory his parents in his mind to fight off the cold.

Taking ginger steps, Remus managed to make it a little ways further before kneeling down in the snow and shiver, wrapping his arms around himself to keep warm.

Remus cursed loudly as he hit his foot, sending pain tingling to the very inch of his foot. He started crawling his way back, the snow melted and soaked his legs to the bone. Remus had only himself to blame for if he hasn't run so far into the Forbidden Forest he would not be stuck outside, he began to feel tired and depressed as he trekked through the snow.

The image of his mother's dead and frozen face was stained in his mind making Remus tremble uncontrollably and not just from the cold. Remus was beginning to recall all the previous events of his mother's death all over again and his father's death began to creep back into his mind as he really alone with his thoughts. He willed them to stay on a happy subject but they continued to return to those two specific nights.

Remus felt shuttering pain in his right shoulder after hearing the soft sound of hooves pounding the ground and pain in his right upper arm. He looked at his shoulder and saw an arrow had impaled itself in his shoulder. Remus looked up and saw the faintest outline of a figure; confused, pointed his wand at the mysterious man. He narrowed his eyes through his dizziness and saw a horse and a man.

The man raised his wand and a red light shot from the direction and hit Remus. But there was no pain, as he expected, but instead Remus felt airy inside, like all his problems have been lifted from his mind.

Remus was beginning to enjoy this new sensation, the feeling of freedom, to have no worries. His happy moment barely lasted a full minute; when all of the sudden he heard screaming, painful screaming.

"Remus! Please help me!"

Remus snapped out of his dazed state and looked around to see who was screaming for help. Something about the voice was achingly familiar. But before Remus could figure out who it was he heard another painful scream, a man cry out.

"HELP ME! PLEASE!"

Remus realized that it was his parents screaming. Then he heard three familiar voices scream his name. Remus looked around wildly to see his friends that were howling in agony.

"What—is—going—on?" Remus yelled, scrambling around to see where the screaming was coming from. And though there was no one, the screaming seemed everywhere, echoing in his head.

The screaming intensified the longer it continued; it was as if someone was pounding a loud hammer in his head that erupted a new person's screams of agony in his head until he thought it would split open. Clutching his head and groaning, Remus doubled over, screwing his eyes shut, trying desperately to block out the terrible agony.

"Nooooo," Remus moaned, shouting himself hoarse as his hands were over his head.

"HELP ME!"

"DON'T LEAVE!"

"PLEASE! PLEASE!"

"DON'T GO!"

"DON'T IGNORE ME!"

"PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE!"

"PLEASE HELP!"

The screaming grew louder and Remus was shaking, trying everything he could to block out the pain, the cries of agony. Remus started running away but no matter how much he ran the voices followed.

"PLEASE HELP!"

Remus saw the glowing light of his patronus and ran toward it, his blue eyes hardened into gold as he whipped around in every direction, trying to make sense of everything. His golden eyes were rolling wildly as he felt like he was going through his transformation as everything turned blurry. He could hear his parents, his cousin, his friends, everyone close to him screaming his name as if they were all trapped in a torture chamber.

Remus swore he saw his three friends but he couldn't tell through the blindness the screaming inside his head was giving him. The closer the three figures came running towards him the screaming grew louder until it forced him to stop running towards his aid. Remus slowly sank to his knees, bellowing at the top of his lungs as he tried shouting over the wails.

"NOOOO!" Remus moaned and started convulsing. "Noooo!"

Remus covered his ears with his hand as he let out a hoarse cry, repeating "no" as he was forced to listen to the tortured wails of agony that ripped his heart into pieces.

"NOOOOOO!" Remus shouted over the noise. "Noo, noooo, nooo!"

Then peaceful silence.


	17. XVII: Blood Moon Halloween

**All rights remain.  
This is going to be a little bit longer than usual.**

"First things first..."

Whenever one of the four Marauders said something along the lines of "So, here's the plan" or "first off" or anything similar, nothing good was going to happen (occasionally something good does come out of it). Odd enough, the strict one of The Marauders had been corrupted into joining.

The four of them were sitting at the end of the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. Everyone kind of stared at them, figuring something was odd about their position, considering anyone could always find them seated at the center of the table, basking in everyone else's attention. So, when they sat down at the end of the table, they did earn some weird stares.

"I know I'm a hot bloke but stop staring!" Sirius barked at a couple of girls.

They went red and flushed, shoving one another out of the way in order to make a hasty retreat. Sirius smirked, evidently pleased with himself, and James gave Sirius the thumbs up, encouraging the rude behavior. Remus merely rolled his eyes and continued reading the _Daily Prophet_ hoping some good news would show up in the papers one day. Most of the columns were about the horrible and unexplained deaths and murders of wizard families and muggles families alike.

"This is ridiculous," Remus said to himself, talking into his goblet. "This is the fourth one this month and the Ministry hasn't done anything!"

This seemed to capture the attention of his friends for they stopped conniving for a minute to see what Remus was talking about.

"Who died?" Sirius asked, frowning.

Instead of responding, Remus just gave them the copy of the paper, deciding that they could read it whilst he finished his breakfast. Toast and a steaming goblet of tea was the perfect combination for a wonderful breakfast (on the plus side, the tea had copious amounts of caffeine in it). The three of them huddled around the paper while Remus sat back and looked at his friends, wishing they could just go through one month without them having to pull some legendary act.

"Let's get going," Remus said, checking his wrist watch. "We aren't going to get in more trouble for being late to Herbology."

"That's just it, it's Herbology we're talking about! This class has got to be one of the most pointless classes at Hogwarts!" James said, snapping his fingers as if he made some great theory.

"That is not true," Remus said, lifting his chin to James. "Herbology is the study of magical plants. These plants are what saves everyone, Prongs. Have you ever thought about what Healers depend on?"

"Magic, their wands, more magic," James suggested, trying to keep up in the argument.

"They depend heavily on potions just as much as their wands," Remus said, keeping his calm demeanor. "These potions are made from highly complicated elixirs; in these elixirs are some of the most powerful magical plants, mixed into a poultice. It has been in Healer's potions for generations. Without them, half of the wizarding population would be gone."

"Okay, so what happens when humans use the last of the plants?" James asked, quirking his eyebrow.

"That will never happen," Remus said, sounding so sure of himself. "Humans know when things get scarce and when they do they do something about it. They cut back or find alternate ways. Humans can be resourceful when they want to."

"I think you are living in a fantasy," James snorted. "Moony, have you noticed the way muggles are chewing up all their resources? What happens when we lose touch of reality and think we can do these things when we just can't?"

"That will never be the case," Remus said and shook his head. "We are too selfish to allow something as disastrous as that to happen."

"You are contradicting yourself."

"No I am not. I am saying humans are too selfish to allow such an important aspect to their life go away. We will do something about it before it is permanent. I am not saying we have always done that in the past but I am saying humans know when things are getting too out of hand."

James gave up because he knew he already lost the argument. It was rather unfair arguing with Remus for the other was so composed and well-read, it was hard to get past on some facts without him contradicting them. Sirius and Peter were listening intently and broke out into an applause when James backed down, sitting back in the bench. Remus looked coy and a bit sheepish so he did his best to brush it off.

"We aren't sitting at the end of the table to argue; weren't we planning something?"

Those words were rather unexpected, especially coming from the one who said it. Remus never participated in The Marauders's pranks if he could help it. He did his best to disappear whenever his friends were conniving.

"Are you actually encouraging this?" Sirius asked, his eyebrows shooting upward in disbelief. "I suppose we should get to class and start discussing our amazing plans, eh?"

Peter and James shrugged whilst Remus was packing away the rest of his belongings into his bag then slinging it over his shoulder. The four of them left without another word to the rest of the Gryffindor table.

The walk there, they hardly spoke about their plans in fear of being accidentally overheard so they kept mainly to themselves. Trying, for all the world to know, to talk about normal things like the weather, they managed to get to their class on time.

"Boys?" Professor Sprout said then checked her wrist watch. "You're here early! This is a first!"

"There's always a first for everything, Professor," Sirius said with a wink because the Black heir soon decided that everything was better with a wink at the end. "Are you excited to see us so early?"

"Not really."

Looking bitten, Sirius scowled heavily and allowed his friends to haul him back to their original table right by the door. It was already preoccupied by a large plant looking far to innocent to be in fifth year Herbology.

"It's totally judging us," Sirius said, pointing at it. "It totally knows we are going to cut it up!"

"Shut up, Padfoot," James snorted playfully and pushed him away. "You sound like you're touched in the head and I don't want to look like I'm friends with someone who's afraid of plants."

"I'm not afraid of them," Sirius insisted stubbornly. "I am just being highly cautious and wary around plants. They always wait for the perfect opportunity to turn around and stab you in the back."

"Whatever."

Herbology was a class where the students were allowed to curse freely due to the loud volume of other people's voices. The Marauders were having trouble with this particular plant for it always poked and pricked them with their unnecessarily long and pointed thorns. What made this plant even worse was the fact that it could shoot these thorns every ten minutes when feeling threatened.

"There goes another one," Remus said and winced as James cursed loudly. "We have ten minutes to pull out the bottom leaves!"

"Then go!" Sirius shouted.

The four of them slapped their goggles back on and rushed into battle; the plant's branches were swinging wildly, catching them on their hands, wrists, arms, and shoulders, getting them with the thorns. Like everyone else in the class, they had removed their Hogwarts robes in order to move more freely. Unfortunately, they had several tears in their sleeves from this hot-tempered plant.

"It's got my tie!" Remus shouted and started tugging it away from the plant that grabbed it. "Give it back!"

James and Peter leaped into action whilst Sirius continued to pry the under leaves from the plant. James and Peter were trying to free the tie while Remus was giving up and trying it get it untied from his neck. It was tightening significantly and he looked odd, hunched over and fighting a plant at the same time. A few other Hufflepuffs came over to give him their assistance. Finally, after four people joined in the wrestling match, Remus was freed.

"This was my favorite," he muttered and tugged at the knot. "Let's just get this over with."

"Oooh! Moony rolled his sleeves up!" Sirius joked, nudging James.

"It's getting serious, no pun intended," James said and cracked a grin. "This means business."

"Great, instead of your obnoxious commentary, can we get this over with?" Remus snapped, yanking out a good handful of its under leaves. "There are still some under there but Peter and I got most of it."

"So it's your turn," Peter informed, taking a step back. "Be my guest."

By the time Herbology was finished, every student came hobbling out of the war zone with torn uniforms, tussled hair, weary eyes, and bloody hands and forearms. Their ties were either removed or askew. They looked like they just came out from an apocalypse. The Marauders came out, shrugging their robes back on as they headed towards their next class. Transfiguration was not much better but it was definitely much more bearable.

Or so they thought.

Professor McGonagall was in no mood to listen to her own house's complaints. The moment they stepped into her classroom, she hushed them all down and seated them quietly as she launched into a lecture. Lectures were the worst, especially coming from her. Professor McGonagall could go on and on about the same topic within her lecture, getting them nowhere else.

However, this was the perfect time for The Marauders to completely zone out and start their planning on parchment. James, Sirius, Peter, and Remus all had their enchanted parchment out with their ink bottles and quills ready, looking like they were taking notes.

-So, are we thinking in the Great Hall? -J

-Where else? -S

-I dunno, I was going to suggest the Quidditch pitch. -J

-It'll be too rainy. -P

-What about the full moon? -S

-It's the night before Halloween. We can still go through with the plan. -R

-There's always a "but". -J

-That is not necessarily true but there is one. I want to be alone for this full moon. This way I know I can't hurt anyone and won't have to worry about doing so. -R

-Sorry, mate. We already have this all planned out. -J

-I'm being serious. -R

-No you're not, you are being Remus! -S

-That is getting so old, Padfoot! -J

-It was funny the first few hundred times. -P

Sirius looked up from his note taking, kicked James in the shin, and scowled at Peter and Remus (because his kicking range did not quite reach over to his other two friends). James bit back an angry yelp.

-Prat and Remus, we are going to be okay. -J

-We just need some practice and the only way to do so is by helping you during the full moons. -P

-Look! We aren't here to argue this! We have bigger things to start planning! -S

-He's right; so who is bringing what? Who is doing what? -J

-What do we all need and what do we all need to do? We can't really do much tonight. We are just going to have work harder to get everything done tomorrow. -S

Yes, tomorrow was Halloween and no, they could not just sit there and do nothing about it. Without The Marauders, Halloween would be so boring so they took it into their own hands to make sure Halloween was not just another day.

-We need a distraction of some sort to give us enough time to get everything ready. -J

-How long will that take? -P

-A couple of hours at the most but who really goes in there during the day? -J

-Everyone. -R

-Then we will need an alternate Great Hall for the day for everyone. Moony, are you up for it? -S

-I don't have much of a choice. -R

The four of them began their well-developed plan as soon as they started bringing everything together. By the end of Transfiguration, they had their positions planned out but how to put it into action was what they had to figure out next class. Professor McGonagall assigned them a workload of homework for the weekend but knowing them, they were going to do it last minute (save for Remus, who will probably do it later in the day during their free period).

Their next class was Charms, an equally boring class. Professor Flitwick was a good professor and person, no doubt, but his voice was dreary and it was hard to listen when all he would do is drone on about the most irrelevant things.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Sirius asked as soon as they sat down at their usual desks in the back of the room (right by the door).

"I'm going out on a limb here but it is notes?" Peter asked.

"You read my mind, best mate," Sirius said with a wink (because he seriously believed winking made everything better).

Remus did his best to get some of his school work in; he tried, he honestly did, but when a glowing piece of paper blinded him every ten seconds because the enchanted parchment knew it was being ignored, it was hard to get any notes in. Sighing, Remus gave up and pushed his notes a little to his right whilst he trained his eyes on to the parchment, reading what notes had already made its way through ink.

-Why is Moony ditching us for notes? -S

-Again? -J

-Again... -S

-Someone go take his notes away! -J

-Let him write for a bit then I'll get him. -P

-Fine, are we going with Frank's suggestion? -J

-I think we'd be fools if we didn't. -S

-What he proposed is also really flawed. -P

-What do you mean? -J

-His way makes it easy for whoever is distracting to really get into some trouble. -P

-Who cares about getting in trouble, Wormtail? -S

-I do. -P

-If we can handle this properly we can get through it without getting in trouble. We just have to think of ways to preoccupy the professors long enough for the rest of us to get everything ready. We can pull this off if we work together on this, got it? -J

-Spoken like a true diplomat. -R

-YOU'RE HERE, MOONY! -J

-Taking notes was hard when there was a glowing parchment blinding you. -R

-Missed us? -S

Remus looked up and quirked an eyebrow at his cheeky friend, wishing he could talk out loud because he had such a great comeback but could only be understood with the tone of voice. Sirius flashed him an obvious smirk, making the werewolf scowl.

"Isn't tonight the Supermoon eclipse?"

"Oh, that's a thing!"

The students broke the concentration of The Marauders and the three of them could see Remus freeze and stiffen in his seat, turning to see whoever spoke. It was a bit strange to hear anyone talk about the full moon for no one was really interested in it (save for The Marauders).

"Do you reckon the werewolves will be out tonight? It's especially creepy with Halloween coming around the corner."

"There are no werewolves on Hogwarts grounds," another said, rolling her eyes.

"You never know where one could be lurking!" the boy replied.

Remus wanted to smack them both but he thought against it, believing violence to be improper and unprofessional. James and Sirius glared daggers at the back of the boy's head while Peter mouthed a string of cuss words and flipped him off. Remus, in spite of himself, could not help but chuckle at his friends' reactions to the boy's comments. Though he felt highly uncomfortable in the room, he felt better with his friends.

"Did you hear about the legends of the Blood Moon?" another asked.

"That's just an old tale! Get over it."

"No, it's real."

"Does it have to do with vampires and werewolves and other stupid and cliche monsters?"

"Not really. It was about the moon goddess..."

Remus gave up trying to listen. All he wanted to do was shout at whatever losers were talking about the full moon in such an annoying and flippant way and he was really tempted to curse them out, flip them off, then walk away. He felt his face heat up when Lily turned in her seat and sent him a knowing look and an agitated glare at the others. He shrugged, trying to play it off as something indifferent to him but it was unbelievable.

Going through Charms with students muttering supposed stories of vampire and werewolf sightings turned out to be one of the longest classes of his life. They were not whispering softly and Remus's enhanced hearing could catch every single word of every conversation milling about in the room. He nearly tripped over his chair, his book bag, and a few students in order to fly out of the classroom.

Professor Flitwick was surprised to see his star student leave in such a haste; he was going to acknowledge Remus on his admirable essay he had done but the boy was out of the classroom before anyone else. Frowning, Professor Flitwick turned to study Remus's friends, hoping he could catch on to something through the reaction of his other mates. There was nothing.

"Act normal," James hissed under his breath. "Professor Flitwick is watching us."

"Weird," Peter commented, frowning slightly. "Where'd he go?'

The Marauders filed out of the classroom int he most casual looking manner they could pull off without overdoing it. Once they were in the bustling corridors, they began their search for their friend. It did not take them long to find Remus sitting alone on a bench with his hands folded, his forearms on his knees, and his head bowed. His book bag was brushing the floor, probably collecting dust.

"What's going on, Moony? Talk to us."

James tried his hand at sympathy but Remus was never one to accept it. He always brushed it off with an awkward laugh and immediately changed the subject. He was never one for heart-to-heart conversations. Remus was more of the one-sided heart-to-hearts where he would listen to others pour out their souls for him whilst he remained silent about his.

"I'm just looking for something," Remus lied very obviously.

After he said that, he pulled his bag closer to him and pretending to rummage through his belongings, looking like he wasn't just lamenting. Sirius pulled a face and gently, ever so gently, pulled Remus's book bag away from Remus's shaking hands and knelt right in front of him, right in between his legs, bracing an elbow on Remus's knees and forcing Remus to look at him.

"What's going on? Was it what those bastards said during class?" Sirius asked.

"Must you swear?" Remus said but his voice was not into the chiding. "Watch your language, Padfoot."

"Language my arse," Sirius said, disregarding Remus's words in an instant. "If they were hurting you, Moony, I'd go after them, just say the word."

"It's okay," Remus said, trying to look anywhere but at Sirius. "They didn't know, how could they? Just leave it be."

"We're here for you, then," James insisted and sat down next to Remus. "What do you say we treat you out to something to eat? We know you are just going to head over to the library to read. Let's do something different today, shall we?'

"I really should be looking over my assignments just in case I missed something," Remus said, sounding so unsure of himself. "My grades are slipping as it is and I do not want them to worsen."

"Your grades are not slipping! You have two E's. That's not the end of the world," Sirius snorted, digging his elbows playfully into Remus's knees. "Come on, let's get something to eat."

"And I could be your dinner date, if I may," James said, sloppily planting a kiss on Remus's cheek. "What do you say?"

"I can't deny food when I'm hungry," Remus said with finality. "So I might as well agree."

They cheered and started their journey to the kitchen. They had to wait a while to be able to turn the corner that would take them to the large portrait of a bowl of fruit. Remus prodded the pear with his wand, which moved, and revealed a green door handle. Silently, they slipped past the newly formed door and basked in the overwhelming cold draft that flooded throughout the kitchen.

The second thing they noticed after the lack of heat was the attire the house elves were wearing. They had paper bags over their ears and plastic bags on their hands and feet. Their arms were still bare but the whole outfit was just strange.

"Hello?" Sirius said to one. "What is with the outfit?"

"It is to keep us warm, sir," the house-elf replied, shivering slightly.

"Why _is_ it so cold in here?" Remus said and blinked in surprise. "I can see my breath in here!"

"The cooling system is broken, sir, and we house-elves' magic cannot fix it, sir."

"All right, hang on," Remus said and dispatched from his group of friends.

One house-elf was wearing a hat and a pair of socks on his feet, which made James knit his eyebrows in confusion and slide his way over to the unique little creature. The house-elf stopped in his tracks when he saw James hurry over to him and he froze in his place, looking defensive.

"No, no," James said quickly. "I am not going to hurt you or anything. I just wanted to know why you are wearing clothes."

"Hunch is a free elf," Hunch said in a croaky voice. "Hunch has been set free by his masters, sir."

"I'm sorry to hear," James said, frowning slightly.

"That's good, isn't it?" Peter asked, breaking the silence. He looked awkward after he said that. "I guess it's not."

"No, it is not," James said and nudged Peter into silence. "Well, we do have a little order of food if you don't mind."

Several house-elves came, ready to listen. James started rattling off what they wanted for lunch and the house-elves were only too happy to oblige. They all huddled around the sinks, washing their hands before preparing the food. Pots and pans went flying everywhere and the fires were conjured on the stove. James had asked if they could make them just one large pot of clam chowder soup.

Remus, in the meantime, was casting several repairing spells on the cooler for the house-elves. After deeming it complete, Remus went back to join his friends, who were waiting for the food. When it was done, the soup was given to them in a large pot, magicked not to heat in its container, and allowed the boys to sit in the exclusive back corner right outside the kitchen with their meal.

The Marauders thanked them again on their way out and made their way to the little corner. Hidden and tucked away, there was a small rounded table, large enough to fit four in tightly. The large pot was put in the middle with a large serving spoon and the bowls were distributed amongst the four hungry students. Peter was the first to take some and James was the first to try it.

"This is surprisingly good!" James said after swallowing. "It's hot but it's good."

Remus tried to down some of the content and would have enjoyed his first bite if it were not for the fact he set his throat on fire with the hot food. His eyes watered as he downed half the glass of ice water in one gulp.

They laughed and talked and enjoyed one another's company for the remaining time they had that free period. When they were done, they hastily put everything into the kitchen, magicked it to their very large sinks, and hurried out, heading for their next class.

It was not that Remus hated Potions, it was just that he hated Potions. The Potions class was held in the Dungeons, making the atmosphere seem more depressing than it needed to be. They shared Potions class with the Slytherins and today, they had double Potions. It was going to be a long class for Remus, considering last class he ran out after being taunted and teased.

He was walking much slower to class, even hoping to be a little bit late, but they made in with two minutes to spare. They took their regular seats in the last desk closest to the door. It was quiet until the rest of the students started filing in, taking their places around the square tables, next to the cauldrons. Remus and Sirius hung around one end while James and Peter stood across from them.

"Are we ready to start?" Professor Hayes said once the class quieted down. "We left off with the Draught of Peace. This was a pretty complicated spell so I did promise all of you I would put up some instructions on the board to further help you."

"His advice is awful; it ruined Padfoot's potion and he had to start over," James said, leaning forward to whisper it to Remus.

"Are you joking?" Remus said, aghast. "That's awful, I know these take forever. I barely finished mine."

"I didn't finish mine," Peter said, sounding rather proud of himself despite the fact. "But he said we would have time to try again."

Potions was one of the classes where they could not take notes; they were forced on their feet, chopping up ingredients and stirring clockwise or counterclockwise. Their potions would turn funny colors and they would help each other correct it until it turned back to the right color. On several occasions, Peter had to reverse most of his potion and restart but the other three would kick in and help him out so restarting only took two minutes or so.

Professor Hayes was walking around, looking over students' shoulders to see their progress. Sometimes he would, like a good professor, go crazy with approbation. He would kindly suggest alternative ways to help students out and would even guide them in the right direction when they were stuck. Several Slytherins were struggling to get past the sixth step and Professor Hayes showed them how to do it.

When he came over to The Marauders, he only gave them all pats on the shoulders or backs and congratulated them on their outstanding performance. But when he neared Lily Evans and Alice Prewett and Frank Longbottom, he let out a shriek of delight. He seized Lily's arm and thrust it into the air, making her noticeable amongst the other students.

"She's done it again!"

Lily flushed deeply but accepted his praise and enthusiastic handshake. The Gryffindors cheered for her when she earned the Gryffindors twenty points. The Slytherins were looking sour, which only topped it off. To no one's surprise, James was cheering her name and clapping loudly. Remus shook his head fondly and mouthed "good job, Lily" to her when she caught his eye.

She mouthed back "thank you, Remus!" and beamed with happiness. She was, without a doubt, everyone's favorite (especially when it came to Potions class). She would be the one everyone would go to when they were stuck on an essay or struggling with instructions. She would always help but whenever James would come up to her and ask her for help, she would scoff and turn away.

Remus actually had Lily to thank for his average performance in Potions. She had taught him most of the things he knew today and without her, he would definitely not be getting an Outstanding it Potions. He was indebted to her.

"What do you think?" James said, gesturing to his cauldron.

"I think it looks pretty good," Remus commented fairly. "But you might have stirred it too much, Prongs. Look, it's supposed to be more runny."

"Whatever," James snorted and waved it off. "Professor Hayes won't be that picky considering all the students who couldn't even finish it today."

"Fair," Remus said.

Potions was not nearly as bad as he would have expected it. Professor Hayes was, once again, the bearable professor he had come to know. He was calm in his words and careful with them, acting much more considerate. He congratulated Remus as if the awkward dramatic exit hadn't taken place in his classroom and even awarded The Marauders ten points each for being the others to finish the potion.

"This day isn't half as bad," James said fairly.

The Marauders were the first to finish cleaning their place and the first to leave once they were dismissed. Their next class they had was History of Magic. Fortunately, this was their last class; Divination had been cancelled due to the third years going overtime on a certain subject, pushing the entire fifth year classes back a day. No one complained. Astronomy was tonight but Remus was excused and the other three didn't really care if they made an appearance or not anyway.

"Which way are we taking to History of Magic, the less crowded but longer way or the closer but more crowded way?"

"The less crowded," Peter decided rather quickly.

So the less crowded but longer way was the way they all took. Though empty, there were an unfair amount of stairs and the moving staircases seemed to change way too fast. The four of them had to run and wait at least four different times.

They much rather would have chosen to run up seven flights of stairs again instead of going to History of Magic. James and Sirius were silently dying inside and Peter and Remus were the lucky ones who got the best seat in the room—they were right next to a window that offered them a perfect backrest and it kept them out of plain sight, which meant they could lay their heads on the desks and not be seen.

Five minutes in, Remus was up and taking notes. Ten minutes in, Remus was still taking notes but his head was in his hand. Fifteen minutes later, Remus was no longer taking any notes, only listening. Sixteen minutes in, Remus was asleep.

It was strange to see Remus asleep in a classroom. The boy hardly allowed himself any sleep in their dormitory, so it was even more aberrant to see him asleep at a desk. Sirius nor James could keep their eyes of Remus—his legs were folded at the ankles and tucked away neatly underneath the chair.

His head was curled into his extended right arm. His left his face ever so slightly, offering him a hint of privacy. He notes were askew and his book bag tipped over and lay resting against his legs.

Remus looked very peaceful—it was the calmest they had seen Remus in a very long while.

"Look at him," Sirius exclaimed, smacking his forehead. "This will probably never happen again so take a good look at it now."

"Mate, he fell asleep on this class last year," James said, still staring at Remus. "Merlin, he looks so beat up and worn down."

"That's probably because he is," Sirius said fairly. "I hope tonight goes better. I have been doing my research and wolf behavior."

"Look at you," James said, lifting an eyebrow. "I'm truly impressed. Do you think it'll work out with you and Moony tonight?"

"I hope," Sirius said earnestly. "Think we should...er...get some sleep—we're not going to get much in the next thirty-six hours."

"Fine by me!" James chirped happily. "If you insist and all."

And that was just what the four Marauders did—sleep. It was not like they did not care about History of Magic. They cared about that class (albeit very little) they were just preparing themselves for an eventful two days. Today, they were all planning out their schedules for tomorrow.

Tonight, they were getting ready for the full moon. Sirius had done so much research the past week in order to fully understand the concept of wolf and werewolf behavior and how canines communicate. He did all this just so he could help Remus hurt himself less. Tomorrow they were putting their schedules into play, getting their newest idea ready for when tomorrow comes. Tomorrow night, no one was going to get any sleep. That was going to be evident.

They slept for the remaining forty or fifty minutes, which rejuvenated them enough (considering they got more than twelve hours of sleep on purpose last night).

Lily Evans was the only one whose head did not slowly rise when Professor Binns raised his voice. Remus started, rubbing his eyes wearily, frowning mostly at himself as he gathered all of his things in his arms.

"What's going on?" he muttered to Peter.

"He went over the history of a certain kind of bug that plagued the medieval wizard world."

Remus groaned and chided himself for falling asleep during such an important lecture. He stood up and once the class was dismissed, left the room in a haste to probably get himself caught him. No one stopped him this time. The Marauders merely followed him to the beech tree beside the lake and sat down around Remus, who was pulling out his History of Magic textbook from his bag, including his notes. Without further ado, Remus dove into the text. All that mattered was Remus got some sleep.

* * *

"How are you feeling, Moony?"

"Achy, very achy."

"What can I get you?"

"Nothing, I am doing fine."

Remus and James were the only ones sitting in the Hospital Wing. It was exactly an hour before Remus would have to go to the Whomping Willow so they took those precious sixty minutes together seriously. Peter and Sirius told Remus they would meet him in Hogsmeade in the Shrieking Shack since they were already down in Hogsmeade taking a forbidden trip to get their supplies for their latest plan.

Remus agreed it would be the most logical thing but he still felt uneasy about his friends accompanying him for the Blood Moon. Though he had never experienced a Blood Moon before, he knew it would be different. It just felt different to him. He could feel a different kind of pull towards the moon—it felt foreign to him, as if it did not settle in him very well.

"I really don't feel comfortable being around you when I'm a werewolf. It feels different, Prongs. It feels worse than ever."

"You worry too much," James insisted.

"I don't think you worry enough!" Remus said fretfully.

"All right, it's nearly 7:30. I think Madam Pomfrey will be here any time soon. I better get going but I'll hurry over and see you at the Shrieking Shack."

"Is there any possible way I can talk you out of this?" Remus asked, his blue eyes flooding with concern for his friends. "What if I lose control, slip up, and bite someone?"

"We'll be safe, don't you worry," James said with a wink. He was picking it up from Sirius. "See you around, Moony."

Remus watched in despair as James left the Hospital Wing before he could do any more convincing. The werewolf was sure he was going to hurt his friends and he would not risk it for himself. Getting up from the bed, he walked over to the double oaken doors and threw them open. As soon as he did, he was greeted by a very hasty Madam Pomfrey.

She pushed past him, grabbed her traveling cloak, and hurried over to the door. Remus blinked at her as if this was the first full moon at Hogwarts.

"Come on, Lupin," she said and checked her watch. "I want to get you down there within a reasonable time!"

"Right," he muttered, feeling even worse than before.

Remus followed her out of the Hospital Wing and winced as the cold wind bit his face, making his eyes water and his body shiver. He had to half-walk half-jog to keep up with the woman. Though she looked as if she was in her late thirties or very early forties, she still had such a demanding demeanor about her.

The walk there was not not unlike any other, covered the ground and distance in mostly silence; he bit his lip to keep from bursting out when he caught sight of a silhouette of a tall body. He knew exactly what that was but thankfully Madam Pomfrey was not looking in their general direction.

"Is everything all right, Lupin?" she asked when he stopped in his tracks.

"Of course," he said with a shake of his head.

"Then let's keep going. I want to make sure you get there with enough time to situate yourself," Madam Pomfrey said, straightening her cloak. "We are almost there, Lupin; let's keep walking."

When they finally did reach the Whomping Willow, its branches were losing its leaves. They would flutter with the wind and drop to the base of the trunk. The Whomping Willow groaned when it sensed company but it was instantly frozen with a flick of Madam Pomfrey's wand.

"There you go, Lupin," she said severely. "Take care of yourself and I will be there first thing in the morning to get you."

"No," he said quickly, thinking on the spot. "I actually feel better this time. I think this moon will be easier on me tonight."

"Weird, all the books say this full moon will be one of the worst..."

"Well, I feel absolutely fine," Remus lied persistently. "How about you come and get me at 7:00 instead of 5:00."

"That's asking a load," Madam Pomfrey said with a frown. "How will I know if you are hurt or not if I wait that long?"

"I will be able to walk back at 6:00 then if not 7:00. If I am not back by 6:00, then you came come and get me and give me the potions there."

She still looked puzzled by Remus's request but she obliged only after Remus vowed to keep his word. Vowing, Remus was allowed to leave with the new promise in mind. He came up with it quickly so he could give his friends a chance to relax and recuperate before she would swinging by.

Looking down the stone path leading to the Shrieking Shack, he started running.

* * *

James looked to his left then to his right. When he deemed the area all clear, slipped from underneath his Invisibility Cloak. James caught sight of Remus and Madam Pomfrey almost as soon as he stepped outside; he purposely wore all black but he was sure Remus was staring directly at him, knowing he was there.

When Remus disappeared, James quickly transformed into the graceful stag he was still getting to know. Four legs were faster than two but harder to function with. He was still stumbling and the weight on his head from his antlers made it seem even weirder but he was beginning to grow accustomed of his new skin.

It had only been a month, give or take a few days, since he and his friends became Animagi and they were still marveling at how they manged to pull such a feat.

Running was so much quicker, it amazed James to the point where he nearly tripped over his own four hooves. In no time, he was galloping over the bridge to Hogsmeade. He could smell the scents of Sirius and Peter in their Animagus forms.

No later than ten minutes after flat out galloping, James skidded to a halt at the Shrieking Shack. He nudged the door open with his antlers and slid past, closing it afterward. He sniffed the air and instantly transformed back into himself, jogging up the stairs.

He was the last to make it to the dusty room but he could see Remus, Sirius, and Peter all sitting in a circle on the dusty bed. He cleared his throat to make himself noticed and politely stepped into the room, eyeing Remus as he did. He looked wearier than usual, which greatly concerned them.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, frowning slightly.

"Absolutely sure," Peter said, patting Remus on the shoulder. "Are you sure you are all right?"

"What do you think, Wormtail?" Sirius snorted and seized Remus in an unexpected hug. "Our poor friend is exhausted from a long day!"

Remus chuckled and slid out from underneath Sirius's arms; it was so very rare to get a hug from Remus and it was nearly unheard of for Remus to be the first to initiate a hug so Sirius was not offended. He merely laughed and clung on to Remus's arm even tighter.

"Promise me you won't linger your transformations when I begin mine," Remus said severely, sounding very serious. "I don't want to infect you..."

Realization dawned on him and the thought that had haunted his mind for so long surfaced right before him when he looked at his three reckless friends. He paled noticeably.

"We know not to mess around," James reassured quickly, pulling the most sincere face he could muster. "We mean it this time, Moony. We don't mess around with stuff like this."

"Please," Remus implored, his eyes wide. "Don't make me a monster."

"Even if you did bite someone, you know it wouldn't be your fault. You can't control yourself," Sirius protested.

"I don't want to take that chance, Padfoot!" Remus insisted, turning his gaze to his friend. "So please do not make me regret myself."

"I won't," Sirius vowed.

.oOo.

Watching Remus writhe on the floor was pure agony.

Sirius whined hopelessly and nuzzled Remus's arm, trying to show somehow he was there for him. Remus was too busy trying not to convulse himself to death but he did twitch his fingers as if he understood the message. The transformation looked like the most painful thing ever endured.

More than anything, Sirius wished he could take Remus's place; he so desperately wanted, right then and there, to be the one stifling screams of sheer discomfort and pain. His heart physically hurt listening to Remus cry out then bite back another one.

The entire time, his hackles were raised and the fur on his neck was bushed up. He hadn't even noticed. But once Remus was finished and the werewolf emerged from the writhing mess, Sirius was back to his usual stance, ears pricked forward and eyes alert.

Sirius's tail was raised high but he showed no other signs of challenge, hoping what he read would be accurate enough. The werewolf merely sniffed the air, looked at Sirius for the briefest of moments, growled lightly, then started grooming his fur with his tongue.

Sirius barked and wagged his tail, bowing into a playful position. The werewolf cocked its head to the side and eyed Sirius weirdly, confused at the dog's behavior. Sirius, then, barked again and let his tongue hang out as he bobbed his head.

 _I think it's working,_ James said happily, tossing his head up and down. _All that reading did pay off!_

 _That's what I kept saying!_ Peter said, flicking his tail. _But you made fun of me and said I was turning too much into Remus and we could only handle one bookworm._

 _Oops,_ Sirius said with a little huff of laughter.

The werewolf broke their conversation when it padded up to Sirius and sniffed his flank. Sirius stiffened for the slightest moment before relaxing his stance and even tipping upward to lick the werewolf's muzzle in a sign of alliance. The werewolf responded with a lick to the ear and backed off.

 _It worked!_ James bellowed.

Sirius continued to bark happily and even started hopping around the werewolf's legs; it reared up on its hind legs then fell back on all fours, bowing into a playful position. Sirius was elated by now.

 _Think we could bring him outside?_ Peter asked very randomly.

 _I bet we could, Padfoot!_ James said, agreeing with Peter instantly. _We are good enough to keep him in check, you know? We could pull it off._

 _What? Would we go to Hogsmeade or something?_ Sirius asked, shaking out his fur and turning to look at them. _If you have enough faith in our abilities as a dog, rat, and stag, then let's go._

It was the most unusual decision, made in less than a minute but could have severe consequences. The werewolf followed the stag out the door, down the stairs, and right before the door. All four animals lifted their noses simultaneously to sniff the fresh air coming from the cracks of the exit.

 _This is it,_ James said, swiveling his massive head and nearly missing hitting his head on the wood. _We can do this, Padfoot, Wormtail._

 _I never had any doubt,_ Sirius said with a little bark.

The stag pawed the door open and the werewolf instantly burst past them, its tongue hanging out (very much like Sirius's) and started running in circles, just happy to be out of the stuffy Shrieking Shack. The animals just started running, allowing the crisp air to fill their lungs.

Sirius had never felt more happy, it was almost as free feeling as flying on his broomstick. He stopped, panting, and looked at the others, realizing just how crazy his life turned out to be. On top of befriending a werewolf, he was the nicest werewolf he had ever come across.

He looked at Peter and blinked; Peter was their glue that kept them all together even when times were really tough. He had proven himself over and over again to them (even though he did not have to) only to be underestimated even still. Peter's persistence was admirable and no one could deny his devotion to his friends.

He looked at the stag and felt another fervor of warmth fill him. He would be absolutely lost without James; it was frightening to realize just how dependent he had become on James's presence. James was the first friend he made on the train, right before Remus.

He become even more alarmed when he realized how dependent he had become on his friends in general. They were his family since his blood family had failed him (or he had failed them in their opinion). But he didn't feel bitter about his lack of a good home; where his friends were, his home was there.

After trekking back to the Shrieking Shack (James had to threaten the werewolf with his antlers a few times to get the werewolf moving at times) they all herded themselves into the dusty room and waited for the werewolf to transform back to their human best friend.

Watching the transformation again was just as unbearable as it was the first time. The werewolf was making much worse noises, howling with agony and biting and scratching itself by accident, trying somehow to alleviate the immense pain it was undergoing.

When the sun finally made its peak, the werewolf collapsed as if it was exhausted but in the heap, the body had shrunk and became more and more human like until Remus was lying in the werewolf's position, not moving and not responding.

After ten minutes or so, Remus finally did pick his head up and look around; there were not too many scratches on him and he looked much better than usual. He surely felt better.

And then his eyes landed on his friends.

He knew he owed his friends but he was not worried about settling his debt. He was worried what damage he had left on his friends but their coats were unmarked. There were patches of fur missing from James's flank but the fur was growing back and the wounds looked older, definitely not made tonight.

He looked at Sirius and examined him carefully. There were absolutely no markings on his body and his eyes looked bright and happy.

Peter was still alive, which meant Remus hadn't accidentally crushed him.

He was so happy, he nearly passed out from it. He even laughed to himself ever so quietly, rubbing his eyes in disbelief.

Sirius was right.

It worked.

Maybe this could be a thing.

.oOo.

"How are you feeling?" Madam Pomfrey asked as she gave him the potions she had made for him.

"I'm doing fine," he said with a shrug. "I told you the Blood Moon felt somewhat more at ease with my body than the regular."

"How peculiar," Madam Pomfrey huffed and frowned thoughtfully. "All my books say the opposite; I do see some new cuts around your face, especially your eyes, but other than that, you look relatively well."

"I feel it," Remus insisted, trying not to look too overexcited. "I don't know why but it was much better than I expected."

"That is good to hear," she said with a nod. "I do hope you will stay a bit longer, just to give your body a rest."

"I'm sorry," Remus said and downed the rest of the potion. "I have a pretty busy day and I can't really afford to miss any of it. I feel loads better!"

Madam Pomfrey really did not get much of a say because Remus was already rushing towards the door. As he left, he shouted over his shoulder:

"I will take it easy, I promise!"

* * *

 **It was not as long as I thought but long enough to have the original one chapter split into two.**

 **RoboTitaness: Your novel sounds amazing, I can't wait to hear more about it! If you plan on publishing it, I will definitely purchase it.**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: You have a great taste in words; I love it. You're amazing. If you don't mind me asking, what is your nationality? Do you speak any other language other than English?**

 **xXFadingNightXx: What instruments do you play besides piano? By the way, playing the piano is really cool and it takes a certain kind of skill. Not everyone has it so it's cool you do.**

 **Raven that flies at night: your dogs sound amazing. What are their names? What are they like?**

 **AMPM and seriouslyamellowfellow: Thanks for your fun reviews, mates! I'll see you in a few weeks for Christmas. I hope the weather is nice in Romania!  
** P.S: I am no longer reach the requirements for the valedictorian anymore...but thanks for remembering.

.oOo.

 **Did anyone else watch the eclipse that did not happen since 1982 and won't happen again until the 2030's? That is what this moon is based off of.**


	18. XVIII: Masquerade

**All rights remain.**

~HOURS EARLIER~

"You said you'd be up!"

Whoever was shouting, Remus was going to pound them into oblivion. Despite having a relatively decent full moon, he was still exhausted and was seriously in no mood to put up with people. No matter how much of a morning person he was, he decided he was going to hate everyone today.

"Curse this morning," Remus muttered. "It's not even 5:00!"

Then something rather large jumped on his bed; something that felt oddly unlike a human. Remus cracked his eye open and scowled at the big black dog in his bed, probably showering him with shedding fur.

"Get off," Remus hissed and tried pulling his legs from underneath the great body. "I'm too tired for this; when are those bloody potions supposed to work?"

"All you need is some spirit-lifting," James said, sounding way too sure of himself. "I bet I could do just that today. I bet I could loosen you up by the end of today."

"I know what you're thinking," Remus said.

He knew what was planned for today but he was surely not willing to get up at the absolute crack of dawn to get it started; the sun was barely visible, just poking above the horizon. When he moved, his entire body yelled at him but he ignored his protesting muscles all because Sirius wanted their plans to start at the earliest possible moment. He had no idea how long they intended to carry out their plan either so he was going out a limb.

"Are you ready?" James asked impatiently, pretending to check the wrist watch he never had.

"Let me shower and actually get ready," Remus snapped, hobbling past James like an old man. "Give me a break, mate. I would if you were exhausted."

"No you don't," James snorted but watched as Remus collected his things and moved towards the bathrooms. "You just rush me and tell me to move faster or you'll be late for class."

"Class is important," Remus said in his defense, his mind still groggy.

"And this is important for the people; stress has been eating away at students way too much," Sirius insisted, coming to his best mate's defense. "Come to think of it, I think we nearly have a full house."

"Great!"

* * *

PRESENT TIME~

"Is everything in place?"

"Everything."

James and Remus ended their calls on the two-way mirrors. Remus and Peter were running right around the entrance of the Great Hall and James and Sirius were waiting for their cues around the busiest halls during passing time. It really all was up to Sirius, Remus, and Peter to pull the entire thing off but James had to catch everyone's attention and who would be able to pull of a feat like that?

It was 5:10 to be precise and Remus was shoving his wand up his sleeve, poking his head around to see who was in the Great Hall. To his relief, there were only a few students milling about, walking around with their textbooks in their arms but not really doing much else other than talking. Remus looked back into the two-way mirror and called "James Potter".

"Mate?" James asked, appearing as Remus's reflection.

"Now!"

.oOo.

"Go, Sirius!"

James watched as Sirius began to change his form into the familiar black dog. Panting slightly, Sirius cocked his head and wagged his tail, examining himself. James rolled his eyes and looked at his watch, calculating the time. The classes were to be dismissed any moment and he wanted to get going before they did; with a short wave, James pulled out his wand.

" _Periculum_!"

It was kind of their default spell to get everyone's attention. It was loud and bright for the sparks could be seen miles away. Setting them off inside a building made the noise and light even louder and brighter. Instantly, students came rushing from the classrooms, the professors close in tow. What they saw was a very odd thing, indeed. As they poked their heads around, they could see James Potter running for his life with an over-sized dog chasing him.

The dog was barking ferociously, scaring half the students as it bounded past them. When James rounded the corner, Sirius skidded on his paws and turned to the students with his teeth bared. It was amusing to watch the students shrink back, pushing their way back into the classrooms whilst the professors advanced forward, rolling their sleeves up.

Just as they were aiming wands at Sirius, something flew past them. Everyone gasped and the dog was able to lunge at the nearest wand and seize it from the professor. The professor was absolutely livid but the same brown thing flashed past, knocking him off his feet. The dog barked and dropped the wand on the floor; it clattered loudly but other professors were advancing against him.

Sirius let out a warning growl, a real growl, but he was being cornered. He should have known this was going to be a bad idea in the first place but James convinced him that it would be a good enough distraction to keep everyone busy for a decent amount of time, allowing Remus and Peter to get themselves situated. The rest of their plan was more iffy but it was definitely worth trying.

Sirius was getting slightly worried at the twisted glares he was getting from his attackers and suddenly wished he thought it out better. He raised his hackles and bushed out his fur, baring his teeth and laying his ears back. He was no longer pretending but was actually for his safety. At the same time, he lunged at the most threatening-looking professor, something hefty and large barged past them, hitting them both.

With the wind knocked out his of lungs, Sirius got back to his paws and whipped around to see James (or rather Prongs) tossing his head and lifting himself on his hind legs in ridiculous attempts to rear. James swung his head from side to side, rearing and bucking away Sirius's attackers.

The professors were so stunned, they hadn't any idea what to do or how to react. Never had they ever seen such a creature inside Hogwarts walls. Something was odd about it and clearly, they knew something was going on (although illegal Animagi was the last thing on their mind). They thought it was some kind of strange transfiguration of a desk gone wrong or something so they started firing counter-jinxes at them.

Sirius barked loudly and launched himself at the offending wand; knocking the wand's aim off, saving James from being hit from a pointless spell that would have only hurt him. Sirius barely had any time before several hands started tugging at his neck fur, pulling him away from James and dragging him further down the hall.

James, bleating angrily, reared completely, boxing his forelegs in a sign of aggression. Flashing his antlers, he charged. The sound of his hooves sounded foreign to him as he scattered the professors, forcing them to relinquish their grip on Sirius. The dog and the stag reunited once they were free and hurried to one another's side.

 _Thanks, Prongs,_ Sirius panted. _I do not know what I would have done. We should have planned this better because now they are going after us._

 _I know but four legs are always faster than two,_ James said and bobbed his head. _If you know what I'm thinking, do it._

Sirius barked happily, wagging his tail. The one professor still on the ground was his new target. Sirius launched himself at the fallen professor and seized his wand. The professor let out a short bark of protest but Sirius and James were already gone like the wind, racing down the end of the hall.

The professors barely had any time to react but they were already firing hexes and jinxes to slow them down. Sirius, who was a bit slower than James, passed the wand over to the stag and watched as his friend took off on to open ground, the real place for James.

Sirius took the longer way but they eventually met back up near Hagrid's Hut. James was trotting by the time he met up with Sirius and Sirius's adrenaline was running high. They could still hear the professors barking orders and saying "accio" over and over again but to no avail.

"Hagrid! Catch them!"

James and Sirius both turned to see lights flood on in the hut. Hagrid came running out with Fang on his heels. Fang instantly stared at Sirius and stopped in his tracks; Sirius puffed out his lips in a form of a growl but Fang made an attempt to ignore Sirius's warning. Fang rushed at Sirius and the two of them rolled with the impact.

 _Padfoot!_ James shouted, stopping.

 _Go, mate. I'm fine!_ Sirius barked, grabbing Fang's paw in his mouth and clamping down hard.

As soon as he turned to continue his chase, Hagrid was there with his hands extended towards his face. James lowered his antlered head and started walking towards Hagrid, unafraid of the giant in his Animagus form.

Sirius was still wrestling with Fang but he was beginning to overpower the other large dog. Sirius was, fortunately and shockingly, still larger by weight and height than Hagrid's dog, but the other proved to be very strong.

 _Prongs, if you don't get moving, I am going to bite your arse,_ Sirius growled. _I mean that in every way so you can interpret that to your will._

 _I'd rather not._

With that, James launched himself around Hagrid and hurried towards the Whomping Willow. He had no real intention of going near the flailing tree but he skidded around it and hurried down the steep slope, his hooves skidding on the muddy hill. He could still hear the professors shouting behind him but he paid no attention to it.

With little traction in his gait, James slid down the rest of the way, losing control of his long legs. The impact hurt, crushing his ribs, but he managed to gather himself at the bottom and canter at a lighter pace towards the little lake.

He did not like being enclosed in the forest but he was able to remain pretty well hidden in the forest, using his natural fur color as camouflage. James watched as the professors came galloping down towards the lake, stopping at the sandy shore to see where he had gone. The sand gave him away until he ran in the soft grass just bordering the sand. After that, there was no sign of him.

"What just happened?" one asked, rubbing his brow.

"I don't know! One minute I'm teaching my class and the next I am chasing a dog and a reindeer!"

James scowled at being called a reindeer. He was most certainly not a reindeer! He was a stag, a proud and powerful stag! He shook his head and used the soft ground to his advantage as he sneaked back up the slope, hoping his trail was silent.

.oOo.

Meanwhile, Remus had an easier time getting everyone out of the Great Hall. He was not trying hard to be subtle about who he was, considering the professors were going to figure out who had started it all in the first place. So, he wasted no time trying to keep himself incognito. It was easy to get the students out of the Great Hall. All he did was say the professors cancelled classes and homework on their wish to vacate the Great Hall. The students obliged, just happy to not have homework. They all hurried out, leaving Remus the chance to securely lock the Great Hall's double doors. It closed with a bang.

Remus turned to face the Great Hall and looked about. Together, he and Peter pulled out their wands and pushed their sleeves up to their elbows.

"Are you ready?" Remus asked, raising an elegant eyebrow.

"Of course," Peter said arrogantly (or as arrogantly as he could).

Remus laughed and the two of them set to work. They first levitated the tables and to the sides; when they were all placed accordingly, Peter went around and started transfiguring the tables into smaller round tables. He messed up on the third table but Remus was right at his side, correcting his mistake.

"You just used way too much wrist movement with that one," Remus said kindly. "Otherwise you had it down."

Peter looked more than happy at Remus's words. The werewolf showed Peter how to do it and the shorter fifth year was able to do it successfully a second time. Remus patted him on the back in congratulations and moved to the other side.

"I'm going to get this side set up; we're going with two by thirty, right?"

"That's what Prongs wanted," Peter called back.

"Then that's what we're going with," Remus said with a shrug of his shoulder. "It'll look fine either way."

"Before we get started and all, how much time do we have?"

Remus checked his wristwatch and did some mental math in his head.

"Those two started around seven minutes ago so we have at least an hour to get everything set up, maybe two or three if everything works out."

"What happens if it doesn't?"

"Then we better hurry."

It wasn't much of an answer but the two quieted themselves down and began decorating the Great Hall. Remus was doing the right side and Peter was doing the left side; splitting off and dividing the work was a brilliant strategy but it was more difficult to do when Peter could not get the spells right; but Remus was just the right person to work with, always so patient.

"Hang on," Peter said after he duplicated his twelfth chair. "This one's a bit off; could you help me, Moony?"

"Sure, what's wrong with it?" Remus asked then understood.

Peter's transfigured table looked more like a transfigured chest; it was the wrong shape and definitely the wrong size. With a little correction, Remus was able to straighten out the problem and he was able to go back to his own. Unfortunately, this happened on more than one occasion. It happened every seven or eight tables; some were worse than others and took longer to correct and Remus was only on his nineteenth table.

They wasted about ten minutes just finishing up changing and rearranging the tables. But once they were all laid out exactly like they planned, Remus pulled out a folded piece of parchment from his robes and held it out for Peter to see.

"We finished the tables and put them where we wanted them to."

"We should probably work on the ceiling," Peter said and the two of them looked up. "That might take some time, practice, and definitely a few tries."

"Right you are," Remus said and stowed the parchment back in his pocket. "What was that spell Professor Dumbledore used to change it?"

"I dunno, he'd always change it nonverbally," Peter said with a shrug. "Just picture it in your head and see if that'll do anything."

"It probably won't but it's all we've got," Remus said and pointed his wand at the ceiling with Peter. "So are we thinking of the same thing?"

"We should be," Peter said.

Together, they ejected a blast of white swirling light from the tips of their wands and aimed it at the ceiling. The ceiling went from the day sky to night with the full moon out.

"That wasn't bad at all," Peter said with a hearty laugh. "I can't believe that worked."

"Did we just perform a nonverbal spell?" Remus asked.

"Doubt it," Peter said with a chuckle. "But it worked anyway."

"Oh, and a nice addition…"

Remus used his wand to create flashing lights of red, yellow, blue, and green. Peter applauded Remus for his creativity and the two moved on to the next thing. He pulled out his piece of parchment and studied it, looking at it with a careful eye.

"The next thing we should work on is the walls," Remus said.

The walls were easy enough; all they did was flash red, blue, green, and yellow colors, lighting up the room in the four House colors of Hogwarts. They were falling just under an hour of work by the time they deemed the Great Hall worthy.

"What's this?" Peter asked curiously, looking at a tiny little note on the bottom of the parchment, scrawled in Sirius's recognizable hand.

"Looks like something he wrote," Remus said and peered closer. It read:

 _Note to self and to my three best mates: This is going to be one of the best nights of the year so we might as well make the most of it. What do you say, mates? Are we going to find dates tonight or are we just going sit by and lament like losers? The masterminds of this amazing plan will not be showing empty handed._

 _Things to accomplish: Getting dates!_

Remus groaned, realizing he should have known Sirius was going to say something like that. Rolling his eyes, he shoved the parchment back in his pocket and shut off all the lights, concealing their hard work from prying eyes.

"What now?" Peter asked.

"We've finished in just under two hours; we might as well get this whole ordeal started."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we planned this great thing, we have to spread the word."

"How?"

"We're The Marauders, are we not? Getting everyone's attention is what we do."

The Marauders way of spreading the news was gathering the most people all in one place and screaming it at the tops of their lungs. Therefore, when they were able to get the school down to the Quidditch Pitch, the hardest part was done. How they managed to get everyone down to the field, including the professors was not too complicated. All they had to do was fly above everyone's head while shouting "free food at the Quidditch Pitch!"

It was scary how motivated people got in the name of free food. When the entirety of Hogwarts was down and standing on the pitch (save a few stragglers), The Marauders flew up higher on the broomsticks and magnified their voices to an unnecessarily loud volume.

"HOGWARTS, I AM SO GLAD YOU COULD MAKE IT!" Sirius shouted, extending his arms. "GUESS WHAT, HOGWARTS! WE HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU!"

The students barely showed any interest in what they were saying until Remus flew forward, skimmed a little lower, and hovered right before the mass of people.

"We have organized a formal party in the Great Hall."

Now heads were popping up in questioning. Remus smirked, suddenly finding it funny that he got everyone's attention with a simple sentence. The students began whispering amongst one another almost instantly after the words left his mouth but Remus raised his hand for silence.

"Thank you all for showing interest in what I am saying now," he said with a little chuckle. "You heard me right; The Marauders decided we needed some cheering up in spite of what has been occurring in the real world."

The students perked up, all looking up at them.

"So we decided to liven things up a bit with a party; everyone is invited! This party is meant to strengthen the bond of Hogwarts as one united school and not four separate houses or seven separate years!"

Remus looked around and waited patiently for the excited murmurs to die down.

"Without further ado, the theme of the party is traditional masquerade!"

"The lovely ladies get to go all out on decorating themselves with beautiful dresses and irresistible makeup and hair!" Sirius shouted. "But we are doing one thing as a school."

Peter flew down beside Remus and took his place on his right side.

"We are all attending the dance with masks like a real masquerade ball."

James came down and feigned confusion.

"But you never said when this party is."

"It starts at 7:00 and goes until 3:00! Happy Halloween everyone! Find or make yourselves new ball gowns! By the way, word on the street is house-elves are more than willing to quick whip up some original outfits, ladies and gents."

"Where can you find a house-elf at this time?" Sirius stage-asked.

"House-elves are available from 9:20, which is right now, till 3:00; the option is open and available to you!" Remus said. "Thank you, Hogwarts, and Happy Halloween!"

.oOo.

The professors were not quite as stoked as the students were but even they could not deny the excitement now buzzing in the school. Remedial classes, which were scheduled on that day, were all cancelled. The Marauders never really planned this out well but getting something acceptable to wear was just another challenge they were facing (just like the rest of Hogwarts). On such short notice, everyone was finding it hard to find the time to get an outfit.

The Marauders asked and even offered to pay every house-elf if they could magic up everyone's original outfit, which they obliged to; that was set up in several different classrooms. The lines were incredibly long and continuously going. Fortunately and by some miracle, by 1:30, everyone had what they wanted.

The Marauders had discovered something magical called caffeine and it kept them up and moving about for the entirety of the day. They had a restless night last night and had no sleep two nights ago. They were running on about seven hours of sleep from the past two days so they were exhausted. However, it was hard to be tired with the new spirit they could feel in the atmosphere.

The professors permitted but advised against them flying around on their brooms in order to monitor everything but walking took too long and took up too much energy. Another problem they didn't really think through was finding dates. Well, Sirius and James had thought about it but Peter nor Remus remembered.

The ugly truth came out when they overheard several different students asking one another out as their dates to the Masquerade. The sweet and loving words were enough to rot Remus's teeth and he shuddered at the sheer amount of cliché he felt swarming him. He veered his broom elsewhere with James and Sirius in tow and Peter beside him.

"Never gave it much thought, eh?" Sirius asked mischievously.

"What do you mean, Padfoot?" Remus said shortly.

"Did you think of someone you could take?"

"I'm not talking about this right now."

The clipped tone was enough to shut even Sirius up. Remus was never harsh with his friends but whenever he was, it sent a thorough message and was almost always taken very seriously. The other three backed off the questions for a while, allowing them to ease back to normal. Once the tension was completely gone, they had flown around the halls at least three times.

"I actually think everything's going pretty well," Remus said, checking his watch. "It's already 3:00."

"Oh my god! We barely have any time to find dates!" Sirius said, pretending to faint.

"Idiot, it doesn't start till 7:00," Remus said playfully.

"Don't you know, Moony? I need to get you more interested in the life of girls," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "On special occasions like these, girls like at least two hours of prep time before the actual thing. They like taking super long to get ready for dances."

"That's ridiculous but I'll take your word for it."

* * *

"What now?"

Remus was doing his best to find some time to get in some work but he was rudely interrupted by an unnecessarily loud sigh coming from his right. Sirius had collapsed in Remus's lap, effectively breaking his train of thought.

"This is an atrocity!"

"What is?"

"This!"

"The dance?"

"No."

"Then what?"

"Showing up to the dance empty-handed!" Sirius cried dramatically and slung his arm around the werewolf's neck. "Who are you taking?"

"I don't know," Remus said, disinterested in the conversation already. "I wasn't planning on taking anyone."

"You know, at first I thought you were going to say you weren't planning on going to the dance at all; I would have beaten you into oblivion if you said that, Moony," Sirius said, sitting up a little to look at his friend.

"Why would you?" Remus asked lazily, getting rather uncomfortable with Sirius in his lap. The extra weight was crushing his legs.

"You would have broken my heart," Sirius said and clapped a hand to his heart. "Seriously, I would have been hurt if you didn't show up. After all, we were the ones who organized it."

"I know, that's why I am going," Remus said and flashed his friend a dazzling smile before pushing him off his lap.

"Oi!"

Sirius landed uncomfortably on the floor with Remus looking down and smirking at him. Sirius scowled heavily and rubbed his back. Then realization dawned on Sirius's face as he rose to his feet. Remus managed to gather all of his books in his arms and throw them unceremoniously into his bag before Sirius was back in his lap.

"What are you doing, Padfoot?" Remus growled, trying to shove the other off. Unfortunately, Sirius clung on tight with his arm around Remus's neck.

"Moony! I forgot to ask you! What are you wearing tonight?"

"Dress robes like everyone else is," the werewolf answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Why? Were you expecting me to wear something else?"

"No, I was just wondering; what does your mask look like?" Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You'll see, Padfoot! Stop being so nosy," Remus said with a shake of his head.

The Black heir huffed and brushed the hair from Remus's eyes. The werewolf made a weird face and pushed Sirius's hands away. Finding this a game, Sirius pushed Remus back. Remus, deciding to end it before it started, shoved Sirius right off his lap for the second time.

"Prat!"

"Who's a prat?"

James came trotting in with a grim expression. Remus was about to ask what was wrong with him but then he caught sight of red hair coming through the portrait hole. James flinched when she sent Remus a friendly wave and ignored the others.

If the situation was not awkward enough, Sirius nudged James and nodded encouragingly at James then motioned to the fiery girl. James swallowed (his fear) and braced himself as he stood up. Remus opened his mouth to object but Sirius stuffed his sleeve in Remus's mouth.

James marched over to Lily and tried to catch her before she walked away:

"Oi, Evans!"

This time, for some unknown and unexplained reason, Lily Evans stopped when she heard her name. It was not because she heard her name (she recognized that voice anywhere because it was the voice of the person whom she loathed the most). She whipped around (sharply on her heels), her red hair flailing out her neatly tied back hair, and she glowered at him as he came galloping up to her.

"I know this is extremely last minute but I was wondering if I could accompany you to the Masquerade?"

"What do you want me to say, Potter?" Lily asked exasperatedly. "What I am supposed to say?"

"Yes," James breathed, his heart racing; this was one of the _very_ rare times Lily was talking to him with a civil tongue. It was like a dream.

"No," she said shortly. "Especially not with you."

Alas, even the best of dreams must come to an end. James tried not to look mortally crushed or like his heart and soul were ripped out of his chest and stomped all over. He tried not to let the tears even come close to his eyes, he tried to put on and keep his brave face on, he tried to keep the bravado from falling from his shoulders. James Potter was not immune to her insults; every one she shouted at him cut him deeper and deeper to the point where sometimes he just wanted to curl up and never come out.

"Why?" James asked, doing very well to keep his voice steady.

"Why do you think?" Lily snorted, growing cold once more. It was a pity James was in love with the coldest fire he had ever seen. "I am not going to allow you to degrade me, which is exactly what you would do."

"You think I would degrade you?" James asked, bewildered. "In what way would I degrade you, Evans?"

"What do you think? I understand there's not much up in your fat head but a huge ego but I think it'd be obvious," Lily ground out through gritted teeth. "I am not in the mood for your obnoxious guessing games."

"I wasn't trying," James said, looking vulnerable and hurt. "Why do you always assume?"

"I am not assuming, Potter; I have seen enough of you during the five years I have known you to know what you are like," Lily snapped, growing impatient.

"You don't even know me," James protested lightly.

"I know enough," she spat.

"Let her go, Prongs."

Suddenly, James felt a gentle hand on his shoulder, a kind and guiding hand; and the voice was as caring and consoling, understanding. Both belonged to Remus. James was more than grateful to have his friend pull him back. If Remus wasn't there to interrupt, James would have kept pressuring and prying her to see why she wouldn't take him and all she would have done was insult him and pick at his flesh until he was nothing but bones. He would have ended up hurting himself more than anything if he stayed there a moment longer.

But in the heat of the moment, James could only glare at Remus as Lily began backing away in a flurry. Remus sighed a little sigh and lifted his hands up slowly in a gesture of surrender.

"What was that for?" James asked, rounding on his best mate.

This caught the attention of Sirius and Peter, who sat up to see what was going on.

"Mate, you were only hurting yourself," Remus said but James barely heard him.

"Are you in some kind of relationship with Evans or something?" he asked, lowering his voice to a whisper. "You don't have to lie to me, I just want to know, Moony. I won't be hurt."

"That's a lie," Remus said with a scoff. "I would never put you through that pain, Prongs. I care too much about you to be that cruel. No, our friendship is strictly a friendship, a platonic friendship."

For some reason the words just stuck in his throat, making his chest tighten and his heart race.

Did he like Lily? He, of course, liked her but he liked her as his best friend. Imagining if he did not have her friendship was painful. Thinking of her as just another person reopened old and deep wounds. He officially ruined his friendship with Alice Prewett; there were days were he missed those days he spent with her and there were days were he wished he could just go up to her and say he was sorry for being so inconsiderate with her feeling. Other days, he was kind of glad he broke things off because he would have just ended up hurting himself anyway.

"Trust me," he said soothingly to his bespectacled friend. "You don't want to ruin your night chasing after girls who will only break your heart."

"I can't break it," James said with a shrug, rubbing the back of his neck.

"What do you mean?" Remus asked, frowning and withdrawing his hand.

"Lily Evans is the only one who has my heart; she is the only one who can break it."

Remus pursed his lips, unable to respond. He turned to Sirius, who was James's near twin, but the boy shrugged, apparently lost for words. Peter just motioned for Remus to quiet down then went back to conversing with Sirius.

"Why don't you try asking someone out tonight?" Remus suggested like a novice. "I don't think it can hurt."

"I'll see here tonight," James said with a defeated look. "I don't want her to think I am interested in anyone else."

"Maybe it's time for you to be," Remus said; apparently, it was the wrong thing to say.

"I don't give up on people, Remus! I won't back away without a fight because I want them to know how much they mean to me."

Remus's eyes widened but James continued.

"Maybe you don't because it's too much work and not worth your time. I don't know but I don't give up that easily."

Remus was properly silenced and James hurried past Remus, racing to the dormitory. James's words or tone of voice were not unkind but they got to Remus. James just left his friend standing there, lost for words. Peter and Sirius rushed over to Remus, grabbing him by the shoulders and turning him to face them.

"That was uncalled for," Peter said.

"No, no, it's okay," Remus said, though Sirius's shoulder muffled his words. "No, I understand."

What James said was absolutely true. He let the littlest things get to him when he was seeing Alice and he never bothered to talk it out. If he really did care about her, he would have done something other than ditching her. Remus felt a little bit worse about himself. At the same time, he knew he deserved James's harsh words. Without another word, he shrugged away his friends and managed to slide towards the winding stairs. Turning around to reassure his friends, he saw Lily Evans at the base of the stairs. He froze, realizing what bad timing he really had.

"I'm sorry," she said and hurried up the stairs. She put her lips close to his ear. "It's not like I won't _see_ Potter tonight."

Remus gave her a tight-lipped nod and stole a kiss on her cheek before he walked up the rest of the way, hurrying to his dormitory. The door was closed and locked but when Remus knocked ever so softly, it flung open to reveal James. Remus instantly blushed flaming red for no reason when he saw James but he did anyway.

The fifth year was no exactly modest with his body like Remus was but he was never Sirius, who put himself on display on a daily basis with girls. However, James was dressed in nothing but dress pants. Wherever his bloody shirt was, it was not covering his torso. Remus squeaked embarrassingly and backed out of the room. To make it even worse, he heard James laugh.

"Are you decent, Prongs?" Remus asked after he slammed the door shut.

"I'm decent," James called back.

Remus, against his better judgement, opened the door again to find James looking exactly like before Remus evacuated the room as quickly as he could.

"Liar," Remus muttered but he quickly moved to his bed.

Just as James opened his mouth, Sirius and Peter came bursting in. The two of them looked a bit winded and confused as to why the room looked so orderly.

"Can I help you?" James asked, tugging at his waistband.

"We heard the door slam," Sirius said and scratched his head. "We thought one of you murdered the other."

"Did you?" James said vaguely, scratching his chest.

The Marauders took the time to get themselves ready. No one was in the mood to take hours prepping but the fifth years did put in a little more effort than usual, making sure they looked halfway decent for the occasion tonight.

After an hour or so, all four of them came walking out looking and feeling very self-conscious. James, who was just flashing his bare torso, was trying to wrap himself up in his robes. Remus and Sirius were pulling at the knots of their ties, cursing whoever invented ties.

"How do I look?" James asked, throwing back his robe and posing. "Hot? Irresistible?"

James was not wearing his glasses, something he rarely went around without, but he cast himself a temporary sight-enhancer spell because it was quicker than getting contacts he did not own. Remus helped him perform the spell.

"Gorgeous," Sirius said and pretended to faint. "I can hardly control my libido looking at you."

"Whatever, prat," James said.

Making jokes like that were a normal occurrence in The Marauders; they were comfortable enough with one another to make those jokes without being awkward about it. Sirius and James were the ones who did it the most often. Whenever they mentioned Remus in their sexual jokes, the boy had a bad habit of turning red.

"Are we ready to go down?"

"We never did get dates," Sirius said dejectedly.

"Oi, we'll be seeing people tonight; we'll pick one up there," James said reassuringly. "Don't lose hope. The night's still young."

The Marauders sucked in a huge breath and yanked the door open. They must have been one of the last ones to go down because the common room was nearly empty, save a few sixth year girls. The Marauders saluted them (yes, even Remus saluted the girls) and they feigned fainting, flashing them winks. With a graceful move, they all slipped their masquerade masks, beautifully designed masks with exquisite feathers fanning out to frame their faces.

They saw a few more people, unrecognizable because of the traditional masks, on their way to the Great Hall and they were impressed at the effort people actually put into their appearance. Most of the girls' hair was pulled back and out of their face, flashing off their magnificent masks.

When they reached the Great Hall, no one could deny the décor choices. Remus had done a spectacular job getting everything just right. The entire hall was lit with the four colors of the Houses, plastered with Halloween decorations yet the windows were buffed and polished. The entire hall looked like a very grand ballroom straight out of the films.

"Good bad, what's the verdict?" Remus asked.

James turned to him and planted a sloppy kiss on the werewolf's cheek. He was beaming from ear to ear.

"You did wonderfully!"

James took the mask in Remus's hands and put it on for him, despite Remus's protests. The Marauders all had matching masks and dress robes. They wore tight dress pants, polished shoes, straight black ties, white button down shirts, tight black dress vests, and black dress robes to top it all off.

"Now you look ready," James said with either hand on Remus's shoulders.

"I couldn't have done it without you," Remus joked and James laughed heartily.

"I am going to go and mingle, perhaps find a certain redhead."

"Be wise with your words," Remus advised.

James waved as he broke off from the group. Sirius came up with his mask on, looking even better than he usually did (which many did not believe to be possible). Curse the lights he put Sirius under for all the girls were turning their heads in his direction. Sirius, who was used to and liked to be in the spotlight, waved to the girls and drummed his hand on his heart dramatically.

Remus rolled his eyes at his friend's antics and pushed Sirius away from the crowd of beautiful girls in beautiful masks. Theirs were studded with beautiful gems, feathers evened perfectly. Some of the girls and blokes had gloved hands.

"Monsieur Remus?"

Remus turned in surprise to see an unfairly gorgeous Lily Evans. She was in a bold red dress; her red hair was in an elegant knot in the back of her head with a few strands falling in her face. However, her face was covered in the most beautiful mask he had ever seen and he had seen impressive masks. Covering her face, was a golden cover bedighted with wondrous swirls and intricate designs.

"May I?" Lily asked. "Just one?"

"Of course."

The middle was crowded but around the edges were clear and just enough room to dance. Most students spread out about the Great Hall, dancing elegantly to the ballroom music playing.

Remus watched as Lily, who was wearing a big smile, started walking towards him. Meeting her halfway, he held out his hand and smiled when hers joined in. He grabbed her hand more firmly as she twirled away from him. Remus pulled her back to him, dipping her gracefully. He took a step back and she twisted her hand into his, raising it to eye level.

Remus's nervous gaze was stuck on what she was doing instead of looking at her; Lily noticed his anxiety and tilted his chin up, forcing him to look at her smiling face. They started waltzing around the room; Remus pulled his free arm behind his back whilst she carded her fingers through her hair though their eyes never quite left each other.

The music came to an abrupt stop before playing back up in a crescendo. She twisted in his arms and pressed her back against his chest, bending backward to place her hand on his heart. She spun back and danced around him with her hands on his midriff. His hands went chastely to her waist and they continued to waltz around the Great Hall, earning a few claps here and there from the watchers.

It was as if their legs entwined on their own accord as they danced about the room. She stopped moving and spun backward, turning her back on him. Gently, Remus turned her head towards him. Their eyes were glued in a haze but they continued to dance without a word. When the music hit its highest note, he dipped her and she pulled him closer by his tie.

At some point in time, the masks were abandoned, probably left on the floor but they were able to look at one another's faces without the piece of offending plastic hiding who they really were. Remus lifted Lily's arms up and placed his hands on her hips, keeping her at a modest distance from his body. Waltzing, Lily's hair must have fallen out when spinning around but she was just as beautiful with her hair down as it was up.

Their feet moved in sync; he could vaguely hear his name called out several times but everyone was too busy dancing with their own partners. When they stopped again, she hooked her leg around his; the music softened and she spun away from him, her hair swinging over her shoulder. He stood there with one hand behind his back and one in front, watching her dance with the red blue light dancing off her perfect complexion.

He opened his arms back up to welcome her back in when the music grew louder again. He took her firmly by the hips and hoisted her into the air. She hooked both legs around his waist as he spun for both of them, his face buried in her shoulder. The music slowed significantly but he never put her down nor did she ever make any sign for him to do so. Pressing their foreheads together, Remus spun around once then set her back on the ground. The two of them continued their waltz together until the music ended.

Several people cheered when they finished and broke apart. Remus acknowledged their praise with humble nods but he did not show much more interest other than that. Vaguely, he could see James staring at him but it was not out of jealously, it was out of pure curiosity. Sirius was grinning at him way too much and Peter was giving him the thumbs up. Alice Prewett was watching him through her own beautiful mask. Then he turned Lily and saw her only looking at him. Suddenly he felt guilty worrying about what everyone was thinking about him. If Lily was enjoying the dance, he would too.

"Thanks," she said and nodded at him. "Who would have known you know how to ballroom dance."

"My mum made me take lessons with my older cousin; he was obsessed with winning a girl through his dancing."

"That's one way," she said, placing a hand on his heart. "I think you've got me there."

"Lucky me," he said, looking at her. Breaking the moment, he added, "Do you want to rest for a bit?"

She broke off and laughed heartily before nodding; Remus guided her to one of the tables he and Peter made

From the sidelines, he could see everyone who was dancing. He caught sight of Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall dancing. He could see Professor Rauni and Professor Sprout dancing. Professors from all around were dancing except Professor Slughorn, who was just standing there rocking on his heels in time with the music.

"Is…is that Potter _dancing_?" Lily asked, gasping.

Remus followed her gaze and watched in hardly any surprise James dancing the same way he was with Lily with another girl from Ravenclaw. If James and the girl looked anything like he and Lily, his confidence just skyrocketed. James was magnificent on the dance floor. Of course, living as an aristocratic child, he would learn ballroom dancing; he knew James could dance but he hadn't any idea he could dance that well.

"Look at that!"

Sirius came up to join them; he handed Remus and Lily their masks, which they had dropped and left on the floor by accident. Accepting them, they put them back on and Remus moved to make room for his friend.

Sirius's hair was mussed but he was grinning broadly. His tie was loosened ever so slightly, his top buttons were undone, which was bothering Remus the entire time he stood there. Not able to help himself, he interrupted Sirius midsentence to button his shirt.

"That was bothering you, Moony?" Sirius said with a wink.

"Don't you dare, Padfoot."

Lily was giving them strange looks but did not look like she had any intention moving away. Instead, she propped her elbows on the table and leaned into the conversation.

"Remus has a chastity thing with us even though he's been living with us for five years now," Sirius explained, flashing Remus a knowing look.

"Does he?" Lily said more to Remus than to Sirius.

"No," the werewolf replied.

"Yes he does, Evans. You should have seen him tonight when Prongs . . . James. Come on, Moony. You have been our best mate since we were eleven years old."

"Not now," Remus pleaded.

"Come on and let me know," Sirius said, wiggling his eyebrows very inappropriately.

Remus was saved by a girl who decided Sirius had a long enough break; she was a pretty brunette but Remus had no idea who that was. Sirius shrugged and followed the girl, purposely undoing the buttons right underneath his chin; just to annoy Remus.

"Remus? Do you want to dance?"

Remus whisked around to come face to face with Alice. He thought he would never have to interact with her on such a high level again. Her false innocent expression was almost enough to fool him. . .almost enough. He pursed his lips and she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Is that a yes?"

Remus looked at Alice up and down, examining her but not judging her. She certainly was nothing like Lily in his opinion but she did have her fair share in beauty. Her short hair was pulled back in a small ponytail, allowing her beautiful gray and black mask to conceal her face. Her blue eyes stuck out at him; it was one of the things he noticed.

"Er, okay."

He allowed her to take his hand and guide him to the center of the Great Hall; he did not like the center, especially when people were watching him dance with Alice Prewett. It was not that he didn't like her, it was just that he. . . didn't like her.

Remus had to admit she was another good dancer but nothing like Lily. The flow felt like it was there but it just was not the same. She did most of the dancing whilst he stood there with his hands on her waist. He made sure to keep his modest distance between her and him but she seemed to be constantly pushing his boundaries.

She twirled into his arms, which immediately stiffened and he did not move. She bent on her knees and curled her little arms around his midriff and danced around him; she came up behind him and grabbed him from behind, closing her arms around his neck.

"What are you doing?" he asked, speaking for the first time while dancing.

He did not feel the same when dancing with Alice. When she spun away from him, he did not open his arms for her. When he dipped her, he did not get nearly as close to her as he did with Lily. He kept all formality with him, his right arm almost always behind his back as he danced with her.

Remus sighed, put on a smile for her, and then bowed to her, ending the dance early. Frowning slightly, she caught sight of her former dance partner walking away from her and going right back to her redheaded friend. She watched with a careful eye as Lily and Remus reunited with a hug that seemed to last too long. Though she loved Frank, perhaps she was unfair to Remus and once a fool for letting him go.

Remus enjoyed the familiar feeling of having Lily back in his embrace; he stepped back and looked at her, noticing her severe frown.

"Don't tell me something isn't bothering you," Remus said sternly.

"Why do you forgive people so easily? She broke your heart, remember?"

Remus chuckled and patted her shoulder.

"She's with Frank, remember?"

"I wasn't going as far as insinuating that. . ." Lily said, trailing off awkwardly.

Remus laughed again, making her laugh. The pair of them walked about the room and moved over to the food the house-elves and The Marauders made for the party. There, they met Peter (who Lily didn't hate nearly as much as Sirius or James). He greeted them modestly.

"Hello," he said shyly. "I was just getting something to drink. Do you want me to get you something?"

"That's not necessary," Lily said smoothly. "We were just getting some ourselves."

"Right," Peter mumbled and started shuffling away.

"Now hang on," Remus said and snagged Peter by the arm. "Lily wouldn't mind if you joined us for a brief moment. You can tell me all about your night so far."

"Must I?" Peter said and blushed furiously. "I am nothing like you. I know, you don't have to rub it in."

"Having a bad night?" Remus said sympathetically.

"Just a little," Peter said and buried his face in his hands. "I dance like I have no feet because people who dance with two left feet are still better than me! I think I scared away the girl I was dancing with."

"I'm sorry to hear," Remus said and patted his friend's shoulder. "But if she was scared off why is she coming back?"

Peter perked up and Remus's words and turned around; his face instantly broke into a smile as he straightened his mask and set down his cup. Remus chuckled and watched as the fairly pretty black haired girl met Peter with one hand extended.

"How did you like the food?" James asked, coming up to them.

Remus instantly stiffened but James remained at ease. The Potter heir was staring at Lily but he was talking mostly to Remus, addressing him instead.

"It was all good," Lily said through gritted teeth.

"Thanks," James said and tried to swallow but his throat was too dry. "Remus is a really good cook; he did a load of it."

"It was more of the house-elves but thanks, Prongs," Remus said and flashed his friend a smile.

Lily offered James a nod in return and he nearly burst into a melted puddle right on the floor, right at her feet. She took a sip from her drink to avoid talking anymore.

"Well, how was your night? I didn't know you could dance that well," Remus said, nudging James in the arm.

"Oh, thanks, likewise!" he said and rubbed the back of his neck, tugging at his tie.

"Where did you learn it?"

"I learned it as a child; our maid had a daughter and she was a dancer."

"Hmm," Remus said with genuine interest. "How old were you?"

"I was pretty young," James said then closed his eyes. "You are a very impressive dancer, both of you are."

"Thanks," Remus and Lily said together though with very different tones.

James pursed his lips and dismissed himself, bending over to whisper something in Remus's ear. It was lucky they were both the same height for Lily was definitely eavesdropping on what James was saying, probably thinking he was saying something about her.

"Okay," Remus said and patted James's shoulder. "I will."

James whisked himself away and moved out of view, leaving Remus and Lily together again. The entire night was on and off dancing, talking, and occasionally eating. The dance was lively and fun and Remus actually forgot the full moon was only yesterday.

"Thank you," said she. "For this wonderful night."

Funnily enough, The Marauders were one of the first to leave as well as being one the latest to show up. Several guests thanked them for putting on such a successful gathering. Remus nodded, realizing it was a Slytherin who thanked them. His night officially felt accomplished and when he left with Lily's hand in his, he felt on top of the world.

The two of them arranged to meet after changing into more comfortable clothing, he walked upstairs to find something he really did not want to find. As soon as he opened the door, oblivious to the surroundings, he opened the door on quite a sight.

Sirius was kneeling on his bed without the curtains drawn. A girl with lush waves of brown hair cascading down her back and over her front, covering her torso but not enough to keep Remus's eyes innocent. She seemed to have tied Sirius's hands together with his own tie! How dare she? The girl was splayed out on the mattress, her fingers ghosting across Sirius's trousers, teasing him.

Sirius's shirt was half undone and his voice was husky. Remus threw himself back down the stairs after slamming the door shut; he much would have rather seen a hundred James without a shirt than what he just saw there. He ran back down to the common room and put a\ concealing charm on the dormitory door, just in case Sirius didn't already.

Lily sprang to her feet when she saw Remus return, wearing the same clothes.

"What's going on?" Lily asked. "Weren't you going to change?"

"I was but my dormitory is occupied," Remus said slowly, hoping she'd catch on.

Luckily she did for she murmured sympathetically and took Remus's arm ever so gently and helped him shrug out of his dress robes. He shimmied out and carried slung it over his shoulder. Together, they made the walk over to an empty classroom where they practiced turning desks into couches. Unfortunately, they could only get to a fainting couch but it was good enough for them.

"I'll take the floor, Mademoiselle Lily," Remus said, gesturing grandly.

"As long as you let me make you a comfortable place on the floor beside me."

Lily pulled out her wand and flicked her wrist; levitating several chairs and transfiguring them into large and soft looking pillows. She set them down on the floor next to the fainting couch and motioned for Remus to take a look.

"Lovely," he said happily.

"Then let's get you out of that tie and vest," she said and moved over to help him.

In a few minutes, they were resting comfortably in the abandoned classroom with a muffling spell and a locking charm on the entrance. The two were just about to fall asleep, feeling their eyes droop with exhaustion.

"I had a good night," Remus said. "Thank you, Lily."

She just hummed in response, which was perfectly fine with him, but she turned over and brushed her fingers against his hand. Perhaps having two nights of little to no sleep was worth it.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading; I don't care how bad this was but I can pretend I do.**

 **xXFadingNightXx: Piano and you seem to fit together like puzzle pieces. That's really cool, what is your favorite song to play on there? What made you choose piano versus all the other instruments?**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: I think we should be friends; you sound awesome, I love awesome people! And people who enjoy different languages are awesome. That makes you double awesome (I apologize for the lack of eloquence).**

 **Raven that flies at night: Oh my gosh, those names are great; I love them.**

 **Robotitaness: my novel's fantasy; it's about three college boys sucked into a book while reading it, forced to live their lives as the characters of the book.**

 **5mairer: I got to see the moon, it was really cool.**

 **By the way, I based off Lily and Remus's dancing off my friend's choreography with her dance partner; it is pretty spectacular. Ballroom dancing is the only kind of dancing I know.  
** **Who knows how to dance?**


	19. XIX: Tears to Share

**All rights remain.**

"What do you mean?"

"I mean exactly what I said, James."

James froze, finding it strange (almost foreign) to hear his real name come from his best mate.

"I don't understand where I went wrong, Remus. Will you help me see it?" James imploree, sounding half genuine and half annoyed.

"You can pretend like you don't have an ego, James, but you can't fake it for anyone else," Remus said shortly.

"So why are you beating on me? I don't go around pointing your flaws out to you and everyone else," James said indignantly.

"That is because the rest of society doors that for you. I would give anything to be like you—a normal fifteen year old who doesn't have to worry about public disgrace," Remus bit out through gritted teeth.

"Why do you always make it about you and your condition, Remus? The world does not revolve around you. What are you trying to do? Guilt me because I am not a werewolf?"

Remus deflated, finally understanding. He understood what James was telling him and could not believe he had missed that for so long.

"I'm so sorry if you interpreted my words like that. I hadn't any idea!"

"Forget it, Remus. If you think I have some kind of unbearable ego or something, I'll leave you alone."

Remus heaved a great sigh, watching as his friend glared at him a he walked away. Lost for words, Remus looked back at his other two friends with some kind of helpless look. That merely shrugged, their eyes trained on the retreating back of James. For the first time in a long time, Remus felt absolutely guilty.

"He was right, wasn't he?" Remus asked dejectedly.

"He is not always right," Sirius replied, sounding much to sure of himself. "You were just as right as he was."

"I am sorry if I made you feel guilty about not being a werewolf. It was not my intention, I swear."

"Remus, relax. None of really think that. Prongs has no filter when he gets angry. After living with him for years, I'd thought you'd know that but now," Peter said with a little nod.

"Peter's right, you know. James was not being his normal self. I am not supposed to tell you but he gets really self conscious around you," Sirius whispered, looking around to see of anyone else overheard him.

"Me, why?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Why do you think, mate? You're hot and nice and you get along with Evans. That was something James does not have."

"As much as I appreciate your compliments, it's still weird to hear you can me hot—especially since I don't agree."

"Agree or not, it's what people see in you."

Remus was silenced again, feeling lost in his own thoughts as Sirius's words echoed through his mind. There was no way he ever considered himself a decent looker—he had weird scars and a very dry and sarcastic personality when someone got to know him. He was always envious of James—the boy always had a way with talking to people Remus wished he could have. There was a sort of charisma about James that was special; Remus bit his lip and looked at his fiddling and nervously moving hands.

"I know, it's shocking, isn't it?" Sirius said with a little click of his tongue. "The Great James Potter is self-conscious around the underdog."

"That's one way to put it but I wouldn't classify us like that," Remus said in spite of himself.

"Look, I know you don't believe me or think I'm on something but what I just admitted to you against Prongs's wishes is true—be careful not to tread on his heart too much. He gets that enough from Evans, we don't want that from you."

"She isn't mine to pursue, I wonder why he doesn't understand that already. How much clearer do I have to make it for him to see?"

"I think you might actually have to spell it out for him," Sirius said and shook his head. "It's a pity he's stuck on one girl, eh? He goes to a school filled with plenty of them—"

"Sirius, there are times where you should just stop talking...now is one of those times," Remus bit out, stiffening.

"Okay, I'll bite," Sirius said, unfazed by Remus's cold tone. "What's all this now?"

"What do you think?" Remus snapped, feeling worse for yelling at everyone.

"Was it because I spiked a few people's drinks?"

"Not quite but I want to come back to that..."

"Is it because I was mocking Snivellus?"

"Not quite but that's another thing I want to come back to..."

"Is it because I ditched that one girl after snogging her to dance with another?"

"You're getting closer," Remus said tensely.

"Is it because it of the night you saw me shagging that girl?"

"Bingo."

Sirius heaved a sigh and rolled his eyes, running a hand through his hair. He rubbed his hands together.

"You technically did not see me shagging her—she was just lying in my bed—"

"Without any clothes on!" Remus snapped, feeling his face heat up slowly. "That is not what I want to come upstairs to! You couldn't have gone to any empty classroom?"

"Remus, don't act so chaste—honestly, look at yourself! It's not my fault you're jealous...of me or something!"

Remus flared up, throwing his arms up in defeat. He cursed Sirius out and did his best not to lose it on the boy.

"Unbelievable, Sirius! You are unbelievable! Why do I bother conversing with you sometimes? What is with you lately? Why can't you look past your damn libido?"

"There you go again, Remus!" Sirius said, gesturing to him angrily. "Do you seriously think you are above your sex drive? Do you seriously think you won't want to have intercourse with anyone in your life?"

"Yes!" Remus said, rubbing his eyes wearily. "Not everyone acts impulsively because their libido is craving satisfaction!"

"At least I am not acting like some kind of sanctimonious god who is above everyone else in a fallacy of that stupid hierarchy of yours!"

"You seriously think I believe in a hierarchy? You are such an idiot, Sirius! You just want an excuse to blame me for something! Any person who has respect can control themself...any person who has respect for themself."

Sirius ran his tongue over his lips and broke eye contact, scoffing in disbelief.

"You have no right to judge me for my decisions—I didn't judge you for your problems!"

"I'm not going around having a one-night shag because I think it makes me look cool—that I am above...clearly you're not."

"Anything else you'd like to add?" Sirius growled.

"Yeah, I'm not here to fix or judge you. I'm here to guide you—just like what you've done for me in these past years."

With that said, Remus grabbed his book bag, threw it on his shoulder, and stormed out of the common room, not looking back once.

Peter watched with his mouth agape and completely in shock.

"You have got to be joking," Sirius said, rubbing his eyes. He turned to Peter. "I'm glad you helped me out there."

"Are you going to start yelling at me, too?" Peter asked, raising his eyebrow. "I don't know what has gotten into all of you."

"See?" Sirius said, waving a hand at him but not looking at him. "You are turning into Remus. We can only handle one—"

"You're an arse," Peter said bluntly. "I'm going to see you later."

The tone of Peter's voice made him look up in surprise. He had never heard Peter be so cold. First it was James yelling at him when Sirius was telling him to forget about the conceited Lily Evans, next was Remus scolding him about his life choices, and now it was Peter...what was happening?

This was the third fight he had gotten himself tangled into...maybe second if no one counted the little squeamish he and Frank Longbottom had regarding Alice. Remus was on his side during those fights—he even took his side when he and James were fighting about Evans. Sirius was convinced Lily was a she-devil only existing to make everyone feel lower than her but James countered and said he was not some sleeze trying to get every girl down before graduating.

Sirius was officially hurt by James's comment and wondered painfully if James actually thought that about him. So it was even worse when Remus called him out on his too-strong infatuation with girls.

What was happening to them? They were falling to pieces and it was only November! Sirius, for the first time in a while, dreaded his birthday. He knew he would be spending it alone—he had seen his friendship with The Marauders rockier than a boat at sea in a storm but he had never quite seen it like this. Every little thing was picking away at their friendship and it was hurting more than helping. More than once they tried talking it out only to start yelling at one another.

"Black?"

Sirius was seriously about to curse whoever wanted to talk to him but he turned around to see Mary, one of Lily's friends, hovering at his shoulder.

"What?" he snapped unattractively.

"You can stop with the attitude, Sirius. It won't make you feel better," Mary said calmly and soothingly, bless her voice.

"You haven't seen my attitude," Sirius said but he visibly deflated. "Okay, I'll bite. What do you want?"

"Nothing," she said with a shrug of a shoulder. "What would I want from you!"

"I dunno," Sirius said with a shrug of his shoulder.

"I can't help but overhear your fights with your mates," she said and clapped her hands together awkwardly. "I'm sorry but it's kind of hard to miss."

"I don't need someone like you stating the obvious, Mary," Sirius said and pursed his lips. "Sorry but I don't want your charity—so, if that is why you are here—"

"It's not," Mary cut in, holding up her hand. "I just thought I could talk to you."

"If it's about that night we had—look, we both gave each other our consent. We both agreed it would just...be behind us," Sirius said, standing up.

"That's not it either," she claimed, grasping his hand. "I promised you not to worry about it. I was okay with it...you were okay with it...we were all okay with it...I just want to talk to you."

"About what...Mary?" Sirius shouted, throwing his hands up in frustration. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Can we take a walk and talk?" Mary asked, arching an eyebrow.

"You seriously have the audacity to ask me that right now? Do I even know you very well?"

"I barely know who you are," Mary shot back but smoothly. "So it makes it better to talk about what we want to with one another this way."

"I told you, Mary. I don't want your charity."

"We can make this rief or we can make this hours longer than necessary. All you need to do is cooperate. I know it's a lot to ask from you, Sirius."

"You're rude," Sirius snorted and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Does the word 'privacy' mean anything to you?"

"I guess not."

"You know, this whole thing started because of girls?" Sirius said with a sarcastic snort. "Isn't it ironic that a girl came to see if I am okay."

"You are a womaniser, Sirius. Everyone thinks so, it's not just your mates who do."

"It's not that I don't care what others think of me whether or be a player but of it is affecting my friendship with the others...that's different, you know?"

"See, you honestly do care!" Mary hummed happily. "I always knew you did."

"Okay, what am I supposed to do now?" Sirius said, wringing his hands. "I lost two of my best mates and the third is so fed up with me by now he just gave up on me in all. Honestly, I would have given up on me a long while ago."

"Sirius, I do not want to hear you lament," Mary said unsympathetically. "I know Remus is one of the nicest human beings on this planet. I am sure with a heartfelt apology, he will come to reason."

Sirius huffed and shrugged his broad yet slender shoulders. Mary sighed and seated herself next to the troubled boy. She rested a comforting hand on his shoulder but it did nothing to stem his nerves. It only agitated him but she did not remove it.

"I really messed it up, didn't I?" Sirius asked, running a hand through his hair. "Why is it always me? Why does everyone else get punished when we insult Evans but not the other way around. And don't play stupid, Mary. I know Evans isn't the decent person to be around. I know she gossips like all you girls do."

"I don't...know."

"If you know Potter won't like you insulting Lily, why do you do it?"

"I don't...know!"

This conversation was getting him nowhere and it did not make him feel any better.

"I have to go now if you don't mind..." Sirius said and rose to his feet. "Thanks for the chat, I'll see you waved him off before sitting back down to stare at the fire going on in the common room. Sirius rolled his eyes and left, ignoring the Fat Lady's protests of being woken up. He rushed down the multiple stairs until he was out of breath but on the first floor.

From there, he just sprinted. He was running past everyone, ignoring whatever they were saying to him. Without thinking much, he ran into the Forbidden Forest and hid there until he caught himself on some brambles. Cursing, Sirius shrugged it off and continued to run. It was a long while before he stopped and looked over his shoulder, seeing nothing but trees behind him. He shook his head and transformed into the large dog, letting his paws take him wherever.

* * *

"I dunno where he went," James said, running a hand through his hair anxiously.

"Will you relax?" Remus snapped, trying to think where the idiot might have run off to. "He's not stupid. He knows not to get himself into trouble."

"Just...I know," James said, breathing deeply. "He likes the beech tree. We can start there."

Remus nodded and the two of them rushed off in search of their friend. They had no idea where Peter was but they were not going to waste time trying to find him. The pair of them rushed outside and towards the familiar beech tree right by the lake. However, they arrived to find it unoccupied. Its leaves fluttered in the wind, dropping off occasionally, but no sign of anyone there or in its branches.

"Hang on..."

James began transforming but Remus snatched his arm in worry.

"What?" James asked.

"Not here, not when everyone can see you."

James looked around then at the castle, deciding it was better if he wouldn't act so rashly. He nodded tightly and hurried down to the Forbidden Forest. Remus attempted several times to catch Sirius with his heightened senses but he could not find a trace of Sirius.

If only they hadn't started yelling at one another. Remus did feel guilty telling at James and now he felt even worse yelling at Sirius when so many others were doing the same to him.

"I can't stand it anymore—I'm changing," James said, stopping at the edge of the forest. "I'll be covered but four legs are always faster than two."

With that said, James transformed and galloped away. Remus was able to keep the stag in view as the animal ran ahead but he knew James wanted to go ahead.

"Go on without me," Remus said when the stag slowed down. "I'll find you...just send out a signal or something."

James nodded, his antlered head tossing regally and without another moment to spare, James raced off, leaping gracefully and nimbly dodging trees and soaring over its roots. Remus began to run, trying to keep the hindquarters of the stag in sight.

His mind instantly went back to Sirius—he would not have expected Sirius to run away like he did but Remus knew he had acted unfairly towards Sirius and only took out his frustration on the other, trying to make himself feel better. It was close to midnight and Remus sure the two of them were looking for a lost cause. It would be damn near impossible to find Sirius in the forest but the little voice in his head was telling him to keep trying.

Remus was running on ground for one moment then found himself plummeting the next. It made no sense, what had happened? He was falling down a ridiculously steep hill and he was only able to use his hands to break the impact of each roll. His feet were useless. It had been a solid ten seconds of just falling before Remus no longer felt the ground. He tried playing it out in his head—he must have fallen on a slope the fell off it...he had no idea how far away the ground was but he was going to find out anyway.

Luckily he only fell for about three seconds but the impact was enough to knock him breathless and feel the bruising already beginning to form. Remus groaned and removed the wand jabbing him in the back.

"Lumos," he muttered and looked around then looked up.

He fell off a pretty steep slope, which was unfortunate but at least he had hands to break the fall. Any creature unlucky enough to fall off the same slope would have been worse off but he didn't want to think of how many animals injured themselves. His light fell on a black heap and it did not take him long to know what it was.

Even though Remus had a pretty decent idea who it was, he was still rendered speechless. How could a single night go so wrong? Remus looked around, wringing his hands helplessly as his mind blanked on him.

"Periculum!"

The red sparks arced high in the air, then exploded, lighting the sky in dancing red colors. Not bothering to care if James got the signal or not, he raced over to Sirius's side and threw himself on his knees, subtly checking for a fall and rise of the flank.

When he caught sight of a faint sign of breathing, Remus checked over the dog for any physical wounds but found very few. When he ran his hand over the ribs of the dog, Sirius's eyes flew open and he instinctively bared his teeth.

"What are you doing on our border, werewolf?"

Remus started and whipped around—perhaps it was a cursed blessing he didn't recognize the centaur before him but he was definitely feeling both brave and intimidated.

"Do you know what happened to this dog?"

"Why would I care?"

"Something threatening could be on your territory by now!" Remus said then turned. "Why do you think I am always your enemy?"

"Werewolves kill for sport—"

"Centaurs do, too!" Remus retorted.

"Centaurs kill for warranted reasons—to rid the threats on our borders."

With that, the centaur seized Remus by the arm and hit him with something that sent bolts of agony through his muscles, making them seize up and cramp.

Remus instantly started crying out as the effects had not yet subsided. He was thrashing, his muscles freezing up as spasms of pain washed over them, making them stiffen. The pain was mostly in his legs but it felt like an unsharpened but large rock was digging into his back.

Vaguely, he could hear a grunt as two heavy bodies collided with one another. Looking up, he could see blood splatter the forest floor and the centaur backing away frantically. James was there, rearing on his hind legs; his antlers glistened with the evidence. Remus watched as the centaur reared up, trying to grab hold of the stag's neck.

There was a low growl from Remus's left and the werewolf turned to see the dog leap up and attack. Remus was startled into action, his hands fumbled around for his wand he foolishly dropped.

From the sounds of it, the fight was getting bloody—Remus winced visibly when he heard the utter scream the dog emitted when the centaur stepped on it. The centaur let out an unearthly cry when the stag impaled him again.

Remus's fingers finally closed around his wand and the fifth year sprang to his feet:

" _Everte Statum_!"

The centaur was lifted from its hooves and flew through the air—the impact with the ground sounded painful but they were free nonetheless. But before Remus could do anything else, the stag was turning on the dog, rearing up and slamming his forelegs right next to the dog's paws.

 _What were you thinking?_ James snarled, standing a little taller.

 _Avoiding you,_ Sirius retorted, baring his teeth.

 _Wasn't that going so well for you? You lasted what...thirty minutes without us?_ James said, feigning a thoughtful expression of the stag's face.

 _It has been hours, James. Stop thinking I am suddenly completely dependent on you. I can handle myself,_ Sirius growled, his hackles rising.

 _Again, you were doing such a great job fighting him off yourself. I shouldn't have interfered. Do you want me to take a step back?_ James asked, backing away.

 _Take a long walk off a short dock!_ Sirius bit, snapping his jaws.

 _That's original—I have never heard that one before,_ James said with a shake of his massive head.

 _Oi! Stop fighting!_

Both James and Sirius whipped around to see a small bald tail whipping into sight; a streak of gray flashed past then scrambled up James's leg. The stag spooked but realized it was only Peter.

 _Seriously, just leave me alone_! Sirius howled and tore off, letting his paws fly over the ground as he raced away.

Remus was busy attending to the centaur so he could not stop Sirius and James and Peter were both in their Animagus forms and had no wand with them, leaving them no choice but to chase Sirius on four legs.

Jame was the first to react, galloping after Sirius in his general direction, mostly depending on his heightened sense of smell. Peter clung to James's antlers with his tail but he, too, was sniffing the air, trying to catch whiffs of Sirius. About two minutes into running blindly, James came to an abrupt halt when his forelegs splashed in a small river, washing away all traces of the dog.

 _I lost him_ , James said and lifted his muzzle into the air. _I lost the scent._

 _So did I_ , Peter said and raised his nose to the air. _How did this even happen?_

 _We were fighting like idiots over the stupidest things_ , James said and sighed heavily. _It was all because I got angry over Evans—why do blokes like us always fight over females?_

 _I don't know_ , Peter answered truthfully. _I think we should leave him be, Prongs. He was pretty genuine—we should give him some time alone._

 _And leave him here in the woods at the dead of night? I don't think so!_ James said and shook his head.

* * *

Sirius watched as James and Peter headed off in a different direction. He waited an extra minute or two before he climbed the water. His entire body was shivering from the cold October night air, his wet fur clinging to every bone as it dragged him down.

Sirius shook out his fur the best he could before rolling in the grass beside the riverbed. Once he deemed himself dry enough, he transformed back into himself and wrapped his Hogwarts robes tighter. Though his clothes were dry, the night air was still crisp and sharp on his lungs. He looked at the wrist watch Remus gave him as an early birthday present ("It's part one of your gift, mate"). The little hands told him it was 2:12 in the morning. Sirius felt himself grow a little more miserable.

He knew had messed up badly. He knew it was wrong to insult his best mate's love. He knew it was wrong to degrade Remus like he did, telling him he was not good enough for anyone and lesser than the eldest Black heir. He had such an ego, he was destroying his friendship with everyone. He should not have been surprised when all of his friends left him.

"Happy birthday to you, you stupid, worthless, hopeless, waste of space," Sirius whispered to himself, plucking out a few blades of grass and blowing them out if his hand, watching them as they were carried away by the wind.

His heart ached and longed for his friends, staying up by the fire in the common room alongside of his friends, who were honestly the best thing in his life. He missed his friends and they had only been fighting for a few hours (granted the tension was there long before then).

He contemplated, pondering whether he should go back but he never did. Instead, he drew his knees up closer to his chest and wrapped his arms underneath his legs, resting his chin on his knees.

"You deserve every moment of this," he rasped to himself, feeling tears spring to his eyes.

He bit into the back of his hand as his quisling thoughts went right back to his friends. After James and Remus pretty much saved his life, they still could not stop arguing with one another.

"This is because of me," Sirius admitted to himself. "Why is it always me ruining everything?"

Sirius transformed back into a dog, hoping it would alleviate some of his painful human emotions. Once he did, all he felt was less complex. He could feel the hunger and the thirst, he could feel the need to groom himself. But yet, he could still feel the familiar dulling ache in his body, reminding him of all his troubles.

 _Why do I bother? Another ringing endorsement for the world's worst friend! Sirius angrily said to himself._

 _You don't think you're that, do you?_

The sudden voice made Sirius whip around in surprise. What was he talking to, he had an idea after seeing it. How he was talking to it, now that remained a mystery.

 _W-what are you?_ Sirius asked, lifting paw and becoming tense.

 _Wow, I get you are a dog and dogs aren't the smartest things but seriously, how do you not know who I am?_

Sirius was baffled; he was talking to a raccoon. A little thing with meaty little hands, out for the night to steal whatever it could.

 _I am not a dog_ , Sirius said, standing a little taller.

 _What are you talking about? Of course you are a dog. Again, I know your species isn't the smartest but you're really out of line here, pal_ , the raccoon said and tried biting on a nut.

 _I am a human, raccoon, we are the most intelligent species of the Earth. I am actually an Animagus_ , Sirius said, transforming into one for the raccoon before transforming back into a dog.

The raccoon looked stunned but it quickly shook its head and gave up on the nut, tossing it aside.

 _Would you look at that? What are you going to tell me next, your friend is half deer and half bird?_

 _Close! My friend is half deer and half human!_ Sirius said happily, finding it very odd to be talking to a raccoon but also really enjoying it.

 _Bless my soul, there are more of you_? the raccoon asked, eyes widening in surprise.

 _Not many but there are more like us out there. My other friend...he is half rat and half human,_ Sirius said and sat on his hindquarters _. Do you have a name?_

 _I would hope so! I go by Tic,_ the raccoon said and nodded his little head.

 _Not a bad name, Tic. I like it. I go by Sirius_ , Sirius said and wagged his tail.

 _Sirius, eh? Your name has a nice ring to it._

 _So, what did you mean when you asked me if there was more of us out there?_ Sirius asked, cocking his head go one side.

 _We rarely see Halfs anymore. We just see plain old boring creatures. We almost thought you went extinct or something,_ Tic said and went back to prying the nut open.

 _You believe in magic and that sort of thing_? Sirius asked excitedly.

 _Animals believe in nearly everything of old mythological history. We have seen unicorn and pegasi. What's not to believe?_ Tic asked, shrugging.

There was a pause in which both were silent, absorbed at their own will. Tic was struggling with the nut and Sirius was just bewildered about this entire ordeal. He just discovered a whole new world out there tonight—perhaps his birthday would not be so bad after all.

 _Let me help you with that_ , Sirius offered, rising to his paws.

 _If you don't mind_ , Tic said, handing the dog the nut.

Sirius took the nut in his jaws, careful not to swallow it, and bit down hard. At first he thought he would not be able to crack it but the shell broke easily under his massive teeth.

 _Thank you, thank you!_ Tic said gratefully as Sirius pushed the nut out with his tongue.

 _Sure_ , Sirius said and moved to lay down. It hurt his neck to angle his head looking downward.

 _So, why don't you tell me what you are moaning and groaning about,_ Tic said and started munching on his nut. He, too, laid down, ready for the story.

 _I wouldn't want to bother you with human problems, Tic_ , Sirius said, liking how the name sounded on his tongue.

I _t would be my pleasure if you would_ , Tic said.

And before long, Sirius found himself expelling his entire soul out to the generous raccoon who was willing to sit through everything. He ranted and raved about his lack of consideration he had for others and how he felt like he should just take a break from his friends because they probably needed a break from him. Tic lay and listened, catching every detail with a nod of understanding.

 _My friends, they are my life. I need them but do they really need me in theirs? Sirius asked. If I were human right now, I would be in tears but seeing as dogs cannot cry...I am in the safe zone there._

 _Listen because this is very important,_ Tic said, swishing his bushy tail. _Friends are there to fix every one of your flaws. Best friends are there to guide you but stick with you despite your flaws._

Sirius sat with his thoughts racing like a hungry storm. Of course, it made sense but now that he started reflecting everything, all of his doubts came rushing towards him.

* * *

"Why did we have to argue?" James moaned.

"We're irresponsible friends?" Peter asked helpfully.

"Oi, that is not what we are focusing on right now!" Remus snapped, feeling impatient.

"This wasn't my fault," Remus snapped, feeling agitated to the point where he wanted to get up and leave.

"You can't take the blame, can you?" James snorted, folding his arms over his chest.

"Not when it is not mine to take," Remus said, throwing his hands up.

"Don't go all righteous on me," James said and shook his head dismissively. "You yell at Sirius for being human, how is that any fairer than my argument with him?"

Remus loved James, he truly and honestly did, but when his best mate was acting like an idiot, he got a bit annoying. The werewolf swore he would never walk out on his friends and to this day has never broken his vow; but it was times like this that made him want to raise his voice.

"He is genuinely looking out for the well-being of your feelings, James. He is concerned Lily is hurting your feelings too much; he is trying to make you see because you are so blinded by this lust for her," Remus said, smacking his hand to his forehead. "Why can't you see he is trying to help you?"

"How would you like it if I went up to you and started insulting your best mates?" James asked, raising an eyberow challengingly.

"You already do do that, James!" Remus retorted, anger flaring up in his eyes.

"Who do I do that to? What other friends do you have besides us?" James asked, unfolding his arms.

There was a pause before Remus rolled his eyes and backed away:

"We aren't going to find Sirius by quarreling with each other. I'll see you later, James."

"Why is it wrong for me to get mad but acceptable for you to get mad?" James called.

James groaned and sank back into the wall, sliding down it with his fists digging into his eyes. He was tired and exhausted of all the fighting. It was not their first break-out they had—ever since the beginning of November, they were acting as if they were getting sick of seeing one another but all four of them knew it was not the case.

"Happy birthday, Sirius," James whispered quietly to himself, ignoring the awkward tears in his eyes.

Lily and Mary came down together, seeing what was disrupting their sleep so early in the morning. When they caught sight of James in the corner with his knees to his chest, head buried in his knees, and his shoulders shaking, they exchanged looks.

"Is that Potter? Is he crying, Lily?" Mary hissed, tugging at her sleeve.

"I can hear every bloody word you are saying, kid," James snorted, clearing his voice so it would not break.

"She is concerned for you, arse," Lily snapped defensively. "Be lucky she is—"

"Oh, will you shut the hell up, Evans? You are, for the first time, the last person who should be talking to me. Why don't you go punish some poor first year and get your annoying self away from me!"

The temper and coldness in James's voice made Lily freeze. It was one of the very rare times she had ever heard him talk like that. He rarely used it, reserving it for only the most appropriate times or when he was under great emotional stress. Granted, his cold tone was never directed to her so it came as a great shock to have it aimed at her.

"You know what, Potter? I—"

"—he's right, Lily. He could have said it differently but this time we could really go without your cruel words. As much as I hate to admit it, you aren't helping any of us."

Remus's soft voice carried all the way over to them. He approached them with an air of calmness to him, his expression completely impassive, but his eyes were genuine and sincere.

"Excuse me?" Lily said albeit her voice grew a bit softer.

"I couldn't find any other way to say it, Lily," Remus said without shame. "Don't worry, Mary. I'll take care of James."

Remus knelt down beside James, who instantly leaned into him and his touch. There seemed to be a permanent frown on the werewolf's face as he cradled James in his arms, wrapping two arms around the bespectacled boy's shoulders and clinging on with both hands. James's arms were draped tightly around Remus's neck, unable to say anything.

"I hope everything turns out okay!" Mary said as she started going back up the stairs. "We heard shouting so we came down to see what had happened...I feel bad for meddling."

"Don't worry about it," Remus said dismissively, waving a hand. "We will see you later."

Lily said nothing but whispered a soft goodbye to Remus before heading back up behind her friend.

"Prongs," Remus murmured gently. "Look at you, you're a hot mess."

The werewolf caringly pushed away the bangs covering James's face and carded his fingers through the already-messy hair. James closed his eyes briefly, glad for the comfort of his friend.

"Why'd you come back all of the sudden?" James rasped.

"Mate, do you really think I was going to walk out on you? I was just going to go upstairs to get some chocolate for us so you could eat it whilst I yell at you for being conceited."

James chuckled in spite of himself, wincing as he sat up. Remus shifted his position, turning his side to James instead of facing him.

"For one so usually eloquent with their words, why do you lose control of them when you argue?" Remus asked innocently, playing with his sleeve but fixing James with a firm look.

"For one so usually kind, why do you turn into this complete jerk when you argue?" James shot back, growing defensive immediately.

Remus sighed but he did not back down:

"You not only hurt me but you hurt Sirius, too—"

"Not only have you hurt me, Remus, but you hurt Sirius and Peter. Think of that the next time you want to argue with me, eh?" James growled, bristling.

Remus could not deny it, he could never forget the hurtful expression on Peter's face when Remus told him they did not need a petty peacemaker at the moment trying to cool things down. Sirius's jaw dropped and James's eyes widened in genuine shock.

"Let's give this all up," Remus sighed after a brief pause of silence. "This isn't working so let's just drop this. It will be easier for everyone."

"What?" James inquired, blanching considerably.

"I mean, we'll be better off if we do—we can't stand each other like this so let's just end this," Remus admitted, looking at James expectantly.

"What? No! I will not give up this easily, Remus!"

"Let it go!" Remus said impatiently.

"No, I'm not like that, I don't give up on these kinds of things, Remus, even when things get bad," James said, holding his head up high.

"Drop it, James! We won't find Sirius arguing like this," Remus said sternly.

James opened his mouth but his words died in his throat, making him look foolish.

"Are we talking about the same thing here?" James asked, motioning awkwardly.

"I don't think so anymore," Remus said with a shake of his head. "I was talking about letting the fight go."

"Oh!" James said with a huge grin. "I thought you were talking about our friendship!"

"I would never end our friendship, mate," Remus reassured.

There was an uneasy pause and then:

"Are you okay, Moony?"

Remus blinked in surprise, unable to answer James's question. But why were they having this conversation on Sirius's birthday? This day was to be about him but about Sirous. And on this day, the person whom they should be celebrating with was the person who ran away, evidently sick and tired of their bad attitudes. Remus felt sick with himself, realizing just how bad of a friend he was.

"Prongs, we ought to find him," Remus whispered.

"I might have an idea where he ran off to," James said, sitting up.

* * *

A sniffle. Another sniffle. Another sniffle.

Sirius was having one of the worst days of his life. He had some pretty bad ones in his day, living with his family and all, but this one hit him hard. He missed his friends, he wished he hadn't had that stupid fight, and he certainly wished he never walked (or ran) out in his friends, especially because they were saving his life.

"Happy birthday to you, fool," Sirius said to himself, drowning in self-hate.

"Happy birthday to you, mon ami."

Sirius whipped around in surprise, wiping his eyes hurriedly.

"You came back!" Sirius said observingly.

"Glad we did," James said.

"Because we were all being fools," Peter said.

"Look, mate," James said and moved to sit next to Sirius. "We will fight...obviously and we will spit curses at one another—all four of us—but we love each other regardless. We can't forget about that."

"Never," Sirius agreed hoarsely. "I would never forget our friendship."

"Cherish it, Padfoot," Remus said, sitting down and leaning on his hands. "It's a brave, new world out there."

Sirius nodded wordlessly, feeling like his birthday could not be any better.

* * *

 **Aren't you going to yell at me for all these cliché endings? What are some of your most memorable birthdays?**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: it's interesting how you find yourself in Remus—he really is a modest man—which means you must be, as well.**

 **xXFadingNightXx: I researched the two songs you mentioned and wow, they are beautiful and impressive! If I may ask, do you enjoy composing your own music?**

 **RoboTitaness: I bid you good luck on your story and hope you the best—it sounds like a promising one!**

 **Fruitstickers (Guest): I know you are on the fourth year but your comments are spectacular and really kind! I hope you start writing so that I may comment on yours!**

 **Willsignupsoon: I also hope you sign up so you can experience the world of fanfiction and all these seriously awesome people.**


	20. XX: Through Hell and Back for You

**All rights remain.**

"Remus," James whined.

There was silence.

"Remus," James hissed.

Remus's patience was really thinning out; the holiday break was coming up, he was swamped with "Holiday Homework here to make your holiday a fun but _educated_ filled break!" He was currently sitting in the library where it was supposed to be quiet, with books stacked high to hide his profile and most importantly, hide from his friends, who would not leave him alone (even if their lives depended on it).

Sirius may or may not have been the worst but two of the three were really bad; the third just sat there offering Remus no support in trying to get homework done.

"Moony, homework should never be your top priority," Sirius said seriously.

"Padfoot, I never take your advice," Remus deadpanned, pointedly pushing his books closer to him. "Now go away."

Sirius feigned hurt, quite used to Remus's snappy attitude and sarcastic tongue. He had been friends with the witty werewolf for years, he got used to the barbed comments.

"I've learned to become immune to your harshness, my dear Moony," Sirius said, plopping himself right across from him. "So yelling will do you no good and will certainly not make me leave."

"A beggar can wish," Remus muttered under his breath. "Why don't you help me then? What did you put for Professor McGonagall's essay, eh? Oh wait...nothing!"

"False," Sirius sang and made a dramatic scene of digging through his book bag. "Why, I am surprised you asked me. I have _mine_ and when I say _mine_ I _really mean mine_!"

Remus blinked in suppressed surprise as Sirius yanked out a long piece of parchment and waved it for Remus to see. No doubt in his mind, Sirius had done his homework! Remus stood with his jaw hanging down to the ground as he looked at Sirius's essay. It was even more than what Professor McGonagall required, dated three full days before it was due, and Sirius Orion Black had finished his homework before Remus. Now he had seen everything.

"Is this even possible?" Remus muttered, snatching it from Sirius's grasp. "Did you honestly just do your homework...and before me?"

"That's not the only surprise, my Moony," Sirius said and tipped his imaginary top hat to James and Peter.

"What is the rest?" Remus asked, now curious and worried.

James and Peter also made a production of pulling out their completed essays and handing them to Remus for inspection. After Remus spent the next ten minutes reading theirs, he could not help but be impressed. It really was not fair and now Remus felt like the unofficial slacker of The Marauders. He was determined to make his the best but he could not deny the accuracy and details of their essays.

"Look at us," Sirius said with a wave of his hand. "Aren't you proud of us?"

"I am and more surprised," Remus said, rubbing his eyes. "How did I let myself get this far behind?"

"Well, you helped us with our Potions essays...all three of ours so we thought we'd help you out here," James said and readjusted his glasses. "Aren't we your best mates?"

"You are now," Remus said sarcastically.

The three of them laughed and sat back in their chairs, watching Remus scribble a little, dive into his book, resurface to scribble some more, dive back into the book, and repeat the process. It was a glorious thing, watching Remus work. It was like watching an animal in its natural habitat; Remus, his previous years, almost lived in the library. He could always be found sitting at one of the round desks surrounded and drowning in books. However, ever since Madam Pince locked The Marauders in after Peter joked about her and Filch, he was more reluctant to coming to the library and resorted to using any available classroom.

"Do you love us again?" Sirius asked, clinging to Remus's arm.

Remus did get a little irritated when his friends were messing around in Potions and completely missed the entire lecture, which resulted into having a difficult time trying to comprehend the entire assignment. Transfiguration three days ago happened to be a particularly difficult lesson, trying to change a desk into a pig. Remus was struggling, which meant just about everyone else was struggling. The Marauders, however, seemed to have little to no trouble (excluding Remus) and was able to perfect it in about forty minutes into the lesson.

Professor McGonagall was impressed.

Remus was jealous.

Everyone else was amazed.

The Marauders knew.

The Marauders knew why this lesson was particularly easy; after human transfigurations, they found most of the spells quite simple. Perhaps it was like a cursed blessing but now Professor McGonagall was expecting so much of them and becoming quite suspicious as to why they were all so good in her class. She knew they were a few of the brightest students but she never pictured Peter not struggling, to her amazement, he was doing swell in her class. He seemed much happier to be in her room, where as before he absolutely detested it.

Remus seemed to know what was going on with her three students because of the glances he would shoot towards his friends. Professor McGonagall contemplated more than once whether she should go and pester the truth out of Remus but he knew he was a tough vault to crack and would never open up to her. Remus was a loyal friend through and through and a quiet man through and through, trustworthy enough for anyone to expel even their deepest secrets.

"Why don't you humor me and go somewhere else?" Remus asked when James started nudging Remus's leg with his feet. "Would you quit doing that?"

James sent a particularly nasty kick under the table and delivered it right to Remus's sore shin. The poor werewolf yelped but stifled it, glaring at James whilst rubbing his bruising leg. He was definitely not in the mood for his friends' antics and often wondered why he stuck with them in the first place.

"Christmas is right around the corner and we are loaded with homework," Remus informed but it sounded more like complaining. "I really want to get this done before break and break is in two days. Leave me be!"

"He is rude, isn't he?" a Ravenclaw asked, smirking at Remus.

"Sod off," he muttered, waving the boy off.

"Careful, don't let him hear you saying that," Sirius hummed.

Remus was about to blast the roof off the library but instead, he huffed as loudly as he could, shoved all of his books into his book bag and arms, and marched out of the library.

"This should be a sport, Annoying Moony," James said, snapping his fingers. "What do you say, my friends?"

"That must be the worst sport ever," Peter grumbled. "Moony won't be a fan of it."

"Oh well!"

.oOo.

Remus was rushing up the stairs when he collided with Alice Prewett. It was kind of awkward and most definitely unexpected. He had not talked to her in a long while and certainly not really one-on-one with her since he ditched her (rather rudely).

"Busy workload?" Alice asked, pointing to the books in his arms. "By the looks of it, I'd guess yes."

"Quite right," Remus said and licked his lips. "How are you getting along with all _this_?"

Remus hadn't any idea why he was feeling a bit anxious facing her but he put on a brave face and stuck it out as long as he could.

"I don't know, Remus," Alice said in a genuine tone. "All of this has been so hard and so much stress, it's impossible to keep up!"

"Tell me about it," Remus said with a shake of his head. "I just wish all of this stress would alleviate, it would help clear my mind."

"I think some stress relief would clear everyone's head," Alice agreed with a shrug of her shoulder. "How have you been holding up with things? I know it wasn't easy and I'm not sure if you enjoyed it or not. . .I couldn't tell."

"I don't know," Remus admitted. "I didn't like it for sure, I still don't like it for sure. I just think being reasonable and rationale is the best way to approach these kinds of things."

"I always thought you were one to work things out before taking drastic measures," Alice said and frowned deeply. "But you didn't do that."

"Of course I did," Remus said, slightly defensive. "I took great care in what I was doing."

"No you didn't," Alice protested. "You were hardly negotiable

"I still fancy you Remus, but I fancy Frank more!" Alice shouted, running a hand through her hair. "But clearly you are obtuse in. . .whatever this is."

"Wait," Remus said, holding up his hand. "What?"

"You heard me," Alice said, crossing her arms.

"I know and I don't like what I hear," Remus said and shook his head.

"You should have worked harder to keep me if you still fancy me," Alice said arrogantly.

Remus laughed without meaning to. He honestly was one the worst people ever at that point but he could not help at the lack of communication skills they had with one another.

"I don't fancy you, Alice," Remus said through his inappropriate laughter. "I don't fancy you. If there was anyone worth looking for, it'd be Lily but she is off limits and definitely would feel like incest, considering she is like my sister in everything but blood."

Alice looked even more confused, the poor girl.

"I don't want you still harboring any feelings for me," Remus said whilst taking a step back. "You were and still are awful to me even after everything; I seriously thought you would be able to handle this like an adult but you proved me wrong."

"You can be such a horrible human being," Alice said but for once did not burst out in tears. "You are conceited just like the rest of your mates. No wonder I chose Frank over you."

"You sound like you just came out of a poorly written romantic novel," Remus said, slapping his forehead. "I would still like to be friends with you, Alice, because I respect you as a person and still admire your courage and intelligence."

Alice raised her eyebrow at that.

"But you have got to get over yourself and whatever all this is," Remus said and rubbed his hands together awkwardly, especially since he was carrying books. "I am glad you are with Frank but keep me out of your love life. I don't think of you in that way."

Alice pursed her lips, unable to say anything.

"So I'd appreciate if I could get back to work," Remus said, looking at his books. "I am pretty busy with all the assignments the professors hounded on us today."

Alice threw her hands up and moved out of the way for Remus; the oblivious werewolf did not notice the hurt tears in her eyes. Remus was going his merry way when he ran into Frank. He and Frank were on speaking terms and were considered close friends (not as close as The Marauders) but Remus was really fond of Frank.

"How are you?" Remus asked, shifting his books in his arms. "Are you busy with work, too, or is it just me?"

"No way," Frank said and rubbed his eyes wearily. "I am just trying to finish up Snape's essay and was heading for the library for any books I could get."

"There's nothing down there, I looked," Remus warned. "Besides, my mates are down there annoying everyone. I'd steer clear."

"Thanks," Frank said and patted Remus's shoulder. "I can't wait for the holidays though!"

Remus chuckled and continued on his way. He always preferred a secret empty classroom on the second floor. He was the only one who would go in there; it was the perfect place to relax and sit back to enjoy the silence and get some work done or just to enjoy the silence by himself.

The second floor classroom was relatively small, much more so than the normal classrooms, which was why it was never used. Remus fell asleep in there more than once and woke up hours later, leaving his friends in a panic. He locked the room and spread his books out on the desk, trying to get things done all at once.

Remus really was grateful he was able to get his work done and over with but it was well into the night—he had lost track of time again. His wristwatch burned into his skin, telling him to be more considerate of the time and his friends. But the little voice in the back of his head reasoned with him—academic work was imperative as well. Remus put his wand down after practicing and nearly perfecting a newly taught spell, he rubbed his eyes wearily.

If Remus wanted a chance to get a good job with his condition, he better have impeccable marks. His hands on his watch pointed to the one and the six and it was dark outside, offering little to no light, which made it harder for him to see which hand was the hour hand. It was either 6:05 pm (am) or 1:30 (am).

When he stood, his legs gave away and he collapsed in a heap on his desk. He was sitting for so long, his legs were not used to the sudden weight. Attempting again, Remus stood up and hobbled around the classroom, trying to regain feeling in his numb legs and feet. When he finally managed to master the art of walking, Remus walked back to his desk and started packing away his things.

He neatly put away his carefully done essays and tucked them into his bag. His quill and ink bottles were a bit less carefully thrown in his book bag, and his books were either in his bag or held in his arms. Ready, Remus swung the door open.

Unfortunately, when Remus walked out, he collided with another person, and it hurt. The pain went to his skull and immediately sent shockwaves up and down the rest of his body. Groaning, he turned to see who he had run into—it was Mulciber, walking like a righteous king with his nose high in the air.

"Isn't Loserapolis that way, Lupin?" Mulciber snapped unattractively.

"Isn't Stupidtopia over there?" Remus retorted. "I think the Kingdom is missing its king."

Mulciber reacted so quickly, Remus had no chance to do anything but fall in on the impact. Mulciber shoved Remus against the wall and held the boy by his collar.

"I dare you—try me," he snarled in Remus's ear. "I won't regret it."

Remus yanked out his wand but Mulciber knocked it away.

Remus struggled to pass air to his lungs after Mulciber was pushing against his chest with his arm. He tried shoving Mulciber off him but the Slytherin merely yanked hard on Remus's tie and pulled him close.

"I mean it, Scum," Mulciber said and brought a fist to Remus's eye. "Don't hurt me again or I swear I'll end you!"

"I'm sorry!" Remus shouted as his eye throbbed. "Get off me; you weigh like a young elephant."

"Insult me again," Mulciber said, sending a blow to his face with ringed fingers. "Leave me alone—"

Mulciber did not have the kindest dialogue, cusswords normally found their way into his sentence, almost every other word. The other took Rus's tie and yanked it hard, smirking as Remus went down with the drag.

Mulciber cussed him out again and walked off, feeling proud of himself. Remus crawled over to his wand and tried performing a pain-reducing spell but to no avail. The pain was intense, it felt as if he had been dragged down a road by his neck and he felt as if someone had taken a saucepan to his head for it was spinning dangerously.

Remus's head was clearing up but his motive to move was dissipating. He merely pushed up against the wall, leaning his back against it for support, and tucked his legs in close to him. Remus pulled his books closer, hugging his book bag close to him for it was one of the most important things in his possession. Checking to see what damage Mulciber did, he was more than devastated.

He was discouraged. All of his hard work he had done before the break was absolutely ruined. Mulciber had knocked the ink bottles in his bag, breaking them and causing all the ink to soak the parchment to the point where his beautiful work was no longer legible. Cursing at Mulciber, Remus yanked out all of his work then pulled out his wand, trying to use magic to clean it up. Even with the ink out, his parchment was in poor condition.

Remus frowned, looking at his ruined belongings, then shoved them all away. He felt foolish but he could not bear to look at everything he had worked so long and hard on ruined in a matter of mere minutes. He pulled the book bag to his chest and buried his face in it, his nose pressing against the fabric and inhaling the smell of ink. He was so tired and exhausted from everything, he was calling it quits, which was very un-Remus-like.

Before he could find somewhere to sulk alone, hidden from sight, there was a tap on his shoulder.

"Prongs—if you ask me one more time—"

As Remus looked up, he realized he was certainly not looking at James, Sirius, nor Peter, but Bernie from Ravenclaw. Remus felt like a bad person for not remembering Bernie's last name but at least he knew the Ravenclaw's name.

"Are you all right, Remus? I saw Mulciber running from something and then I saw you…" Bernie said, sounding unsure of whether he should speak or not. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"It's all right," Remus reassured, pushing himself but catching his tie in his book bag, making him stumble.

"Ties are seriously the worst invention," Bernie said with a chuckle. He tugged at his own blue and white tie. "Girls think ties are attractive on blokes while we think they were invented to bring discomfort around your neck."

"Yeah, always hated these blasted things," Remus said, still trying to free himself.

Bernie laughed again, a rich and kind laugh, and moved forward to assist the struggling Gryffindor. Remus, breathless because the tie had tightened significantly around his neck, thanked Bernie for his help and together, they were able to pull themselves free.

"Again, thanks," Remus said and tugged at the knot, loosening it. "Do you have any plans for the holidays?"

"None so far," Bernie said with a shrug. "Or at least that I know of. How about you, spending the holidays with your mates?"

"Most likely," Remus said and grinned. "Where are you headed off too? It's nearly 2:00 in the morning."

"I always had trouble sleeping," Bernie admitted, sounding less guilty being caught by a Prefect. "Are you going to turn me in, Prefect?"

"I might just have to," Remus said, scooping down to grab his book bag. "I'm just heading back..."

Bernie looked a bit awkward, shuffling on his feet, and looking anywhere but at Remus; luckily, Remus was a pretty easy-going bloke and gave Bernie a reassuring pat on the shoulder before sliding past him.

"Wait," Bernie said, scratching the back of his head. "Do you want to walk around a bit? I dunno, I just can't fall asleep."

Remus bit his lip, looking torn between getting some sleep before heading back later in the morning or going back to rewrite his entire essay. He pursed his lips, looking at his feet, before he shrugged and nodded.

Bernie's face lit up and the two of them headed off down the corridor, taking themselves wherever their feet led them to. They talked about everything from Quidditch to school to famous witches and wizards. Their conversation was all over the place but enjoyable nonetheless. Bernie loosened up when around Remus and though they rarely talked out of class, it was a nice change.

Remus was not close friends with anyone out of Gryffindor mainly because his life revolved around The Marauders (not that he didn't want it to because he definitely made sure his life revolved around them) but he did not have the time to focus on making friends from other houses. Talking to Bernie was a nice change.

"Why weren't you put into Ravenclaw? You are incredibly smart," Bernie said, motioning to Remus. "Did the Hat consider it at least?"

Remus heaved a sigh, it was not something he talked about with others very often. What went inside his head mainly stuck inside his head because no one really bothered to ask. He never gave it much thought but whenever it was brought up, he always tried to avoid having people ask him what the Hat considered for him.

"No," Remus said with a shake of his head. "The Hat immediately put me into Gryffindor...no consideration for Ravenclaw...or any house for that matter."

"I kind of expected that answer; I would have been more surprised if the Hat _did_ consider you."

It was well past four before they broke off in different directions to head back. The common room was empty and quiet, which was a first, but everyone was asleep at this hour. It was surprising everyone was considering there wasn't any classes and they were leaving but no one seemed to have been awake. Remus hurried up to his dormitory to find his friends asleep with the lights still on.

Frank Longbottom stirred when Remus slipped past his bed and nearly fell on the way. James did not stir but someone else was looking at him, it was Sirius. Remus bit his lip and tried to stay still, looking right back at Sirius. The Black heir did nothing for a while until he swung his legs off his bed and hurried over to Remus. Remus, pulling a face, held his hands up but Sirius only grinned, white flashing in the dark.

"Where were you, Moony?"

Sirius's tone was not demanding but it was curious and soft, questioning in a gentle manner. Remus expelled the story in detail as they sat on Remus's bed together, cross-legged and facing one another. Sirius nodded, occasionally shifting the pillows when they sunk too low. Remus, shifting his legs every once and a while when his feet would lose its feeling.

"Bernie Wells, you hardly speak to the bloke, why start now?" Sirius asked, pushing his hair back.

"I dunno," Remus said earnestly. "He asked me if I wanted to just walk around and talk with him. He's actually not that bad."

Sirius pulled a face and the entire time Remus was recalling the story, he noticed how Sirius's face grew from impassive to guarded. At first, Remus blew this over his shoulder, not putting much care into it but it could not be ignored the longer he went into the tale.

"Hang on, Padfoot," Remus said, moving to his knees.

"What?" Sirius said, sitting back a little after leaning forward to listen intently.

"You aren't jealous of Bernie, are you?" Remus asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Why would I be jealous of that foul git?" Sirius snorted, trying to pull it off with a royal scoff.

But Remus was not falling for Sirius's exterior. The boy wore his heart on his sleeve, easy to read and understand even if he didn't tell anyone. Remus moved closer to Sirius then sat back on his heels.

"He's not replacing you or anyone. I won't invite him to become a fifth Marauder."

Sirius did not reply.

"There's always been four of us," Remus reassured, placing a firm hand on Sirius's shoulder. "It's always been us, Padfoot. It's always been Wormtail, Prongs, Padfoot, and Moony. There won't be room for anyone else."

Sirius still did not reply. But Remus was patient, he looked at Sirius intensely through the darkness, trying to get the message through the Black heir's thick skull.

"No matter what happens to us, we are the original Marauders; no one else will change that, Padfoot. Wives, other friends, children...they won't be the same as you or James or Peter."

"No matter what?" Sirius said, sounding very child-like.

"No matter what," Remus echoed reassuringly.

"Even if something bad happens to us?"

"Even if something bad happens to us," Remus said with a chuckle. "We'll go through Hell and back for one another. Stop worrying and go to sleep, Padfoot. We all could use some."

Sirius sighed but eventually moved to his own bed in his own thoughts whilst Remus dwelled in his. Little did they know, Peter and James were eavesdropping on their conversation right from the start, smiling to themselves in contentment, and still were when the lights went off.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading, I appreciate it.**

 **Fruitstickers: thank you very much for all of the kind comments. I appreciate each and every one of them. I do hope your day has been well.**

 **xXFadingNightXx: It's always great to hear from you; if you could be good at any instrument, which would it be and why? I also hope you have been well.**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: You have a unique persona, which is nice. I definitely think we would get along well.**

 **ampm and seriouslyamellowfellow: I love Romania, it's such a cool country, I can't wait to go back some day.**


	21. XXI: A Christmas Tale

**All rights remain.**

"Will you...Sirius?"

"Anything for you."

Andromeda and Sirius were sitting with their heads bent and close together, whispering amongst each other as they did. They were talking about something quite secretive and Sirius, biting his lip, continued to nod as Andromeda's lips moved quickly to form coherent words. Remus, Peter, and James sat back, waiting for their mate to finish.

They saw Sirius pat Andromeda's back reassuringly, coaxing her with gentle and persuading words. Andromeda bit her lip, looking nervous and about ready to protest. However, Sirius was already pushing her away as he moved to get away. When he sauntered over to The Marauders, he looked a bit winded and breathless by the time he arrived.

"What's happening?" James asked with his hand on his hip. "I know you just signed us up for something."

"Did you?" Peter asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"I'd rather it not be a surprise," Remus chimed in.

"All right, all right," Sirius said, giving in and throwing his hands up in surrender. "I may or may not have volunteered us to babysit Andromeda's daughter—that sounds extremely foreign on my tongue—for a bit while her and Ted get some time to rest and relax."

James deflated, Peter sighed, and Remus took a step back. Sirius interpreted the entire thing wrong and he soon went on a rampage of words, speaking in a flurry the point where he could barely be understood.

"I'll do everything! You can just sit there and look pretty—not that you don't already, you do—but I just did not want to be alone. That makes me sound like I'm codependent on you or making you sound like my personal slaves. You can always head back to Hogwarts—I can meet you back there—"

"—Padfoot, relax," Remus said, holding a hand up to interrupt Sirius's never ending ranting. "We'll all be happy to help out."

"Of course," James agreed with an enthusiastic nod. "We all love Andromeda and Ted—they're both great so we'll help out, too."

Sirius looked so relieved, he looked like he was going to pass out. But Remus steadied Sirius with a firm hand to the shoulder and slipped past him. Jamesaughed, clapling Sirius on the back and moving in to stand next to him. Peter flashed him a smile before moving over to join Remus and Andromeda and engage in their conversation.

"Thanks, mate," Sirius said, leaning so James's ears could be the only thing that hear what Sirius just said. "I appreciate it."

"We're here," James said, leaning in.

.oOo.

Nymphadora was introduced the very next day, bright and early in the morning. The Marauders were lucky at least one of them could handle mornings—which was Remus, so he was able to speak on behalf of his mates. Andromeda presented them with a long list of instructions.

"She loves spaghetti. If you make it for her, you'll be her best friend. She likes movies but musicals make her all wiry and hyper. I don't suggest watching any before bedtime. Her bedtime is 8:00. She'll fight you, trust me, she will. When she does, just count down from three. She falls for it every time."

"What happens when I hit zero?" Remus asked.

"That never happened but just in case, tell her no dessert for a week. Food is always her motivator," Andromeda said with a wave of her hand. "She likes to play games with people—she has to be in the proper mood to be able to play board games. If she isn't, she gets bored very easily."

Remus was the one to absorb everything Andromeda was aging whilst the other three were silently sipping their oolong tea. He was an attentive listener, nodding at all the appropriate times and asking logical questions that Andromeda was only too happy to answer.

After a brief ten minute go-through of the list, Ted Tonks came running down the stairs, looking eager and anxious at the same time.

"Enjoy your rest and relaxation," Remus said kindly.

"Listen, Remus. We really do appreciate you doing this for us. Please, let us pay you."

"There really is no need," Remus said and shook his head firmly. "Now go and enjoy the rest of your impromptu vacation."

Andromeda waved goodbye, took Ted's hand, and apparated on the spot with their luggage in their hands. Once the door closed, Remus sat back down at the Tonks's island table. He pushed in his chair a little closer and fell right back asleep. In reality, mornings started at least at 5:30 AM. 5:15 was honestly pushing it. 5:00, he should still be asleep.

Nymphadora was an early riser, full of energy and bouncing about the room with her hair vivid pink today, falling past her shoulders and down to the small of her back. The energetic (now) four year old was talking nonstop, allowing her hair to change color according to her mood.

Remus was barely awake at 5:15. He put on a brave face for Andromeda but other than that, he was exhausted and mentally dying.

"Someone play catch with me!" Nymphadora insisted, stamping her little foot.

"Padfoot, go play catch!" James groaned, kicking the Black heir.

"You go," Sirius protested weakly, still half asleep.

"You're the dog," James whispered, yawning afterward.

Sirius elbowed him roughly until Remus gave in with a loud groan and a glare to his friends.

"Fine," he hissed. "I'll do it since no one else is pulling their own weight!"

Playing with Nymphadora did keep Remus awake and even helped him get more energized. They were tossing an ordinary ball about the large room, serving underhand and watching as Nymphadora squealed with excitement whenever she caught it.

"Did you see that?" she demanded after she caught.

"You're a pro," Remus said, grinning. "You've got real talent."

"And so do you," Sirius said, motioning to Remus. "Everything you said about her applies to you."

Remus muttered his thanks and tried to brush it off with a bit of awkward laughing, but he was too busy throwing the ball to pay much attention.

It was about 5:30 now and Nymphadora paused their game to watch the sunrise.

"I want to see!" she cried, scooting a chair over. "Let me see."

Remus grabbed her as firmly yet gently as he could round her waist and hoisted her up onto the second floor deck's railing, keeping a firm her.

"Better than standing on a chair?" Remus asked, looking sideways to look at her.

"Better than a chair. But it's cold," Nymphadora said, curling in on herself.

Easy solution to an easy problem. Remus took off his duffle coat and wrapped in securely around little Nymphadora's shoulders to keep her warm. She instantly smiled and stopped shivering as bad…..unfortunately, that meant Remus was the one shaking from the cold. He was wearing long sleeves underneath his jacket but the cold was hitting his skin either way but she insisted on watching the sun rise.

Perhaps the cold was worth it because the sunrise was breathtakingly beautiful. Truly impressed, Remus almost forgot about the cold—almost. Although, Remus felt hands slide around his shoulders as a pea coat draped over his shoulders.

"Thanks, Prongs," Remus gasped. "Thanks."

He wrapped himself deeper into the fabric, enjoying the warmth it offered him.

"We wouldn't want you getting sick," Sirius said from the doorway.

"Oh, how nice of you to care," Remus quipped.

"We always do," James said in a singsong voice. "You just never acknowledge it."

"Wow, Moony, of course we meant it. Every time we compliment you, we mean it," James said, reeling back. "Do you think we feign our appreciation?"

"It's just weird when you sound genuine," Remus admitted, making the bespectacled boy reel back a little farther. "You can't blame me."

"Just accept it," James said with a grin.

Nymphadora watched the two friends stare at each other before Remus broke off and burst into laughter. James, unable to hold a straight face, tried fighting off the grin until he couldn't contain his laughter. The coldness seemed to have been forgotten as the two friends continued to talk. Eventually, Sirius and Peter came trekking out of the house with their Hogwarts robes wrapped tight around their sleepwear. "It's so ruddy cold," Sirius mumbled sulkily.

"Wearing shoes might help," Remus said without looking down. He just had the hunch Sirius came out with no shoes.

"Bugger," Sirius said to himself, wiggling his toes. "I can hardly feel them now!"

James and Remus were the only ones dressed for the day. Remus was wearing a gray sweater vest—much like his uniform—over a white buttoned down shirt. He never wore jeans, only slacks. James, on the other hand, loved wearing muggle flannels over plain shirts. And unlike Remus, he loved wearing tight-fitting jeans of all colors, which he often borrowed from Sirius.

"I'm going to make breakfast," Remus said and checked his watch. "Nymphadora, are you hungry?"

Nymphadora nodded eagerly and Remus set her back in the ground and herded her back inside whilst his friends slunk behind her.

"Show a bit of enthusiasm," Remus chided. "You look like an imbecile."

"Maybe I am, prat," Sirius muttered but straightened up. "I hope they have tea with ridiculously amounts of caffeine."

"I'm sure they will," Remus said.

It turned out Andromeda did not have any tea, just having run out just recently. They had an empty box of Chinese Oolong Tea, a tea Remus absolutely loved and was very high in caffeine.

"Andromeda said there was a food store a few blocks down," Remus said, looking at the list. "We could go there and get some tea."

"Correction, none of us have any muggle money," Sirius complained, tugging his robes closer to him.

"Andromeda does," Remus said and held out the twenty-pound note in his hand. "I'll just pay her back in our currency. The better question is….who is willing to go to the store with me?"

"Three blocks is so far!" James whined but stood up anyway. "It's because quite frankly, my beautiful Moony, I love you."

The others laughed but none squealed as loud as Nymphadora, who was positively howling with uncontrollable laughter. So, without further ado, the pair started hovering towards the frot door; Remus began contemplating his choices.

"Please be responsible. Don't let her get hurt," Remus said as James shunted him out the front door. "Be careful!"

James slammed the front door shut on Remus before he could say anything else.

"Wow," Remus said, huffing. "Point taken, no taking my time."

"You've got that right!" James quipped.

The two of them basically ran the entire way there, hoping their fingers haven't frozen off. When the warm air gushed in discrepancy with the icy wind, Remus and James thawed inside the store. It was a pert little place to go shopping for food.

In the aisles of drinks, they had pop, water, milk, and a wide source of tea. The tea came in all kinds of variety. It had taken them a solid five minutes trying to find the same kind of tea.

James, then, caught sight of what they needed and seized a box. "That's it," Remus said impressed.

"That's right," James said smugly. "I know things."

Remus scoffed and rolled his eyes, pushing his friend down the aisle while trying not to look like a complete outsider. Both boys were not dressed in some strange way but the way James was oggling at everything that wasn't food seemed a little odd to the public eye, which was why people would give them sort of an odd glance as they walked past.

"Stop admiring the money box—stop standing right behind that cashier person!" Remus said, hoping he got the name right at least.

"But how does it work?" James asked, looking far too curious for his own good. "We have to get in her line! I have to see this!"

When they made their purchase, it was much less expensive than what they had and Remus did not quite know that. He was about to leave but the cashier shoved eighteen pounds back at him, which caught him by surprise and he blurted out:

"What's this?"

The cashier gave him a very peculiar look and James shook his head and seized Remus's wrist while clutching the tea box and marched out of the store before things went from bad to worse.

Remus and James practically ran back, stopping only when the hill caught their breath. The icy winds began to pick up but the sun was glaring down, blinding them for the snow was reflecting the light against their eyes.

Remus fumbled with the key in the cold but managed to unlock the door. Upon pushing it open with his shoulder, he looked around to see the damage. He could not see anyone; James slid past him and moved through the foyer and to the back of the house where the kitchen lay.

The silence indicated no one was home.

"I am going to murder them all," Remus muttered under his breath.

He strode past the kitchen and turned a left into the Great Room. It was a cozy room, tall and large enough to find a decent-sized sculptor in the middle of it. He looked around, walking slowly as he slowly pulled off his jacket. Just as he moved towards the couch, he could hear someone shushing someone else.

Remus rolled his eyes and jumped onto the couch, looking behind it. There, Sirius, Peter, and Nymphadora all hid. Sirius had just been trying to quiet down Peter, who was scrunched between the wall and Nymphadora.

"What are you doing?" he asked impatiently. "Get out of there."

The tone in Remus's voice meant he was in no mood for their games. Nymphadora seemed unfazed over Remus's exasperation.

"Look, Andromeda mentioned a park, which is Nymphadora's favorite place. Are you willing to head on over there?"

"In this weather, are you mad?" Sirius snorted, stretching out his long limbs. "Absolutely not."

When everyone disagreed to go, Nymphadora stepped in and voiced her own opinion. She shouted, as loud as she could, at the boys.

"I WANT TO GO!"

At thus The Marauders and Nymphadora bundled up and headed on over to the park. The park, per say, was not a far walk but in the cold, it felt like a two mile trek up nothing but a hill. The wind bit at their faces mercilessly all the while Nymphadora was the warmest of them all.

She had a proper winter jacket with a hat, mittens, and a scarf. The Marauders had their pea coats on with their collars flared up to protect their faces, which really only covered their mouths.

"This is your fault, if I get frostbite, I'm pointing my fingers at you," James muttered.

"If you were to get frostbite, it would probably start in your fingers, thus making it much more difficult to point the blame on me," Remus said hotly.

"Prat," James muttered.

"I heard that."

"Good."

The Marauders watched as the kid played in the snow, rolling around and ducking and even trying to swim through it. There was a particularly large snowbank piled high with snow. Nymphadora found that a perfect place to play; she would skid and roll down it.

She was having so much fun while The Marauders were turning into human icicles.

"I am so cold," Sirius muttered.

"Hear, hear," Peter groaned.

"Can we go back?" Sirius asked, nudging Remus.

"FINE."

Remus had long given up on his friends and it was sad to watch Nymphadora's metaphorical tail droop when she was told they had to go home. Remus promised her a nice cup of warm hot chocolate. Only then did she perk right back up and hop back on the sidewalk, half running half walking on the way back.

When they finally unraveled themselves from their winter garments, The Marauders quickly made themselves warm drinks and food and for Nymphadora and sat down to rest.

However, that was not on the agenda for Nymphadora. She had other ideas in mind and wanted to play, having endless energy, she was not quite as tired as the boys.

She tugged on Remus's sleeve, poked James's glasses, pulled on Peter's hair, and untied Sirius's shoelaces. The Marauders were busy trying to find ways to entertain the kid that did not involve any kind of extreme physical movement.

It was not until 3:00 in the afternoon did they finally get her to nap.

.oOo.

"Stop."

"Stop what?"

"Stop all this."

"All of what?"

"Complimenting me," Remus said, scowling heavily. "It's weird when you do that and mean it."

"We always compliment you and mean it," James insisted, smirking. "You're blushing."

"Bugger off."

"Just accept them," James said and sloppily kissed him on the cheek, but missing whilst leaning in and smacked Remus right on the jawline with his lips. "You're amazing either way."

Remus laughed, more at ease this time, and shoved James away. "Nymphadora does not want to see you kissing me."

"I'm sure she does," James cooed.

Nymphadora laughed, changing her hair from a deep violet to a bright pink. Her hair length never shortened past her shoulders but it frequently changed colors according to her mood.

"Andromeda said after dinner we can give Nymphadora dessert, entertain her for the next hour, then put her to bed," Peter said, reading off the list.

Sirius, who still had no shirt on, stretched so everyone could count every one of his ribs.

"One, two, three, four," Nymphadora said, poking each one as she counted.

If it were anyone else, Sirius would have resumed the normal position and shoved them away but the girl seemed to fascinated with the human anatomy, so Sirius stayed in his position, allowing the kid to fulfill her ambition to be a doctor.

After deeming Sirius unhealthy and far too skinny, she rushed over, grabbed a brownie square already made by Andromeda and presented it to him.

"Thanks," Sirius said and accepted it.

The Marauders cut everyone a piece of brownie and scooped out some vanilla ice cream as the brownie's complement.

Dessert was just as enjoyable as dinner. Nymphadora seemed to be losing steam for she grew quieter, listening more instead of talking. She crawled into Sirius's lap and curled against him, closing her eyes.

"I think we can skip the entertaining, eh?" James said, combing his slender fingers through the girl's hair. "She's practically asleep on your lap."

Sirius chuckled fondly but not at Nymphadora—James looked just as beat up and worn down as Sirius was and certainly felt. The weariness was evident in James's eyes.

Sirius hurried upstairs with his cousin in his arms and put her to bed, shutting the lights off and closed the door halfway. He kept the hallway light on but dimmed it so not to disturb her slumber.

Once he slunk back down, he collapsed on the couch along with his other friends and closed his eyes, feeling absolutely exhausted. The Marauders were enjoying the peaceful silence, letting their bodies rest after an entire day of being on their feet.

They watched Nymphadora for more than thirty-two hours that day all so Andromeda and Ted could have a romantic day of rest and relaxation.

By 9:00, they were out.

The first one to wake was Peter. He accidentally scared himself awake when he heard footsteps on the porch. He relaxed when he realized it was Andromeda and Ted coming home. Relieved, he woke up the rest of the party and the four of them clambered to the foyer to greet the two.

"Oi," Andromeda said as soon as she caught sight of her favorite cousin. "Where is your shirt?"

"I've grown accustomed to not wearing it," Sirius quipped. "Your kid threw fire-ice at us, burned my back, and bruised my knees."

Indeed, Andromeda caught sight of the battle wounds and instantly melted back in a sympathetic voice.

"She can be a handful," Andromeda said with an agreeing nod. "Speaking of my daughter—"

"—that sounds so weird when you say it like that," Sirius whined.

"Where is she?" Andromeda finished.

"Asleep," James answered.

"Well….thank you," Andromeda said, turning to face the boys. "Thank you all so much."

"Anything to help a happy family member," Sirius said and beamed. "I love you."

Andromeda cooed loudly and gushed about how much she loved him. She stood on her toes and smacked on a kiss on his cheek. He waved goodbye to Ted, hugged Andromeda once again, and migrated with his three friends to the Floo with his shirt balled up in his hands.

Sirius's eyes surprisingly filled with subtle tears as he watched Ted clasp hands with Andromeda, who was waiting expectedly for Sirius to go.

"Hogwarts school!"

He threw down the flame and watched his friends and family (his real family) whisk away as he was.

.oOo.

"You all right?" Remus asked.

The Marauders were right back in their dormitories, enjoying the tranquility and privacy of the room. Over the holiday break, Frank Longbottom was home until New Year's Eve. The entire Gryffindor house decided it would be a splendid idea to throw a New Year's Eve party so all the Gryffindors were coming back for that.

"Yeah," Sirius said truthfully.

Remus knew Sirius's lying voice and he knew Sirius's genuine voice. He was speaking the truth this time and Remus knew it.

"Good," the werewolf said.

"How are you, Moony old friend?" the dog asked.

"Very well," Remus said contently.

Sirius laughed whilst Remus tucked himself underneath his blankets.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Remus said, drawing the curtains around his bed.

"Definitely," Sirius hummed.

Remus performed a soundproof spell and fell asleep, able to do so peacefully.

* * *

 **Can you imagine? The Marauders babysitting? What a nightmare. Just wait until they have to babysit Harry!**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: I love how you review for every chapter, that means a lot. I can't wait for you to update your story.**

 **Raven that flies at night: That is exactly what I love to hear. Your comments make my day, so thank you. I am glad we have come across one another on this site.**

 **xXFadingNightXx: I will keep saying how cool it is that you play the piano and how you find yourself so involved in it.**

 **Madison Futch: I am so glad you enjoyed reading this. Hopefully you'll be writing your own so I can review yours!**

 **Fruitstickers: Thanks so much for your comments; again, I hope you get an account so you can post your own stories and I can faithfully review yours!**


	22. XXII: Eve of a New Year

**All rights remain.  
I seriously can't wait for you to read this one!**

This year, everyone in Gryffindor was back before the holiday; Fabian, Gideon, Marcus, and Emmanuel, who all graduated in the last two years, put on a New Year's Eve party in the Gryffindor Common Room. When word of said party caught the biggest gossipers of Hogwarts, everyone was coming back for the gathering. James insisted he would not miss it for the world for he truly missed them.

So, naturally, everyone was gathered in the Common Room, excitement buzzing in the air as they all waited for the returning Gryffindor members. Marcus, the overbearing Quidditch Captain, Fabian and Gideon, the pranksters, and Emmanuel, the legendary Chaser, were all returning for the same reason: they missed Hogwarts. Having been sent out into the world with a war drawing nearer, they wanted some sanctuary, some familiarity, which they could find at Hogwarts.

The party was a casual wear, so The Marauders all dressed themselves in long sleeved button downs, loose hanging ties, and tight jeans (all except Remus, who preferred slacks) and were waiting downstairs with everyone else. The food was already set up on the table, the music was playing loudly, and people were already helping themselves to the drinks.

"Firewhiskey," Sirius said in a singsong voice and hurried over to the table. "There's so much!"

Remus shoved Sirius over to get a look for himself. As a Prefect, he definitely knew he should not be encouraging this but his friends were already helping themselves. Giving up, Remus sighed and moved away from the table to join his friends. He already accepted he was the worst Prefect a long while ago.

"I'm seriously surprised you aren't yelling at them," Peter said, not taking the bottles from his friends. "I would have thought you'd be yelling by now."

Remus flushed with guilt and shot a glare at Peter, who threw his hands up. Remus, who did not accept a bottle himself, merely stood beside his friends. Their livers would surely give out by the time they were thirty if they kept up at the pace they were going. Remus sighed and continued to push away the bottles Sirius and James would pester him with.

"I'm just as surprised," Remus muttered, castigating himself for defacing the Prefect Badge.

"Oh!" James exclaimed, nearly spilling his drink. "There she is!"

James practically screeched in Remus's ear, which made him wince and shove James away rather roughly.

"Who, prat?" Sirius asked.

"Evans!"

At the sound of her name, Sirius's expression darkened and he took another long sip from his bottle, biting his lip. Remus nudged Sirius with his foot and shook his head ever so subtly as he opened his mouth to say something. Sirius clamped his mouth shut and huffed, still glaring daggers in Lily's direction.

"GUESS WHO ARRIVED?"

The question was answered with a large roar erupting from the crowd. The Marauders whipped around to see Marcus, Fabian, Gideon, and Emmanuel arrived. James started the cheer and ran up to Marcus and Emmanuel, embracing them both and effectively hitting Marcus in the head with the bottle.

"James!" Marcus roared and hugged his favorite Seeker back. "How is Bernard keeping up with the team?"

"He's great," James said, taking a step back. "You look exactly like you did in your seventh year."

"And you're still the same," Marcus said.

Sirius came running forward, catching them all into a hug. They welcomed back their Beater with graciousness. The rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team came racing up to welcome them back.

Remus and Peter strode over Fabian and Gideon, who were surrounded by others, and hugged them in a friendly greeting.

"How are you two holding up?" Remus asked, looking at them up and down. "You look pretty well off."

"We're working for the Ministry. We're interning still so we aren't fixed in one department," Fabian answered.

"But we're loving it so far," Gideon answered.

Remus raised his eyebrows in surprise, not expecting the two most boisterous people he knew working in the office.

"Congratulations," Peter said, though aiming his approbation at Fabian, who was the most worried about his future. "I knew you'd go far."

"I can't believe you're back," Remus said, running a hand through his hair. "It's been a while. I thought Hogwarts would be history for you two."

"Never," Fabian reassured. "Hogwarts Is our history but in a good way."

"Absolutely," Gideon chimed in and pushed his brother out of his way to whisper something to Remus. "Once we have enough money we want to start our own business."

Gideon was a few inches shorter than Remus, who had sprouted up to be very tall, so Peter was able to see his lips as he spoke and understand what he said. Remus's eyebrows shot upward once again as he took a step back to look at the other.

"Are you serious?" Remus asked.

"No, I am."

Remus heaved a sigh, knowing just who came forward.

"That joke is old, Padfoot," Remus said wearily. He turned back to Gideon. "What kind of business are you talking about?"

But before he could answer, Marcus raised his glass to the air and raised the volume of the offending music. Remus rolled his eyes but did not chide. A few Gryffindors pushed the couch back and the furniture to create a dance floor.

Frank Longbottom and Mary Macdonald bewitched the lights with a simple charm mixed with a muttered " _periculum_ " which resulted in something rather impressive. Dorcas Meadowes and Lily Evans were standing together talking with cups of marmalade in their hands.

Remus excused himself and moved over to talk to the two girls, greeting Dorcas first to lower the suspicion. He could feel someone watching him but he felt comfortable in his own House, so he ignored it. Lily beamed and started talking to him avidly, waving her arms for emphasis.

"Look at Potter, getting wasted out there. . .chatting it up with other girls," Lily muttered.

Remus followed her gaze and frowned when he saw James with yet another bottle of firewhiskey, chatting with Mary Macdonald, who was evidently falling for his hazel eyes.

"He is such a womanizer," Lily hissed angrily.

"Why does it matter?" Remus said without thinking. "You don't fancy him so why does it matter who he flirts with?"

"It doesn't, Remus!" Lily insisted, catching on before Remus did.

"Oh," he said hurriedly. "No, I didn't mean it like that."

Lily laughed, all tension falling from her shoulders. Remus looked at her with a fervor of warmth and watched her as she played with her hair, her eyes never quite leaving James Potter but the expression of deep hatred never quite left her eyes.

"Do you want to dance?" Lily asked.

"Er. . ."

Remus was really against dancing for he knew he was no good at it but the look Lily was giving him made it very hard for him to say no. So, in the end, he ended up nodding, making Lily beam.

She dragged him to the makeshift dance floor and started twirling around him. Frank, Alice, and Fabian joined Remus and Lily at the dancefloor and started to jump and down with them.

Frank's face was flushed red with the amount of alcohol he consumed but Alice's face was bright pink from it, too. Fabian, who was able to hold his drinks a little better was not as effected by it as the others.

Alcohol seemed to make them dance with more audacity for Remus knew Frank would never dance this exotically if he were not under the influence. He watched as Longbottom seductively pulled Alice towards him before spinning her away.

Remus felt his face grow warm and stopped jumping around, claiming he was merely tired. Lily caught the look in his eyes and pulled his arm gently, telling him to follow her. Remus obliged, excusing himself from the dancing group and followed Lily off to the side.

With one last look over his shoulder, he saw Alice and Frank dancing with their foreheads touching and their eyes closed blissfully. The werewolf bit his lip and heaved a heavy sigh, not wanting to go through this tonight.

"You're better off here," Lily said and pulled him closer. "Why don't you rest, I'll get us both something to drink."

"If you want," Remus said and watched her flash him a smile before moving away.

Remus watched the rest of the party carry on with little to no trouble.

He saw James and Peter standing together, talking with Fabian and Emmeline Vance. She was laughing heartily, throwing her head back as she laughed along with whatever they were talking about, bottle hanging loosely in her slender fingers. She put a hand on James's shoulder and pushed him down on his knees, pouring the firewhiskey in his mouth as he kneeled before her. Although, most of the alcohol ended up on his face and shirt rather than his mouth.

Remus rolled his eyes and looked elsewhere. Then his eyes fell on Sirius.

Ever since he left Sirius's side to converse with Lily, he lost track of the Black heir and not seen him since. But once he did, he knew what Sirius would be doing.

The Animagus had a girl pinned flush against the wall, pushing her against it as he snogged the life out of her. Her slender hands wove deep into his perfect hair and she sank a little as Sirius towered over her.

Pulling a face, Remus looked away a bit disturbed but alarmingly getting used to it. Lily came back with a cup of marmalade in her hands, one for her and one for him. She caught sight of Remus's expression and sighed.

"Mature, aren't they?" she asked rhetorically.

Remus hummed in the back of his throat, cherishing the moments he got with Lily without having James jump down his throat.

Remus's eyes went back to Sirius, only to find the girl talking with someone else and Sirius with another girl. This time, it was Mary Macdonald, Remus could see her nodding enthusiastically at something his mate was saying. The werewolf pursed his lips and watched as Sirius grinned lopsidedly and started snogging _her._ Remus knew better than to yell at Sirius because it ended up in a horrible fight the last time he tried. He only hoped Sirius would wise up.

"Are you all right?" Lily asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," Remus reassured gently.

His eyes landed back on Alice and Frank, who were snogging but much more modestly than Mary and Sirius were. It still stung to see them together but Remus had gotten so used to pushing it down and away, he was a pro at it. But it was the way Frank and Alice were looking at one another, it was like they were a match made in Heaven, something Remus would never get.

Remus felt his old friend, Jealousy spring up his chest and claw its way up his throat. He had a harder time occluding it and the longer he watched, the worse he felt. It would have made sense for him to look away but Remus found that he could not tear his gaze away.

"So," Lily said, breaking the silence. "How are you enjoying the party?"

Remus looked at Lily.

She wore a simple shirt with black jeans; her hair hanging around her face, framing the delicacy of it. Her flaming hair fell perfectly past her shoulders, making her look much too regal and elegant. Her green irises seared his blue but he was able to bear the burns but her lips quirked into a smile, a perfect smile, mind you.

"I'm enjoying it," Remus said truthfully. "And you?"

"Definitely nice to see everyone getting along," Lily said and nodded.

"I am surprised you're not yelling at everyone for underage drinking," Remus said truthfully.

"No, I bewitched the alcohol for anyone under their fifth year to turn into water when touched," Lily said. "Transfiguration 101, you gave me that book, remember?"

"How could I forget?" Remus said with a chuckle.

The music continued to play loudly, blaring in Remus's ear. His sleeves were rolled up and his tie loosened. It was only about three hour into the party but James and Sirius made it look like they were up all night. Their behavior was atrocious but what was Remus going to do about it?

It was not exactly soothing but it was nice to feel the pressures of everything alleviate from his shoulders for once. The war could not breach Hogwarts, it could not disturb their party, it could not destroy this memory Remus now had of his House standing together. He could not feel the effects of the moon any longer now that he was falling into mode of relaxation.

Of course. . .the peace must come to an end. It would only make too much sense for people to not embarrass themselves on a wild night like tonight. Unfortunately, it was James this time.

Lily watched with disdain as James hollered at the top of his lungs:

"Lily Evans, I love you! I'd give any girl my heart but you have mine! Take me and I'll be yours!"

"Shut up, Potter!"

"Snog me," James shouted back.

Remus groaned and slapped a hand over his face as Lily turned red with embarrassment and anger. She growled deep in her throat as James came over to her.

Lily went from stiff to absolutely frozen. She did not lift her eyes, move her head, or any part of her being at all. She kept James locked in her gaze as she glared daggers at him. Any bloke would have the sense to run but James's impaired judgment was only telling him to move closer.

"Prongs," Remus began but he was interrupted with the most disturbing sight (even if it looked like they were made to be).

"Potter, get out of my face—"

Lily looked outraged but her words were smothered when James crashed his lips against hers and held her flush against his own warm body.

Every pair of eyes were on him and every jaw in the room dropped to the ground. Remus, who was standing the closest, caught sight of Lily's expression. He swore on his life for the tiniest minute, he saw Lily's eyes close in bliss and almost saw her start to snog him back.

But that second ended.

Lily shoved James roughly with angry tears sparking her eyes. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand pointedly, baring her teeth at him.

" _How dare you, Potter?_ " Lily snarled, a tear falling from her eye.

James merely stood there, finally understand just what he had done. Remus kept his mouth clamped shut, unable to say anything and not wanting to anyway. James flushed red and stumbled over his words.

"I hate you!" Lily screeched.

Usually it took paragraphs of insults and words of hatred to send James away from the love of his life but the one sentence had James slinking away without a word. Lily was steaming at the ears and if looks could kill, everyone would be dead but James would be worse than dead (yes, that is possible).

She stalked past Remus and towards Mary Macdonald. She whispered something fiercely, in which Mary nodded. Remus could not catch what they were saying nor did he have the time to send out a sonic ear to catch the conversation.

"Remus!" Lily bellowed.

Remus jumped at being addressed but Lily was already storming back over to him. Remus bit his lip as she seized him by the tie and yanked him out into the corridors. Remus wanted to point out that they were not supposed to linger in the halls but she looked like she was ready to blow the roofs off Hogwarts.

"I hate him," she whispered, curling her lip back in disgust. "How dare he kiss me?"

"I dunno what happened there, Lily," Remus said unsure.

She just stood there with her hands on her hips as Remus shifted his weight from foot to foot, shuffling them awkwardly.

"Oi," Lily said and looked at him. "Oi, Remus."

"What?" Remus asked.

"I want you to kiss me."

Now Remus was more than confused. He furrowed his eyebrows together and took an awkward step back.

"We said we wouldn't do that anymore," Remus said, looking troubled.

Lily stamped her foot and checked her wristwatch. She sighed and flung her beautiful hair over her shoulder, looking impatient.

"Remus—"

"Lily—"

"Remus, _please_!"

"Why?" Remus pressed, narrowing his eyes at her. "Why do you want me to?"

"I just need to get my mind off what just happened," Lily said, shaking her head. "As a friend?"

Remus carded his fingers through his hair, taking a step forward, looking directly at the girl in front of him. His heart pumped faster but it felt like time had purposely slowed down. Lily watched him expectantly, letting her soft breath billow about them.

"I shouldn't," Remus breathed, aware of how close he was.

"Please," Lily whispered in one last ditch effort.

Just as the portrait hole opened, Remus leaned forward and Lily jumped into his arms, capturing the werewolf's lips in a very tangled kiss. She wove her hands in Remus's sandy hair, pushing them together even closer. Remus felt his heart pounding, guilt crushing every organ in his body.

Then she pointedly moaned in his mouth.

Remus frowned in the kiss and pulled away, figuring something was very wrong. When they broke apart, Lily looked flushed red with guilt. Now Remus was extremely confused.

"You—"

The voice broke off and Remus whipped around. What he saw made him want to hurl.

James Potter and Sirius Black were standing in the portrait hole with Mary Macdonald and Peter Pettigrew in the back.

Remus took one look at his friends then back at Lily then back to James. With one disgusted grunt, he shoved Lily away, pushing himself away from the girl as far as he could.

A look of hurt flashed in her eyes but Remus's blood was pounding and anger was taking over his entire being.

"You," Remus spat at her. "You used me!"

Lily knit her eyebrows but she did not say anything, which seemed to frustrate Remus even more.

"You just stay away from me, Evans!" Remus snarled, curling his lip back.

"Remus," she said, hurt.

"Don't talk to me," he said roughly.

Mary came over and pulled Lily with her, taking her close to her side and away from Remus, who was seething. Remus watched Lily burst into tears, crying into Mary's arms as her friend held her there, tears sparking in her own eyes.

James was oddly silent during the entire fiasco, expression betraying nothing. Remus felt like crawling under a rock and dying. However, Sirius was not quite as quiet as James, not afraid to take out his anger on the werewolf before him.

"I hate you, Remus," Sirius said with venom Remus only heard directed towards his family. "I hate you."

Remus felt his heart shatter at the sight of his friend.

"I told you," Sirius said loudly, spreading his arms out wide. "Remus was never one of us. We should have never stuck with you."

James did not jump to Remus's defense, he did not calm his friend down; he did nothing but stare at Remus, expressionless. Remus suddenly felt like his tie was choking him, killing him, suffocating him. He shook his head, looking at his friends, unable to look away.

"I hate you."

Sirius did not speak but James; James had spoken this time, telling Remus that he hated him, declaring it official.

"I wish I never met you," James said but his voice was not filled with venom but hurt. Hurt Remus could not even explain.

"I wish I never met me, too," Remus whispered.

Sirius came storming down to Remus and before anyone could do anything, Sirius punched Remus once and punched him hard, right in the face. Remus fell down, clutching his bleeding nose.

Dimly, Remus could hear the girls screaming but he was dulled to the senses of the world, unable to focus on anything but the Black heir in front of him, who used to be his friend. Now, Sirius looked more like a stranger than anything and Remus was, for the first time in his life, afraid of Sirius.

"Stay away from us," Sirius bellowed.

Remus leaped to his feet, fearful of Sirius's feet, which were coming closer to his face. Afraid he was going to get punched again, Remus held up his hands in front of his face.

"You coward!" Sirius howled, punching him again regardless of Remus's hands.

Remus felt Sirius's fist collide with his eye socket, feeling it bruise instantly.

"You bloody coward!" Sirius shouted, still advancing. "Get out of my face! Get away from me!"

James did nothing to stop his friend, only watching as Remus got beat up by his once former friend. The music that was flowing from the Common Room and into the halls, blared loudly in Remus's ears and he staggered away from his livid. . . friend.

"I'm gone," Remus cried. "Please!"

James and Sirius were both crying but for all different reasons. Remus twisted himself away from Sirius, trying to run.

"I'm gone!" Remus sobbed, now feeling the tears cascade from his eyes. "I'm gone!"

With that, he raced down the halls. The fifth year did not look back until he put a good three floors between him and Sirius and James. His eye was burning and his nose was still bleeding but his heart hurt the most.

He wanted to tear it out of him, he willed for it to stop working. He screamed inwardly, chiding himself for falling into something so deep and dark he no longer could see. Blinded by a flood of emotions, Remus continued to run down the empty corridors, sobbing and staggering.

Remus's world had ended so why was he still breathing? His friends hated him, he turned on Lily and pushed her away, what else did he have now? Surely someone would come up and help him break through the surface, preventing him from drowning in his own self-hatred.

However, no one was there. He had isolated himself and he had taken everything that he had come to know so well. Remus staggered to a stop; his feet had taken him to the Hospital Wing.

Without really bothering to knock, he burst through the double doors, startling, not Madam Pomfrey, but Professor McGonagall.

"Lupin!" she said, astonished. "What has happened?"

Remus could not control his tears as they slipped from his eyes. He had no words to describe what had just occurred. He could not form the sentences so he stuck to shaking his head, covering his face with his hands.

Professor McGonagall steered him to his bed and Remus continued to sob into his hands, wishing his heart would give out. Then, he would not have to endure the emotional agony of losing everything all over again.

Professor McGonagall rushed out of the room, calling for Madam Pomfrey, who was brewing in her back office. Madam Pomfrey came running out once she heard Professor McGonagall.

"Lupin!" Madam Pomfrey exclaimed. "What's going on?"

Remus mutely shook his head, able to stifle his sobs. He looked down at his violently shaking hands but refused to talk.

The three of them stood in silence for the next ten minutes, trying to figure out what exactly to do. Remus was in a state of silence, something he did when he was very upset.

But what Remus really wanted was to be alone, it was unwise of him to allow himself to come to the Hospital Wing when he knew they would all badger him.

In the span of twenty minutes, his life went from decent to a true Hell. Remus bit his lip, unsure of whether he had the capability of crying anymore. For fractions of seconds, he felt almost better for some unexplainable reason until his quisling mind told him why he was in the Hospital Wing in the first place and his broken spirit would show through once more.

They sat in silence for another five minutes before it was interrupted.

"What do you need, Lupin?" Professor McGonagall asked, worried.

"A new heart," Remus said lifelessly. "Mine is broken."

* * *

Sirius moved closer to James, who was curled in on himself on the couch. The party had ceased when they heard about The Marauders' fight. James had not said a word ever since he caught Remus and Lily.

Sirius, surprisingly, had not said a word either. He merely sat there, consoling his broken friend, wrapping his arms around James's shoulder and whispering comforting words into James's ear.

"Sirius?" Peter asked tentatively, almost as if he was afraid. "A word with you, please?"

Sirius looked like he wanted to argue but then he stood, letting go of James to move over to Peter, who looked disgruntled.

"What?" Sirius asked.

"I'm afraid," Peter stated calmly.

"Of what?" Sirius asked impatiently.

"Of you."

The answer was not expected and Sirius faltered, his cold demeanor slipped when Peter answered, and he knit his eyebrows in confusion.

"Why?"

"You hit him," Peter said, looking at his feet. "You hit him out of cold anger, Sirius. How can I not be afraid of you?"

Sirius frowned deeply, growing angry.

"Then go away, Peter," Sirius said and waved him off. "You were no help anyway. You never are."

That stung Peter more than he would have liked to admit but he obeyed to Sirius's wishes, walking away with a scowl forming on his face. Peter disappeared out of the Common Room, leaving a hurt James and an angry and shocked Sirius.

Sirius shook himself out of his haze and went back to James, hugging him tightly to his chest, cursing the day Evans was born. How he hated that girl for breaking his best mate's heart. He wished Evans would somehow drop out of Hogwarts and go somewhere else.

James sniffled, mopping up his eyes on his sleeve, only to burst into a new wave of fresh tears. Sirius hummed, allowing the noise to be the only noise in the room. The party had broken up as soon as Sirius, Lily, Peter, Mary, and James came walking back in and without Remus. They looked awkward and evacuated the Common Room, leaving it completely empty.

There were cups strewn about the room, plates of food lay around, and the ghosts of the high spirits people were just in. Now the room seemed desolate and depressing, swallowing anyone in it in a terrible vortex of misery and heartache.

"Love is a tough bastard, Prongs," Sirius mollified quietly. "You just need to learn how to play its game."

James merely buried himself deeper into Sirius's arms, not wanting to talk or answer or do much of anything but sit there. Sirius felt his heart break all over again at the miserable heap who once was full of happiness just an hour ago.

"What's happened to you, Prongs?" Sirius murmured, pushing James's hair out of his eyes. "Since when is your happiness so dependent on girl?"

"Since I met her," James said and started crying again. "I don't know why I love her. She does nothing but rip my heart out over and over again. Every time she insults me, every time she yells at me . . . I wish more and more I wasn't myself."

"I don't want you to be anyone except yourself," Sirius said firmly, taking James's chin and gently tilted his head up. "Promise me you won't be anyone but yourself?"

James merely sat back, wiping his eyes as he cast them downward. Sirius did not press, merely dropping his hand in his lap and staring at them instead of James. The two sat in the Common Room together, embracing the silence like an old friend.

* * *

Lily knew she had made a horrid mistake the moment she asked Remus to snog her. It was selfish of her and she wished she could replay the moment and change it. It was the way Remus looked at her; it was filled with disgust and anger, something she thought she would never see on Remus's expression when talking to her. But it was there, Remus hated her and she knew she deserved it.

Lily sighed, running a hand through her hair. Mary Macdonald was doing her best to keep her spirits high but her eyes were red and raw from crying and her heart was torn and ripped right out her chest.

It only grew worse when she ran into James Potter. The other looked as if he, too, had cried his heart out. However, she was not expected to be greeted by the coldest demeanor from Sirius nor James.

"You have no right," James hissed, standing up in an instant. "All this is your fault."

"I knew you were bad news," Sirius growled, standing beside James. "Just get your pretty little face out of mine."

Lily felt like shouting back but she gave up, having no fire left for the two boys. She did, however, shoot them one of her infamous glares before heading up to her dormitory.

"Just leave me alone," Lily managed to shout before she departed.

When she stepped out and into the halls (whilst breaking school rules, Prefects nowadays!), she walked right into Severus. Perhaps now was not the best timing but she leaped into Severus's arms and latched on to him.

"This night is the worst!" Lily sobbed, breaking down all over again.

"Why, is it Potter again?" Severus asked, growing concerned and increasingly angry. "I swear, if he did something."

"He only kissed me," Lily muttered then clamped her mouth shut.

"He did _what_?" Severus howled, not caring about breaking Lily's eardrums.

"That's right, Snivellus," a voice sneered.

Both Lily and Severus looked up to see James and Sirius standing together, both had their arms folded over their chests and identical glares on their faces. Lily could tell this was going to be bad so she tried to break it down before it could build up.

"Leave," she said to both Severus and the other two. "Please leave!"

Neither James nor Sirius left and Severus merely raised his wand. Seeing Severus with his wand out, James and Sirius pulled out their own and aimed them both at Lily and Severus.

"I don't care who I hit," Sirius admitted, fixing Lily down with a glare. "I promise I don't care."

Lily turned red but pulled out her own wand, pointing them at James and Sirius. This only seemed to anger Sirius for he took a step forward, lowering his wand and raising his fist. Severus took a step forward, curling his lip back but James raced towards Sirius's side, holding up the line.

"This was your fault, Evans," Sirius said and sneered at her. "Now that you're done dumping James you move on to Remus. After you get bored with him, you go to Snivellus."

Lily turned even redder at Sirius's slur but she held her ground, feeling to overwhelmed to say anything.

"How dare you talk to her like that?" Severus spat.

The tension rose as James cast a glance between Severus and Lily. Before anyone could react, James slashed his wand in the air with a flash of light and a bang and knocked Severus's wand out of his hand. The Slytherin had no idea what had hit him but now that he was wandless, he looked a bit less confident. James rushed at Severus and pinned him against the wall.

"Get back to your own Common Room," James hissed right into his ear. "And don't come near me again or you will regret it. I am in no mood for games."

"Try me," Severus snarled and punched James right in the face.

James howled with pain as he moved backward, almost in slow motion, and clutched his nose. With a roar of rage, Sirius advanced forward and tackled Severus to the ground, kicking his legs from underneath.

"Why don't you try me?" Sirius shouted, aiming his wand directly between Severus's eyes.

"No!" Lily cried and shoulder checked Sirius off her friend.

Sirius was shoved off so hard he rolled off Severus and onto the ground twice before managing to stop himself. He twisted around so fast, it was a blur, and he was instantly back on his feet.

"Get back!" Sirius shouted, aiming his wand at Severus.

Severus, realizing it was not worth it, took Lily by the hand and backed away with an ugly scowl on his face. Sirius's chest was heaving as he stood beside James, who was leaning heavily against the wall.

With friends split apart, they all had one question in mind: What will happen now?

* * *

 **This chapter will all lead up to Sirius's prank against Snape.**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: I'm glad your honest if you don't like something. I take criticism well, I promise. I'm also glad to hear you are updating. I can't wait to read the next chapter. Your story has potential and will go far. HAPPY LATE HALLOWEEN!**

 **xXFadingNightXx: Oh my gosh, HAPPY LATE HALLOWEEN! I totally missed saying that on fanfiction.**

 **Raven that flies at night: Poor Sirius, no one really trusts the crazy Black heir, he's a madman. Haha, HAPPY LATE HALLOWEEN!**

 **Just in case you didn't get it before:**

 **HAPPY LATE HALLOWEEN TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!**


	23. XXIII: Here I Am, Where Are You?

**All rights remain.**

Waking up, his agony seemed to have struck him straight in the heart. It was not the physical agony his body had grown used to but it was emotional grief. It was not the grief his heart had grown used to but it was the intensity of losing his friends, seemingly the only reason he bothered getting up in the morning.

Remus sat in the Boathouse, legs dangling off their pier and feet brushing the surface of the water, creating ripples that spread until it had given up everything and disappeared . . . and in his fingers was a half empty bottle of whiskey.

Beside the bottle of whiskey, there were four glasses around Remus, each filled to the middle with the alcohol. His fingers trailed the lip of the goblet, listening to its ring as he sat alone, pondering what he had done wrong.

His knees were drawn up to his chest, crossed at the ankles, and his arms enclosed around his legs. The werewolf's quisling thoughts went back to the previous night; the night after it had all gone down. He blinked away the tears frozen on his face.

 _Remus came up the stairs, taking his time to collect his words. It felt as if he was walking to the gallows; he swallowed his worry and knocked softly on the door. When he swung the door to the dormitory open, his two friends were sitting on their beds, but Peter was not there._

 _"Hello?" Remus said uneasily. "James?"_

 _Neither of them answered and Remus could feel his thoughts cling to James and Sirius, wishing he could take a thousand beatings instead of this._

 _"I'm sorry," he murmured as his eyes traced the vivid red outline of his black shoes. "None of that was supposed to happen."_

 _James raised his head, his eyes mingled with anger and sadness, swelling Remus's heart with wrenching guilt. The other stood up; his stance slumped over, as he could not quite get over the betrayal of his friend._

 _"Get out," James said once but clearly._

 _"James," Remus implored._

 _"Get out," James repeated and crossed his arms over his chest. "Rumors are flying, Remus. I don't want any part of them . . . or you."_

 _"And you're going to believe them?" Remus said, a cry rising in his chest. "Since when do you listen to others?"_

 _James turned his head away, his red-rimmed eyes brimming with tears once more. His lips were pursed, holding back the sob that threatened to break his voice._

 _Remus looked aghast, unable to recognize his friend. Remus was beginning to see just how much Lily meant to James; the pain radiating from his friend was too intense to bear._

 _Sirius remained silent, watching Remus and James unfold their feelings as if they were laying down their cards on a table. Remus continued to take steps forward, Sirius noticed, hands raising as he tried to console his troubled friend._

 _"Stay away from me, Remus!" James exploded, anger now filling his eyes completely. "You monster, just stay away from me, do you hear?"_

 _Sirius rose to his feet, standing beside James and turning to face Remus, who looked more than taken aback._

 _"To blazes with you and your secret," Sirius said, trembling (but he did not know from what). "We don't want you, traitor."_

 _As simple as those words were, Remus could feel the message sink into his heart, tugging at his heartstrings until they breached its breaking point. Remus threw his hands up and walked out, slamming the door behind him._

 _As soon as he hurled down the stairs, he raced through the Common Room, ignoring the questions bombarded at him, and raced out into the halls. He ripped the Prefect Badge off his uniform and chucked it as hard as he could, watching it fly down the number of stairs and fling off the edge._

 _The echoing noise of the metal seemed to be telling Remus something; however, the werewolf had gotten so good at occluding everything around him, pretending it was not there until it disappeared. He raced outside and threw himself down the steep slope, heading straight for the lake._

 _His book bag only seemed to weigh heavier as he ran, dragging him down during his desperate attempt to escape. When he reached the docks, he threw himself down, rolling on his back and clutching his head. He cried himself tired and through the night, Remus cast a warming spell around the Boathouse and slept there for the night._

 _The poor boy had not gone to class the next day, deciding seeing his mates was simply too arduous. Remus merely settled down, listening to whatever he could hear from where he was sitting. He only went back up when he knew no one else would be out._

 _Now, he had been reduced to this._

 _When was it going to be his turn to shine, to step out of the dark and into the glow? When was his endless night going to cease to an end? People have told him there was a place where his heart could be free yet he never felt more trapped than he did right then._

Remus frowned as he stared at the goblets he had taken. Suddenly filled with ephemeral and unexplainable emotions, he roared and kicked the bottle against the wall, watching it spill its contents but not breaking.

He seized the goblet splashing the alcohol against the wall before flinging it as far as he could into the lake, cursing and watching it sink beneath the water. He kicked the second goblet over, shattering it with his foot as he crushed the glass. He yanked his wand out and blasted the third goblet to a thousand shards of glass; with another wave of his wand, the shards picked themselves up and buried themselves into the wall of the Boathouse. With the four goblet, he seized, it draining it in one go, and clung onto it, hugging it close to his chest as he fell into a kneeling position.

* * *

James leaned against the wall, closing his eyes in exhaustion. He did not know why he felt so burned and hurt; perhaps it was the way Remus looked at her and the way she looked back. It was as if the two were simultaneously taking a hammer to his heart, shattering it and laughing as they did so.

"I'm sorry."

Those two words seemed to echo through his thoughts, roiling them to a point where he could no longer keep anything straight anymore. He jumped when someone spoke to him, only to find Peter standing beside him.

"What are you apologizing for?" James asked, looking up at his friend.

"For not standing up to you," Peter said with an impassive expression. "I am sorry for not standing up against you and Sirius."

James frowned, rising to his feet slowly. He honestly felt like punching Peter but he knew his friend would just hit him back. James had learned of Peter's real wrath once and he rather not mention that time again.

"Is that why you came to me?" James inquired, quirking an eyebrow at the other. "If so, leave."

"Don't tell me what to do, Potter," Peter said angrily. "You are not in control of me. This is why everyone liked Remus better than you. This is why Lily Evans likes Remus and not you."

James paled, feeling the blood rush to his head, making it pound a rhythmic beat, drumming in sync with his racing heart. He could feel a well of angry and hurt emotions surging forward, ready to express themselves in the form of terrible words.

"Don't," James hissed through gritted teeth.

"You were never a good friend," Peter stated and squared his shoulders. "That is why I came to you."

James watched in more dejection as Peter turned his back on him and walked away; James's eyes never left his friend until Peter rounded the corner and disappeared out of sight. The empty corridor was silent once more, leaving James alone with his thoughts, the one thing he did not want to be stuck with.

"Fine, leave; you won't disappoint me," James roared after Peter, springing to his feet.

His chest was heaving as a thin trail of tears began to fall from his hazel eyes. He dug the palms of his hands into his eyes, willing himself to pull it together, only to find it more and more difficult.

"I can do that myself," James murmured.

He buried his face in his hands, seizing his book bag as he was still wiping away his tears, and swung it over his shoulder with unnecessary force. He was half-blinded when he was walking, afraid to blink in case he set himself off.

He sniffed and gathered his sleeve in his hand, wiping his eyes again, feeling the redness and rawness around them as his skin stung at the contact of the fabric. He took a shaking breath and set his shoulders back, trying to recompose himself.

Half of him wanted someone to find him like this; perhaps this was a sign for help but what could anyone else do to fix a broken heart . . . and a broken friendship? James covered his mouth with the back of his hand to stifle the gasp hoping to escape from his lips.

With little warning, James slammed right into someone, sending him reeling backward and clutching his hand. His throat was completely dry, hurting awfully when he swallowed. It felt as if he was swallowing razors but he needed his voice to work.

"Potter," Professor McGonagall said, dusting herself off and collecting the books back into her arms. "Do watch where you are going."

James did not want Professor McGonagall to find him in such a state but she was better than no one. He kept his head bent but he muttered his apology. Professor McGonagall noticed her troubled student and peered closer to see if he was all right.

Evidently deciding he was not, Professor McGonagall cleared her throat and pocketed her wand, motioning for James to pay attention to her.

"Potter, I want to see you in my office," she said firmly. "If you would follow me."

James had no intention of arguing. He trailed miserably behind her, deciding things could not really get much worse.

James was familiar with Professor McGonagall's office, having been in it many times before for numerous reasons, many relating back to him and his mates probably pulling off some kind of stunt or prank.

"Professor, don't you think it's a bit unfair to give me detention for running into you?" James muttered as soon as she shut the door with a flick of her wand. "I said I was sorry."

"That, Potter, is not why I called you in here," she said and looked over at him with her strict gaze.

James knew she cared, she was worried, but he could not find it in himself to care. He merely threw himself into her chair, elbows on his knees, and hands in his hair as he bent his head.

"Things are really messed up," James rasped, finding his tears coming back to his eyes.

She remained silent, leaving James to wonder if she really wanted to hear his problems. However, she made no move, only raising an eyebrow as if it was a gesture for him to continue. Throwing all pride out the window, he began his diatribe.

"It's all just gotten worse from then," James said in anguish. "This is really messed up; it blew out of proportion."

"So, are you insinuating all of this is overreacting?" Professor McGonagall asked, sitting back in her own chair.

"No," James said quietly, not meeting her gaze. "I am tired of hurting myself everyday over and over again. I am tired of others hurting me over and over again. This has to stop somehow."

"And you veraciously believe this will hinder whatever problems you have?"

James scowled before averting his gaze back to his shaking hands folded in his lap. Professor McGonagall's scrutinizing gaze seemed to bore right into James, reaching his very soul.

"I dunno," James whispered. "I don't know!"

He closed his eyes and buried deeper into his hands, which were covering his face. He felt like curling up and forgetting everything, sitting down and taking a drink with him so drown his misery. Somehow, he believed it was the only way to appease his pain.

Professor McGonagall could only stare back at him with the same helpless look.

* * *

Peter was sick and tired of his friends always acting out like the way they do when they are particularly upset by something. When he first befriended them, they all seemed like good blokes to be around and perhaps Peter had finally found something he liked. Even to this day, they were still good blokes but they were kind of terrible friends.

He felt terrible for admitting it but he also felt better. He felt as if bricks had lifted from his chest, taking some of the onerous weight off his conscious. His head spun and he found it increasingly difficult to put one foot in front of the other. He could specifically remember the expression James wore as he stormed off after flat out yelling at him.

The guilt was gnawing at him but Peter had to do what needed to be done. He was sick of his mates pushing each other around until one of them cracked, having just about enough. That party was a bad idea, he hated alcohol, especially in the hands of James and Sirius. He distrusted Lily Evans now more than ever. He was in a fix.

"Peter?"

His name startled him out of his haze and he turned to face Frank Longbottom running up to him. Peter lifted an eyebrow, surprised to see his fellow Gryffindor greeting him at all. They did not hate each other but they did not often exchange words.

"Frank," Peter said in a friendly voice. "How are you?"

"Great actually," Frank said breathlessly. "Alice and I went on a date; we're doing great."

Peter winced a little at Frank's words and the pure-blood must have noticed for his eyes widened.

"I'm sorry," he said in a flurry. "I know her and Remus . . . and you are Remus's friend."

Frank broke off, trying to think of what to say next; however, he could not find the right words so he merely stood there with his mouth half open.

"Oi, Remus ditched her," Peter said and held up a hand. "Don't worry about it."

Frank closed his mouth ever so slowly and Peter continued on his walk, setting off at a rather brisk pace. Frank followed him, which honestly did not bother Peter, just made him curious as to why.

"Look, Peter . . ." Frank said slowly, thinking how he was going to cautiously ease into the conversation. "What happened . . . back there?"

That was what Peter was waiting for. Frank just wanted to know what happened to The Marauders. He just wanted to know why they were all avoiding one another. Peter sighed, unsure of how he was going to explain it to Frank.

"I honestly don't know," he said, looking at Frank with a shrug. "Best mates fight, right?"

Frank could take a hint but his curiosity seemed to be winning over his common sense. It was clear Peter was in no mood to talk about it yet Frank continued to press and pry.

"What happened?"

"We just had a disagreement," Peter lied, quickening his pace.

"About what?" Frank asked. "Is it because James snogged Lily?"

"Frank," Peter roared, whipping around and drawing out his wand. "Either you shut up or I will make you shut up. Now...go talk to someone else. Leave me be."

Peter stormed off, pocketing his wand. He knew he would definitely regret his boorish attitude later but he was in no mood to talk to anyone, let alone someone who was pestering him about his problems. Peter was always one who never yelled or acted out on anyone; for some odd reason, that was all he was doing lately. It seemed like his world just got a little bit darker.

Shaking his head, Peter shook off his irritation long enough to manage to get himself a decent meal. Remus had missed classes so he assumed the werewolf was going to miss the today's as well. Like a good friend he was, Peter went to their first class, sat down, and took notes.

He would have expected Remus to have been absent but seeing James and Sirius absent seemed to be a bit suspicious. Truthfully, he could not blame them for wanting to skive off when he was so close to doing it himself, but he forced himself to sit through class until the end, taking notes. Transfiguration seemed to go on for far too long and he was beginning to wonder if the clocks were slow.

However, his prayers were answered. The clock chimed as the signal to end class; students jumped from their seats, collecting their things and shoving it all into their book bags. Peter waited for most of the others to file out of the room before he started moving towards the door. He made it about halfway, one foot out the door and the other still in the room until:

"Pettigrew, we need to talk."

Peter huffed, cursing his life, and spun on his heels, walking slowly to the front of the room. Seeing Professor McGonagall one-on-one without his friends, she looked far more intimidating.

"Professor?" Peter said, his throat arid. "I get the material...I'll even work on it tonight if I have to...may I go?"

"That is not why I called you over here," Professor McGonagall said with a sigh.

"I know," Peter murmured. "That is what I was afraid of."

Professor McGonagall motioned for Peter to take a seat in one of the first row desks and the poor fifth year could not do anything but obey, sitting awkwardly in the seat feeling like he was going straight to the gallows.

"On a rare occasion, I do ask my students what their lives are like out of school," Professor McGonagall began, pacing around her desk a little. "As aberrant as this is, Pettigrew, I want to know where your friends are."

"I don't know," Peter said at once, then checked himself. "I honestly do not have a clue, Professor."

She seemed to deflate a little. She _had_ seen James and Sirius yesterday but this was the second day Remus was gone and everywhere she looked, she could not find a trace of the werewolf. She knew she should talk to Professor Dumbledore but she decided against it.

"May I go now?" Peter asked, looking confused.

"Go," Professor McGonagall said unprofessionally. "If you do find them...tell them I want them all back in my class."

Peter knew her message was much deeper than what she portrayed it to be. Peter knew she cared for every one of her students and what was going on in their lives even if she really did not do much of anything but teach and yell. He swung his book bag over his shoulder and left, walking out as quickly as possible.

As he turned the corner and vanished out of sight, he fell to his knees and leaned against the wall, wishing somehow everything would magically fix itself.

* * *

Sirius sat in an empty classroom, very much emulating Remus. He sat with his chair balanced on the back two legs, looking up at the ceiling as if he was genuinely interested in it. The Black heir was feeling very reckless at this moment and as he sat, drinking that offending alcohol, he began to formulate ideas. His judgment, clouded by everything that has happened, Sirius's intoxication was dangerous.

Tonight was the full moon, which meant Remus would be either spending it alone or with the others; however, Sirius had other ideas. He hummed at the prospect of it all, grinning to himself as he tipped the bottle back to his lips. The entire room reeked of the whiskey but it did not seem to bother the Black heir. There was a knock on the door. With a lazy flick of his wand, Sirius flung the door open.

James came walking in, only to start coughing. The stench hit him square in his nose, making his eyes water. Sirius jumped slightly but he resumed his nonchalant demeanor, lounging on the chair with his feet kicked up on the desk. A bottle hung loosely from his fingers. James did not pry the bottle away, only motioning for it. Sirius grinned lazily and handed James the bottle.

"Are you all right?" Sirius asked, looking at his best mate with scrutiny. "You seem a bit off."

"I know," James said and swallowed the whiskey. "Tonight's the full moon, Padfoot. We're still going to be there."

"I know," Sirius said casually. "I will."

"Show up a bit more sober," James said, rising to his feet. "I've got to go. I'll see you later, mate."

Though the meeting was brief, Sirius felt drained. He set the bottle on the ground and looked about the classroom. What had he been reduced to?

Sirius sucked in his breath then turned his gaze onto his shaking hands. He did not know why he was shaking, whether it was from nerves or the firewhiskey, he could not tell, but he only made it magicked the rest of it away and stood up.

He was staggering on his feet so he decided to sit back down. Evidently, he could spare a few hours with what he thought was going to be the ultimate idea.

* * *

 **What is he conniving? Sorry this chapter was so short. The next one is going to be longer, any guesses why? I swear the next chapter won't be as lousy as this one. Stay tuned?**


	24. XXIV: My Friends, What Have I Done?

**All rights remain.**

"Wormtail?" James called out softly, hoping Peter was in bed.

He had been searching the castle for hours looking for Peter. Ever since he finished his brief chat with Sirius, he knew he would be pretty much useless. His heart sunk at the sight of the Black heir; he had those times where he came to realize how much he relied on his mates. Today was one of those times. James knew he couldn't help Remus alone, he needed someone there, for the physical and emotional support.

"Wormtail? Please answer me," James implored gently.

This time, there was the sound of rustling sheets. Peter emerged from behind his closed curtains and looked at James with an impassive stare. Peter's blue eyes were filled with exasperation and exhaustion. James did not know what to say to his friend; it was rare to find his words lost. Peter raised an eyebrow, evidently waiting for James to say something, so the Potter inhaled deeply and plunged on like a true Gryffindor.

"I know we haven't been on our best behavior. I get that," James said, waving his hand miserably. "We've all been acting like right prats and...and I want to fix that. But I can't do it alone. I need your help, Wormtail. Please, I need your help."

"What do you want me to do?" Peter asked bluntly.

"I need your help down at the Shrieking Shack," James said with his head hung low. "I want to help Remus but I can't do it without your help."

Peter snorted, smirking terribly. He shook his head in disbelief, making James flinch.

"I'm never any help, remember?" Peter asked, dangerously quiet. "I remember, it was like a knife in my heart but I suppose if that is what you all believe, then so be it. I can't change your mind nor would I bother trying. Just leave me alone, Potter."

James felt himself curse that night over and over again. He, again, was lost for words. James hoped this would not be an continuously ongoing thing; all he could do was gape like an idiot, looking for something to defend himself with. Peter snorted again and slid past James, yanking the door open. However, with Seeker's speed, James jumped forward and slammed his shoulder against the door, blocking Peter in.

"Move away," Peter growled, sounding actually menacing. "I mean it."

James clutched Peter's shoulders like a lifeline and threw all of his weight on to his friend. Peter stumbled slightly but accepted the hug without a word. James felt stung and hurt all over again when he did not feel the hug being returned but he was glad Peter was not shoving him away. James wanted to break down in tears but he needed to keep his head for tonight. Something told him it was going to go wrong.

"Please, Wormtail!" James cried, clinging onto him. "I need you more than you need me, I get it. I get it! I can't do this anymore. Please..."

Peter hated seeing James like this. He honestly hated seeing his friends in such a troubled state; Peter bit his lip and pushed James back, holding him at an arm's length away.

"I'll be there," he said simply. "For Remus, so if we are going, we should head on over there now."

James's eyes flew wide open, searching Peter in case this may have been some kind of a cruel hoax. However, the sincerity in Peter's voice told him he was not joking. James could not believe it, perhaps this could work. He beamed, almost fainting in relief, but he pulled himself together and yanked the door open. Together, he and Peter flew down the stairs, taking two at a time, and rushed out of the Common Room.

Finally, something was going right.

* * *

Remus shifted his position uncomfortably, finding the soreness creeping up in his limbs. Madam Pomfrey seemed to have noticed his discomfort and headed over to him with her eyes narrowed.

"Do you need more?" Madam Pomfrey asked, holding up the vile.

"Perhaps," Remus said.

In reality, Remus knew he would be spending the full moon alone so he wanted to make it as less painful as he could. The past two days had been stressful and he knew it would affect his condition and his transformation.

"Here."

Remus thanked her quietly, hoping the could just drown in the potions he was drinking. Wincing, he swallowed the rest and set the vile on the nightstand beside the bed. Madam Pomfrey picked it up and turned back to him.

"Is there anything else before you head out?"

"Sorry?" Remus said, his head turning to her. "Are you not going there tonight?"

"I'm sorry but there's been some urgency at St. Mungos," she said and pursed her lips. "I asked if I could go any other day but their running short on Healers, Lupin. There have been some pretty bad attacks."

"From...?" Remus said, unable to finish.

"From Greyback."

Remus's heart froze, blood turning cold. Of course he would recognize that name. His eyes widened as he tried to collect himself underneath the scrutiny of Madam Pomfrey. It wasn't he who was attacked, so why was he so disturbed by the news...because he was once one of those victims, lying in the bed wondering if his life really did end. He knew what it was like.

"I hate him," Remus said bitterly and he actually meant it. "He's a monster."

 _Monster,_ that was what his friends called him.

Remus's walk to the Whomping Willow was surprisingly calming; it soothed his nerves and it almost gave him the false hope of confidence. Remus looked up at the sky, looking at the stars in their multitudes. He smiled faintly as he spotted one constellation that stuck out at him: Sirius.

His friends ran off with his heart in their hands.

 _Oh, my friends,_ Remus thought in anguish. _Is this what we have been reduced to? Forgive me, my friends._

When he reached the Whomping Willow, he levitated a nearby stick and prodded the knot at the base of the trunk. The Whomping Willow froze before it had a chance to start its attack. Remus looked up at it with a sniff then, with one look at the constellation, he hurried into the base of the trunk.

With a steady pace, Remus set forward along the winding stone path.

* * *

"What is with you?" Lily said in exasperation. "Why are you so obsessed?"

"I'm only trying to find out what they're up to," Snape replied furiously.

Lily swung her hair back, looking at Snape with an irritated glare. Despite her extreme dislike for them, she felt like she needed to say something in their defense.

"It's none of your business."

This seemed to set Snape on edge and he ground his teeth.

"Fine, I'm finding out one way or another, Lily."

With that, Snape parted, feeling his heart suffer from walking away from her. Snape had never really fought with Lily, it felt foreign to his heart, which was why it was hurting. Lily was not just the love of his life, she was his life. His life was all down into one person. Her name was Lily.

"Oi, Snivellus!"

Sirius may or may not have been slurring his words. He may or may not have been completely inebriated but at least he could walk. It was later at night, just after dinner and Sirius had been spending the day lounging in the empty classroom, playing with magic.

"Black," Snape said, curling his lip back in displeasure.

"I heard," Sirius said in a dramatic whisper. He leaned against the wall behind him. "I heard you have a little theory in mind."

The expression of Snape's face went from disgruntled to guarded in a fraction of a second. Sirius retaliated when he caught sight of Snape's change of mood and smirked viciously. He pointed a finger and took a staggering step closer.

"Merlin, you're in for a secret," Sirius said and pushed himself off the wall. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Told me what, Black?" Snape said but with less contempt. "What are talking about?"

"I'm talking about you and me and the universe," Sirius slurred, gesturing grandly to the ceiling above them. "I could be a motivational speaker, what do you reckon?"

"I reckon you tell me what you are rambling on about," Snape said dangerously. "What are you going on about?"

"Calm down," Sirius said and leaned back against the wall once again. "I'll tell you in a minute."

Snape rolled his eyes in an irritated fashion but allowed Sirius to regain his posture and peer dramatically to the left and to the right.

"Do you know the Whomping Willow?" Sirius asked, slinging an arm sloppily over Snape's shoulder. "Do you?"

"The tree right by the little pond?" Snape asked eagerly, but recomposing himself.

"Yep," Sirius said with a happy grin. "The very one."

"What about it, Black?" Snape growled impatiently.

"Take a stick and prod the base of the trunk," Sirius sang.

Sirius had probably made one of the worst mistakes in his life; too bad he was too out of it to even realize the domino of damage he just started.

* * *

"What are you doing, Prongs?" Peter asked.

"Going the normal way," James said. "It takes too long to get there through the trail. Four legs are faster than two."

Peter glared at James, who merely started sprinting in the opposite direction. The winter air was cold and the snow was soaking through their shoes. Peter could see a million flaws in James's plan.

"They'd see your prints," Peter pointed out.

"You'll stay as yourself, climb on my back, and wipe away my prints," James stated.

Peter rolled his eyes but before he could refute, James began the transformation in the dark; Peter watched as his friend went from James to the stag. Despite being there and becoming an Animagus himself, he still had a hard time getting use to the whole idea. James stamped his foreleg, bobbing his head impatiently as Peter just stood there. Shaking himself out of his daze, Peter moved forward.

"You are going to have to bend," Peter said.

James buckled his forelegs into a bow and allowed Peter to climb up onto his back. It felt strange, much different than emulating a horse as a human on hands and knees. James felt like there was hardly any weight on his back although Peter was sitting on his shoulders, which did feel a bit uncomfortable. Luckily, Peter shifted his position and pulled out his wand.

"I'm ready," Peter said.

James looked forward and started cantering. The ride must have been unpleasantly bumpy for poor Peter because with every stride, he could feel Peter bounce up and down. James did his best to try and smooth out his gait. Then, Peter saw him wipe away his tracks, filling them with more snow with flicks of his wand.

Peter had no idea where to hang on, there were no reins he could cling to. He hated this very much.

James had a bit of trouble breathing for Peter's legs were digging painfully into his ribs. He wanted to slow down and tell Peter to stop suffocating him, but he kept going. He crossed the bridge that led them to Hogsmeade, past the sign, and veered right off the trail.

The snow was much deeper, making James lurch and stumble unevenly as he fought through the snow. Peter grumbled about how he would rather walk, James snorted, and suddenly, they miscalculated the slope and lurched forward.

Peter yelped and James bleated; James's legs buckled beneath his large body and his hind legs kicked upward as he was thrown on the side. Peter was thrown off James's back and he fell into the snow, losing his wand in the flight.

"My wand!" Peter cried out, looking desperately through the snow.

James, however, having more mass, continued to fall down the slope. His ribs felt like someone sucker-punched him. Faintly, he could hear Peter cry in despair and moments later hear him cry out again, but this time in relief. Finally, when he stopped sliding downward, he picked himself up and shook out his fur.

"Go, go!" Peter shouted.

James flicked his ears up in wariness but Peter was already shouting at him, waving his arms. Confused, James began to pad backward but then he saw something that made his heart leap to his throat. There were shouts that did not belong to Peter. They must have alerted the keepers of Hogsmeade. Lights from wands above gave away their hiding place.

James knew Peter had an escape, being able to hide as a rat in the snow, but James was more than ten times the size of a rat and had no chance of hiding. He turned on his hind legs and bounded through the snow, pleading his four legs to work in his favor.

James looked back over his shoulder, pained to be leaving Peter alone. But he could no longer see his friend, which meant he must have transformed and hid. James continued to bound through the snow, not letting it hinder his agility. He ran straight to the Shrieking Shack and rounded the corner, listening intently with his enhanced hearing.

He was definitely not coming through Hogsmeade on his way back.

* * *

Remus heard shouting and instantly shrunk away from the window. But curiosity got the best of him and he peered out the side window and his eyes widened in shock. There was a beast at the base of the Shrieking Shack. It almost looked like...

"Hang on!"

Remus threw himself down the stairs, fighting through the debris of the place. He ran into one of the rooms and peered outside the window. It was most definitely James, he recognized the sleek body of that stag anytime.

He rushed over to the door and yanked it open, wincing as the cold air stung his face. The stag swung his head around and immediately rushed in, transforming back to James as Remus slammed the door shut.

"Prongs!" Remus whispered. "Are you mad? What are you doing?"

"I had to come help you," James said, biting his lip. "I saved time by going through Hogsmeade. I can't fit through the trail very comfortably. I thought it'd be quicker to...well...it looks like we caught the attention of the keepers at Hogsmeade."

"No kidding," Remus said, then looked back out the window. "Where's Wormtail?"

"He had to run," James said. "He was able to escape...I hope..."

Remus knew James felt bad for not sticking with the plan so the werewolf merely sighed with relief, hugging James tightly. James jumped in shock but instantly hugged him back. Perhaps this night was going to be all right.

"Let's get you back," James said.

"I'm sorry," Remus said, placing a hand on the back of James's neck. "I don't fancy her. I don't fancy anyone."

"I know," James said.

The two walked back to the room together, enjoying the silence but one another's company. Once they came up the stairs, Peter came scurrying in, looking wind bitten, tired, but all right otherwise. Both Remus and James yelped in surprise at the sight of Peter transforming back into his normal self then recovered.

"Blimey," Remus said, looking around. "How'd you manage?"

Peter grinned, looking proud of himself.

"I transformed, got away, transformed back into a human to run the rest of the way here, transformed into rat to get up here, transformed back into a human, and here you are!"

James blinked then burst out in laughter. James's laugh was always contagious so Remus and Peter joined in, finding themselves at ease once more. Deep down, Remus wished desperately Sirius was with them, laughing with them, but yet, he wasn't.

"James Potter!" came a frantic voice. "Prongs, please answer! Please!"

James sobered up and pulled out his two-way mirror. His mouth hung open slightly at the sight in his hands. Evidently, something was wrong. Remus barely had any time to comprehend it for he felt a sharp jab of pain that made its way through his veins, pumping agony into his being.

Remus began transforming.

* * *

"Prongs," Sirius said breathlessly, tears in his startling gray eyes. "You have to go stop him! I sent him down there! I sent him there!"

"What?" James said, trying to make sense of Sirius's words. "What are you talking about?"

Sirius was trying to hold back his tears as he raced outside, not caring if anyone saw him. He had to make it in time to Remus; he had to extinguish what he had just ignited. He would never forgive himself.

"I sent Snape to the Willow! He's after you!" Sirius cried out, winded. "You've got to stop him from reaching the end of the tunnel!"

James visibly paled from the other side of the mirror and Sirius felt like the world's biggest failure. His vision was blurred by the tears but even through them, he could see James's face harden in sheer anger.

"You idiot!" James roared. "What have you done?"

There was howling at the other side and Sirius could feel all of his alcohol coming back up his throat. Remus was transforming, Sirius had to talk to James while he was still human (which put James in danger) and Peter could not defend himself as a small rat (which meant Peter was forced to stay human), and now he had sent Snape down there.

"You drunk idiot!" James shouted, piercing Sirius in the heart. "You've really done it this time."

With that, James left before Sirius could apologize. The Black heir stopped running for a moment and hurled up whatever was in his stomach at the time. He did not even bother trying to waste time cleaning it. After all, it was red wine, which was all he had in the past two days.

He hated himself.

He always hated himself but now he really hated himself.

He could never get over the anger and disappointment in James's expression. It would haunt him forever. He cursed the hour he started drinking, he cursed the minute he started talking to Snape. He cursed the second he was born. He leaped into the air and landed on four paws, his breath fogging in clouds of warmth. His fur ruffled in the wind and his tail streamed behind him as he hounded over the ground.

The Willow was still frozen but its branches began to flicker. Sirius stopped to sniff the air, catching the scene of Snape lingering about. With a growl, Sirius launched forward, avoiding the branches as they began to sway. He ducked and swerved out of its way, landing right at the base of the trunk.

He fit himself through and began to sprint down the stone trail. He could definitely smell Snape, which meant he was definitely down here. Sirius felt guilt gnawing at him from the inside out but he had to push it away. He needed to fix what he broke.

* * *

James gasped and threw himself out the room, dragging Peter along with him.

"Snape's coming over here."

"I can hear just fine!" Peter snapped, feeling very nervous.

Before anyone could do anything, a howl split their ears, making them wince and clap their hands to protect their eardrums. Whipping around, both Peter and James were staring at a fully-fledged werewolf.

It rose up on its hind legs and roared.

"Wormtail!"

James called out to Peter before he transformed into stag. Peter brandished his wand at the werewolf and shot red sparks at the werewolf. However, it only seemed to have angered the beast; the werewolf turned on Peter and snapped his jaws inches away from Peter's hand.

The fifth year backed himself against the wall and as the werewolf advanced, Peter poked it hard in the eye. The werewolf retaliated, howling with agony as it reared. When it was on its hind legs, James came charging with his head down.

The sickening crunch of bone told James he had just broken something inside of the werewolf. Claws gauged themselves deep into James's flank as the werewolf fought off its attacker. However, it crashed, landing on its side, wheezing.

James reared back, his legs collapsing underneath him. Blood splattered the wall they were fighting closest to and James's antler part of James's antler was broken off, clattering onto the ground. Peter stifled a gasp behind his hand. Peter immediately transformed into a rat, scurrying over to James to check his wounds.

The echoing sound of James's antler falling to the ground seemed to have sparked some life back into him. Without warning, he stood up and transformed back into his human self. James scooped up Peter into the highest place he could reach and ran out, feeling the werewolf's claws against the back of his neck.

James slammed the doors shut but it only delayed the werewolf for it burst through anyway. James had just barely escaped with his life; he could still feel the ghost of those claws ripping his throat out. James did not have the time to contemplate his life; he threw himself down the stairs, using the banister to help him swing right into the hole in the ground.

James could feel the breath of the werewolf on his neck as he just narrowly missed it. He looked back up to see the jaws of the werewolf snapping at his face; however, the beast could not fit itself through.

James heaved a sigh and sprinted down the trail; his side was burning for it was cut up by the claws of the werewolf. Just as he thought he caught a break, there was a crashing noise, making James halt in his tracks.

Then he heard snarling.

The werewolf was in the tunnel.

James stifled a cry and raced forward, not looking back. He would never stand a chance against a werewolf as a human and trapped in a tiny tunnel. Though he could not see the werewolf, James could hear it pounding forward.

As it twisted a little, James ran into someone and they both went down. Pain flared up in his side, making the wound seep more blood and his hip was definitely bruising. However, the roar sent a jolt through his body.

"Snape, move!" James shouted.

Snape, who did not quite know who it was, was now being dragged down the tunnel. Someone had grabbed his wrist and was dragging him back. Snape had gotten this far, he wanted to see what was going on. He was about to dig his heels into the ground and insist they unhand him, but he heard another growl and instantly changed his mind.

So, he looked forward and his jaw dropped.

"P-Potter?"

"That's right," James said, forcing him to run faster. "You slimy git."

"Let go of me, Potter," Snape snarled, trying to twist free.

"If you stop and it catches up to us, you are going to be begging for your life," James said, pulling out his wand. "Keep running!"

"What are we running from?" Snape bellowed.

Just as those words were spoken, the werewolf flung itself into view; both Snape and James faltered slightly at the sight of the beast. Its teeth were dripping with saliva and blood, it bore stab wounds from James, and its eyes were feasting upon its next meal.

"RUN!"

James shot a stunning spell at the werewolf but missed horrendously. The two of them ran for their lives, sprinting until their hearts would give out.

"Stupefy!"

The spell shot straight into the heart of the werewolf, knocking it off its paws but it was still conscious. Snape and James continued to run until they were winding down to the other side. The clearing could be seen but it still felt so far away.

Snape tripped on the uneven ground and the werewolf was upon them, barring down on Snape; it saliva dripped on the Slytherin's face as it bared its teeth close to Snape's ear. James rushed forward and swung at the werewolf's face.

It reared, taking a step back.

"Run, you imbecile!" James roared.

Snape did as he was told and James threw his arms out wide; the werewolf reared on its hind legs and James did what only worked one other time.

"No, Remus!"

The werewolf roared again but it stopped, turning its head at James with its teeth bared at him. Snape faltered, falling back to the ground in surprise before scrambling back up and running the rest of the way out.

James bit his lip and threw himself backward as the werewolf lunged at him. James launched forward, missing the werewolf's jaws by mere inches. His heart slammed in his chest as he burst out of the tunnel. He turned back to see if it was following them.

For a moment it was silent, the only thing that could be heard was Snape's ragged breathing but something burst from the tree. James only caught a glimpse of it before something knocked him hard in the ribs, carrying him right off his feet and into the grass.

The Whomping Willow was fighting back.

James groaned, unable to get up. The sound of a whimper told him the tree had hit the werewolf, too. As he lifted his head weakly, he saw something streak past him in a flash of dark black. With a snarl, there was a horrible tearing noise and a cry of agony from one of the animals.

Snape seemed to have lost consciousness for he was no longer stirring. James crawled over to the Slytherin and checked to see if he was still breathing, which he was. James closed his eyes in relief but he slumped over and did not open them.

Sirius was ripping and clawing at the werewolf, leaving no room for mercy. His teeth dug deep into the werewolf's forearm and he dragged his incisors as painfully as he could. He winced at the taste of blood and bits of flesh hanging on his teeth, but he was determined to stop it.

* * *

Sirius groaned, stirring from the frozen ground. He transformed back into a human and instantly regretted the decision. Peter was at his side; he must have melted the snow around them and put a weakened heating spell around them to keep them warm. His face was grimy, sweaty, and dirty. His clothes were torn and ragged, his hair was matted in blood.

"Wormtail?" Sirius murmured.

"Don't talk," Peter said.

Sirius noticed the shortness in his friend's tone but he obeyed. And then it all hit him. The memories of the past few days welled up inside him, pushing him over the edge. He just betrayed his friend. He just gave away Remus's secret.

His head could not take it, his heart failed to work. What happened after he was knocked out from the flailing branches of the Whoming Willow? Where were James, Remus, and Snape?

His eyes caught sight at what Peter was holding in his hand. At first, he thought it was Peter's wand but upon closer inspection, he gasped.

It was James's antler.

What had he done?

* * *

 **I'm splitting these chapters. Stay tuned.**

 **And thank you for reviewing, all of you. This story made it to a hundred. Thank you all so kindly.**


	25. XXV: Music of the Night

**All rights remain.**

~PRESENT~

Everything in Remus's body was telling him to stop moving, to stop trying, to go back to sleep. However, he was far too curious to know what had gone down since he transformed. As he propped himself on his elbows, he gasped; his hands flew to his broken and ribs that were screaming.

"Lie back down."

The voice that spoke was soft and mollifying, telling him it was going to be okay even though Remus could detect worry in the voice.

"Peter," Remus said, laying back down.

He could feel the tiredness seep back into him and his eyes began close; he blinked once but something caught his eye. His eyes flew open; lying in a bed in the Hospital Wing on Peter's other side was James. In Peter's hand was something that Remus thought was his wand at first. However, upon closer inspection, he noticed it was an antler. It was James's antler.

"What have I done?" Remus whispered, afraid of himself.

"It wasn't your fault," Peter said, reaching out to touch Remus's arm. "He impaled you and you broke it off."

Remus covered his mouth with his hand, tears springing to his eyes. The werewolf had ripped the stag's antler off? How was he not a monster—he had deemed himself so unworthy for so long and he believed it so deeply, it was rooted into his heart.

Now with his worst fears confronted right before his eyes, Remus found he could not handle it. The pain of the truth was sharper than a tip of a blade—something he would much rather take than all of his emotional pain.

"Where—where is Padfoot?" Remus asked, looking around the room.

"Somewhere," Peter said shortly.

Remus noted the hard tone Peter used and tried not looking taken aback or the slightest bit worried. However, he must have made some of it evident for Peter did a double-take and sighed heavily, slumping in his chair.

"I think it's best to wake James up if we are going to relive last night."

Just that sentence was able to drive Remus in a panic. Suddenly, he did not want to be there—his doubts seemed to be crushing his chest as Peter gently leaned over and stirred James awake. It seemed like it took ages—far too long—before James started responding.

"Hey, Prongs—hey, we wanted to talk to you."

James just looked at Peter with a blank stare before he slowly sat up.. James's side was bandaged heavily from something ripping his flesh off. Remus bit his lip to stop him from shouting out. James's shirt was unbuttoned, revealing the rest of the damage.

"What did you tell Madam Pomfrey?" Remus rasped, feeling his throat was too arid.

"I was flying and hit the Whomping Willow," James said, wincing but grinning. "I managed to only get a warning about being out after hours flying."

"She believed you?" Remus breathed.

There was some of his worry and stress lifting from his chest and shoulders—however, there still was a significant amount still hounding against him. He watched James wave Remus off with the same grin he was wearing.

"I'm a good liar," James said.

Remus couldn't argue that. He kind of shrugged and looked at James, trying to calculate the damage he inflicted on his friend. He tried not to look bothered by Sirius's absence but he swallowed it back and focused on those with him.

"All right, I want to know what happened."

Peter had no idea how to lay this on Remus without upsetting his friend. His mind raced through several scenarios but all ending up the same way, breaking Remus's heart.

"Okay," Peter said with a nod. "Just...sit back, okay?"

Remus obliged but his heart began to beat hard against his chest, echoing the beating of the war drums.

"After you transformed, you had some trouble settling in your new skin," Peter began, trying to look at Remus but looked fixedly at the point over Remus's shoulder. "James and I were there with you but Sirius wasn't."

"Where was he?" Remus interjected before he could stop himself.

"He was...drunk," Peter said, wincing for the words seemed to draw a knife in his chest. "He...somehow must have...forgotten."

Remus had no idea where this story was taking them but the way his friends both looked at him solemnly told him to beware.

"What?" the werewolf pressed urgently. "What is it?"

James stood up, feeling bad for being the bearer of bad news. He hobbled over to Remus's bed, sat down right beside him, and placed a hand on either shoulder of the fifth year. He wanted him to hear this once and only once.

"Snape was there."

Remus's blood froze in horror as James said those three words. He could not feel his heart pumping, why wasn't his heart working? His head, his head was pounding instead of his heart. Remus tried not panicking, he really did, but he began to anyway.

"No," James said, trying to soothe him. "Listen...you weren't there afterward."

"How can being there afterward make it any better?" Remus asked, his voice rising in pitch. "What have we done? What have I done? Oh _Merlin_! What have I done?"

* * *

~FLASHBACK~

"What have you done, Sirius?" Peter screeched, looking at the three unconscious figures.

"I don't know!" Sirius cried out in despair.

Peter took one sniff and recoiled in disgust, his lip curling back as he glared daggers at Sirius.

"You're drunk," he stated but more like spat. "Once you're sober, maybe I'll talk to you."

Peter pointedly turned his back on Sirius, trying to figure out what to do with three unconscious people, one being a werewolf. He was never put in this situation and that First Aid class he went to did not prepare him for anything like this.

Nevertheless, he walked over to James and knelt beside his friend, checking over his wounds. Peter noted the claw marks that tore right through James's jacket and etched themselves deep in his skin, pulsating blood.

"Quick!" Peter said, pulling out his wand. "What was that spell that's used to bandage?"

" _Ferula_ ," Sirius said at once.

"Right," he muttered shortly. He pointed wand at James. " _Ferula_!"

Bandages did fall out of his Peter's wand but did a poor and sloppy way of wrapping themselves around James's torso.

"Are you applying a tourniquet or something?" Sirius asked, trying to inch closer.

"Around his sternum?" Peter snapped impatiently. "No, I am trying to get these bandages to help with all this blood."

His bandages were wrapped messily and were certainly ineffective. Peter tried thinking what he should do but his mind seemed to blank on him.

" _Wingardium_ _leviosa_ ," Peter said, pointing his wand at James.

It was a weak spell, only lifting James a little off the ground but it was enough room to give Peter the chance to work. He pointed his wand at the bandages, still having James suspended, and began wrapping the bandages around the other's midriff.

When he was done, he used a temporary sticking charm to secure the end of the bandage.

Sirius blinked, trying not to be hurt at Peter's coldness but failed. He slowly tried reaching for James.

"Can I help?"

But Peter whipped around, his eyes wild with anger. It was like a territorial dog guarding its land.

"Stay away," Peter spat, bristling.

Sirius felt his statement right in his heart. He retaliated just in case Peter might lash out but even scrambling back, Peter advanced.

"You stay away from me right now," he said, pointing a finger at Sirius. "I do not want your help."

Sirius pressed the back of his hand to his mouth to stifle the sobs that were racking his body. Tears pooled in his stormy gray eyes but Peter was having none of that, not in the mood to sympathize for the Black heir.

"You need to pull yourself together, Sirius," Peter said bluntly, "because what you did to Remus, it's called betrayal."

Sirius just dug the heel of his palm in his eyes, trying to stop the flow of tears from falling. Peter did not say anything else, merely turning back to see the damage his friends inflicted on one another.

He moved over to Snape to see what happened to the Slytherin. Despite his strong dislike for Snape, he stood over Snape to see nothing but a few scrapes and bruises. He was sure they had a Strengthening Potion or Draught for that. Deciding Snape was not on the top of his priority list, he finally stopped a few feet away from the unconscious werewolf.

He knew he should not be afraid, he knew he put his trust...and life into Remus, just as he did for the rest of them. Peter slowly and very cautiously stuck a hand out, wand in the other, and inched closer to the beast.

It did not stir, it did not wake, it did nothing. Peter held his breath, even Sirius was silent, and placed a very gentle hand on the werewolf's snout. It growled slightly, baring its teeth, but not waking. Suddenly, soft-bound ropes tied themselves around the werewolf and staked them into themselves into the ground.

Peter looked around to see Sirius holding his wand.

"To make sure he doesn't thrash and reopen the wounds," Sirius explained then backed away.

Peter muttered his thanks and moved to the werewolf, feeling slightly better. He patted the beast's muzzle and examined the wounds. Sirius had done a number on the werewolf as did the Whomping Willow. The werewolf, having to fight both at once, had taken the serious blows.

Gashes were scored across the werewolf's muzzle; its upper lip was cut open from Sirius's teeth. Claw marks stretched across the flanks, making it look like a complicated map of lines.

Both Sirius and Peter knew it was easy to fade away those scars on Remus but their gazes both turned to the unconscious form of James; the werewolf marks were not going to heal accordingly. James was going to bear those marks for the rest of his life. Remus was going to beat that guilt for the rest of his life.

Peter sighed, turning back to the werewolf. The marks of an angry tree bore its sign. Peter sighed, deciding he honestly did not know what to do for bruises and minor cuts. Remus had lived through worse, hadn't he? Peter averted his attention back to the wounds that were slowly seeping blood.

Suddenly, the werewolf's eyes opened and it instantly curled its lip back.

Peter leaped back in surprise, trying to calm his racing heart. The werewolf woke.

The werewolf tried rising to its paws but found it was bound to the ground. It snarled, twisted, and howled in fury but it could not escape.

"We're here to help," Peter said pointlessly. He scrambled away from the mouth of the werewolf.

He moved to the side, making the werewolf writhe against the ropes. It was snarling, ripping, and tearing at the ropes. Its barks grew louder and more vicious but rising in pitch.

However, the werewolf's eyes were glued to Sirius, not to Peter. It took a while for him to understand but he finally did and stood up.

"Sirius, get back."

Sirius found the command peculiar but did not listen.

"He's scared of you," Peter said, pointing at the shaking werewolf.

Its fur was on end and its lips were curled back to reveal two rows of sharp teeth. Its ears were back and eyes never leaving Sirius. Its bark was high pitched and mingled with snarls and growls but, like Peter pointed out, it was shaking.

"What?" Sirius asked, knitting his eyebrows.

"He recognizes you by scent," Peter explained, eyes still on the werewolf. "You were the one who attacked him. He remembers you by scent."

Sirius's eyes widened in understanding despite Peter's equivocated explanation. He took a step back and turned into a dog.

The werewolf began thrashing again, screaming in anger and warning. Peter was about to tell Sirius off but the dog merely lay down, crawling on his belly.

Sirius inched closer to the werewolf this way, managing to get much closer without the werewolf lashing out. Sirius sniffed the werewolf, tail wagging but not stiffly or slowly. The werewolf merely let out a low growl that served as warning.

Sirius, however, let out a whine, hoping it would send the message of peace. The werewolf stiffened and stilled until the dog was right up to its muzzle. The werewolf began to growl once more, exerting its dominance on the dog.

Sirius's tail stopped wagging but he remained calm and relaxed. It seemed to tame the werewolf enough for it slowly began to sink back down, ceasing all attempts to break free. Peter was able to see the damage inflicted upon the werewolf though he could not do anything about it.

"Should we get these two awake?" Peter asked, looking at Snape and James.

"Should we?" Sirius asked.

"We need Professor Dumbledore's help. We can't deal with this huge mess ourselves, Sirius. After a careful five years of hiding his secret, Snape knows about it. We need help."

Sirius bit his lip, trying not to think of how much trouble he was going to get in. He could not believe it was the first thing that came to his mind. Peter seemed to have noticed Sirius's hesitance and rolled his eyes in disbelief.

"You must be joking," Peter deadpanned, catching on.

Sirius looked away guilty and walked over to James:

" _Rennervate_ ," he said with a flick of his wand.

James's eyes fluttered open for the briefest of moments, realizing what was going on. He took one look at Sirius and instantly looked away. The Black heir pretended not to be hurt at the rejection.

"We have to get all of you back up to the castle—we need to see Professor Dumbledore."

"Sirius, I'll go get Professor Dumbledore—you bring Snape and James to the castle," Peter decided, thinking quickly.

"What about Remus?" Sirius asked, pointing at the werewolf still bond to the ground.

"Have fun dragging a werewolf to the castle," James said dryly, though his voice lacked the usual bite whenever he used that tone. "Leave him here and we'll come back."

Sirius looked as if he was going to object but he had no other option because bringing Remus in his state was certainly not one. So, Sirius used his wand and pointed it at Snape after Peter ran off to find Professor Dumbledore.

" _Rennervate_ ," Sirius said, flicking his wand.

Snape came to with a gasp and a wince of pain. He shot upward, looking around at the mess before him. James was trying not to cry out as he moved, clutching his sides as he did for the bandages were not tight enough to stem the flow of blood. Snape growled at the sight of his two least favorite people—and a werewolf a little ways off. To say the least, Snape was very confused but he did remember one thing from tonight: Remus Lupin was a werewolf.

He struggled to rise to his feet but Sirius pointed a wand at him.

"You're staying here."

"What?" Snape spat. "Like hell I am. Don't tell me what to do, Black."

"I am going to," Sirius said more forcefully. "Move and I will stun you."

Snape drew out his own wand—

"Snape!" James said, catching the attention of the other. " _Expelliarmus_."

"Nice one, James," Sirius said quietly.

James caught what Sirius said but he did not acknowledge the praise for he was still enraged at his best mate. He kept his eyes glued firmly to Snape, watching him carefully in case he might try anything.

"For once in your pathetic life, can you just listen to us?" James shouted then gasped in pain. "We've got to get Dumbledore."

"What for?" Snape spat. "I'll have you expelled for this!"

"Shut up!" Sirius roared, panicking blocking his better judgment. "We've got to think..."

"For once," James snarled, pinning his glare at Sirius. "Eh?"

"Do not turn against me now," Sirius said, pacing frantically.

James hissed under his breath and staggered to his feet; he immediately doubled over, grumbling about the extreme discomfort that was shooting through his body. Without another word, he began heading up to the castle. Every step was agony, limping and favoring one side hardly alleviated the pain.

Snape watched him warily and snorted.

"If you think I'm going up to the castle with you, forget it."

James just glared at him. His patience was running thin and stuck with the person that started it all, he was in no good mood to negotiate. With the person who was threatening his best mate, that was the icing on the top of every other bad thing that went wrong last night.

"You're going with us," James snarled, his eyes ablaze with righteous anger.

.oOo.

"You did _what_?" Professor McGonagall screeched.

Sirius flinched, licking his bottom lip as he avoided everyone's gaze. The confession seemed worse than the physical wounds he received. He wished to battle another werewolf than be standing in the middle of the Headmaster's oval office with everyone's disapproving eyes.

"From the start will do, Mr. Black," Professor Dumbledore said calmly.

His eyes portrayed no emotions, no sympathy, nothing; however, Sirius could see the ghost of disappointment etched in the wise man's face. His face burned with shame, humiliation, and most of all, guilt.

How was he supposed to tell everyone he was a drunk idiot and spilled Remus's secret for Snape to find out? How was he supposed to tell everyone he was a drunk idiot that almost made Remus a murderer? How was he supposed to tell everyone he was a drunk idiot that almost had two people killed?

"Mr. Black?" Professor Dumbledore prompted. "Pray, what happened?"

"I," Sirius collected himself, determined not to lose his non-existent confidence. "I was in an empty classroom drinking."

He broke off when he caught sight of Professor McGonagall's outraged face. She opened her mouth furiously, pointing a finger at him, but Professor Dumbledore held up his hand to interrupt her. His eyes never left Sirius. The Black heir wanted nothing more than for someone to take him away and bury him six feet under the ground.

"I...it was the night of the full moon...obviously," he started up; his confidence fell out pretty quickly and suddenly, he felt like he was going to break down again. But he knew he couldn't. "I heard Sni—er—Snape and Evans talking right outside the classroom I was sitting in."

Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall were listening with rapt attention while James was being looked over by Madam Pomfrey. Peter was sitting next to James, looking worriedly over his shoulder at the wounded boy. Snape was laying on another conjured stretcher although he was sitting up.

"And what compelled you to talk to Mr. Snape?" Professor Dumbledore asked gently.

Sirius ran a hand through his still-perfect hair.

"I heard Snape talking to Evans about...I heard Snape talking about where we go every full moon. My intoxicated mind told me to go and talk to him about it since it did involve me."

Sirius looked away, avidly staring at a point on the wall.

"You are telling me, my own descendant started this whole mess?" Phineas Nigellus Black, a man in a portrait snorted. "What an utter disgrace. What until Walburga hears of this."

"No," Sirius said desperately, turning to the familiar face of Phineas Nigellus Black. "Don't say anything to her; she'd never forgive me."

"As she shouldn't," Phineas Nigellus Black said with a huff. He stuck his nose in the air.

"Enough," Professor Dumbledore said sternly. "Mr. Black?"

"Which one?" Phineas Nigellus Black sniffed with an arrogant tone. "Him or me?"

Professor Dumbledore's eyes never left Sirius as he leaned forward. He gave Sirius a little nod, one that told him to continue with the story. Sirius wished he was just a man in a portrait. That way, he would not mess up so much. The poor bloke already hated his existence, this just made things worse.

"I told Snape how to get past the Whomping Willow but it was a prank. I never thought he would actually do it."

James rose to a sitting position, waving and ignoring the protesting Madam Pomfrey. His face grew livid and cold as stone as he curled his lip back.

"You knew full well Snape couldn't keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business!"

The shouting took a toll on James for he doubled back over, wheezing and clutching his fiery ribs. He gripped the edge of the stretcher in pain.

"Sit back down, Potter!" Madam Pomfrey barked angrily.

James obliged but he did so glaring at Sirius. The Black heir turned back to Professor Dumbledore without a word to James. It was better if he avoided replying in case all of his roiled emotions came forth in the form of terrible words.

"Anyway, I kind of...woke up after realizing what I did. James figured out what I had done."

James stood up, again ignoring Madam Pomfrey.

"I pulled his sorry arse out of the tunnel, risking my ruddy life because he—" James pointed at Sirius, "—couldn't keep his mouth shut. And he—" James pointed at Snape, "—felt the need to invade our personal lives like some kind of stalker."

Snape rose in fury, his lip curling back and his pallid face paling with unsaid words.

"I am _not_ a stalker," Snape snarled.

"Then why are you so obsessed with us?" James fired up.

"I am _not_ obsessed with you— _especially you_ ," Snape shot back.

"Boys!" Professor McGonagall shouted, raising her voice over the argument. "We have bigger things to discuss. Black, if you would elaborate, please do so."

"I found them all outside the Whomping Willow," Sirius said, deciding that his story was finally winding down. "The tree knocked them all out."

Peter stood up this time, adding his own input.

"We tied Remus to the ground and he's still there. We have to make sure no one can see him."

Professor Dumbledore looked at Peter in questioning. The eyebrow of the Headmaster rose but he only nodded as his response. Professor McGonagall, however, took her stand in front of Sirius, glowering down at him in overwhelming disappointment.

"I am ashamed of and for you, Black," she said with a solemn shake of her head. "You've made a mistake with some of the worst consequences. You just lost Gryffindor three-fourths of their points."

Sirius wanted to tell her House Points were the least of his worries but he nodded, not meeting her eye. He was like a submissive dog; he could take on a werewolf and battle and win for dominance but he could never stand up to Professor McGonagall.

James scoffed but he allowed Madam Pomfrey to guide him back to the stretcher.

"That's not what I'm afraid of," Sirius whispered ever so softly.

Professor McGonagall did not look at Sirius in sympathy but with softer gaze. She stepped away from Sirius and moved to Professor Dumbledore.

"Headmaster, we need to get Lupin out of there."

"Before we do, I daresay I have one more thing to add," Professor Dumbledore said without one smile. He rose to his feet and looked at all of the students before him. "I want your complete attention, if I may."

All four heads turned to look at him.

"Mr. Snape?" Professor Dumbledore said, turning to face the Slytherin.

No matter how much Snape hated the world and everyone in it, save for Evans, he stood up and walked over to the Headmaster; his stance showed his respect for the Professor.

"You have to promise never to tell," Professor Dumbledore said solemnly.

Snape sniffed; it were anyone else telling him not to tell, he'd go running about Hogwarts screaming it at the top of his lungs. But the sincerity in Professor Dumbledore's voice had him holding his tongue, keeping back from completely ruining their lives.

"Mr. Snape, you are sworn into secrecy by the Headmaster," Professor Dumbledore explained but his voice did not sound threatening or exerting any authority. It sounded like a clear and simple statement.

"I—" Snape inhaled deeply, making his decision right now. "I won't tell anyone."

* * *

~PRESENT~

Remus bit his lip, his hands twisting in his lap as he listened to the story. By the time it was over, his hand was rubbing his mouth in shock, disbelief, betrayal, hurt, and anger.

"You have got to be joking," Remus whispered.

"I'm sorry," Peter said, looking helpless. "After that, Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall ran out to wait for you. They did a load of protection and concealment charms until you transformed back. You were still bond but they freed you and took you up here."

"So..." Remus was lost for words, unable to think of one thing to say.

"I don't know what else to say," Peter said with a despairing shake of his head. "I wish I could tell you this was nothing but a bad dream."

Remus just closed his eyes and folded his hands in his lap, forcing them not to move in nervousness. He was determined not to show any nervousness.

"Wait," the werewolf said, suddenly thinking.

"What?" Peter asked, afraid of the question.

"Where is Padfoot?"

"I dunno."

Remus just inhaled deeply, trying to make sense of what just happened to him. After five careful years, he had gone through so much pain and exhaustion to keep his condition a secret and with a few words from a drunk, it was all ruined. Remus felt more than betrayed by Sirius.

"Now what?" Remus asked.

"I dunno, Moony, I dunno."

.oOo.

The clock ticked away the minutes and chased off Remus's self-confidence. Just when he truly believed he had things under control, it spiraled right back out of his grasp. It was as if he was trying to rein in a wild horse, grabbing on to the reins but letting go when it all became too much.

It was living in constant fear of Snape telling everyone what he was. Despite having Professor Dumbledore on his side, Remus never felt more alone. The little voice in the back of his mind told him to quit feeling sorry for himself, especially when his friends were all standing on his side, barring down on Sirius, who had no one.

Madam Pomfrey had released Remus, healing his wounds because they were made from a dog and a tree and not by himself. Peter and Remus opted to stay in the Hospital Wing with James. The poor bloke was not allowed to leave, having marks of a werewolf down his side.

Remus hardly spoke in those past few hours, realizing he had done this to his friend. How could he forgive himself if he had infected James somehow?

It was times like this that made Remus want to up and leave everything. He knew it was a horrible way to deal with problems but he was not running away from life or problems, he was running from those who were causing them. Again, he knew it was not fair but his mind at the time was telling him it was okay.

"Moony?"

Remus winced internally. Even after everything, they were still using one another's nicknames, finding it more bizarre to call each other by their real names.

"Yeah?" Remus asked, turning to Peter.

"Do you—want to find Padfoot?"

Remus had pondered that exact question for the past two hours. He was not sure if he was ready to face the other but at the same time, he really wanted to talk to Sirius, to know what was going through his head during that time. He wanted answers.

"Yeah," he answered.

Peter's eyebrows raised high in questioning. James's eyes fluttered open at the sound of an interesting conversation and he fought back a cough.

"Why?" James asked.

"I want to know what was going on with him," Remus replied lamely.

"Are you going to forgive him?" James asked.

It was not forced, he did not sound biased or demanding of an answer. The question was innocent curiosity but even Remus could not answer. He looked thoughtful but remained silent.

"It's okay," James said, his voice guarded. "I don't mind staying here while you go find Padfoot. Heaven knows where he is."

There was a pause of silence.

"That was your invitation," James said with a chuckle.

Remus smiled gratefully at James before standing up and exiting the Hospital Wing, pushing past those great double oaken doors. Remus felt like he was stepping into a brave, new, world even though he honestly wasn't. He heaved a sigh and tried to imagine where a guilty Black heir would hide. His first thought was Common Room but that would have been too obvious. And then an idea struck him.

Remus bundled himself in his Hogwarts robe as he raced up those millions of stone stairs. It was a bit ridiculous how high the Owlery was and it was ridiculous how much effort it took for them to send a letter. However, he finally made it to the top, looking wind bitten, cold, and breathless. Upon looking around, he did not see Sirius and he was about to curse the world when he caught sight of Ohanzee.

His owl hooted and spread his great wings, fluttering down beside him. Remus stroked the owl's feathery back until his eyes landed on the one he wanted to see. He knew Sirius liked it up in the Owlery. No one came around, the walk was too long, and the weather was too cold. He cleared his throat and announced his presence.

Sirius whipped around in surprise, his own owl beside him. Remus frowned a little at the tears from the gray eyes but he said nothing. Looking at Sirius now, it felt like he was looking at a stranger, someone who was simply impersonating his best mate. The Black heir even held himself differently; it was guarded as if he was debating fight or flight. What was happening?

"Remus?"

The sound of his real name coming from Sirius's mouth hurt him and churned his stomach. He was so nervous, he was shaking, definitely knowing it was not because of the cold. Nothing else in the world seemed to matter but talking to Sirius, getting inside his head to know what had happened that night.

"Sirius?" Remus replied equally.

Sirius looked uncomfortable. His heart was slamming against his chest, threatening to have a coronary. He felt faint enough to pass out just looking at the face of the one he broke. He turned his face away from the cold and unfeeling light, listening to the beating of his heart.

"Sirius?" Remus repeated.

He was surrendering into his darkest thoughts; he wanted to flee. He wanted to run and never look back. He wanted to cry and rage at the same time. He wanted to crawl under a rock and die.

"Answer me," Remus said, though not unkindly.

Sirius began to lose touch of everything he was feeling. He was losing the feeling of his emotion. His mind was blanking out on him; he was unable to think of anything to say. What scared him most, he was not sure what he could feel looking at Remus. Was he feeling guilty? Yes, he was, but the intensity of the guilt was numbing everything else.

"What?" Remus said, shrugging his shoulders.

"I don't want to talk about it," Sirius said stiffly.

"It's not really up to you, is it?" Remus said harshly, his expression growing cold.

"What do you expect, Remus?" Sirius bit back, his tone equally harsh. "Do you expect me to fall to your knees and beg for your forgiveness. I won't until I know you'll accept it."

Remus just rolled his eyes, sick and tired of his act. However, he never got to say anything else. Sirius had freed his owl and shoved past Remus, heading back down the stairs. He hadn't even said a word. Sirius just opted to leave, deciding Remus was no longer worth his time.

Remus felt like he had been spit upon but he knew Sirius was just acting out of grief. He knew this was not the real Sirius. He knew the real Sirius cared. He knew he was only trying to convince himself.

* * *

 **Sorry for the late update. Oi, that rhymed. This was written out hastily so I apologize for its lack of...element..?**

 **I feel bad because I really honestly have no choice but to write anguished chapters. This is when The Marauders split. I'm just sticking with the plot, I promise.**


	26. XXVI: Hope NeverAlways Works

**All rights remain.**

"Black, you know you are not allowed up here."

Sirius shrugged, looking outward. He desperately hoped the Astronomy Tower would remain unoccupied. It was just too cold and too much of a walk to head over to the Owlery or Boathouse. He just wanted to hide.

It had been a rough couple of days; it had been exactly four days since the accident and things were only going downhill from that night. Sirius was losing the respect of his friends fast. James was pointedly ignoring his existence, keeping him at an arm's length away. Peter was respectful but cold, giving Sirius nods of acknowledgement before walking away. And Remus—

Remus was the worst. He withdrew from everyone, even James and Peter. He hardly spoke, he hardly smiled, he hardly did anything but stick his nose in a book, avoiding everyone else. It was a sight that was nearly unbearable; Sirius hated how broken Remus looked and then he kept reminding himself he was the sole reason why Remus was nothing but an echo of his once happy self.

More than once, he saw Remus walking down the corridor with unshed tears in his eyes. The worst bit about seeing Remus like that was the impassive expression he wore. The werewolf did not even wear a sad expression; it was just dead and dull. The life in his eyes burned out that night.

Sirius had never felt worse about himself than he did right then. There were points during the day he wished he was not even alive. He wanted to consume himself in poison but he forced himself to live through this emotional agony. He forced himself to bear every moment of it.

"You are out of bed after hours, Black. You need to get back to bed."

Sirius shrugged, not giving a damn anymore. His world seemed to be falling anyway, what would detention do? The numbness evaporated, leaving him with so many emotions, it was becoming all...too...much...

He shook his head, reminding himself he did this to himself. It was only fair for him to endure it. He was turning into Remus, tears in his eyes but his face unreadable, cold, distant.

"What's going on, Black?"

Sirius finally looked around to see Professor McGonagall standing in her day clothes and everything. She had a stern look but at the sight of the devastated Black heir, her gaze softened ever so slightly. She deflated her stiff composure and walked over to Sirius.

"I know you're feeling bad," she commented.

"What do you expect me to feel?" Sirius asked, his voice shaking with anguish. "I feel like a monster for what I did, Professor."

He did not look at her. He was a Gryffindor, he was in her House. He had let everyone down, his classmates, his professors, his friends...himself.

He held his breath, trying to control his shaking hands that were gripping the rails tightly. He would not look at her, if he did, he would only see disappointment in her eyes and he would break down.

"My friends," Sirius whispered, letting the tears fall. "They hate me, Professor."

Professor McGonagall sighed, hating seeing her students so lost and empty. She placed a hand on the railing and the other on her hip. Her tough demeanor lessened as she watched the Black heir drown himself in self-hate and despair. No matter how professional she was, she really did care about her students.

She spoke in a gentler tone when she addressed Sirius, hoping she could somehow bring some sense back into her student.

She, too, noticed the way Sirius's friends were acting towards him. She had been keeping a particularly close eye on Remus but Sirius was suffering as much as Remus was, and that was evident.

"Your friends don't hate you," Professor McGonagall said calmly. "They are just disappointed in you, Black. We all are but I think you disappointed yourself the most."

Sirius closed his eyes, bowing his head as his shoulders shook. He promised himself he would not break down. He dug the heel of his palm in his eyes, trying to control his tears that were falling on their own accord...against his will. He inhaled raggedly and turned away from Professor McGonagall.

"I hate myself, Professor. I hate myself so much."

The whisper was filled with pain and sorrow, drenched in something much deeper—so deep words could not explain it. Sirius could feel his heart being carved out while it was still beating. He yearned to rip it out the rest of the way, willing himself to stop trying, to stop feeling, to stop breathing.

"Don't give up," Professor McGonagall stated simply. "If your friends mean that much to you...don't give up, Black."

Sirius could hardly comprehend her words but somehow...somehow...it sparked something within him. But it dulled when he remembered how his friends were completely ignoring him.

"I...I can't," Sirius said through painful gasps. "I...they won't talk to me."

Professor McGonagall looked at him with burning intensity. She was one for sympathy once in a while but she was not one for self-pitying or excuses.

"Make them see why they should."

* * *

James was having a hard time finding Remus. In fact, it was getting more and more difficult to catch the fifth year. Everytime James managed to corner the Gryffindor, Remus would always slip away—important essay to turn in, talking to a professor, tired and will talk later—all these eccuses were petty but serving him well.

James was losing Peter as well. Peter was talking less and less with James and Remus and spending more time with Frank and his friends. James was feeling abandoned by his friends and he was hurt.

James did not even bother with Sirius. He was furious at the sick humor Sirius had. He was angry, betrayed, shaken, and most importantly disappointed. If they could not trust Sirius with his friend's most important secret, how could they trust him with anything?

The Marauders were splitting apart and it was evident they were doing so. People began to talk.

They were whispering whenever one of them was walking down the corridors alone. All four of them pretended they did not notice even though it was the most noticeable thing to see.

James cursed every time he saw someone point at him and murmur something to their companion. He was something more than a weird exhibit that people could sit around and gossip about.

He tried on several occasions to reach Peter but he was always seen with Frank Longbottom, Bernie Wells, Alice Prewett, Emmeline Vance, and Dorcas Meadows. James was not about to torture himself and approach them all at once.

He never disliked Frank for as long as he lived...he disliked Frank's girlfriend but nothing past that. It hurt him a bit as he realized he could not even approach Frank anymore.

He closed his eyes briefly as he walked down the halls alone.

* * *

Remus sat in the Owlery, hidng out of sight by one of the ledges. The cold wind bit but he could not care less as he wrapped his arms around his knees and rested his chin on them. He had to feel nothing, he wanted to be numb. He wanted to give in to the depressing thoughts of his mind as he recalled everything that happened. He felt lost...confused...troubled...and he had no one to turn to.

He was dependent on his friends for his happiness. It had been five solid years of their friendship and now they were all splitting apart. Remus had to bite back a sob as his quisling mind went forward in time...The Marauders never talking to one another. Remus pressed the back of his hand to his mouth to control himself. He wanted to go to Heaven and be at peace once more.

He wished someone could raise him up on wings, bearing him on the breath of a new dawn, a new day. He just wanted the pain to go away as he sent a silent plea to the sky. Remus didn't even feel betrayed. He just feel deep sadness, something he could not shake no matter how hard he tried.

"Make this pain stop," he pleaded softly to the wind. "And I will do what you want."

He just wanted to leave Hogwarts even though he knew it wasn't an option. However, he felt compelled to do so because he knew he would never land a job in the Wizarding World with what he was and how society treated his kind.

If his own friends thought him as a monster...

Remus opted to the last decision he wanted to turn to but he began to close off his emotions—one door at a time—until he would no longer feel anything. Remus had a harder time doing so unfortunately and he simply could not close them all off.

He closed his eyes and decided he needed to get up and walk around. He could enjoy the evening down by the lake.

.oOo.

James had no idea why he at the lake. It was nothig special but for some reason, he enjoyed the tranquility and silence until he spotted his friend lying in the grass. James steeled his heart and marched over to his friend, shedding his book bag along the way. His black cloak billowed at his ankles as he moved swiftly and silently.

Finally, he bellowed:

"Remus!"

Remus jolted out of his peaceful state of mind as soon as he heard the voice. It was frightening to hear, especially since he knew exactly why James was mad and had a perfectly good reason to be. Remus couldn't help but jump to his feet and bolt.

James let out a string of curse words in Remus's general direction and broke into a sprint. His legs were not as fast as Remus's but he had four legs instead of two. James burst forth as a stag and galloped, easily closing the distance.

As soon as he was within reach, James changed back and body slammed Remus in the side and threw them both the ground in a heap.

Remus swore he broke his wrist as he clutched it tight to his chest. He was trying to glare daggers at James but the pain was making his brain fuzzy and hazy.

"What was that for?" Remus demanded. "Start explaining!"

"You run away from me. You run away from your problems and that's not what a Gryffindor does," James said, still breathless.

"Well, ow," Remus deadpanned, gingerly poking at his wrist. "Bloody ow!"

"Will you talk to me?" James ground out in frustration.

"What for? What am I supposed to say, Potter? Hello?" Remus asked. " _Ferula."_

Bandages appeared on Remus's wrist as he wrapped them and his mask of a flippant attitude was a shield between the real Remus and James.

"Cut the act, bastard," James swore, curling his lip back. "I am in no mood for your attitude tonight, you hear?"

"Loud and clear," Remus said, taken aback and hurt. "The truth has a habit of falling out of your mouth."

"Good," James sneered at Remus. "At least one of us has the fortitude of telling the truth."

"At least one of us has the intelligence to know not to knock people off their feet," Remus said haughtily. "Goodbye, Potter."

Remus got up but James tugged him right back down with Seeker's speed, latching onto the werewolf's wrist and refusing to let go. Remus would have found this irritating any other day but now he found it extremely irritating...perhaps that was a lie. He would have been fondly exasperated any other day but he was annoyed and most definitely full of spite. Remus and spite were never put together in the same sentence.

"Remus, please," James implored heavily. "Please don't shut us out. Please don't turn away."

"Drop it, James Potter," Remus demanded, twisting his arm free.

"Why?" James asked, voice raw with roiled emotions. "Why are you like this? Why are you turning your back on everyone? What are you trying to hide from? What are you so afraid of?"

"I almost became a murderer," Remus snarled, baring his teeth. "Shutting you out is the only way to keep you safe."

James shook his head, not wanting to believe this was the only way the four of them could solve things on their own. He closed his eyes; if Remus was shutting him out, he was just going to try harder to stay in the werewolf's life. He was not backing down so easily.

"I'm not letting you, Remus Lupin."

"Why?" Remus growled, whipping around to face James. His eyes were gold...burning gold...it made James take a step back. "I already let you go."

With that being said, Remus spun on his heels and disappeared, letting the darkness hide him and James could only watch in emotional agony as his source of light, hope, and happiness burned out...just like the other two lights he used for guidance. He was a sailor lost at sea.

* * *

"Stop!" James roared. He really needed a whistle. "Stop! STOP!"

The Gryffindors stopped flying and gathered in a semi-circle around James. The Quidditch Captain tilted his chin up at them as he sighed heavily. Finding a new team was never easy and being Quidditch Captain was making it harder.

"I've made my decision," he said, raising up a hand to keep them silent. He looked down at his notes.

"Our Beaters are still Sirius and Vitani."

He flipped the page.

"Our Chasers are Oliver, Jacqui, and Grason."

He flipped the page again.

"Our Keeper is Harley."

He paused.

"Are there any questions, objections, or declarations? None? Good. Dismissed!"

He cut tryouts early, deciding that this was what he was going to choose no matter what but people were muttering as they all descended. He kept himself in the air, hoping he could get some time to himself but something in the back of his mind was nagging him as he watched Sirius and Vitani land together and walk off.

He sighed, knowing he was being unreasonable but anger and hurt had clouded his better judgment. Silently, he slipped away, ready to clear his head.

.oOo.

Sirius was good at pretending that nothing was bothering him as he flew down with Vitani but everything was eating him alive. He needed an escape from it all and what better way to do it then let loose?

He knew it was kind of wrong but she was an easy-going girl and one who was not a force to be reckoned with but if she respected him and concurred, he didn't think it was too bad.

"Sirius?" Vitani said, nudging him. "You're spacing out again."

Sirius blinked then muttered an apology.

"You're thinking of James?" she pressed as she pulled the hair tie out. "I'm not stupid; I know you four haven't been talking."

"You just proved you know how to gossip," Sirius deadpanned. "The entire school knows we aren't talking but no one knows why-all these stupid reasons I heard around are so inaccurate, it's amusing."

"That's why they are called rumors," Vitani said gently. "Rumors don't always mean the truth, you know?

Sirius sniffed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I just have so little patience for this but they mean the world to me and without them, well, my life feels...I dunno."

"I get it," Vitani said with a shrug. "You just feel lost without certain friendships. I'm sure you aren't the only one who feels like that."

"Meaning?" Sirius asked almost in a dead tone.

"Meaning I bet your mates are feeling just as sore as you are," Vitani said, closing the locker and walking over to him. "I've seen the way our Captain was acting today. He rarely yells at people but he was really shouting at Oliver. He's on edge."

"Whatever," Sirius said roughly. "That's his problem, not mine. Are you ready to go?"

Vitani sighed and took his hand with a nod.

The two walked out of the changing rooms and headed up to the castle.

.oOo.

James stared at his hands as he hovered right above the treetops. He was emotionally exhausted about ready to call it quits and stop trying but the reasonable voice in his head was telling him giving up was a craven thing to do.

James could not help but agree, sickened with himself for even considering giving up on his friends. James sighed and looked at his dangling feet, wondering how much easier it would be if he could just punch all of his friends in his face.

"Potter?"

James jolted at the sound of his name and blinked in surprise. Peter was on his broom, hovering feet away from James.

"I thought I would find you in the air," Peter added.

"Wormtail?" James asked carefully, unsure of why his friend was here.

"I'm not going to say much to you, Potter, I just want you to know Remus is trying to replace his blood with alcohol in Hogsmeade and I can't stop him by myself."

James closed his eyes at the image of Remus trying to drink away his pain. He sucked in his breath and forced his eyes open.

"Let's go," he said with a nod.

Without another word, he zoomed off in the direction of Hogsmeade, trying to understand why Remus would want to do such a thing when it really was alcohol and intoxication that started this entire thing.

Nonetheless, he did not question.

.oOo.

Remus stumbled onto the bench and stretched out, deciding it would help his roiled stomach. He tipped the bottle to his lips and closed his eyes as it slid down his throat, burning it like mad.

He hummed appreciatively as he felt his emotions close off once more. Peter had watched him drink away his pain, a little at a time, but he just could not get drunk enough to keep the pain at bay.

"Hey, Moony."

Remus shivered at the voice and turned around to see James and Peter. Confused, he tilted his head in questioning as he took another long drag from the bottle.

"Ironic, Moony, that this is what you are doing?" James said, motioning to the firewhiskey. "This is what started it all."

"Go away, James Potter. I don't want to talk to you," Remus said, turning around so his back was facing James.

It was clear this was Remus's first bottle because he was hardly slurring his words but it was still slightly unnerving and quite haunting to see Remus with an alcohol bottle in his hands.

"Are you going to tell me why you're doing this?" James asked.

"No."

James pursed his lips, walked right in front of Remus, and seized the bottle. He tipped it to his own lips, taking a large swig, and tossing it aside, not caring that it was spilling everywhere.

"Why are you shutting us out? We're helping you...or at least we are trying to," James said firmly, grabbing Remus's shoulders and holding on tight. "Why are you letting us go?"

"If there is one thing I have learned, it is to hold your enemies closer," Remus said with simplicity. "Why are you here? Are you here to try to win back the remains of our friendship or something?"

"For one, I want you to stop being such a prat," James snarled. "And you can explain to me why you are avoiding us."

"Fine," Remus said with a shrug, his eyes and voice devoid of all emotion. "I am ignoring you because I know all you want is to try to get us all back together so everything can go back to the way it was. I don't want that. I am ignoring Sirius because he is the one who did this. And I am not ignoring Peter. He is the only one who has the decency to learn what to say and when."

His monologue was leaving him breathless but his emotions seemed to have died tonight for they were not coming back and Remus was not feeling. He glared at James with a level stare.

"I thought our friendship was something bigger than all this," James said sadly, waving a vague hand at the sky in general. "I thought...that we would be there for each other when things got tough...no matter how tough..."

"People change," Remus said shortly. "That I have noticed in everyone."

James closed his eyes, hurt.

Remus scoffed and stood up, dusting the dirt off his clothes as he did so.

"Thanks for the talk," he said sarcastically. "But be on your way and I'll be on mine."

James did not know if he should let his friend walk away...to give him and space if that was truly what he wanted. Remus sniffed and turned his chin up at James and he spun on his heel and walked off.

Peter shook his head at the both of them and made his way back to the castle. He would not continuously watch his friends eat at each other.

James watched his two friends split off in different directions and he had no idea which one to follow. His heart was telling him Remus but his mind was telling him Peter. Going with his mind, James forced his legs to follow Peter, calling out his name hoarsely and wearily.

"You know, I'm so glad we are communicating so well," Peter said harshly. "If you would just stop to listen instead of always having to get your two-bits in, James, you might actually get somewhere other than right back to the beginning. I'm just saying."

Peter said this all very clearly and he continued to walk away.

James, to say the least, was very stung and very taken aback; he had no idea what made him the enemy now and what made all three of his friends turn on him when he had done nothing wrong.

There it was.

James refused to believe he had done anything wrong. He thought everything he _had_ done was warranted for he never made Remus feel forced into forgiving Sirius or anything of that sorts. But his attitude and belief he did nothing wrong was probably the thing that was driving everyone away.

.oOo.

Remus was honestly on the brink of forgiving his friends, all of them, but then James just reminded him why he hadn't in the first place. It wasn't just because he was afraid he would hurt them again but all the little things they never went over and talked about...that was all just...building up and waiting to explode. Now it had and Remus was sure to never go back.

The past was done.

Offward and onward.

Remus decided that it was time to think logically about this entire ordeal and think about what really was the consequences of his actions. Was it worth the risk of hurting his friends and keeping his happiness and pretty much sanity? Probably but he would have to take precaution and the trust he once felt for all three of them was dwindling low. Of course, Remus was a bit too shy to admit that he was feeling hurt by the betrayal and opting to shut everyone out for their own safety as an excuse to hide what really hurt him the most.

"Therapy," he said to himself. "If this ever goes back to normal, we need to see a therapist...all four of us."

He decided this was what he was going to plan next and first if they ever reunited. But Remus knew not to get his hopes up when they were so vulnerable and easily smashed back down.

* * *

 **KaiaRenkin: Thank you so much! You're words are like bells from anything divine (weird analogy? Sorry). Anyway, you're awesome, the world needs more awesome people like you. So never stop being awesome.**

 **Raven that flies at night: I know right, can't they just get their shite together and kiss and make up? I'm telling you...they have communication issues.**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: Maybe the next chapter they will finally get their act together. Knock some sense into Sirius, knock James down a few pegs, build Remus up a little, and take some stress off Peter's shoulders. One could hope, right?**

 **Also, I am so ridiculously sorry for taking so long. I promise the next chapter will be up within three days. I was busy with real life business and hadn't much time to write.**


	27. XXVII: One Word—Therapy

**All rights remain.**

"Bloody hell, I need a whistle," James muttered to himself. "Stop! STOP!"

He shouted the last part and shot sparks into the air with his wand. James wasn't going to torture himself into watching his team play like a load of chickens without their heads. He could have sworn he chose the right players but they were acting like they couldn't communicate...or play for that matter.

"What is going on here?" James barked.

His team only looked in confusion so he pointed to each one and went over exactly what they were doing wrong, feeling no shame or guilt for being so horribly and brutally honest and blunt.

"Harley, a Keeper's goal is to protect the goals! You're hovering over one and leaving the other two completely unprotected."

He hovered in front of Oliver.

"Mate, I've known you for a while, so why can't you _communicate_?" James barked. "You're acting like you don't want this or something because you're open but not saying anything. I'm confused."

He didn't wait for a response but moved to Jacqui.

"You are a skilled flier so why won't you go for the Quaffle more? I can't have Chasers who won't play their position. Jacqui, you have precise aiming but you need to actually call for the Quaffle. You and Oliver, both!"

He moved to Grason.

"Again, you are a superb player; I've seen you at tryouts. Where is your sense of aim, man?" James asked, slapping a hand to his forehead. "It's all over the place. It's like your aiming for the goals with your bloody eyes shut."

He hovered in front of Vitani.

"I have worked with you since I started on this team, what gives? You have a great arm so why are you like...tapping the Bludger like it's going to make a difference? You're not even trying to aim it at anyone. It seems like you're just whacking it wherever and unfortunately, that is now how being a Beater works."

He closed his eyes and automatically moved down the line.

"And Sirius?" James said, devoid of all emotion. "You are playing like you don't have a head. You missed three ruddy Bludgers that were going right after you and the ones you actually hit you missed completely."

He covered his eyes with his hand.

"Practice is over, you're dismissed."

The team let out a disappointed groan and a collective sigh and all flew to the changing room, not daring to look back at their Captain. James, however, stopped Sirius by swerving in front of him.

"Sorry?" Sirius tried and attempted to get past him.

James swerved again and held up his hand.

"This has to stop."

Sirius blinked.

"Oh, just get a new Beater then."

James growled.

"This, us, our fight, this distrust, this dislike, this hostility, this has to stop."

Sirius rolled his eyes and swerved downward, managing to get so far before James stopped him again. It was seriously getting annoying but Sirius had no intention of starting a full fight in front of his teammates.

"Oh, you're only trying to salvage our friendship for the sake of the team," Sirius said, snapping his fingers in mock realization. "Gee, why didn't we do that before? It would have solved everything."

The sneer in Sirius's voice was enough to send James into a flurry of angry words but he was done fighting this. He was done trying to mend together something that was never meant to be put back together. Instead, he was going to build something new.

"I'm not asking to talk to you for the sake of our team. I'm doing it because you're still my best mate and I need you, Sirius. I need the real Sirius Black. The one who actually gives a damn about other's feelings. The one who cares."

"You've left him for dead," Sirius spat. "Get out of my way."

"No," James protested. "I know he's still there, Sirius. Please, _I forgive you._ "

Those three words seemed to unlock every emotional vault in Sirius's being for he looked at James with such raw emotion, it was so surreal to see him so vulnerable. Finally, James had broken down his protective walls.

"Y-you do?" Sirius dared to ask.

"Yes," James said, moving his broom closer to Sirius. "I will always forgive you."

Sirius looked at James like a scared child, afraid that whatever he says next would send James away and wake him up from this beautiful fantasy. For so long, Sirius felt like tipping himself off the Astronomy Tower but now that James was before him and telling him he was forgiven, it all seemed to...happy.

"Sirius?" James pressed, worried about his friend's silence.

"Thank you, Prongs," Sirius whispered, his heart flooding with tears as were his eyes. "You...you have no idea how much this means to me..."

 _And my sanity,_ Sirius added inside his head.

"We're all flesh," James said, reaching out to touch Sirius's arms. "We all make mistakes."

Sirius jumped a little at the contact but he did not pull away. Instead, he moved right up to James and engulfed him in an embrace, one that told James everything about what he was feeling and thinking.

James savored the pair of arms around his neck and leaned into the embrace, glad to finally have his real Sirius back: his brother.

"I've missed you," Jame admitted. "So much. I thought this time we had destroyed you."

"I won't say that you didn't because you did for that time," Sirius said sagely. "But I know I did the same to you three so I know the favor was only returned. However, it was still three against one so odds were unbalanced."

"It wasn't three against one," James protested with a frown. "It was all four of us against each other because the moment you left, we were going at each other's throats like mad.

"That's what I am worried about," Sirius confessed and shook his head. "What if Remus doesn't forgive me?"

"Explain to him why he should and he will," James decided and tapped his fingers against his knee.

Sirius closed his eyes.

* * *

Remus was eating his first square meal he had in days. He had a piece of toast, a bowl of oatmeal, and a nice glass of marmalade. His knee bounced as he read a book, nose buried in its pages as if he was trying to escape reality. The Great Hall was rather empty this morning due to everyone practicing Quidditch and everyone wanting to watch them practice.

But he wasn't complaining. He quite like the soft murmurs and the quietness of it all; the only problem was a certain redhead was sitting a little farther down the table than he was and he could feel said certain redhead's gaze burning into the side of his face.

Little did Remus know Sirius was on the other side of those huge, double, oaken doors. He was sitting by peacefully when someone with a voice that was very recognizable cleared their throat.

"James, I swear, I told you to leave me alone and I am _trying_ to read and I want nothing more to do with you."

He knew Lily was looking at him as if he sprouted a second head and he realized that everyone else thought he was being a little too harsh but Remus was having no more of it. He was sick of being a doormat, of being underestimated by everyone and most importantly, he was sick of looking bad in front of Sirius and James.

"If that's how you feel . . ."

Remus paused at the voice, he knew that voice; the werewolf whipped around to see Sirius Orion Black standing behind him with James on his left. Remus instantly tilted his chin up at Sirius and met the other's gaze in challenge.

"I didn't mean any of that to happen," Sirius said, the actual anguish in his voice made Remus want to reevaluate his own words. "I promise."

"No, you just betrayed me instead then came back telling me you didn't mean any of it," Remus summed up with a snarl in his tone. "I am going to pretend that you didn't just do that."

"Pretending won't make reality real," Sirius said before he could stop himself but he was not going to let Remus step all over him while he was hearing baring his heart for the other. "Just saying . . ."

Remus's eyes widened before narrowing.

"What do you want, Black?"

"For you to never call me that again for one and I came here to apologize, thinking you might actually be level headed enough to accept it," Sirius said coldly and calmly. "Maybe I'm being proven wrong."

Remus felt the werewolf inside him flare up as he belted Sirius in the nose, exactly like how Sirius had done on New Year.

James jumped in surprise and watched his friend crumple to the ground, clutching his heavily bleeding nose. Sirius remained sprawled out on the floor whilst Remus tightened his tie and readjusted his wristwatch.

" _That_ was for the betrayal," Remus said and shrugged casually.

"What the shite, Moony?" James yelped, accidentally using Remus's nickname and knowing the werewolf was going to be harp on him for that.

"And you are forgiven, Padfoot," Remus said and knelt down beside Sirius. He held outhis hand towards the Black heir with evident traces of trust.

"Thanks...Moony," Sirius whispered with sincerity. "Not for punching me but for...trusting me again."

Remus and Sirius grasped each other's wrist but Remus pulled back and drew out his wand.

 _"Episkey,"_ Remus said.

The sound of Sirius's nose fixing itself into place sounded loudly but Remus's spell had worked on him. His nose was throbbing less but evidently, still bleeding.

"I said I forgave you, Padfoot. I never said I trusted you."

Sirius kind of hung his head as Remus pocketed his wand. He didn't see the werewolf pull out something instead—a piece of chocolate—the sign of his truce.

"Thanks," Sirius said, taking it. "And—and I thought...of something...that would benefit all four of us."

All three of them looked at each other for a few seconds then said in unison:

"Therapy."

"Not just any therapy but like—friendship therapy," James said.

"I know a great place," Remus chimed in.

"We need all four of us," Sirius pointed out.

"Turn around, you old sod."

All three heads whipped around in surprise to see Peter Pettigrew standing with his arms folded and an impassive expression. James, Sirius, and Remus all looked at Peter for a moment, the silence heavy.

"Wormtail—"

"Sirius and I already have forgiven each other," Peter said, holding up his hands to stop James. He gave Sirius a nod. "I know you regret what happened. And I think you finally grew up enough to realize reality."

"I've learned," Sirius said earnestly. "I have."

"I know," Peter said in understanding. "That is why I have forgiven you."

Usually this would be their time to hug and make up but they were still hesitant, something was holding them back and they just could not pinpoint it exactly what it was. It was strange but trying to make sense of it was not going to happen right then.

Remus, Sirius, Peter, and James all looked at each other then sat down, two-by-two. Remus and James sat together as Sirius sat across from Remus and next to Peter.

"Are we serious about seeing a therapist?" James asked.

"We're holding back already," Remus said, gesturing to the four of them. "Look at us! We can't talk to one another without any level of tension."

"He's right," James admitted slowly. "I say we talk about it with someone neutral in the room—who has no sides in this matter."

"Yeah," Sirius said and shrugged. "Fine, that's fine. It works."

No one could predict what would happen.

* * *

It was odd The Marauders were sitting in circle in Headmaster Dumbledore's office with nervous looks on their faces. Dumbledore had sent in a witch who specialized in therapy.

"So, you're like a shrink who just sits here?" Sirius deadpanned.

"Blimey, Sirius," Remus spat. "Let's see if you can be a little ruder."

"I'm pretty sure I can," Sirius shot back.

"Shut up, the lot of you," James said wearily, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I don't have time or patience for you sods to be fighting."

Remus and Sirius both fell silent, folding their arms over their chests and crossing their legs at the ankles. Remus felt like he was being interrogated more so than simply talking about problems.

"I'm Genevieve," the witch said. "It looks like there is high tension already coming into this room?"

"Spot on," Sirius said sarcastically.

Remus did not try to quiet him down.

"Why don't you tell me why there is," Genevieve asked.

"For one, Sirius is always being rude and arrogant," Remus started, looking at Sirius then at the witch. "And he doesn't listen to anyone else's word but his own. It just bugs me."

"I, for one, have to agree with the not listening to anyone else's word bit, too," James said, shooting his friend a more sympathetic but still meaningful look. "You're great and all but you just doesn't listen to what others are saying to you. I dunno why you won't because sometimes it's things you need to hear."

Sirius closed his eyes for a moment then turned to Peter.

"Anything you'd like to add since everyone else is?" he asked, albeit his tone was not unkind or bitter, just accepting.

"I agree with Remus's statement," Peter said with a little shrug. He drummed his fingers on his knee. "I think you _can_ be too arrogant for your own good, sometimes. I dunno why either."

"Do you have anything to say, Sirius, about that?" Genevieve asked, looking at the Black heir with an encouraging nod.

"Yeah," Sirius said, sitting a little taller. "I do. I do have something to say."

He paused and turned in his seat to look at all his friends.

"I didn't know it bothered you but I _do_ know I am arrogant. I am for a reason," Sirius said with a bit of a defiant snarl. "Living and growing up as me forced you to put a shield around yourself."

"You don't have to," Remus said, sitting up in his chair. "You don't have to be like that in front of us."

Sirius shrugged and folded his arms over his chest.

"Remus, with everything you say, it's kind of hard not to."

Remus looked taken aback and very obviously so. James raised an eyebrow in suppressed surprise and Peter merely pursed his lips and waited for Sirius to elaborate.

"When you grow up and live life like I do, you're forced to act like haughty and proud. You are forced to act like you are higher above everyone else because that is what you were taught to do. So I am sorry that I am like that but it was how I was forced to be for so long."

"I don't follow," Remus said slowly. "Since when did you care about your family's customs and practices?"

"I stopped caring as soon as I was able to but that didn't mean I knew how to defend myself at the same time, too, Lupin. You may think my life is sheltered because I am not a werewolf and I am rich but being abused and tortured by your family is far from a luxury."

The tone in Sirius's voice as he spoke to Remus kind of—actually really hurt.

"I never thought your life was sheltered. I never thought any of ours were sheltered. Why didn'tyou say anything to us?"

"What's the point, Remus?" Sirius shot back. "What are you going to do? Tell on my dad and mum? I am dictated by the Black family—they will just intimidate everyone into submission like they always do. I don't know why you think thais will be any different."

Remus lowered his gaze in his own submission, knowing full-well Sirius was not lying. The Black family was simply too powerful and influential.

"Did you know this?" Genevieve asked, waving a hand to Sirius as she addressed the others.

"To an extent, I knew about the abuse but I was never given any details. I know Sirius loses weight every time he goes home—"

"—which means he doesn't eat properly there," James said, finishing Peter's sentence.

Sirius thought he could handle this with a flippant attitude but hearing this all from his friends made it hard not to get choked up. He promised himself he would not get emotional but his walls were breaking, the ones around his true self.

"I just..." Remus said, catching the attention of everyone. "Want Sirius to know...how much _I_ care about him and how I truly want the best for him because it's no less than what he deserves."

Remus's eyes turned on Sirius.

"I understand now, what you think," he said. "I don't mean to make you feel bad about yourself in any way. I just wish you would have come to talk to me earlier. Sirius, truly, I am a good listener. I care about you."

"Sirius, Remus is right," Peter said. "We are here for you and you can't keep closing everyone off like that. We—that hurts _us,_ too. We can't help you if you won't let us."

Sirius looked down at the hands folded in his lap. James didn't need to give a sentimental speech, he knew his other two friends got to Sirius in the way he would want and they did it better than he could ever.

"I know," Sirius said, his voice was barely above a whisper.

Remus sat back and the witch just watched them work out their own problems. When no one spoke up, she took the liberty to do so:

"I don't believe Sirius Black is the only one whom you all want to confront."

Sirius seemed to relax as the topic eased off him and on to someone else. He turned to James as did everyone else but in a subtle manner. James shrugged and folded his arms over his chest as if he wasn't bothered and he could with out with a flippant attitude.

"See? I don't even know where to begin. I feel...like there's so much to talk about," Remus said.

"You probably could have worded that better," James said a little bitterly. "Because what does that supposed to mean?"

"I think you, James, are way to dependent on someone to build you're entire...persona," Remus started slowly, trusting his tongue to make the words sound right. "I think you need to realize that your happiness and you as yourself should not depend on a girl."

"If you're talking about Evans—"

"He is," Sirius said, taking a deep breath.

Remus blinked in surprise. He didn't expect Sirius to talk this time round since it _was_ difficult to confront one's friends with a complaint but Sirius was not holding back and James looked just as surprised as Peter and Remus did.

"You're happiness should not ride on what Evans thinks of you because every bloody—sorry—time she cuts you down, you fall to pieces and I have to be the one to pick you back up even though I shouldn't because you can't keep basing yourself off everything about Evans."

James blinked, looking taken aback.

"You know, mate?" Sirius asked, knitting his eyebrows in confusion.

James shrugged.

"It's—yeah," James said, deflating. "Complicated but I get it and if you know I do then that's all that matters."

"Don't hold back now," Peter protested. "We might as well get everything out while we're at it."

James inhaled, looking at Peter deeply, trying to send a message through telepathy, knowing full well it would never work.

"Okay," James said. "As stupid as it sounds, Evans is my idol and I look up to her. She's kind-hearted, smart, witty, and all around a good person with good intentions and high morals. I am attracted to that for some reason. She truly will never cease to amaze me."

He paused when everyone was silent.

"I'll work on it but idolize her. There's no simple way around the simple fact."

Genevieve raised an eyebrow at the other three.

"I have nothing to say upon the matter," Remus said with his hands up.

"Nor do I," Sirius chimed in with a nod.

"Okay," Peter said and shrugged. "We aren't going to argue who your own idol is."

James sat back and slowly wiped his palms on his knees, finding it extremely hard to get so personal with his friends on all of his flaws and weaknesses. It was...harder than he would have ever expected and something he did not want to endure again.

"We all have flaws," Peter began. "And I think it's good someone else is helping you see them."

"Is that an invitation to start harping on you?" Sirius asked in a very blunt way. "Because I swear I have something to tell you and you need to hear it whether you want to or not."

Peter shrugged.

"I already know my flaws. I don't mind having someone else acknowledging them."

Remus raised an eyebrow at his new audacity but he didn't dare comment on it because he knew Peter and confidence rarely came cross together and that's when he started talking.

"Peter, you are more than what we all give you credit for and I am sorry we always pass over you because I for sure do not mean to do it. I think you just as valuable of a friend as those other two, you hear? I just wish you would have spoken up."

"I—what Remus said," James said. "I think you have huge potential and great worth but you need to stand up for yourself. I am embarraased that you have to stand up to me—your own friend—but if that's a good place to start, I say yell at me as much as you want, Peter."

"Whenever I do try to tell you, you brush it off," Peter said dryly.

He was in a no-nonsense mood and bring shamelessly blunt; it proved to be an effective tactic because his friends were forced to confront him and he was able to counter with ease—to finally be able to get it off his chest.

"I'm sorry," James said, hazel eyes wide with despair behind those black framed glasses. "I didn't mean it."

"I know you didn't, James. That is why I still stuck with you," Peter snorted.

Sirius remained silent in this part because James and Remus had done his job of talking for him. It would have been ireelevant if his message was simlly repetition, parroting what his friends just said.

"Me, too," Peter," Remus said, blue eyes meeting blue eyes. "I'm sorry, I appreciate you so much and I'm shite at showing it but I vow to you that I am. I appreciate you more than I appreciate myself."

"I know," Peter said. "But it's high time you start seeing your self-worth. You are worthy, Remus, and I can't prove it to you when you won't accept it."

Remus looked rather impressively impassive for someone who wanted to melt away from the conversation. He nodded, deciding he would get it over with by just agreeing with everything they were saying.

"I will," he said.

"Do you mean that?" James asked. "I mean, really?"

Remus shrugged and answered as truthfully as he could.

"Give me time and I am sure I will."

By the end of the session, the room felt different. At first, it was crackling with tension but now they were leaving with a better understanding of themselves and of each other. That was more than they could ask for because now they were at ease with one another again.

"Thank you," Sirius said earnestly to Genevieve. "You helped me get my friends back and well...my life back."

The other three chorused their thank you's and waved goodbye as Genevieve stepped into thr Floo and disappeared in emerald flames.

When she had left, Professor Dumbledore came forth with Professor McGonagall at his heels. The two looked at the four, evidently waiting for them to say something first.

"It helped," James said, looking at his friends. "Loads."

"And truly," Remus chimed in.

Sirius and Peter looked at each other as if the fight never happened and Remus and James finished each other's sentences as if they hadn't seen each other at their worst. They confronted their friends about their problems and they learned to resolve things with words.

Remus, who would have just opted to shut everyone out, opened up.

Peter, who would have just opted to fall silent, spoke up.

Sirius, who would have just opted to brush it off, sobered up.

James, who would have just opted to feign caring, listened up.

All in all, The Marauders, who were quite the mix, wised up.

* * *

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: Thank you! I am super glad you enjoyed reading it this time round. I bet you're really good at finding symbolism and everything, which is awesome!**

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 **In fact, I hope life is going well for all of you.**


	28. XXVIII: A Heart-to-Heart

**The infamous—All rights remain.**

"I don't want to burn bridges," Remus said quietly.

Remus and Lily walked down the corridors, patrolling them with a semi-cautious eye but they were mostly preoccupied on their conversation. This was the first patrol they went on where they were walking down the same hall.

"I'm sorry for everything I've done, especially on New Year's," Lily whispered. "I didn't mean any of it and I was only thinking of myself."

Remus looked into those striking green eyes and watched sincerity reflect deeply in those emerald pools. He wondered what exactly this enigma was thinking but he remembered he had no right to pry.

"Okay," he finally replied with little to no eloquence in his answer.

Lily looked confused, eyebrows knit in questioning.

"That's all I've got to say," Remus said with a little shrug. "I—what's happened is what happened. There's nothing more you can do about it. But may I point out the immense struggle we've gone through ever since that occurred?"

"I never meant it to be a struggle," Lily said and closed her eyes against the pain. "I truly didn't mean for it to go that far. Please, Remus, I wasn't thinking—"

"That was evident," Remus muttered. "What hurts the most was being so close—"

"What do you mean?" Lily asked, a bit fearful. "We _are_ still close, Remus. We are. We can be if you allow it."

"My trust," Remus said.

And knowing she did not mean it, Remus did not blame her entirely for that large gap of trust he once had in Lily but now it was hard to force that smile on his face whenever he saw her friends or her.

Lily's eyes lowered, tears in her eyes as she pursed her lips and bowed her head. She let her fiery red hair fall in front of her face as she covered her mouth with her hands.

But Remus was one of his word. He said he didn't want to burn bridges, which meant he would be willing to make amends because that was simply who he was. Remus Lupin, one who was a gentle soul. Always a gentle soul.

"I'm willing to forgive you," Remus stated in a softer tone of voice. "I am capable of doing so. I just hope we can start anew because we can never go back. Do you understand?"

Lily nodded silently, making the werewolf sigh with a dismal shake of his head. He patted her shoulder and left, feeling like he was just talking to a stranger. It left a sense of painful comfort.

Lily watched Remus walk away when she had so much to say. It left the pain in her chest stabbing through her sternum like a blade on fire—digging through her, determined to make its mark. She closed his eyes and turned away as she, too, walked away, only in the opposite direction, not even caring about her patrol for the night—deciding she was calling it a night.

Remus listened with his enhanced hearing as she walked away until her footsteps were nothing but echoes before he flung his head back and threw his hands over his face with an audible groan. While he truly could not get over the smoldered trust, he could not handle this different kind of heartache he was enduring.

"I'm sorry, Lily," Remus said to the air.

* * *

James was wide awake and sitting up in his bed, trying to finish his essay for Professor McGonagall early because he knew it would never get done any other time than right now. His mind was full of different ideas, which made this essay rather easy to write, but he knew it would die down once he let his mind travel back to his personal thoughts.

He looked over at Sirius and scrutinized the other. Sirius, too, was up but he was working on something else. The Black heir was on his bed, trying to draw something or another. Sirius was no artist so whatever he was drawing must have been simple.

"Do you think we'll be all right against Hufflepuff tomorrow?" James asked suddenly, that realization dawning on him.

"I think we've practiced enough and are doing well enough despite your words otherwise," Sirius answered fairly, not looking up from his work.

"Well, from what I saw at practice I should make me a hell of a load more nervous," James said offhandedly but he kept his tone polite. "But I assume it was one of those 'off' days."

"Well, we wouldn't have been doing so bad if our Quidditch Captain wasn't jumping down our throats. Would have made practice a helluva load easier," Sirius shot back quickly, his sharp tongue quick.

"I wouldn't have to be jumping down your lot's throats if you all play like you actually want to win," James said with a roll of his eyes.

"Why are you even Captain if you don't believe in your own team?" Sirius inquired calmly.

"I do believe in my team, which was why I was disappointed. I knew you could do better—everyone," James said sternly.

Sirius almost faltered at the comment but he was good at keeping his composure. It was what he was taught to do at a very young age.

"Well," the Black heir said. "I think...you need to tell your team that. I think they would like to hear that because they're all feeling a bit hurt, mate."

"I didn't mean to hurt anyone," James said in a gentler tone. "I just want them to know what they are capable of."

Sirius tried to warn James just how angry and hurt the team was but he would figure that out at the next practice.

* * *

A few minutes later, Lily and Severus were walking across the castle courtyard in a debate that was carried in hasty and swift voices.

"Lily please, I thought we were supposed to be friends?" Severus said. "Best friends?"

"We are, Sev, but I don't like some of the people you're hanging round with! I'm sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he's creepy! D'you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?"

Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, sallow face.

"That was nothing," Severus reassured. "It was a laugh, that's all—"

"It was Dark Magic, and if you think that's funny—"

"What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?" Severus demanded. His color rose again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

"What's Potter got to do with anything?" Lily asked.

"They sneak out at night. There's something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?"

"He's ill," Lily said then corrected herself. "They say he's ill."

"Every month at the full moon?" Severus asked.

"I know your theory," Lily said and she sounded cold. "Why are you so obsessed with them anyway? Why do you care what they're doing at night?"

"I'm just trying to show you they're not as wonderful as everyone seems they are."

The intensity of his gaze made her blush.

"They don't use Dark Magic, though." She dropped her voice. "And you're being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went sneaking down that tunnel by the Whomping Willow, and James Potter saved you from whatever's down there—"

Snape's whole face contorted and he spluttered, "Saved? Saved? You think he was playing the hero? He was saving his neck and his friends' too! You're not going to—I won't let you—"

" _Let_ me? _Let_ me?"

Lily's bright green eyes were slits. Snape backtracked at once.

"I didn't mean—I just don't want to see you made a fool of—he fancies you, James Potter fancies you!" The words seemed wrenched from him against his will. "And he's not...everyone thinks...big Quidditch hero—" Snape's bitterness and dislike were rendering him incoherent, and Lily's eyebrows were traveling farther and farther up her forehead.

"I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag," she said, cutting across Snape. "I don't need you to tell me that. But Mulciber's and Avery's idea of humor is just evil. _Evil,_ Sev. I don't understand how you can be friends with them.

Snape had seemed to occlude all else as soon as Lily insulted James. He seemed to cling to those rude words directed meaningfully at the person he truly hated the most at Hogwarts because as he and Lily started walking once more, there was life in his eyes and a definite boubce and spring in his step.

* * *

James blew his whistle again, shaking his head and waving the team over. He had no idea what was going through their heads as they practiced. If possible, they were worse than last time.

The whistle resounded once more, echoing like a delayed grenade and everyone was waiting for the explosion to go off. It was nerve-racking and James temporarily forgot Sirius's words.

James opened his mouth to start criticizing but one look of Sirius's meaningful expression had him backtracking and trying a completely new route.

"I know you're going to start complaining about our lack of skills and whatever, James," Harley said as he skidded to a halt before James. "You tell us every practice."

James felt his heart clench at that because ouch, that hurt.

"I don't mean to be so hard on you lot," he admitted softly. "I don't. I know I have been the worst Captain Gryffindor has ever seen."

No one stopped him, which truly showed just how horrible James had been treating everyone.

"But I believe in this team—I know you can do better so why aren't we acting like it?"

This was like a backhanded compliment and that did not make anything better. In fact, it made things possibly worse. The entire team scowled at him as they hovered over the ground.

"Okay," James said, pointing to the stands. "Everyone over there now."

The team grumbled as they all flew towards the stands, wondering what on Earth James was up to now. James, however, was not saying anything until they were all seated before him. The bespectacled Gryffindor looked at them all before sitting on the ledge with his broom in his hand.

"Let's talk," James said simply. "I don't like how we all feel like strangers."

"We basically are," Oliver pointed out.

"No," James said with a shake of his head. "But we're pretending that we are. I want us to open up to each other. I want us to feel comfortable around one another."

"By what? Have a heart-to-heart?" Vitani asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Exactly that," James said with a snap of his fingers. "This is going to be our extended practice, you lot. We are going to talk."

"What's the point?" Harley asked, leaning back on Oliver's legs.

"We just went over why," James said, leaning on Jacqui's legs and looking up at her. "Hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," Jacqui said with a fond roll of her eyes. She leaned down and pecked on the lips. "All right, so James is right. I am extremely fond of all of you. You're family—we're Gryffindors and proud to be!"

There was a roar of approval at those choice of words and James winked up at her. Jacqui flashed a grin in return, a silent answer that meant: _We can make this work._

"That's the spirit," he said, catching on.

Jacqui giggled and leaned back on her hands as she looked up and around at everyone as James hummed thoughtfully. However, the rest of the group fell silent as no one had anything to say.

"I'll go," James decided, making a grand gesture to go with it, "since none of you will."

The Gryffindor Quidditch Captain cleared his throat as he straightened up the best he could while still leaning against her legs.

"I—James Cicerio Potter—would love to say how lucky I truly am to have you all here today and what a great team we're going to be—"

"James—my teeth are rotting at the sweetness," Vitani deadpanned as she pulled her hair over one shoulder. "Seriously."

"Yeah, seriously," Sirius said, shooting Vitani, his good friend, a knowing grin.

James threw back his head and laughed, arching off a bit from Vitani's legs as he cachinnated. The laughter seemed to lessen the awkward and unexplainable tension in the air as people started to ease up.

"Okay, fine, I love Quidditch and I love bragging about how we won. But I love bragging about how close-knit we are."

"See?" Grason said with a hearty laugh. "That sounds purely James Potter. Raw and unfiltered."

"I dunno if that can be a good, bad, or both kind of thing," James said, grinning as he quirked an eyebrow. "How about you tell me something about yourself?"

"I actually love my name," Grason said with a smile. "Like...I love it. I really hate tense friendships and whatnot—I'm bad at that."

"Good to know," James said, gesturing to Grason. "And that's why he isn't being his best Chaser-self. He hates how tense this team is."

"In a shortened version, yeah," Grason said helpfully. "That's a good way to put it."

"See?" James said excitedly, clapping his hands together then gesturing to the team as one.

"See what?" Harley asked, raising an eyebrow, finding James's actions to be a bit strange.

"We're _bonding_ ," he said, laughing. "We're being honest with each other, which is exactly what I want from each and every one of you. I want us to be able to feel comfortable being honest."

"Without being rude," Jacqui added pointedly, pinning James with a knowing expression, eyebrow raised and lips pursed.

James threw his hands up but he got the message regardless. He had learned from that impromptu-ish therapy session with the witch who actually helped, that talking improved tension.

"Great, I want to say something," Vitani said, standing up and clearing her throat. She raised her arms up to get everyone's attention, though everyone's attention was already on her. "I would like to say Quidditch has been my life and this is my last year here. I don't want to remember my last team year as some team who could barely work together."

The crowd grumbled but good naturedly.

"So," she said, stamping her foot then using jazz hands. "I want us to have a good year. You're family-Gryffindors and all! So, let's make this work."

The team cheered and clapped, laughing along as Vitani bowed and bowed again, waving to the team as if she were waving to the crowd as a queen. Sirius laughed heartily and tugged Vitani by the hand, pressing his lips to her cheek.

The crew continued to talk until the night grew dark and when the stars were out, they simply lit their wands and talked some more, not breaking their conversation.

James learned Harley was actually suffering from depression and was using Quidditch as an outlit to help him cope and recover. James ensured that they would be much better by tomorrow and not just performance-wise.

James learned Vitani was struggling with an eating disorder but she was doing much better; James also learned one of Vitani's new and closest friends was none other than Sirius Black.

"Oh," Sirius said, pretending to sound flattered but really truly was. "You're just saying that."

"I wish," Vitani snorted then swooped down to peck Sirius right on the lips. "Kidding, you are a great friend. You are annoying at times but great nonetheless because no one's perfect."

Oliver just recently lost his father to illness. His story had sent most of them in tears but through and through, they were feeling better, feeling more comfortable around each other, trusting one another.

The Gryffindor Quidditch Team started packing things up and mounting their broomsticks by the time it was 11:00 PM and Professor McGonagall was probably screeching her lungs out wondering where they were and demanding to know details.

"Wonder what Moony and Wormtail are doing," James said as he hovered beside Sirius.

"Good question..." Sirius said, looking at the lights from the castle.

* * *

"Damn you, Wormtail!" Remus shouted, rising to his feet.

He and Peter were playing a good game of Go Fish, a muggle game Remus had showed them, and he was losing horrendously. The poor bloke was now on his feet, throwing his cards down in exasperation.

"It's always the ruddy diamonds that I can never find!" Remus exclaimed, running a hand through his hair. "Where are Padfoot and Prongs? I am getting sick of waiting for them."

"No, you're just sick of losing, Moony," Peter snickered good naturedly, grinning up at his scowling friend.

"Shut up, Wormtail," Remus said, trying to add some force in his words but there was no venom in his tone. "But seriously, where are the prats? The Common Room has been eerily silent without them and the team hanging round here."

"No, just filled with first years," Peter jested, looking at the few groups of first years, who sometimes could not help but stare wide-eyed at the two older students.

"It's like they've never seen fifteen year olds," Remus snorted, sitting back down and picking up his cards. "This is a shite game, Wormy, I don't like it."

"Mate, you introduced it to me, remember?" Peter said through his fit of laughter. He packed away his cards and set them on the table, leaning back to look at Remus.

"So," Remus said slowly as if trying to draw out the subject. "Now what? We just sit and wait, twiddling our thumbs until one of them shows up?"

"They're all likely to show up together" Peter pointed out rather unhelpfully but yawned. "I'm not staying up. What was that wand motion for the Silencing Charm?"

Peter did some kind of motion in the air, hoping he was somewhat close.

"Sure, just at the end, don't—flourish your wand so," Remus said, showing Peter the proper way. *like that."

"Got it, thanks," Peter said, standing up. "I'll see you tomorrow morning, of course."

Remus waved good night and soon found himself curling up in the chair he sat in, drawing his knees to his chest and resting his cheek on his knees, closing his eyes.

He hardly got a wink's sleep before he was gently being shaken awake. Remus huffed agitatedly before opening his eyes and glaring at whomever disturbed his peaceful slumber. As he blinked the bleariness from his eyes, he found himself staring at James Potter...and his reflection in James's glasses.

"What time did you get back?" Remus croaked, trying to stare at his wristwatch. "How did you lot stay out there? It's January!"

"Loads of Warming Charms," James said with a nod. "All right, should we all head up?"

Remus nodded sleepily, letting James and Sirius lead the way. Both Frank and Peter were in bed, casting those Silencing Charms so as not to be disturbed.

For once, a true rarity in itself, Remus was able to lie down in a peaceful state of mind.

* * *

 **...Sorry for the gap of no updates.**

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	29. XXIX: Be My Valentine Heart (Cliche)

**All rights remain.**

"This happens every year."

"And for the past four years..."

"We have been celebrating this holiday..."

"Together!"

Remus was seriously struggling not to break his quill tip into his parchment then set his parchment on fire. He wished that day would just vanish. He was seriously contemplating on whether to lock himself in a broom closet for the entire day and sit in there and camp out.

Alas, his plan was shot to shite when Peter pointed out they found him in a broom closet last time and being found in one on that day would make for some interesting news for the grapevine—news Remus did not want to go into any more detail about.

"Come on, you make it bad for yourself," James said with a hefty sigh, one that was far too dramatic and theatrical to be real and sincere. "You know you secretly love this holiday more than anything."

Remus, however, was not impressed for he turned a cold shoulder to James, solidifying his claim for his hatred for that day.

Now, they were required to call it "That Day" because Remus had forbid that word with the only exception being the actual date. He even wrote it down on the Official Rules List. Neither James nor Sirius are permitted to say "Valentine's Day" except on Valentine's Day. They did not abide by this rule at all.

No surprise there.

Remus just wanted a peaceful February 14th but with friends like James and Sirius, there was no such thing as a peaceful February 14th—in fact, there was no such thing as a peaceful day period.

Remus was contemplating on how to get away for the day; he was even considering skiving off his classes to avoid this day but he was afraid of the wrath of the professors, especially Professor McGonagall. She would be livid for skipping class when not sick.

He was going to hide in the Boathouse because no one went there during the winter, which made for a perfect place to hide out. It was either the Boathouse of the broom closet. He was leaning towards the broom corset until Peter kindly pointed out he was found there last year.

Remus, at first, wanted to say he didn't care but Peter pointed out again what would occur if he were found in a broom closet on That Day. Peter actually pointed that out multiple times, which made groan and cut off the rest of Peter's lecture.

As he was collaborating with his own plans, his eyes began to close slowly until...he woke up with a jolt and waking up to this:

* * *

"Get out of my bed, Prongs!"

"Hand me my slacks!"

"Give me my shirt!"

Remus cracked an eye open, eyebrows knitting in confusion and questioning moments later. He slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and looked to his left to see what his friends were up to now.

Sirius was scrambling around without a shirt and James was struggling to buckle his belt. The whole scene was a bit ridiculous but amusing nonetheless. Remus watched the entire ordeal with a shake of his head, getting his things and going to get ready himself.

When he returned, he saw James and Sirius on Sirius's bed dressed and ready for the day. Remus came forth and shook the water from his hair.

"Are you ready? I am so hungry," James said, perking up and moving off of Sirius's bed. "I heard the Great Hall is serving buttermilk pancakes."

"So much excitement," Remus joked then moved towards the door, opening it and looking back at his three friends. "Ready?"

The answer was three friends stampeding down the stairs and through the Common Room, nearly bowling into a group of first years, who all scrambled out of the way for the older students anyway.

"Sorry!" Remus called over his shoulder he closed the portrait door shut behind him.

"Happy Valentine's Day!" Sirius chimed to the Fat Lady as he ran down the flight of stairs, jumping over the trick step.

The four of them finally stopped running when they reached the ground level; they slowed to a walk until they were stopped by a couple of Ravenclaw girls.

Now, Remus did love Ravenclaw because he originally wanted to be sorted into the blue and silver House. The girls stopped in front of all four of them and Remus was standing before a girl with wicked gorgeous eyes, gray eyes he decided, and red hair plaited over one shoulder.

The girl blushed as she held out a red card. Remus smiled as he looked down at it; there a faint splash of freckles on her nose just below her eyes. He took the card and smiled as he read it.

"Thanks," he said, "Charlotte, do you think you could do me a favor?"

Charlotte looked at him considerably and put a hand on his shoulder, leaning up to nod. Remus leaned forward and whispered in her ear; pulling back, he waited to see her reaction.

"Sure," Charlotte said brightly, taking her hand in his. "Ready?"

James's, Peter's, and Sirius's jaw dropped as Remus walked away with Charlotte, their eyes widening in surprise. It was a good thing Remus's back was turned to them because he was laughing with Charlotte over their reaction.

"Okay, so who are we making jealous?" Charlotte asked, raising a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at him.

Charlotte and Remus entered the Great Hall and the Gryffindor subtly tilted his chin up at Bernie Wells. To say the least, he knew this was a bit cruel but if this worked, he would be helping his friend.

Remus remembered the conversation he had with Bernie Wells about Charlotte and how the bloke fancied her but was too afraid to say something. Remus remembered promising Bernie he would get them together but in light of recent events, he had been a bit distracted but what better way or time than this and on Valentine's Day?

"Trust me, it almost always works," Remus said with a wave of his other hand, remembering how he had done this many a times. "Just pretend like you're enjoying hanging out with me."

Charlotte smiled brightly as she walked right to the Ravenclaw table and pulled Remus down beside her. It was not like a Slytherin inviting a Gryffindor or vise versa but it was still a bit odd despite the newcomer being Remus Lupin, one of the brightest at Hogwarts. Even Remus, himself, was a little surprised that he was finding himself sitting at another House's table.

Bernie was eyeing Remus evenly but the little twitch in his hands and the pursed lips betrayed his true emotions. Remus tried not to look at the betrayed and hurt expression Bernie wore, reminding himself he was not pursuing Charlotte and was merely helping another.

"Remus," Charlotte suddenly hissed. "He's staring."

Remus did not turn back because that would have been more suspicious but he interlocked their fingers and leaned in closer and spoke close to her ear.

"Laugh," he said softly.

Charlotte giggled loud enough for Bernie to hear and Remus responded further by angling himself so he was blocking Bernie's view of them. Little did Remus know, Bernie Wells was silently seething.

Charlotte and Remus found it easy to slip into a casual conversation about this, that, and the other thing. It was all fine and dandy before Charlotte grabbed his hand and kicked him under the table when his first reaction was to slip out of her grasp.

Bernie was gripping his fork tightly while his friend was trying to talk to him. However, Bernie did not appear to be listening—merely watching—or glaring—at Remus and Charlotte.

"If I am decapitated, you owe me," Remus said with a little chuckle.

"He won't do anything but sit and glare," Charlotte said dismally. "He's too Bernie to do anything."

"Watch this," Remus said and stood up. He took Charlotte's hand once more and led her into the corridors where he pointedly nodded at Bernie before exiting. He kept a sharp eye on the other, secretly watching as Bernie excused himself from the table and following at a slow pace behind.

Charlotte raised an eyebrow once more but Remus held up his hands and started counting down from ten silently, putting a finger down for each second.

"Six, five, four—"

"Remus!"

Remus and Charlotte turned around as Bernie came walking up to them. Bernie threw Charlotte an apologetic smile before taking Remus by the wrist and dragging him away.

"You said you didn't fancy her!" Bernie insisted as soon as they rounded the corner. He looked irritated and hurt as he stood there, demanding for a warranted answer from Remus.

Little did he know Charlotte was right there.

"Well, I don't," Remus said plainly, shrugging a shoulder and speaking in a bored tone. "And if you would stop doubting yourself, you might realize I think Charlotte has her own voice in the matter."

"She doesn't fancy me," Bernie said stubbornly, crossing his arms over his chest. He narrowed his eyes at Remus with a heavy scowl, probably wondering what the other could say for a good explanation.

"Don't speak on her behalf," Remus said crossly but he still remained much more mild than Bernie.

"Bernie?" Charlotte said, unable to help herself as she stepped round the corner.

"Au revoir!" Remus said in perfect French, seeing as he was fluent in it. "De rien!"

Remus made his way back to the Great Hall, walking to sit at his own House table and right beside James, Sirius, and Peter. His friends' eyes were sparking impishly, digging for details.

"Done playing Cupid for the day?" James asked, leaning his elbows on the table and putting his chin in his hands. "Because I have a job for you."

"Never liked the sounds of that," Remus said but shrugged a shoulder anyway. "Depending on what it is..."

"I need your help teaching me how to woo such a lovely flower," James said poetically. He looked at Remus then subtly turned his head in Lily's direction; his hazel eyes did soften considerably.

"I cannot believe you, Prongs. After everything you're still after her?" Remus scoffed in disbelief. He could not understand nor fathom what went on in James's head but he noted the hint of sincerity in the other's tone.

"Love is love," James said in return, smirking as he did so.

"L'Amour c'est L'Amour," Remus sighed and shrugged. "I can't teach you how to get her but I can teach you how to be nice."

James raised an eyebrow.

"I won't speak on behalf of her but she hates your attitude, mate," Remus deadpanned with the straightest face possible. "Don't be hurt if she does not respond the way you want her to."

Sirius groaned teasingly and bared his teeth in a grin as he stood up and straightened his tie. He slammed a hand on the table and leaned down to address his friends in a theatrical way.

"I will be skiving off classes today," he said. "And finding a girl who'd be willing to spend the day with me. None of that cliché stuff."

"You really like bragging about that, hm?" Remus said, looking unimpressed. "You like have those secret rendezvouses?"

"Absolutely," Sirius said with an even glare. "Sneaking off to abandoned classrooms..."

Remus rolled his eyes and went back to reading his book, losing interest in the conversation rather quickly.

By the time breakfast was over and students were filing to their morning classes or free periods, Sirius was already gone with a girl in tow and James, Peter, and Remus were making their way to Herbology.

* * *

Sirius was heading down a rather empty corridor, far off from the main one, with Danae Greengrass. Now, he was not a big fan of the Greengrass family but he picked up an eager and willing one so he was not complaining too much.

Danae was a very stuck-up girl who did nothing but sit around and gossip with her friends like a group of canaries. Sirius turned to look at the girl, making sure that it was completely empty before turning to speak with her.

"Oi, Danae, why are you skiving off class?" Sirius asked firstly.

"Why are _you_?" Danae shot back smoothly, fixing her green and silver tie in a drawling sort of manner.

"I'm Sirius Black," Sirius said as if that explained everything in a warranted way.

"Good answer," Danae said, almost sarcastically.

"How's your family been? The mighty Greengrass family?" Sirius said, half genuine and half not.

The Greengrass family and the Malfoy family were both very close behind his family when it came to matching wealth and power. The Malfoy was as powerful as the Black family but the Greengrass family was as wealthy. The Weasley family was considered a joke, the Prewett family was too nice to be pure-blood. The Longbottom family was hardly ever considered a pure-blood family. The Potter family was powerful and wealthy but simply too nice. It was mostly the Greengrasses, the Malfoys, and the Blacks that were at the top.

"My family's been going mad since Zabini was able to slip out of his marriage contract," Danae said truthfully, shaking her head. "If that bloke ever does have, he was bragging about the name 'Blaise'."

Danae spoke as if she hated the Zabinis. Sirius was no fan of them but he kept that to himself as well.

"So—who was stuck in that marriage contract with Zabini?" Sirius asked, now very curious because he could not help it.

"No clue," Danae said, sounding bored of this topic. "But what about you, Sirius Black? How is the notorious Black family coming along?"

"Dame Walburga is splendid and Sire Orion is spiffing," Sirius said in a mock posh demeanor. Despite his jesting tone, there was most definitely a hint of bitterness in his voice.

"Still at odds with them?" Danae guessed, folding her arms over her chest and fixing Sirius with her piercing blue gaze.

"That obvious?" Sirius said, his tone dripping with obvious sarcasm. "Or did Reg run his mouth again bragging about how he was the divine son?"

"Probably a bit of both," Danae said truthfully. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she spoke, looking quite uncomfortable with the fact Sirius was so comfortable and at ease.

"Always crossed my mind," Sirius said with a shrug. "No surprises there."

"Why are you so against it?" Danae finally blurted out. "Why are you so against what your parents believe in? Is this some sort of rebellious streak?"

"I guarantee it has more to do than being rebellious, Danae. This is just pure dislike for their views on people. It's just pure opposition to oppression," Sirius said a bit harshly, annoyed Danae still thought those views were moral.

Danae opted to stay silent but she was Danae Greengrass. She did not know when to hold her tongue.

"But if you—"

"—I am most certainly not discussing morality with you," Sirius interjected at once, placing a hand on either side of her lithe waist. "I am Sirius Black—one of no morality."

"Now I know that's a lie," Danae said, putting her hands over his. "I have seen your good intentions before."

"Really?" Sirius said, looking genuinely curious and almost vulnerable. "That's not something I hear everyday."

"Rebel, you may be, but a good man at that," Danae said a bit quieter this time. She took her hands off his and pulled her hair over to one side and over her shoulder. "My teeth are rotting at my sweet words but damn it, Sirius, I mean it."

"Blimey, I almost feel flattered," Sirius jested. He, instead, put a leg between hers and leaned in closer. "Was that a compliment?"

"Yes," Danae said, setting her jaw in response. "Answer me and give me a warranted one at that. Why do you disregard every human emotion?"

Sirius did pause at that question, wondering more so why she was asking it rather than answering it. He frowned but not in agitation, more like thoughtfulness.

"You are...less vulnerable when you don't let others impact you."

To Sirius, that was a reasonable and warranted answer.

"So lying and pretending like you are invincible makes it easier right?" Danae asked, her tone almost challenging.

"It does," Sirius insisted. "Now don't you have a reputation to uphold?"

"What is that reputation?" Danae said with a smirk, back to her usual spite fire self.

"You know the answer to that," Sirius said with a roll of his eyes.

"I don't," Danae said teasingly before pulling Sirius close by his tie. "Show me."

Sirius obliged very willingly.

* * *

"Was that prat being legit?" Remus said in disbelief as his first class was dismissed.

He, James, and Peter were walking out of Herbology...without Sirius.

"This is Padfoot we are talking about. He is very legit when it comes to this sort of shite," James said with a snort. "A galleon that they didn't talk for more than fifteen minutes."

"A galleon to say he initiated it!" Peter chimed in.

"All or nothing to say he was with no random girl," Remus said, deciding to pool in some of his own money.

"Whoa, whoa, time out!" James said, readjusting the Messenger bag's strap on his shoulder. "Is Moony here actually participating willingly in a bet?"

"Yes I am," Remus said with the most arrogant tone he could pull off. "Is that a problem?"

"No," James and Peter chorused. "Hey, do people ask you if you and Padfoot are ever seeing each other? People ask me that."

"Ask you if Padfoot and I are seeing each other. That's strange," Remus said, uninterested. He had heard this over and over again, it was getting old. "No, people fail to understand the difference between friends and lovers even though the two are not hard to distinguish."

"Why do you let the rumors go on then?" James pressed curiously, eyeing his friend from the corner of his peripheral vision.

"It's pointless to stop them because no one will believe you anyway," Remus said casually with a shrug.

.oOo.

History of Magic was as bad as Remus predicted and he didn't use any Divination to predict that. He was sitting in the back of class more toward the door and letting the sun soak him in warmth.

He was taking notes or attempting to as he listened and fought off sleep all at once. His mind kept telling him to close his eyes and give into rest. His hand stopped moving across the parchment as his eyes dropped closed but he instantly jolted himself awake.

Remus put his head in his hand and continued to write whatever he heard. His mind was going lethargic once more as his eyes dropped shut.

Now that his eyes were closed, his enhanced hearing on hyper alert, hearing and listening to everything. All he could hear was the slow breathing of every other student who had fallen asleep. And soon, he joined them.

When he opened his eyes, they first went to his watch, looking at the time. It was late but not too late. He had only been asleep for fifteen minutes when he thought he had been asleep for longer.

"Psst," Remus hissed, nudging James with his foot. "Prongs!"

James groaned and stirred; through his bleariness, he glared at Remus.

"There better be a legit reason for waking me up," he said groggily and in an agitated tone.

Remus rolled his eyes but he never got to finish because Professor McGonagall came barging into the room, startling every student awake. Peter jolted almost out of his seat.

"Professor Binns, may I please speak with Stebbins for a moment?"

"Yes, Professor," came a monotonous voice.

James was righting the glasses on his nose by the time Professor McGonagall walked past their desk, narrowing her eyes at them, noticing how there were only three of them.

"See?" Remus hissed under his breath. "I knew she'd be peeved off since we let Padfoot skive."

"For the record, in my defense, I am not Padfoot's keeper. I cannot force him to go to class," James said, throwing his hands up before putting his head back down. "Now good night."

Remus huffed in irritation but he went back to his notes once again feeling his Prefect Badge heavy on his cloak.

* * *

Sirius was breathless for some time but now he was putting his shirt back on and redoing his tie. He tilted his chin up to make the task easier then turned to Danae to see her buttoning her shirt and slipping her shoes back on.

"I need to shower after this real soon," Danae muttered, smoothing down her shirt.

"But you have to admit," Sirius said with a bit of a smirk. "That wad amazing, right?"

"You're like a god," Danae said, half-sarcastically. "Anything else I can say to boost your ego?"

Sirius just sat back, rubbing a hand over his abdomen absentmindedly before he shrugged. "I dunno, I don't think so."

Danae merely rolled her eyes and looked around before stepping more so into view. She scurried down the hall and out of sight. Sirius did not feel anything but thr smallest, tiniest, little hint of a tug watching her go.

Was he beginning to realize his choice of unemotionally investing himself in girls was getting a bit lonely? No one could tell for his face was impassive or back to its usual smirk. When he rounded the corner and went down a flight of stairs, he found his friends.

"Look!" Sirius said happily, joining up with the other three. "What have I missed?"

"A boring lecture. A peeved off McGonagall..." Peter said in a bored and tired tone. "Blimey, Padfoot, bit unfair you got to play Hookie."

"No one was stopping you," Sirius pointed out with a bit of a shrug. "You could have, too."

Remus kept his gaze forward steadily, not saying anything; he kept the scowl off his expression as he quickened his pace. Remus, best mates or not, was not interested in hearing Sirius's stupid stories about the many girls he shagged.

"Oh ho," Sirius said, folding his arms and walking beside Remus. "You're just peeved off because I 'corrupted the good nature of the female' and all that shite, right, Moony?"

"Close," Remus said snarkily and turned his piercing blue gaze on Sirius. "My agitation is more aimed at your need to brag and boast about it."

Sirius licked his lips in thought before carding his fingers through his hair; he jumped in front of Remus, effectively blocking his path. He grabbed onto Remus's backpack strap and held him still by that.

"What?" Remus said more in annoyance.

"I knew her name. I have known her for a long time—before I met you lot, she wasn't a complete stranger," Sirius said as if he could read the werewolf's mind. "Her name is Danae Greengrass. She was in a marriage contract—with an Avery I think? I can't remember but anyway, it's like a thing."

Remus merely raised an eyebrow. "Interesting biography, now move so I can."

"Do you love me again?" Sirius pressed, still holding his place.

"Who said I stopped?" Remus said, playing along.

"I knew it!" Sirius crowed and pecked Remus's jaw.

The fifth year Gryffindor retaliated with an annoyed exclaim, wiping his jaw free of any Sirius or dog saliva.

"Never again," Remus muttered as he was allowed to walk once more.

'There's still time left in the day," James said with bew vigor. "I'm still in the game."

.oOo.

Lily was just trying to enjoy her time in the library alone when something came floating in and stopping right beside her eye level. It was not a red card, which made her wonder if this was an official note. Curiosity got the best of Lily as she took the card and opened it.

 _Lillies are white. Azaleas are blue,_

 _Funny thing is, I'm still in love with you._

 _Roses are red, tulips are pink,_

 _Lily Evans, you are all I ever think._

 _Daisies are yellow. Er—birds have wings,_

 _I'm running out of things to sing._

 _So, I've written this rhyme,_

 _To waste your time,_

 _But will you be mine?_

 _—James C. Potter_

Lily rolled her eyes.

Typical.

She put the little note on the desk but her eyes lingered on it for a little longer than she would have ever cared to admit.

"What d'you reckon, Evans?' James asked, walking into the library.

Lily just glared.

"Better than last year's?" James asked, biting his lip.

"Well, Potter," Lily said, putting her hands flat on the table. "It rhymes."

James flashed his teeth in a smile, a real one before it turned arrogant. But it mirrored the look Lily gave him; she, at first, looked at him different one that had not a trace of hatred before it flashed into a scowl.

"Goodbye, Potter," she said, collecting her things. "Cheers."

She shoved past him, pushing him away by the chest roughly as she stalked past him with his head tilted up.

* * *

Remus was, once again, there to pick James up. Sirius remained silent at first, not offering a word of comfort, but he soon gave in and went to sit over on James's bed. He sat cross legged beside his friend.

"Cheer up, Prongs," Sirius said soothingly. "I think she's starting to admire your determination to win her over. That's going to be something you two will talk about when you finally get together."

Remus smiled at Sirius, glad his friend had the sense to speak well.

"Good," Sirius said, slinging his arm around his best mate. "For now...while you are still young and single, buck up and have some fun. Try not to give yourself gray hair over her."

"Can we skive Divination tomorrow?" James asked, mostly to Sirius and Peter.

"I'm in," Peter said, nodding at the others.

"I'm in," Sirius chimed in.

There was a pause as all three heads turned to Remus.

"I'm in," Remus said finally.

The Marauders were able to get a pretty nice night of relaxation, just lounging at their own leisure until sleep took them all one by one.

* * *

 **Happy Valentine's Day!  
I tried waiting but it will be posted on the eve of the holiday, haha.**

 **NightVSlash985** : **I am really glad you're liking this version of Peter. I think he was beaten down at some point but he still had some fire in him at Hogwarts. How else did he stay friends with The Marauders? I think Peter was a strong character. He wasn't sorted into Gryffindor without a reason.**

 **xXFadingNightXx: I have yet to submit a Review on your story, _Questions and Answers_ , but I had to make sure you knew that here, too. Great job. You're a great writer. I hope everything gets better for you, too.**

 **KaiaRenkin: Go Fish can be such a brutal game of sheer frustration, haha. I love Go Fish though I haven't played it in ages. Do you like card games?**

 **Raven that flies at night: I know right! What are those Marauders planning or doing? Quiet can be bad when involving those pesky prats, eh?**

 **Moony1972: Missed you, Moony! It's great to hear from you! I hope golf is going well for you! Read her Marauders story! It's way better than this one, haha.**

 **SlytherinLegacie 338: I like your open honesty and quite honestly rely on it. In reality, I am quite blunt, which I rely on. So thank you for being honest, my friend!**

 **Guest(s): Thank you so much for your support. That means so much and I know it sounds cliche but I mean it, haha.**

 **I can't wait for the Eighth Harry Potter book coming out on July 31! Again, Happy Valentine's Day, guys!**


	30. XXX: Bad Moon Rising

**All rights remain.**

~ _Sirius wandered the Forest alone; there was no purpose to his walking, there was no reason to be alert, yet he felt as if he was being watched. It was an uncomfortable feeling but he continued to move around, look about._

 _Just as he was bending on a knee to pick something shiny up, there was a low growl emitting from the shadows. Sirius froze and looked at a pair of gleaming yellow eyes._

 _The eyes looked big, wide with malice, hungry. Sirius kept his eyes locked on the other pair, hardly caring to breathe loudly in fear of agitating the animal._

 _Sirius slowly stood up to his feet and narrow his eyes. The pair of yellow eyes vanished as the animal blinked but a body emerged, a body a huge dog, far more powerful than Sirius. Its fur gleamed silver in the moonlight but Sirius saw the white teeth flashing, ready to tear...~_

Sirius jolted awake from his own nightmare and looked around as if he was expecting a beast of great size to come forward and attack. He sighed with a breath of relief and looked around some more to get a general idea of where he was.

"Are you all right?" James asked.

"What? Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Sirius said in a sarcastically humored yet curious tone.

"No reason," Peter said then patted Sirius's bed railing. He rose to his feet and with the sound if a closing door, he disappeared saying, "I'll tell Pomfrey you're up."

"What?" Sirius said, now getting very confused. "What?"

James looked tight lipped as he sat there, trouble in his hazel eyes. That expression told Sirius everything or something went wrong but no one was telling him anything so all he could do was beg and plead someone inform him of what happened or why he was in a bed.

"Seriously, what the hell is going on?" Sirius demanded, sitting up.

That was a mistake for the room swam before his eyes as the floor threatened to meet him. He gripped the sheets tightly as he forced himself to bow his head and relaxing for a minute. From what he saw in that brief moment told him he was not somewhere familiar.

He looked up once he felt a bit better and saw he was in a hospital room.

But he was not in the Infirmary.

He was at St. Mungo's.

And he had very little recollection of what actually happened last night.

* * *

~LAST NIGHT~

Sirius, James, and Peter all crammed themselves underneath the Invisibility Cloak while Remus and Pomfrey headed out of the Hospital Wing. Remus, however, was holding himself differently. It almost looked like he was more alert, trying to appear taller than usual.

"Strange," James murmured, looking at his friends. "Think something's wrong with Moony?"

"Prongs, it's the full moon, what do you think?" Peter snorted.

The three of them hurried through the darkness to the Whomping Willow where they waited patiently for Pomfrey to say goodbye to Remus. They waited patiently as Remus immobilized the tree and headed towards the base of the trunk, disappearing.

As soon as Madam Pomfrey was out of sight, they threw the cloak off one another.

"Could barely breathe," Sirius grumbled.

"You were stepping on my foot, Wormtail," James complained.

"I had a mouthful of Padfoot's stupid hair," Peter said in his defense.

"Whoa. Did you just insult my hair?" Sirius said, holding up a hand. "Did you just go there?"

"Greasy," Peter said with a haughty tone. "Just like Ole Snivelly's."

James clapped his hands a few times to get their attention; Sirius was mid way opening his mouth as he looked ready to go full-on speech mode about how he looked nothing like Snivellus (thank you) and how he was much sexier looking.

"Padfoot, trim your hair," James said. "Wormtail, next time don't stand next to him."

The three friends looked left then right before Peter transformed into a rat and shrunk right out of sight. The bald tail whipped out of sight and ducked and weaved in the grass below the swinging branches.

The rat pawed the knot with his paw to which the branches instantly froze. Not even a leaf stirred on the branch.

Sirius nudged James and turned into a great, black, dog. The dog bounded forward and let the rat climb up on its leg and to its back. The dog barked once and crouched as slid into the base of the trunk.

James hurried forward and as soon his two friends disappeared out of sight. As soon as he slipped into the hole in the trunk, the branches, once again, started moving. James may or may not have found this stone trail a bit haunting. He was tense as if he expected a full grown werewolf to barge through and chase them down.

Padfoot whined and licked James's hand in a comforting way, sticking close to let his friend now he was there. The dog let out a bit of a yip to get his friend's attention but James merely pushed his glasses into place and put a hand on Padfoot's flank.

* * *

Remus stared out the window with bright blue eyes, waiting and exhausted from the moon's effects. However, the silver moon refused to bow and as it came, Remus buckled under its power no matter how much he tried to prevent or hinder it.

His body lengthened, fangs formed, bones reshaped, eyes changing. His body was undergoing the morphing into a werewolf and the last thing to go that night was his human mind.

The werewolf lunged upward, snapping its jaws and locking its amber gaze on the dark gaze of another canine. However, something else held the werewolf from the other canine. The werewolf roared its challenge to the large beast but the animal merely swung its head in warning almost.

James, the stag, reared up on his hind legs and boxed his front legs in warning, making the novice mistake of exposing his soft underbelly. The werewolf instantly launched, the formidable fighter, finding the opportunity to land the prime blow.

The stag bellowed and started bucking as the werewolf locked its jaws around the stag's belly. The stag bucked again and again until his hooves connected with the chin of the werewolf.

The werewolf howled and instantly retreated, recoiling and limping away as it flexed its jaw, opening and closing it to test it. The dog rushed at the werewolf and locked its teeth onto the werewolf's forearm, dragging it away from the stag and turning its attention to him.

The werewolf took a swipe at the dog, rearing up and brandishing its lethal claws and baring its glinting teeth. The eyes of the werewolf screamed power and dominance; it looked ready to tear and devour.

However, the dog was having none of it, barking its challenge and snarling, curling its lip over its teeth in a sign of clear warning. Both canines had their hackles up and their ears flat—their fur was bristling as they sized one another up.

 _Be careful, Padfoot,_ James said, bleeding in the corner.

 _Your blood is driving the werewolf into further aggression, Prongs,_ Peter said fretfully, sniffing the air and scurrying over to the great stag, getting a good look at the wound. _He really got you._

 _I won't hurt him,_ Sirius vowed, though he was still issuing a loud warning, growling low in his throat.

His eyes blazed with the prospect of fighting as it suddenly fused with his dogs instincts in establishing dominance. The werewolf damaged forward in a blur of gray-black fur and latched its dagger like teeth around the dogs ear, shredding it to bits.

The dog howled and rolled himself free from the jaws. He turned to the werewolf, swinging his tail low to the ground as his tongue lolled out. He shook the blood from filling his ears. The werewolf snarled and shook out its head, eyes narrowing.

The stag's legs buckled, forcing him to lay down. James flared out his nostrils and lay his head on the ground, trying to stay awake. He saw Peter rush up to him, putting his paws on the flank of the stag.

Sirius was barking out challenges, circling around the werewolf like a dog herding a sheep. The werewolf landed on all fours, keeping its yellow eyes on the rotating dog and snarled low in its throat.

Sirius let out another low bark, curling his lip back and laying his ears flat against his head. The werewolf turned its hungry gaze from the stag to the dog and growled back, rising up once more and advancing.

The stag let out a bellow but as James tried to get to his hooves, his forelegs buckled and pain flared in his chest and and abdomen area. As painful as it was, James forced himself to remain standing; he was the one who was armed with the most powerful defense.

However, Sirius looked keen on playing rough and starting a fight with the werewolf because know he looked like he was simply egging the beast on. Sirius hopped from side to side, teasing the werewolf as he bounded in and out of range.

The werewolf was less pleased at this game and suddenly lunged, taking the dog off his paws and pinning him down underneath its claws. The werewolf bowed its head low and snarled right in the ear of the dog, digging its claws into the dark fur and hit flesh, creating a stream of blood from the flank.

Sirius yelped and struggled, biting and snarling, scrambling to get the weight off him. His hind legs kicked the werewolf repeatedly but it was not a strong enough blow to knock the werewolf off him.

Pain shot through his head as the werewolf bit his ear and hard. With lightning quick reflexes, Sirius twisted and locked his jaws around the werewolf's nose, wincing at the splatter of blood on his teeth.

The werewolf howled in agony and ripped free, recoiling and shaking blood from its face. Its tongue darted out to lap at its own blood but now its eyes were on its new target, its new challenger. It rose to its hind legs and lifted a clawed paw, roaring its challenge.

The dog laid his ears flat but he did not back away, merely snarling in warning again. It was like a dance. They pranced about one another, prowled. They sniffed out each other, then they attacked.

 _Padfoot, what are you doing?_ James asked, swinging his head from side to side as the werewolf kept turning its amber gaze on him.

 _Trying to display dominance,_ Sirius panted as he was slammed on to the ground by hefty paws. _He's strong._

 _This is not going to turn out well,_ Peter said worriedly.

 _We don't exactly have another way of doing so,_ Sirius grunted, closing his jaws around the werewolf's paw.

Sirius locked his jaws shut and tucked and rolled. The sound of bone snapping resounded throughout the Shrieking Shack and the sheer amount of agony the werewolf let out in a single howl echoed soon after. Sirius instantly rose to his paws, wincing at himself for doing something so careless.

 _Padfoot!_ James shouted.

 _It was an instinct!_ Sirius vowed, whining.

 _He's hurt!_ Peter said to the others, scurrying over to the werewolf who retreated to a corner.

Sirius whined again then shook out his fur, moving slowly over to the werewolf and keeping a steady and even gaze on it but showing no other signs of aggression. The werewolf merely looked at him then looked away, settling on its belly to lay down.

Sirius saw the damage he inflicted upon Remus...or the werewolf by the scent alone. But his teeth and roll had nearly detached the werewolf's paw from its wrist, swollen and crooked, Sirius had bitten through bone and twisted it.

 _I didn't mean to,_ Sirius said quietly.

 _We know,_ James said in reassurance. _We just have to think, now, what we should do._

Sirius padded over to the werewolf and nudged the great canine with his muzzle, sniffing out the worst of the bleeding. The blood pooled at its wrist where Sirius's dagger-like teeth made a deep incision in the dog's flesh.

 _I didn't mean to,_ Sirius said quietly, whining softly.

The werewolf kept its yellow gaze on the dog, fur bristled and hackles raised. Its ears were laid back but it was showing its teeth in a reaction of fear. It snarled low in its throat, a warning but its bark was high-pitched and nervous.

Sirius lay on his belly and crawled to the canine, tongue lolling out to show he was no threat as long as the werewolf did not attack. The werewolf seemed to have gotten the message and sunk low to the ground, showing no signs of defense or aggression but keeping its gaze always on the dog.

James struggled to a stand, his forelegs buckling under the weight as more blood literally splattered the wooden floor beneath him. Stitches were most likely required but Sirius had no time to dwell for the werewolf lifted its head and sniffed the air.

The rat's whiskers twitched but it scurried up James's leg and nestled himself in the antlers, wrapping his bald tail around one if the protruding antlers.

 _Your blood is affecting the werewolf,_ Sirius warned to the stag, tail wagging low to the ground.

 _I can't lie there. I feel too vulnerable,_ James protested but stopped fidgeting.

 _We have to get you out,_ Sirius said, turning his gaze to the rat. _Wormtail?_

 _I dunno what I can do as a rat,_ Peter said.

The werewolf emitted a low growl as the animals stood and spoke to one another. The low rumble startled Sirius into whipping around and facing down the werewolf. The beast found it threatening and roared once more, rising up the best it could whilst still laying down.

 _I can hold him back if you two want to get out,_ Sirius said, maintaining eye contact.

James and Peter could not disagree on the new proposition so they instantly moved towards the door, James limping heavily as he left a trail of blood.

Sirius lunged first after the werewolf hurled itself at the escapees. The great dog bounded forward and locked his jaws around the werewolf's hind leg, yanking it to the ground and pinning it there witg his weight. But the werewolf was stronger—stronger than the dog as it was able to overthrow the canine.

Sirius landed with a hefty thud but instantly shot back to his paws and turned, issuing a challenge to the werewolf, daring for it to approach him. The werewolf took no time to hesitate as it launched an attack, ripping and shredding with its claws as it gauged at Sirius's eyes.

The dog recoiled instantly, still going for the beast's legs, nipping and biting and drawing blood wherever he could score his teeth. One sharp blow to the head had, however, had Sirius collapsing and panting on the ground, thrashing in his own puddle of crimson red.

The room of the Shrieking Shack seemed to careen to the right as the image of the werewolf blurred. The dog let out a biting growl before submitting to the darkness that overtook his mind.

.oOo.

"Don't transform," Peter warned, pulling out his wand. "I can't do stitches so we'll have to find help eventually..."

The poor Gryffindor was really only talking to himself as he pulled out the first aid kit they had set at the base of the trunk always. The stag looked at Peter with wide trust and exposed his cut open belly. Peter parted the fur and patted the wound down with alcohol—antiseptic.

The stag let out a grunt and instinctively swung his head but Peter hushed James and resumed his job, dabbing and mopping the blood, cleaning the wound and ridding the blood.

James was struggling to stay conscious at this point as his head felt light and his eyelids heavy. All he wanted was some sleep but Peter insisted on talking at a rapid speed, telling him to stay awake and focus on the voice.

The pain seemed overwhelming at some points and especially at one, the stag put his head on the ground and closed his eyes, deflating as the agony shot him paralyzed.

* * *

"That..." Remus said, lost for words. "I can't believe it...I can't believe I did that..."

"It wasn't you," James reassured. "It was the werewolf. It wasn't you."

Remus seemed, still, unsettled by this and his expression did not change. It was grim and set, convoluted and confounded. But most importantly it was of guilt.

"Don't you dare apologise for something you cannot help," Sirius wheezed forcefully.

Remus, at first, did not reply. He merely stated at the wall, willing it for it to suddenly turn more interesting but it was a wall and Remus was fooling himself.

"It's okay," James said, holding up his shirt. "They closed me up with magic and gave me blood replishing salve and an infection poultice. I feel fine."

"As do I," Sirius insisted and vowed, looking at Remus with sincerity. "We knew this was going to be tricky, right? We knew this was something almost unheard of. We're testing uncharted waters, Moony. We're bound to run into a few problems along the way."

The reassurance helped but Remus only wished he could abate the sense of gnawing guilt inside of him, wishing he could somehow just...change himself.

He stared at his hands, biting his lip as he sat lost in his thought, daring to believe he could have done something to prevent the injuries of his friends. But perhaps it was the sense of helplessness that made him feel then worst.

* * *

 **Guest: Whoa, I'm sorry but my life does not revolve around getting these stories up. I'm sorry for the lack of quick updates. I'll work on that but I have a life.**

 **Moony1972: Great to hear from you as always. I appreciate the comments and you're right. Things seem almost too good for the boys. Something bad was bound to happen.  
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 **NightVSlash985: I do hope you find this chapter likeable. I hope to continue to read your comments as they do make me feel very happy.  
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 **Overall, I am iffy about this chapter. It was certainly not my strongest. I'll do better on the next!**

 **Sneak Preview (because why not?): James's birthday is coming round...what do those Marauders have in mind?**


	31. XXXI: A Toast

**You know the routine.  
All rights remain.**

Remus sat in the window sill of the empty corridor. With students eating dinner, he was able to enjoy the silence and ability to live inside his head.

Even though it had been a while since the full moon, Remus was still sore. Even though it had been a while since the full moon, Remus could vividly remember the stitches in James's front torso. The guilt lay heavily in his chest and would not abate no matter what they said.

However, Remus had gotten used to working on a fake and plastered smile, believable no matter how forced it was. It used to be full moons were his worst nights but that changed now...now every night was his worst night ever. But what could he do about it?

Remus heaved a sigh and continued to stare out the window, flexing a very sore muscle in his leg.

"Tough night?"

Remus jolted and caught sight of flaming red hair before anything else. Those piercing green eyes were the second thing he came to notice, and the third was the genuinely curious voice.

"Bit exhausting," Remus admitted, moving his legs and motioning her over. "I'm just exhausted today though I have no reason to be."

Lily perched herself up on the window sill across from Remus, tangling her legs in between his. She looked at him with a frown and her eyebrows drawn together, pursing her lips.

"What?" Remus asked, noticing the way she scrutinized him.

"Is there always going to be this rift between us?"

The question had taken him by surprise, making the Gryffindor raise his eyebrows in mild and suppressed surprise. Lily, the ever observant one, caught on and matched his actions folding her arms over her chest.

"No," Remus said simply. "No, I've forgiven you."

"People forgive easily, Remus," Lily pointed out gently, rubbing the corner of her eye wearily. "But they don't forget easily, they almost never forget, Remus. I'm sick of you thinking you have a foot in both worlds."

Remus noted the hardness that came to her tone as she continued to speak. Innocently curious and confounded, Remus tilted his head to the side in questioning, looking for elaboration.

"I can take insults, I can take silence, I can take the absence," Lily said, her voice suddenly devoid of any emotion. "I'm not afraid to admit that. I'm not afraid to admit I'm not okay."

Remus blinked, listening intently and finding himself growing defensive.

"But what I can't take is you thinking you can give me half."

Stung, he squared his shoulders. "What does that mean, Lily? How am I giving you half? _What_ am I giving you half of?"

"Friendship," Lily said without missing a beat. "I know I've done you wrong but you don't get to act like a victim here and expect me to stick around while you flaunt it. I apologized a thousand times and a thousand times more and you say it's all fine."

Remus opened his mouth to say something in retalitation, annoyed she was turning this back on him but she talked right over him, not giving him a chance to say anything.

"So it's either you act like my friend or you stop being my friend."

That statement ran his blood cold in his veins and Remus looked at Lily with widened eyes.

"I'm tired of this half...whatever this is," Lily said, throwing her hands up. She sat there for about a half minute later before she got up and dusted off her skirt. "Wow..."

Remus watched in silence as Lily Evans walked away.

* * *

 _"How are we going to celebrate Prongs's sixteenth birthday_?"

The Marauders sat in Hogsmeade (in The Three Broomsticks to be specific) in the back room Madam Rosmerta had given them the keys to. She had, herself, temporarily left to visit her sister in Australia and had lended the boys a part of her restaurant, trusting they were going to act responsibly.

However, even The Marauders's most responsible member was falling under the temptation of intoxication. So, with Remus giving little resistence, it was not hard to whip out the alcohol and the music.

"Get drunk," James mumbled, rubbing his eyes and flopping on the bed in the back room, pulling a bottle out for himself. "And forget tonight."

"I second that," Sirius said, raising his bottle to James's words.

"I concur," Remus said thirdly, nodding and popping the top off his bottle of whiskey.

Getting drunk on a rainy old March 27th seemed like the prime way to spend a birthday. To say the least, The Marauders seemed to have had the cloud of rain over their heads the entire week.

"To failure," Sirius sighed.

Sirius nursed his bottle, trying not to remember the disappointment in his mother's soft voice, the anger she held in her tone, and the tone she used. It was not anything like Walburga Black... _the_ Walburga Black Sirius knew.

The mother of Sirius never was afraid of raising her voice at him; she had a pair of lungs and she was proud to use them but in this letter, she spoke softly, almost defeated, with the sound of Sirius's father muttering and crying in the background. Sirius had to endure the whole three minutes of listening to how his parents had given up on him and their only hope was gone.

Regulus stood behind Sirius and stared at his elder brother for a moment before walking away with an impassive gaze. Sirius swore he was done with his family but there were times where he could really feel the gap of his loss.

"To demons," Peter lamented.

Peter rubbed his eyes wearily, dead tired of living in the name of poverty and only receiving pity, not sympathy. He could never escape pity for it seemed to follow him like a second shadow...a darker shadow.

As much as he hated to admit it, his own friends sometimes pitied him without even knowing they were doing it. Peter may not be the brightest of them all but he was certainly was not stupid.

He could tell when his friends sympathized him versus when they pitied him. However, Peter could not find it in his heart to call them out on it, knowing it would only upset them so he kept it silent, to himself, and endured it with a silent voice. He left it all to his head. Why? He was just that friend in the corner.

"To devil's temptation," James murmured.

James had some trouble inwardly none of his friends ever noticed. They did not notice the way his weight fluctated or his mood swung because he had mastered the ability to hold it to himself.

Unhealthy as it may be, James had no intention of telling his friends anything yet albeit his heart broke every time his friends kept saying "no more lying" like they specifically knew James was hiding something. His pride was strong and had plastered on a strong mask of bravado that hid his emotions well.

He was James Potter, the one who seemingly had _the_ perfect life. He had money, great parents, a huge mansion, girls' attention, ring leader of his group, great marks, Quidditch star.

But behind those titles, James was broken and damned if he let anyone know that now. Damn the alcohol. Damn his budding alcoholism. The liquid confidence was already working on loosening his tongue.

"To bravado," Remus chimed in last.

Remus had noticed something was wrong with his friends, all three of them, yet they would not say a word about it. He knew his friends had some secrets that they kept to themselves and that did not bother him in the slightest tlthough it hurt when they would pine and lament, claiming their lives were so bitterly unfair but not telling him what was wrong.

The worst part was the feeling like he could do something but no matter how many times he offered his assistance, they all would push him away and claim it was actually nothing and they were merely being theatrical because that was just who they were.

Remus knew it was in their nature to be dramatic but it made him feel less significant to have his own friends deem him unworthy enough to accept his help; he was lost.

"You know..." Remus said, the alcohol making his voice slow and dull. "I keep watching my friends tie themselves in their knots and pine about the lack of people who care about them."

He swallowed painfully and continued.

"But I'm here begging them to let me help. Yet...they still won't let me help. Rumors fly, no one knows the truth from the lies. They put me out sometimes, bending and twisting me when I spend all my energy trying to forget the way my friends take me for granted."

Remus took a long swig from the bottle and licked his lips.

"And the worst part is when they flat out lie to my face. So, how does one help another when they don't want help?"

He turned to James and let the silence work its magic.

James winced and writhed, squirming and fidgeting uncomfortably in the heavy absence of noise, hands gripping the neck of his bottle until his knuckles were white. His eyes darted about as he looked around the room, anywhere from Remus's blue gaze.

"This entire year, you've been trying to hide the whiskey on your breath," Remus pointed out quietly, his voice oddly flat from any emotion. "I'm not stupid, James. I've noticed."

"I've gotten better," James found himself saying, putting his chin in his hand.

Remus merely blinked, looking for an explanation. When James fell silent, he turned to look at his friend fully and asked in a quieter voice, "Why?"

James shrugged wordlessly, figuring if Remus was going to use silence on him, he could use it right back. However, the alcohol made his brain sluggish, making it hard for him to think clearly.

"Waste of space, insignificant, good for nothing..."

Remus used to think James's habit of letting Evans's words get to him on a personal level was stupid and childish but now that he had opened his mind and stopped thinking like the rude person he always was, he began to understand the sheer power of words, the way Evans could tear a person down by simple sentences.

Many would find it amusing to watch James being publically humiliated while Evans shouted at him, telling him sod off because she would rather chance her luck with "the Giant Squid" than go on a date with him. Masked, James would brush it off but her words lingered in his head, scratching at his self-esteem, gauging at it until it was shards of what it used to be.

"Getting drunk helps numb the pain," James murmured softly, looking at the floor with dulled eyes. "It helps me regain..."

"Confidence."

Peter spoke this time, looking directly at James as he did. He seemed to have known exactly what James was going to say and though it did not come out as a shock to him it came out as a shock to the others. James blinked and raised his head in surprise, Sirius just looked baffled, and Remus looked in disbelief. Peter shrugged as if it did not phase him.

"That's it," James said quietly, nodding. "That's it."

Peter nodded.

"I expected that much," he said, taking a small sip of his own whiskey. "Alcohol is liquid confidence."

The mournful tune of the music played in the background as The Marauders sat in silence, listening to the suppressing lyrics, each lost in their own thought. Despite the inebriation, the sobriety seemed heavy, the time slowed, and the wounds left open.

James wrapped his arm around himself and leaned against the wall, tipping his head skyward to look at the ceiling, hoping for some kind of relief. But the alcohol weighed heavily in his system.

Reopening these wounds made him feel vulnerable and emotional, two things James really hated feeling. Although there was something in the back of his head telling him this was better than hiding it all away until it broke him.

"I'm sorry."

The two words were out of James's mouth before he could stop himself and suddenly he found himself turning very garrulous, anything to vanquish the horrible, heavy, taunting, mocking silence.

"I've gotten better. I'm sorry for hiding it. I've tried so hard to tell myself that I'm fine. And though I still think I am, I'm not and I've been all alone along. I didn't want help because I didn't think I needed it. I didn't want to become another statistic."

He continued to ramble on without pausing to think much.

"I wanted to prove to myself I could help...myself. I hate thinking a stranger could help me better than I can help myself. I didn't want people to know that I was struggling. I didn't want them to think I was weak."

James buried his face in his hands.

"I want people to think I can go the distance. I want people to think I am invicible. I don't want Evans to think she can get to me. I don't want people to think I get emotional. But damn, it's hard. It's hard to make believe you're something of a hero."

He wiped at his eyes.

"I want to be a Gryffindor. I want to be the Gryffindor people think I am. I want to be anyone...I want to be anyone but myself."

He dropped the bottle and wrapped both arms around himself, trying hard not to break down. He wanted to get out, to get away, to run and never look back. He could not wait to graduate Hogwarts sometimes but at other times, he never wanted to leave. He found himself at war constantly, fighting against his own demons that were really just his inside friends.

"I've never seen you so broken," Remus said softly, rising to his feet. "You want all these things, you don't want all these things...you're going to have to straighten that out."

Remus carded his fingers through his sandy brown hair.

"You're going to have some wins and loses regardless. You're not going to get everything you want, I'm afraid."

It was true, no one had ever seen James so lost and vulnerable. It was something his friends never wanted to see again because it looked as if the world has beared all its weight on his shoulders when he was prepared and had properly crushed the life from his body. It was hard not to soak in James's despair like a sponge for it was coming off in such powerful waves.

Perhaps five years of remaining the rock of the group had finally taken its toll on him and broken him at last. This was James Potter, seemingly the Gryffindor who could be the King. He could move mountains. He could be a master of himself entirely. He could storm Heaven. He could storm Hell. When he was tired, no one could tell.

But James was human.

And people, including his friends, forgot that.

But he wasn't put in Gryffindor for nothing; he was James Potter, he was a champion, he was wrong but he was strong. He was a Seeker but he really was a seeker. If anything, he wanted to look back at this moment and feel like he was standing on top of the world.

.oOo.

"You never cease to amaze me," Remus said. "I don't want you to forget that."

James looked up at Remus, finding comfort in the werewolf's gentle tone.

"You don't need to drink," he said. "You don't need to dull the pain with intoxication."

The fifth year reached out to the bottle and pulled it away, looking at James the entire time he did so. His friend did not bat an eye as the bottle was removed from his tight grasp. Instead, he just wrapped his arm around himself and put his chin in his other hand.

Was it a dream? Was it a nightmare? Was it a competition? With who? The world?

James heaved a heavy sigh, worn done and exhausted, deciding this was the most somber but best birthday he had yet. He could always trust his friends to tell him the things he needed to hear, not the things he expected or wanted to hear.

While some may find this agitating or even hurtful, James was dependent on the reality his friends often thrust upon him. It was something that kept him anchored to the ground.

There were several bottles littering the floor, shared among the four of them, and it made James feel drowsy and tired. He leaned more against Sirius's back and closed his eyes lazily, letting his thoughts run wild.

 _I don't have to be a soldier._

 _It's okay to rest._

 _It's okay to feel._

 _It's okay to feel wounded._

 _It's okay to let the cut sting._

 _It's okay to take a step back._

 _I don't always have to take the front line._

 _I don't have to a mountain._

 _Moutains crumble._

 _Let the barricades fall._

 _It's okay._

 _I can be wrong._

 _Being wrong makes me right._

 _To be right again is to be okay._

James opened his eyes and looked about the room, sitting up a bit more and wondering if he could just sum up what he just thought because it left him unpleasantly roiled.

Biting his lip, he looked at his friends, eyes landing on each of them. Peter and Remus were talking with one another while playing hangman on a piece of parchment lying between them. Sirius was humming quietly, nudging James in the side, sensing his stirring.

"Everything's going to be okay," Sirius said.

James just sat and listened, not disagreeing nor agreeing, just listening.

* * *

 **I know you don't want to hear a sob story so I'll shorten it. In compendium, I lost my closest friend to suicide...so sorry for taking it out on this chapter. I did promise a light hearted one but I couldn't find it in myself to write one.** **I'm exhausted. I'm tired. I'm 24601% done (huzzah if you get the reference).**

 **To all reviewers and readers, thank you for taking the time to read on. I promise on the writing deities above I will add a very happy and light chapter. But thank you again.**

 **It's been a long day.**


	32. XXXII: A Dreamer Can Dream

**All rights remain.**

Spring break just might have been one of the best times around. Spring always brought upon new cheer with it. Winter was finally closing off and warming up, the air was not biting, and the warmth was starting to thaw the ice and snow—not to mention the lovely smell of spring that came with it. Everything just smelled warm and fresh.

It wasn't just the warmth that The Marauders loved about spring. It was the heavy downpours of rain that they found the best. Contrary to popular belief, rainstorms were the favorites of many, including professors and students alike. Rainstorms were fun and though one isn't technically supposed to be out in a rainstorm, everyone still did.

With the new improvement of weather, The Marauders attitudes seemed to take a 180 turn. They had gone from lamenting to upbeat once more, finding laughter much easier to come by and smiling far less forced. It was a change that seemed to improve the attitudes of those around them. Frank Longbottom, who had fallen rather silent for a few months, hardly speaking and barely acknowledging The Marauders, was now bright and talkative once more.

Now, the problem this year was the dreaded examinations. They had been studying year long but now with the OWLs looming nearer, they haven't been studying nearly as much. However, this did not include Remus. Remus was going mad. He was always found in weird places. His lanky frame allowed him to curl into bizarre positions in bizzare places. Once they had found him in between two statues with a book.

"Blimey, I think you're graying, Moony," Sirius crowed, dancing about the fifth year, whose nose was in his textbook.

Blimey, I think you just made a great observation, Captain Obvious," Remus said without missing a beat or taking his eyes off the text.

"Blimey, I think all this reading has made you ruder, Sergeant Sarcasm," Sirius chirped, stopping at Remus's left and draping an elbow on his friend's shoulder.

"Blimey, this isn't punny anymore," James said with a wild grin, happily sounding very sober.

"Blimey, nice one, Colonel Comeback," Peter snickered, deciding he wouldn't mind joining in the fun.

"Blimey, thank you, Lieutenant Loser," James said in a fake military salute.

Lily Evans, who was walking past, rolled her eyes at the fours' antics and stalked past them. Another thing spring had offered them. Good fortune. Remus and Lily had made up and were closer than ever. There was no long talk nor any sobbing. There was only a brief moment of eye contact before they started laughing and sharing stories and reliving memories. It was then, at that time, they knew their friendship had been restored.

"Oi, Evans!"James shouted.

"Keep it Major Maggot," Lily called from over her shoulder.

Sirius roared with laughter and as she rounded the corner, she even flashed specifically Remus a fond smile before disappearing around it.

There was one thing that seemed to be going James's way. Lily Evans and Snape had a feud that was rather public. Mary MacDonald had recapped the entire conversation to The Marauders—evidently having been caught in the middle of just a few disagreements. As nice as it was, it often left Lily in a bitter mood for the next few hours in which only select few people were allowed to talk personal with her—Remus included.

~THREE DAYS AGO~

Lily and Snape sat back against the rocky part of the lake's shore. Their feet were up and they were relaxing in the new warmth of the sun beating down. Lily had her shirt pushed up a bit to reveal a flat and rather toned abdomen.

Snape was leaning back, elbows propped up on a pair of rocks behind him as his eyes traveled to the expanse of exposed skin more than once.

"Think I should get my belly button pierced?" Lily joked suddenly, noticing his stare.

"Wh-what?" Snape spluttered, flushing a bit red.

"You're staring at my belly like it has some kind of awful disease or something," Lily pointed out and raised an eyebrow, looking at him with that sort of questioning gaze.

"S-sorry," Snape said and turned away.

Lily shrugged it off and lay back down all the way, tugging Snape's arm so he would lie beside her. If was times like these that made up the word tranquility. However, tranquility often never lasted though neither of them knew why it didn't this time.

"Severus!" barked a voice. "Did you blow us off for her again?"

Lily cracked open an eye and looked up to see Mulciber and Avery once again at Snape's line of vision, obviously agitated beyond words.

"I do have friends other than you," Snape pointed out mildly. He did, however, turn his gaze to Lily for a moment, wondering and waiting for her reaction.

Lily remained silent and eerily so. It was that calculating gaze she wore that indicated she was definitely sizing a person up, deciding if they were really worth getting into an argument with or if they should merely just be brushed off. The thing about Lily was her uncanny sense of judgement.

Severus sent them both an apologetic shrug and turned back to Lily. Though not many noticed, it was clear to others who Severus chose in the end. Lily was never one to hide her appreciation but the thing was, Severus was never very clear at displaying who he chose in the end.

"What about that Mudblood? Snape, you've been M.I.A for weeks now," Avery complained, stamping his foot and demanding for an explanation.

"Sorry," Severus said, "don't let me stop you."

"Are you still in for tonight though?" Nott asked eagerly, speaking for the first time since he came over. "Don't tell mr you're missing that!"

"No, of course not," Severus said in earnestly. "I wouldn't dare want to miss it."

Lily was scowling the entire time this conversation took place. She looked irritable her friend was choosing, not her, but his bad influence over his better judgement even after she had asked him to think before he acted. Severus merely brushed off her words so it seemed. Lily narrowed her bright green eyes at him as soon as that stupid group of idiots left.

"What?" Severus asked, almost challengingly. "They're my friends, Lils. They're my friends."

"Friends is a really strong word for what they are to you and what you are to them," Lily protested gently. She did so not unkindly so as to not upset her friend. "Sev, friends are like you and I. Not like you and them."

Severus scowled a bit. "What does that supposed to mean, Lily?"

"Severus, can't you see how rude they are?" Lily said, smacking her forehead. "Can you really not see how they are just using you?"

"They are not!" Severus insisted, closing his eyes in agitation. "Why do you insist on being so difficult with them?"

"Why do you insist on defending them when you know they're doing no good," Lily huffed, growing more and more irritated.

"Just like the way you defend those stupid Gryffindors—"

" _Excuse me_?" Lily said, pointedly touching her _red and gold striped_ tie.

"I was talking about Potter and his friends," Severus said a bit hastily. "You defended them when they're obviously up to no good either."

" _Sev, they do not play around with dark magic_ ," Lily snapped, growing angrier with every word.

Severus blinked then looked down and away. He knew better than to accuse her of such things then point them out to her again. He sighed dejectedly, hating to admit it but something about Lily just seemed different. It was like she went from shy and quiet to loud and confident. He, of course, wanted Lily to feel confident but it was like he was turning into nothing but a shadow of her.

And that was when he realized he would be perfectly content being Lily Evans's shadow.

And there was another realization.

He, Severus Snape, was in love with Lily Evans.

* * *

James and Sirius were playing hangman in Transfiguration. Peter and Remus were looking out the window and practically planning out their future as they passed notes. Transfiguration was important and all but when the Professor had no idea what he was talking about, it was uninteresting. Professor McGonagall was ill with something and had to find a ghost worthy enough as a substitute.

-Okay, we should make a list of places to go. -P

-France but to Rouen, not Paris. -R

-Wait, why not Paris? -P

-It's too cliché. -R

-Touché. Let's go to America. -P

-What's in America? -J

-What ISN'T in America is the better question. -S

-Yeah, Prongs. America has everything. -R

-Salem! -S

-Yes, we can go. -R

-Besides America, where else? -J

-Rio. -S

-I'm liking this idea. -P

-Course you do, Wormtail. I came up with it. -S

-That is NOT a legit reason. But Rio sounds good. -R

-I just want to take a trip and run! -J

-Who doesn't? -P

-Wanderlust! It's contagious. -S

-Hardly! -R

-Anyway, maybe this summer we can take a road trip. -S

-We should wait till we're eighteen, mate. -R

-We can buy booze then. -J

-... -P

-... -S

-... -R

-What? -J

-So besides that, we should wait. Prongs, I swear to God, if you look, I will set your hair on fire but Lily is looking at you. -R

-Really! -J

James almost did look over but a swift kick underneath the table made him yelp and rub his bruising shin.

Lily was, more or less, looking at James. However, looking was more glaring. Whatever he had done seemed to really have her on edge but Remus swore there was something more than just Lily's glare. Perhaps he was imagining it but it looked almost like contemplative.

"What is she doing? What is she doing?" James asked eagerly, trying his hardest not to turn around and stare back.

"She's glaring at you, mate," Sirius said lazily.

"Well," Remus said disapprovingly at Sirius. "That was not how I would have said it but she's like...just staring."

"I heard she got into a fight with Snivellus," Peter said casually, folding the ends of his parchment out of boredom. "That's what I heard at least."

Peter was the ears of The Marauders. Without him, they wouldn't know half the things they do about other people. Peter was the perfect gossip collector since there were so many willing to do so. All heads turn to Peter.

"What?" he asked nervously.

"This is news!" James exclaimed, holding his hands out. "This is huge! They had a fight? They never have rows. They had less rows than we have."

"In our defense," Sirius said blandly. "We have four very different people in our group and they only have two. We are at a disadvantage here."

Remus rolled his eyes and resumed his own business, even if that was just staring out a window and thinking about all the places he wanted to go.

"Is she still looking?" James asked eagerly, running a hand through his hair to mess it up. Sirius snickered, Peter rolled his eyes, and Remus scowled.

"You wonder why she disdains you so, Prongs, that's why she does. That right there," he said, pointing to James in general. "Stop messing up your hair. She hates that."

"Who can resist this I-Just-Got-Off-My-Broomstick Look?" James scoffed offhandedly as if he was being genuinely honest.

-We should go to Bora Bora. -J

-Oh, and we should go on Caminar de Satiago. -S

-Life goals, mates, life goals. -J

-Now, go away so I can focus. -R

-Aren't you sweet? -S

-Did you get the sarcasm? -J

-Yes, Prongs. I got the sarcasm. Did you get the exasperation? -R

-Oh, so you want it to be like that, eh? -J

-Prongs, this is childish really. -R

-Says you! -S

"Boys!"

The booming voice startled them all as Professor McGonagall towered over them, looking like a hawk ready to devour its prey. She looked very displeased at the lack of attention the four of them—including Remus—were giving her.

James gave his three friends that I-Got-This Look before looking at Professor McGonagall with the utmost serious and innocent looking expression.

"Professor," James said sweetly, "I am actually very good at multitasking. We all are. In fact, we had a small discussion ab—"

"Mhm," Professor McGonagall saod, clearly unconvinced. "And what was my lesson even about?"

"The transfiguration of a dog to a cat," Sirius said proudly. Luckily, he had overheard that.

"And what is the first step?" Professor McGonagall pressed.

"It's spinning a web of magic with your wand _before_ casting the spell," Peter supplied.

"See, Professor, we were listening to you," James said with a wide smile. "You have a habit of underestimating us."

That was one thing Professor McGonagall agreed. She _did_ have a tendency to underestimate the four and that was the problem; usually this was never in a good way.

"You will do well to remember there are other students you have to be considerate about. Am I making myself understood, boys?"

"Understood," the four of them chorused.

* * *

Now that James heard Evans and Snape got in a fight, he was amping up his weird obsession with the redhead even more. He insisted Remus enlist to help him woo such a wondrous woman. Remus had tried to wiggle out of it but James was persistent.

"Pleaseeeee!"

"Prongs—"

"Moony! You are going to ruin my chances with Evans if you don't do this!"

"Prongs—"

"Moony. Are we friends?"

"Yes. But Prongs—"

"Moony. Do you care about my happiness?"

"Yes. But Prongs—"

"Moony. Do you want me to find the love of my life?"

"Prongs—"

"Great! Thanks, Moony!"

James threw his arms around Remus's neck and skipped off, arm in arm, with Sirius. Remus stuttered for a moment before groaning loudly and walking after his two friends.

Peter snickered over the ordeal but he said nothing, merely looking at Remus with amusement in his eyes. Remus looked less pleased, shaking his head at the entire situation he somehow got himself roped into.

Lily was walking down the other way and as Remus walked past her, Lily struck out an arm and seized Remus's wrist with lightning speed, walking round the corner.

"Lily?"

"Ugh. Remus. We need to talk."

"About?"

"What's with you and the one worded responses?"

"Huh?"

"See? What did Potter say?"

"Nothing."

Lily glared at him, folding her arms over her chest as she eyeballed her friend. Remus threw up his hands then placed one on Lilys shoulder.

"Okay," he said. "What can I do you for?"

"Nothing. Well...it's Sev. Him and I got in a fight..." Lily said, deflating a bit. "I need your help apologising."

"Apologising? For what?" Seamus asked, bewildered.

"For being inconsiderate. But it's not like this went one way," Lily said then added that in defense for herself. "Remus. Will you help me?"

"Lily...?" Remus trailed off miserably. "I want your help getting him back."

Remus sighed, deciding that he definitely did not deserve being shoved into the middle of his two friends.

"Remus?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Can we make a compromise?" Remus asked, an idea popping into his head.

"What is this compromise, Remus?" Lily asked in an exasperated tone. She looked weary but she never declined.

"How about if I help you with Snape, you have one decent conversation with James tonight," Remus said, killing two birds with one stone.

"Fine," Lily said easily, not even with a moment's hesitation.

"Really?" Remus asked in astonishment.

"Whatever, Remus. This silly little schoolboy crush has got to end at some point," Lily said though mostly to convince herself this compromise was worth it.

"Excellent!" Remus said excitedly, readjusting the strap of his book bag on his shoulder. "I'll tell him and how about we meet at lunch to figure things out?"

Lily waved Remus off as the two went their opposite ways. Surely this will be enough to get James to stop asking him to do favors—or that was what Remus was hoping when he walked down the hall.

And lunch couldn't have come at a better time. Just around the corner, the Great Hall was buzzing with people who had an open period and could find some time to eat. James, Peter, and Sirius were sitting at the end of the Gryffindor table playing Exploding Snaps when Remhs came up go them.

"Now, I am about to give you some good news, Prongs, so you can thank me later. However, you _cannot_ push it or you will unravel everything I worked hard to get."

"You sound like McGonagall. What did you do? Turn in an essay early?" James said and put his elbows on the table. "Paddy, you're bleeding."

"What? What? Where?" Sirius yelped, waving his cards around as he looked for the telltale red.

"No, it's an expression," Remus said exasperatedly, annoyed they were already off subject. "It means the other players can see your cards."

"Oh!" Sirius said in relief. "Why didn't you just say so?"

"I thought we just did," Remus said. "Look, anyway, Prongs—do you want to hear it or not?"

"I gave you the opportunity to show Lily Evans you are not a complete bigheaded, egoistical, pratty, toerag. Don't mess it up."

There was silence before James lit up like a firework. Good entire expression changed, going from noncommittal to eager in the matter of seconds.

"You best not be joking," Jmes said then leaped to his feet. "When is this happening?"

"Tonight. Seven. Room 301, the old abandoned classroom McGonagall took us into to practice Aguamenti."

"You are amazing!" James exclaimed.

* * *

"Okay, so you get annoyed with Snape's other friends, yeah?" Remus asked.

He and Lily sat in the alcove of the corridor. They had their things all around them on the bench that they sat on, not paying any attention to the others that walked past them.

"Absolutely, Remus! They play with dark magic and that's not something Sev would do without them," Lily said sadly and shook her head dismally.

"Lil, are you sure—"

"What does that supposed to mean?" Lily asked in a challenging tone.

"Maybe that _is_ something Snape is into and if so, then there's nothing that you can really do to change that. You can't _change_ your friends, Lil."

"I'm not trying to change him," Lily said in her defense. "I am trying to get him out of some bad habits. that would be something you'd do for your friends. Remhs, imagine if one of your best friends were dabbling in dark magic. How would that make you feel?"

"Rubbish but you really can't go comparing our friends. Snape actually likes Defense Against The Dark Arts," Remus insisted.

Lily sighed again, perhaps even admitting defeat to herself inwardly.

"Why don't you reason with him before you go making accusations and pointing fingers?" Remus suggested.

Lily offered a small shrug in response.

"Fine. Yeah. Okay."

She paused.

"So around seven in 301?" Lily asked.

Remhs nodded.

* * *

Nos that it was after school hours and the students could relax, they didn't have to wear uniform. James, dressed in rather slim fitted dark pants and a solo colored long sleeved shirt.

Lily came round wearing fitted black pants with a gray sweatshirt with no good. It was rare to see Lily dressed like this. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, her hair wrapped around the hair band. Strands of loose hair hung around her face.

"Okay," Lily said, walking up to James. "What do you want to talk about? I'm open for suggestions."

James sighed and sat down on one of the desks, tapping his fingers nervously on his knee.

"I want to ask you just...just one question," James said.

James knew she was in every bit of mental agony talking to him but he stuck through it.

"Fire away," Lily said and leaned against the nearest wall.

"What do you see in Severus Snape that I evidently don't?"

"He's modest, Potter. That is what I see in Sev. And Remus for that matter," Lily said and shook her head. "Now it's my turn to ask you a question."

"Fire away," James said.

"Why don't you ever let your arrogance go?" Lily asked and put a hand on her hip. "You act so sanctimonious even though I know that you know you're not."

"Maybe it has to do something with the way you treat me?" James said as if it was the most obvious thing.

That left Lily speechless and sheepish and James shy and vulnerable.

"Ah," said she.

And to say the least, that night conversation did not last long after those two confessions but they both left feeling completely different about one another than they did when they first came there.


	33. XXXIII: The Memory of the Year

**All rights remain.**

No one would have expected the OWLs to come so unexpectedly. Professor have been talking about it ever since the beginning of fifth year. But, truly, in a blink of an eye, time has slipped past them ever so suddenly.

"Quick! It's _Stupefy_ , right? To stun?" Remus reeled off.

"And Aguamenti for a jet of water," Peter said nervously.

"And the difference between goblins and dwarves are what they manufacture," Remus recited to himself.

"You two are going to give yourselves coronaries before the exams," James snorted.

Sirius snickered.

Remus sighed and shut his book. Usually he would have bugged out more at that comment but he merely deflated. Perhaps he really was worrying too much over his exams. He had confidently studied like a good student.

"You could be wrong," Remus chided ever so slightly. "Have you even looked at it?"

"I don't need to look at that rubbish," Sirius said at once. "I know it all already!"

Remus rolled his eyes at the flippancy and nonchalance but he said nothing in return. Not daring to argue, Remus let them be.

The Marauders moved to take their Defense Against The Dark Arts OWL though there were so many students with the same motive, there was not enough room in a classroom. The Marauders found themselves standing in the middle of the Great Hall, but the four House tables were gone. Instead there were more than a hundred smaller tables, all facing the same way.

Not ten minutes later, all the students had been instructed to specific seats. Professor Flitwick was found at the head of the Great Hall standing upon a stack of books.

"Attention! Please!" he said.

The students all looked up in response.

"Your exams are charmed with several layers of anti-cheating Charms so please do not try. Your quills are charmed with the same. Nice try, Stebbins!"

As the giant clock tolled, every student had their head bent low, scribbling on a roll of parchment. The only sound was the scratching of quills and the occasional rustle as somebody adjusted their parchment.

Despite the sunshine was streaming through the high windows onto the bent heads, which shone chestnut and copper and gold in the bright light, none of them were able to enjoy the nice weather. They were all hunched over their work, determines to get it done.

Remus was getting a nasty headache from staring at stark white parchment against black ink. His back and shoulders ached from sitting, doubled over his work. However, it seemed to pay off for he had at least six inches more writing than his neighbor.

"Five more minutes!"

Professor Flitwick was walking past James, who was straightening up now, putting down his quill, pulling his roll of parchment toward him so as to reread what he had written.

Remus watched, from the corner of his eye, as James yawned hugely and rumpled up his hair, making it even messier than it had been.

Then, with a glance toward ProfessorFlitwick, he turned in his seat and grinned at a boy sitting four seats behind him.

Sirius was lounging in his chair at his ease, tilting it back on two legs. He was very good-looking; his dark hair fell into his eyes. Upon those features were a sense of boredom as he looked out the window longingly at the clear skies.

A girl sitting behind him was eyeing him hopefully, though Sirius didn't seem to have noticed.

Remus blinked out of his daze, looking back at his answers and frowning slightly. He looked up when he heard a tiny whimper. His eyes landed on Peter.

Peter l looked anxious; he was chewing his fingernails, staring down at his paper, scuffing the ground with his toes. Every now and then he glanced hopefully at his neigh- bor's paper.

James yawned again as he began doodling on a bit of scrap parchment. He had drawn a Snitch and was now tracing the letters L.E. That last conversation they had together had his heart aflutter in all the right ways.

"Quills down, please!" Professor Flitwick said, raising his hands. "That means you too, Stebbins! Please remain seated while I collect your parchment! _Accio_!"

More than a hundred rolls of parchment zoomed into the air and into Professor Flitwick's outstretched arms, knocking him backward off his feet. Several people laughed. A couple of students at the front desks got up, took hold of Professor Flitwick beneath the elbows, and lifted him onto his feet again.

Sirius and James were two of the students who laughed. Remus and Peter were two of the students who didn't pay attention to that at all.

"Thank you . . . thank you," Professor Flitwick said, sounding a bit dazed. "Very well, everybody, you're free to go!"

James frowned at his parchment then crossed out the L. E. he had been embellishing, jumped to his feet, stuffed his quill and the exam question paper into his bag, which he slung over his back, and stood waiting for Sirius to join him.

Remus scratched his nose absentmindedly as he tried to remember _everything_ —every answer he had written down. He was already predicting how many points were deducted from bad answers.

"Did you like question ten, Moony?" Sirius asked with a grin as they emerged into the Entrance Hall.

Remus was expecting that from the moment his eyes landed on the question.

"Loved it," he said briskly. " 'Give five signs that identify the werewolf.' Excellent question."

"D'you think you managed to get all the signs?" James asked in tone of mock concern.

"Think I did," Remus deadpanned, looking completely seriously, as they joined the crowd thronging around the front doors eager to get out into the sunlit grounds. "One: He's sitting on my chair. Two: He's wearing my clothes. Three: His name's Remus Lupin."

Sirius and James roared with laughter. Even Remus had to chuckle at himself. Peter was the only one who didn't laugh.

"I got the snout shape, the pupils of the eyes, and the tufted tail," he said anxiously, "but I couldn't think what else—"

"How thick are you, Wormtail?" James snorted impatiently. "You run round with a werewolf once a month—"

"Keep your voice down," Remus snapped in a small plea.

The Marauders strode off down the lawn toward the lake, unaware that Snape followed, still poring over the paper and apparently with no fixed idea of where he was going. Although, Snape did not seem to notice thr four Marauders either.

"I wish I could know how I did now!" Peter said, running a hand over his eyes.

"Well, I thought that paper was a piece of cake," Sirius said with relaxed ease. "I'll be surprised if I don't get Outstanding on it at least."

"Me too," James concurred. He put his hand in his pocket and took out a struggling Golden Snitch.

"Where'd you get that?"

"Nicked it," James said casually. He started playing with the Snitch, allowing it to fly as much as a foot away and seizing it again; his reflexes were excellent.

Peter seemes to forget his worries as he watched James in awe. The party of four stopped in the shade of their very favorite beech tree on the edge of the lake and threw themselves down on the grass.

They still remained unaware that Snape had settled himself on the grass in the dense shadows of a clump of bushes. However, Snape was as deeply immersed in the O.W.L. paper as ever; he, too, was still unaware of The Marauders.

The sunlight was dazzling on the smooth surface of the lake, on the bank of which the group of laughing girls who had just left the Great Hall were sitting with shoes and socks off, cooling their feet in the water.

Remus, warmed and content, pulled out a book and was reading. Sirius stared around at the students milling over the grass, looking rather haughty and bored, eyeing Jmaes every once in a while and rolling them every time Peter got excited.

James was still playing with the Snitch, letting it zoom farther and farther away, almost escaping but always grabbed at the last second.

Peter was watching him with his mouth open. Every time James made a particularly difficult catch, Peter gasped and applauded. James flashed Peter a haughty grin, carding his fingers through his already-messy hair. He looked over at the girls by the water's edge.

"Put that away, will you?" Sirius huffed finally, as James made a fine catch and Peter let out a cheer. "Before Wormtail wets himself from excitement."

Peter turned slightly pink but James grinned.

"If it bothers you," he said, stuffing the Snitch back in his pocket.

"I'm bored," Sirius complained. "Wish it was full moon."

"You might," Remus said with a roll of his eyes, still talking from behind his book. "We've still got Transfiguration, if you're bored you could test me. . . . here."

Remus held out his book.

Sirius snorted.

"I don't need to look at that rubbish, I know it all."

"This'll liven you up, Padfoot," James suddenly said quietly. "Look who it is. . . ."

Sirius's head turned. He had become very still, like a dog that has scented a rabbit.

"Excellent," he said softly. "Snivellus."

Snape was on his feet again, and was stowing the O.W.L. paper in his bag. As he emerged from the shadows of the bushes and set off across the grass, Sirius and James stood up. Remus and Peter remained sitting.

Remus bit his lip and was still staring down at his book, though his eyes were not moving and a faint frown line had appeared between his eyebrows.

Peter was looking from Sirius and James to Snape with a look of avid anticipation on his face. His bright blue eyes watching the unfurling scene with rapt attention.

"All right, Snivellus?" James called out loudly.

Snape reacted so fast it was as though he had been expecting an attack: Dropping his bag, he plunged his hand inside his robes, and his wand was halfway into the air but James was quicker.

, " _Expelliarmus_!" he shouted.

Snape's wand flew twelve feet into the air and fell with a little thud in the grass behind him. Sirius let out a bark of laughter.

" _Impedimenta_!" James said, pointing his wand at Snape, who was knocked off his feet, halfway through a dive toward his own fallen wand.

Students all around had turned to watch. Some of them had gotten to their feet and were edging nearer to watch. Some looked apprehensive, Remus was one of them. And others entertained, Peter and Sirius.

Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him, wands up, James glancing over his shoulder at the girls at the water's edge as he went. The excitement and tension grew so Peter was on his feet now, watching hungrily, edging around Remus to get a clearer view.

"How'd the exam go, Snivelly?" James sneered in mock curiosity as if he truly cared.

"I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment," Sirius jeered viciously. "There'll be great grease marks all over it, they won't be able to read a word."

Several people watching laughed; Snape was clearly unpopular. Peter, finding this all highly amusing and hilarious, sniggered shrilly.

Snape was trying to get up, but the jinx was still operating on him; he was struggling, as though bound by invisible ropes.

"You—wait," Snape panted, staring up at James with an expression of purest loathing. "You—wait. . . ."

"Wait for what?" Sirius snorted coolly. "What're you going to do, Snivelly, wipe your nose on us?"

Snape let out a stream of mixed swearwords and hexes, but his wand being ten feet away nothing happened.

"Wash out your mouth," James scolded without mercy. " _Scourgify_!"

Pink soap bubbles streamed from Snape's mouth at once; the froth was covering his lips, making him gag, choking him. His eyes full of humiliation and disgrace.

"Leave him ALONE!"

The voice had startled everyone. The crowd jumped and James and Sirius looked around. Remus blinked and perked up a bit at the sight of thr person stalking towards them with an expression of sheer disgust.

James's free hand jumped to his hair again when he realized just who was confronting him. Sirius even raised an eyebrow in mild and stifled surprise.

Lily Evans was not amused. She looked so intimidating St this point but James was simply too audacious to notice the rage that radiated from Lily in waves.

"All right, Evans?" said James, and the tone of his voice was suddenly pleasant, deeper, more mature.

Remus couldn't help but roll his eyes at that. Sirius bit back a snicker and a smile.

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated. She was looking at James with every sign of great dislike. "What's he done to you?"

"Well," James said slowly and in mock thought, appearing to deliberate the point, "it's more the fact that he exists, if you know what I mean. . . ."

Many of the surrounding watchers laughed, Sirius and Peter included, but Remus, still apparently intent on his book, didn't, and neither did Lily.

"You think you're funny," she scoffed and rolled her eyes. "But you're just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone."

"I will if you go out with me, Evans," James compromised quickly. "Go on. . .go out with me, and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again."

Behind him, the Impediment Jinx was wearing off. Snape was beginning to inch toward his fallen wand, spitting out soapsuds as he crawled.

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid," Lily sneered, anger flaring up in those emerald eyes.

"Bad luck, Prongs," Sirius said briskly, turning back to Snape. "OI!"

But too late; Snape had directed his wand straight at James; there was a flash of light and a gash appeared on the side of James's face, spattering his robes with blood.

Through the sudden pain, James whirled about; a second flash of light later, Snape was hanging upside down in the air, his robes falling over his head to reveal skinny, pallid legs and a pair of graying underpants.

Many people in the small crowd watching cheered. Sirius, James, and Peter bellowed and roared with laughter.

Lily, whose furious expression had twitched for an instant as though she was going to smile, glared even harder.

"Let him down!"

"Certainly," James said lazily and he jerked his wand upward.

Snape fell into a crumpled heap on the ground. Disentangling himself from his robes, he got quickly to his feet, wand up, but Sirius beat him there first.

" _Petrificus Totalus_!"

Snape cursed then keeled over again at once, rigid as a board.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted.

She had her own wand out now, which made James and Sirius eyed it warily.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you," James said earnestly though his time held something else.

"Take the curse off him, then!" Lily demanded at once, her grip on her wand handle tightening visibly.

James sighed deeply, then turned to Snape and muttered the countercurse, baring his teeth at Snape.

"There you go," he said, as Snape struggled to his feet again, "you're lucky Evans was here, Snivelly—"

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!" Snape growled before he could stop himself.

And just like that, he could feel every innard turn to lead or shrivel up and die. That look Lily gave him was one he would never forget—even if it was for a fraction of a second.

Lily blinked.

"Fine," she said coolly. "I won't bother in future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, _Snivellus_."

That stung worse than everything Potter and his friends did to him in the past.

"Apologize to Evans!" James roared at Snape, his wand pointed threateningly at him.

That comment from Snape had shocked everyone. Now Remus was looking and watching on though his gaze was more focused on Lily's reaction. She did a fine job of hiding it.

However, when James had said that, Lily had flared up.

"I don't want you to make him apologize," Lily shouted, rounding on James. "You're as bad as he is!"

"What?" James yelped in surprise. "I'd NEVER call you a—you-know-what!"

"Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can — I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it."

Lily squared her shoulders.

"You make me SICK."

She turned on her heel and hurried away.

"Evans!" James shouted after her. "Hey, EVANS!"

But she didn't look back.

"What is it with her?" Names said, trying and failing to look as though this was a throwaway question of no real importance to him.

"Reading between the lines, I'd say she thinks you're a bit conceited, mate," Sirius deadpanned.

"Right," James growled, who looked furious now, "right—"

There was another flash of light, and Snape was once again hanging upside down in the air.

"Who wants to see me take off Snivelly's pants?"

The crowd roared their approval and Snape was upside and flashing those grating underpants once more.

For Snape, this was the most humiliating moment of his life but now it seemed like it was all occuring in a blur and nothing was retaining in his head.

This was Snape's worst memory.

* * *

Remus was silent that entire night. After James and Sirius had given up on their prey, finding it suddenly boring, they had flushed Snape to the lake and walked off like that didn't just happen.

Even worse was the crowd, who was chanting, cheering, and applauding it all. Remus did not say a word to either James nor Sirius and barely spoke a word to Peter.

The truth of the matter was Remus was never more embarrassed to be their friend than he was now. Just after that entire ordeal. He had _seen_ the look Snape gave them.

Remus admired his bravery, his courage to be able to stand up, collect his things, and walk proudly away with his head still high. Remus assumed it was only a mask of bravado but it was better than letting James and Sirius pick on him more.

"You're awfully quiet,"James said.

They were now lounging on the chairs of the Gryffindor Common Room, looking ever so high and mighty. It bothered Remus, so he used books as a distraction.

"Okay," Remus said.

"Come on, mate," Sirius said and nudged Remus with his toe. "What's wrong?"

"Did I ever say anything was?" Remus tested coolly.

Sirius looked taken aback but he backed off.

"I'm due for Perfect Duty," Remus said and closed his book shut. "I'll see you around then."

With that, he got up and left. He didn't even say goodbye. He just left and offered nothing else. It was one of the coldest shoulders Remus had given them and that was not something they were used to.

Remus was only bitter because he knew he had done wrong. During Perfect Duty, Lily did not speak much to him, only keeping to short answers. Remus knew why. He didn't blame her. He hated himself.

Snape was being humiliated by his own friends.

 _His own friends._

And what did Remus do?

 _What?_

Nothing.

* * *

 **So, this year is wrapping up to an end. The next chapter will be the last for this year. It's going to be longer.**

 **I am going to keep plunging on with this series. I plan on writing for sixth and seventh year.**

 **IN ADDITION**

 **I also plan on writing right up to Sirius's imprisonment.**

 **SOOOO**

 **I hope you stick around that long to see that bud and blossom.**

 **Follow, favorite, review this series—this account. PM me—review about anything. Suggestions, advice, feedback, favors.**

 **Thank you, kindly!**


	34. XXXIV: A Walk To Remember

**All rights remain.**

The OWLs results were not coming round to the students until the end of their summer term, right before their sixth year. Students did not seem to mind the fact that their results were not coming in; it just meant they did not have to worry about it until then and they can relax in the warm weather.

The Marauders, at first, were a bit tense, especially in between Remus and the other three. Remus had a great habit of making them head down the guilt trip road more than one by giving them the cold shoulder or pointedly helping others and sticking up door the ones being bullied.

James and Sirius would sometimes be able to pull it off as some kind of agitating and self-image thing against Remus but it proved to be ineffective against the werewolf. James and Sirius then began deflating their heads again and though it was subtle and just barely there, it was there. And that was more than Remus could ask for.

"It's nice out," James commented lazily, laying on the grass and letting the Snitch, once again, flutter about his view. The little golden sphere's hum from the beating wings seemed to be the only noise they could hear, amplified by the silence.

"It makes me wonder why professors do this to us," Sirius grumbled, laying with his hands folded over his stomach.

"Do what?" Peter asked, turning his head and propping himself up on his elbows.

"Keep us stuck inside on such a nice day," Sirius exclaimed with a wave of his hand. "I am sure they know how much agony it is to sit in a musty classroom and stare outside."

"Oh, yeah, I'm sure they do that on purpose," Remus snorted sarcastically, rolling his eyes ever so subtly.

The Marauders lapped into a silence once more albeit it was a comfortable one. The silence stretched a bit more, letting the feeling of plain contentment fall right back into place with the four boys. It was more than enough to Remus.

Fifth year had been quite something for the four friends. It had definitely been a year of madness and redemption, one that would always burn the brightest in their memory. Right from the beginning, The Marauders had this great, huge plan to make their fifth year a sort of memorable one. They certainly achieved that.

Remus pondered what happened over this past year as the sun's warmth seemed to give him a thousand tiny kisses on his skin.

It was turning into something to say the least. Despite the feuds the four boys went through with one another, Remus believed their fights have helped them in more ways than one. He could not help but stare at Sirius for a bit. That bloke was a complicated one and to try and understand this enigma was an impossible task. He never really did understand, either, why Sirius told Snape about his lycanthropy. Remus never really thought about what Snape did afterward either or what he was feeling.

"You're staring again," Sirius murmured softly, opening his eyes and looking back at Remus.

The fifth year flushed a bit and scowled a little when he realized he was caught but he passed it off with a shrug and went back to whatever he was doing.

Sirius chuckled just a little. Figures. Typical. Remus, the forever pondering one, was brooding over the philosophical question of life and death or whatever that bloke thinks about. Although, Sirius did not blame him. If he had Remus's brain, he wouldn't stop thinking either.

Sirius looked about the Great Hall and stared at a group of students that walked past them. They were talking about their next year at Hogwarts and what they were expecting social and academic wise. It amused Sirius to an extent but then his eyes landed on someone else.

Snape. But it was not just Snape he was looking at. It was the person sitting next to Snape—Regulus.

~FLASHBACK~

"Sirius! Come play outside!" Regulus begged, eyes shining with youthful innocence.

Sirius, as a nine year old, snorted and rolled his eyes. "Go away, Reg. I can't go outside."

Regulus frowned leaned against Sirius's doorway, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "Well, sure you can! Why...why can't you?"

"I've been grounded till the ends of the Earth, prat," Sirius barked viciously, taking his pent up anger out on his brother. His parents left him wounded and be had no one to turn to but Regulus to lash out on. "So bugger off."

Regulus looked hurt but he did not give up. "Tell Mummy you want to play with me. She likes me—"

"That's just it you little brat!" Sirius shouted, leaping to his feet and rushing at Regulus, taking his brother by the shoulder. "Mum likes you! Not me! That means less for me and more for you! And you know it! Go away!"

Just as Regulus was about to reply, there was a hand on Sirius's shoulder and another on his head, gripping it tightly.

"Sirius Orion Black!" Walburga bawled, shoving Sirius away from Regulus and pushing Sirius into his room.

Regulus had tears in his eyes when the door to Sirius's room was slammed in his face.

Sirius was preoccupied being backed against the wall by his mother's vicious claw-like nails. Her teeth were bared and she looked ready to pounce on him. If Sirius were a dog at that time, he would have had his ears pinned back and tail between his legs.

"Do not touch your bother!" Walburga screamed, slapping Sirius on the chest.

The sound rebounded throughout his room, though the pain was much worse. Sirius doubled over when he swore he thought his sternum had cracked just a little. Walburga was wearing a ton of rings on her hand. There were six just on one hand.

"I didn't!" Sirius half-spat back, resisting the urge to spit out the blood that tinged his tongue. It tasted horrible.

"Lies!" Walburga screamed again, taking her talons and pushing Sirius against the wall again, this time enough to make Sirius's head throb.

"I only grabbed his arm!" Sirius pleaded, now forgetting his rebellious and defiant attitude. "Nothing else, I promise, Mother!"

Walburga threw Sirius away from her as she wiped her lip after spitting on her son. She looked at him with such fueled hate, one almost would have expected Sirius to have done something horrid to Walburga in the past to make her act like this.

"I am not finished with this conversation, Sirius. I promise you that," she vowed deeply and meaningfully.

Sirius let his body tremble as he backed away from his mother as far as he could. Walburga stormed out followed by Orion and slammed the door shut. Sirius could hear the familiar _click_ of his door, indicating he was locked in.

That was the thing; his mother was now looking for excuses to pick on Sirius, to abuse him. It got so bad, Walburga was blaming him for the littlest things when there was nothing legit to blame Sirius for. That was what hurt the most. And the sad part was he kept going right back to his mother and falling to her bidding. Someday, Sirius would have to change that.

~END OF FLASHBACK~

"Earth to Padfoot," James joked, poking Sirius in the cheek. "What has your oatmeal ever done to you?"

Sirius blinked then did so rapidly, realizing he had been staring (or glaring) at his bowl of for the past five minutes. He flushed a bit as he pushed the food away, trying not to make it look like the bowl personally insulted him or something.

"Sorry, I wasn't listening, what?" Sirius said, turning to his friend and looking slightly embarrassed for being caught staring at nothing.

James pulled a curious face before launching into detail about how Lily Evans had officially stopped talking and reaching out to Snape. He was firing off his completely new plan and how disappointed he was that his new plan would practically have to wait for next year.

"What a shame, Prongs," Peter said lazily, half listening.

"I know!" James said genuinely, frowning at the idea of having to wait for his love of his life. "I could have her by now but the year decided to end now and they decided to end their godawful friendship now!"

"What a tragedy, tell me more," Remus mocked though he wore a small smile on his tired features.

"I will!" Jame huffed. "I will tell you more—"

"He was kidding," Sirius deadpanned and put his chin in his hand. "Let it go, Prongs. You have sixth _and_ seventh year."

"You make that sound like I have so much time," James said though he did drop most of that subject.

Sirius pulled a face at the same time Remus and Peter both did. James rolled his eyes and helped himself to more toast, slapping on as much jam as he could.

"Thanks," James said with a roll of his eyes, "for all your support. By the way, did you know their chocolate chip brownies are actually really good?"

"Sure," Remus replied vaguely.

The Marauders lapsed back into a comfortable silence; it was the kind of silence where they found absolutely no tension, which was somewhat of a rarity in between the four at times. During this silence, each to their own. Sirius was helping Peter master the intricate art of spreading jam over toast so the amount was even all around. James was sipping on his marmalade, watching the table and his friends' hands, looking at Sirius curiously as if he could see something invisible to the naked eye. Remus was taking polite sipd of his warm Puer Tea from China and reading the Daily Prophet.

Those blue eyes scanned the articles until they landed on something specific. Remus paused with his drink halfway to his lips as he read, eyebrows drawn together with a sort of troubled expression that was stifled. He was also the first to break the silence.

"If happened again," Remus said.

It was all he needed to say for his friends understood what he meant immediately. The other three dropped whatever they were doing and lean over as Remus spread the paper out flat on the table and pushed it over for them to read.

The Daily Prophet said:

 **Obituary**

 **Willow Dayes, age twenty-eight, was found dead in her bedroom. Aurors claim she was murdered effortlessly in her sleep for they found her wand, untouched, at her bedside and no sign of a struggle.**

 **Willow Dayes was a spirited young witch; "she was an idealist who never took her eyes off her prize. As a Muggle-born, no one would have expected her to go very far with what the Wizarding society had put on her but she had done it," said her father.**

 **Willow Dayes was a Supreme Judges for the Ministry, elected personally by the Minister himself. With her blood status and her ranking position within the Ministry was most likely the motive behind her murder. However, her family stated clearly to not let that stop anyone like it did not stop Willow.**

 **"We are here to show that Muggle-borns will not be overlooked! We will not be ignored! No one will make us run in fear."**

 **Willow Dayes was truly a statue of belief and power. She was strong willed and independent. The only reason she did not make a bigger impact on the world was because her life was sorrosfully taken early from her. Muggle-borns are just as capable and let Wilow Dayes prove blood status does not matter!**

Sirius set the article down with a stoic expression. He knit his eyebrows together as if in deep thought.

"Pity this happened," he stated quietly. "My mum would hate this."

Remus watched as something sparked in Sirius's eyes. It kind of worried him to say the least but trying to stop Sirius at times was like trying to stop the sun from rising. Remus knew it. Sirius keeping the article was an act of rebellion against his parents' beliefs on blood status.

James knew that, too, for he drew his eyebrows together and frowned slightly. Sirius noticed everyone staring at him and stopped what he was doing.

"What?" he asked blandly.

They all paused until Remus piped up.

"Don't you think this rebellious act is going to cost you someday?"

"What? For standing up for what is right?" Sirius said, taken aback. "I disagree! I think what I am doing is not about me."

Remus wanted to believe Sirius but doubt had settled deep in his mind. He knew Sirius was standing up for what was right; it was the method that frightened Remus the most. It bothered him in every way but saying something to refute Sirius on such a touchy topic such as his family was out of the question.

"So anyway," James said smoothly, sensing the tension. "What are you all planning for the summer holidays?"

"Everything and nothing," Sirius said, perking back up to his happy self. "If I make it another summer, I think I'm ditching early and living in a cheap motel or something."

James snorted and took a bite of his toast. "You could always crash at my place. We're a welcoming lot, I promise."

Remus did not respond at first nor did Peter; truthfully, he did not know what he was going to do over break. He knew his cousin, Caden, was going to be busy and though he still was quite fond of her, she was growing distant. It did not bother him, it was just inconvenient to have to come home when no one was there.

Remus was also aware of Peter's situation at home and worried about his friend as much as he worried about Sirius going home. Peter's father was rather deranged in Remus's opinion. Both parents drank a little too much for Remus's liking but it was not his job to openly question adults. Perhaps he could do something about that because he knew how much Peter dreaded going home; that was a deep conversation they had one night whilst waiting up for James and Sirius after a late Quidditch practice.

Peter sighed very subtly and picked at his oatmeal, finding his appetite for it gone. He was aware of Remus's gaze and raised his, meeting Remus's eyes for a moment. Blue and blue, they seemed to have telepathically communicated, sending one message.

 _Stay at my place over the summer._

It was all the invitation Remus needed as he nodded quietly. Sirius and James were busy conversing with one another to have noticed but once the silence overcame them again, each to their own thoughts.

However, Remus did not get too long of a moment to ponder for Lily Evans was tapping him on the shoulder. James watched the ordeal with a blank stare. Remus stood up and walked away to preserve the privacy of their conversation.

"You'll...write to me, won't you?" Lily asked, putting her hand in the crook of her elbow. "Over the break, you'll write?"

"Yeah but is that why you pulled me over?" Remus asked, nudging her to a new angle when he saw a couple of Ravenclaws leaning in close.

There was a small rumor Remus and Lily were seeing one another after her and Snape got into their big fight. Remus suspected Mary MacDonald had something to do with it but he never really payed the rumor much attention.

"Where are you staying?" Lily blurted out.

"Peter's," Remus answered and frowned. "Is it your sister again?"

The expression Lily wore answered Remus's question in a heartbeat. She looked like she wanted to cry so Remus placed his arms around her and offered silent comfort. Lily melted into his embrace and threw his arms around his neck, sniffling about the hateful words her former best friend was spitting at her.

Remus knew it was a problem but he never fully understood the extent to which Lily suffered from Petunia. Remus had the glorious honor of meeting the girl and to say the least, he was unnerved by the girl. She was the polar opposite of Lily but perhaps she was not always like that.

As he hugged Lily, he heard a disdainful sniff from the Slytherin table with his enhanced hearing and perked up, looking over to see Snape glaring at his plate of food, which was nearly empty and untouched. Remus would have cared but Lily continued to cling to him as she wept silently so he did not back away.

"What have I done to her, Remus?" Lily asked in defeat, sniffling.

"Nothing and that is what makes it unfair," Remus said in explanation but he pulled away and looked at her. "She feels left out and takes it out on you because she doesn't want you to know."

Lily wiped at her eyes and pulled her hair over one shoulder. "I..."

She trailed off miserably.

Remus shrugged a little and patted her shoulder. "We'll talk over break, okay?"

Lily managed a watery smile and poked him in the chest. "I'll hold you to that."

* * *

The Marauders were in their dormitory with Frank Longbottom, packing away their things. There was a stretch of silence again but none of them really minded. The sound of rustling papers, folding clothes, and wrappers of food were stuffed into trunks.

Remus was currently sitting on the edge of his newly made bed and stared at the textbooks in his hand. Fifth year was over and it felt like it barely begun; this year had been particularly hard on him but he knew the worst year was going to be sixth. He was worried about just how far he could push himself in his classes; he could barely handle the disappointed expressions of his professors when they saw his marks were not as high as before.

He sighed and put the books in his lap, drumming his fingers on the hardcover.

Remus wondered if he truly was the only one who felt like they were struggling. There were times where he wanted to wish away his existence but he was awfully glad he was still here.

"Bugger, I lost my notebook for Defense Against the Dark Arts," Frank said, breaking the silence. "I swore I had it lying on my bed this morning."

"Is that it?" Sirius asked, pointing at the notebook underneath the bed.

"Ah," Frank said happily and went to retrieve it.

Remus looked at the four people he bunked with for the past five years and smiled just a little. It felt like a proper revival knowing he had friends around him. It made him feel fortunate after other said unfortunate events.

"Are you an Alice still seeing each other?" Sirius asked, temporarily forgetting Remus was in the room.

"Yeah, it's almost been a year," Frank said and looked subtly at Remus.

Sirius winced and turned to Remus, who was staring out the window. "Sorry, Moony. I keep forgetting that you and her used to be a thing."

Remus shrugged it off, not too bothered by it currently. "I don't mind. She's great and everything but she and I would have never worked. We just don't work well like that. I dunno."

James tilted his head at Remus's choice of words but he said nothing, instead, resuming his packing. His fingers traced over a picture he kept for years. It was one taken at the end of their first year. The four of them were simply smiling at the camera, which always made James smile a little. He never let go of this picture and if someone asked, this was one of the most precious pictures he had.

He set it away safely in his trunk then closed it with a snap. He was finished packing his things and when he stared at his station, where he slept for the entire year, he felt a pang of emptiness. He knew he was coming back in about two to three months but he always felt like this after every year. His bed was neatly made and his nightstand was barren and empty.

The floor around his bed was clean and not littered with his belongings. James had to admit, getting that acceptance letter to Hogwarts had to be one of the best things in his life.

Remus packed away the last of his chocolate after distributing most of it to his roommates. He, too, was finished packing. He stuck his wand in his back pocket and slung his jacket over his arm. He magicked his trunk upright with a wave of his hand and with another wave, lifted the handle to it.

"Oh ho, show off," Sirius said fondly.

Remus smirked. "Eh, just because I can."

Peter was trying to cram his textbooks into his trunk but for some reason, they just would not fit. Most of his clothes were bundled into balls in his trunk and his extra pair of shoes were jutting out. He was not the best of packers nor the most organized. He could feel someone at his right side then saw a wand pointed at his things; Peter watched as his clothes folded themselves and his shoes rearranged themselves. His other items were stacked neatly and tucked away cleanly.

"See?" Remus said and placed the books easily on top of Peter's button down shirts.

Remus stowed his wand away and closed Peter's trunk. "There."

Peter flashed him a grateful smile and the four boys came forward, meeting in the middle. They all looked at one another for a moment before they all broke into wide smiles.

"Are we heading down now?" Sirius asked, looking at the door and draping an arm around Remus's slender shoulders.

"Coming, Frank?" Remus asked, stopping at the doorway.

"Yeah, but I promised Alice I'd walk with her," Frank said a bit coyly.

Remus chuckled and swung the door open, putting his jacket on as they made their way down the winding stairs. The Common Room was filled with bustling and conversing people but none seemed too interested in The Marauders. The four were able to easily slip out of the crowded area and into the open and empty corridors.

It would be a whole two months before they would be back roaming these halls. Two months did not seem like a lot but it was a surprisingly a long time. The cliche _Walking Down Memory Lane_ would have been perfect for the situation at hand but not a word was said between the four.

They had made it to the Great Hall and ground level of the castle when the rest of the students began filing out. They were all heading outside to catch a glimpse of the nice weather before boarding the Hogwarts Express.

Remus, James, Peter, and Sirius all walked down to the station first, looking at the stationary red train, ready to take them all home for the break. At once, the four of them turned to stare back at the castle. It stood tall against the blue-white sky, the sun suddenly making the castle brighter. Whether it was a trick of their imagination or not, the castle seemed to shine.

The Hogwarts Express belched out steam from the pipe, indicating it was ready to go. The students around the train were all looking back at the castle now. Perhaps they were all thinking the same thing.

* * *

Boarding the train, The Marauders chose one of the first compartments. Remus and Sirius sat across from each other and closest to the window while Peter sat beside Sirius and James sat beside Remus.

While they waited for everyone else to board, they sat in silence, staring out the window together at the castle. Their school was something they held immense pride; that sense of familiarity formed a tight bond between the four of them that could never be emulated.

About twenty minutes later, the doors closed to the train and the locomotive lurched forward with a blaring honk. Remus saw Hagrid at the station, waving to the kids. The Marauders, when their window passed Hagrid, all waved back.

They kept their eyes on Hogwarts until the castle was shrinking into the distance, falling out of sight. When the train made its first turn, the castle was completely out of their sight and instead, trees surrounded and filled their view instead.

"What do you think?" Remus said, breaking the silence first.

He sat back on the compartment bench and folded his arms over his chest.

"Of what? This year?" James asked, looking at Remus.

"What else?" Remus snorted.

"This year was crazy and I think this year will be our craziest," Sirius said earnestly. "Think about it! Just in the beginning of the year, Prongs, Wormtail, and I were brewing an illicit potion."

"We became Animagi," Peter said, not being able to help but sound prideful about that.

"That...is still surreal to me," James agreed and rubbed the corner of his eyes. "We had a huge falling out."

"Oh yeah," Sirius said a bit quieter this time. "That was on me, you lot. I'm sorry for that, by the way. It...that was never my intention."

"We've all forgiven you, Padfoot," Remus said generously, using his foot to nudge Sirius's leg. "It's time you forgive yourself. What's done is done. I don't really dwell on whatever shite happened then."

Sirius promised himself he would never forgive himself for that but the sincerity in Remus's tone made him think perhaps it was time to let it go. He had learned his lesson, hadn't he? He most certainly had.

"There are times when we just needed to lash out," Peter agreed fairly. "Tensions were too high."

Recalling their year made them all wonder what was the greatest parts or the worst parts. The problem was there was always more than one memory that could have been the greatest or the worst. Perhaps being unable to pinpoint that was the best thing about this year.

"Do you remember what we said in the beginning of the year?" James suddenly asked, sitting up straighter.

The others sat in silence.

"Seriously?" James said in exasperation and rolled his eyes fondly. "We said we were going to make this year a promising one."

He raised his arms up.

"Have we not done that? Hell, I think we have!"

The rest of them broke out into smiles as the memory came back. James pulled out his camera and wiggled his eyebrows, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He held up the camera, earning three smiles in response.

This time, it was Sirius who kept the picture.

It was nearly midnight by the time the train came dwindling to a halt at King Cross Station. Students were blearily stepping out of the train and retrieving their trunks and other belongings.

Parents were running up their kids and hugging them tightly, telling them how much they missed them. The excitement of seeing family buzzed heavily in the air but The Marauders stood back, lingering at the edge of the massive crowd.

"How was it?"

The voice made all four of them turn around. It was James's parents and his father was the one who spoke up.

"It was something," James said and smiled warmly at his father.

James's father patted his shoulder as his mother hugged him. Then each of The Marauders got a warm hug from James's mother. It felt nice to be embraced by a mother, especially for Sirius.

The Marauders began parting ways when they each spotted their own set of guardians. James went with his parents back home; the Potters were gone. Peter's mother was there to hug him in welcome, offering to take his trunk for him. Peter shook his head and told his mother Remus was planning on spending holiday break with them. His mother merely smiled and nodded. The Pettigrews went off. Remus found his cousin and went off with her; the welcome seemed a little forced but it was comfortable enough. Caden patted Remus's shoulder and took his trunk for him. Remus smiled at the attempt to make amends and loosened up considerably. The Lupins were off.

That left Sirius and Regulus waiting for their parents. Sirius feared going home and he was secretly wishing he had taken up on that offer to crash at James's place. His thoughts were interrupted when Regulus nudged Sirius sharply and tilted his chin at the two figures walking towards them.

Witches and wizards took a step back as Walburga and Orion Black came into view with their heads held high. Walburga was decked out in the most expensive jewelry and the most exquisite black dress with a white blazer over it. Her black hair was pulled back in a braid; her face did hold the youth all the Blacks were blessed with but her eyes were nothing but cold pits.

"Onward," she said shortly, leading her sons away from the station.

Sirius sucked in a deep breath and mentally steeled himself for whatever came his way.

His father held up the rear, herding his children in between him and their mother. Sirius felt slightly vulnerable this way but he was forced to walk with a sort of grace and aristocratic elegance. He did, however, steal a last glance over his shoulder at the Hogwarts Express.

He smiled.

Their fifth year, as promised, had certainly been one they would remember.


	35. NOTES

It's probably highly unnecessary to add a whole extra chapter just for an Author's Note but I'm going to do it anyway.

 **1.) I want to thank everyone who stuck through this story with me. At the complete end of The Marauders school year, I am so doing paper plate awards for every reviewer! So a warm thanks is in order!**

2.) I have not yet decided how far I am going to go with The Marauders series in general. I know, for sure, I am going to go up to the Potter's death.

3.) For the slower updates, this year's been pretty busy for me. This last chapter, I was in China so I wasn't able to write much. I crammed this entire chapter in one night.

4.) I really do hope you enjoyed the story.

 **5.) Stick around for _The Marauders Sixth Year_!**

Sincerely,

Your (er...) fanfiction author who fills in your time when your bored with her stories.

-Steffes


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